Day 29:
I'll... sing you a-a song... a good song o' the sea...
I must be by the water. I can't leave it. The sound. The sound.
The sound. Water. But I don't thirst it. I thirst sticky, sweet flavours. And pungent flowers and musks.
The images. I think I know them. I hear and see and smell them like my own. They are my own. Surely-
I can't be wrong.
I know that life. I've lived it.
Felt it. Breathed it.
Breathed her.
Him. Them. All of them.
Mother Father Brothers Sisters Uncles Aunties Grandfathers Grandmothers Friends Crew LOVER.
SON.
I know you! I know you all! I remember- I remember!!
Oh.

Hrm. I... Don't sound myself. Maybe...

Maybe I ought to take a drink.

...

Day 30:

My name is Charlotte Jane Skinner.
Please, call me Charlie.
I died, aged 28.
I was slain by the law.
I was sentenced to hang from the neck until dead.
I died in the gallows in London.
I was a Captain. I sailed from East to West.
My ship was called The Merry Rose.
I was born on that ship.
My Father was her Captain, before me.
My Father's name was Charles Edward Skinner.
My Mother's name was Mary Rose Cooper.
I had three brothers, and three sisters.
I loved to sing.
I played the fiddle.
I enjoyed smoking and drinking.
And I was a womanizer.
I fell in love with a whore when I was young.
She left me to marry a lord.
And she left me the son she didn't intend to bear.
And I raised him as my own.
I named him Jeremy.
I was given the map to a treasure trove by the son of a historian.
I followed the map with the help of another.
A woman.
Her name was- I shouldn't say.
All I should say, is that I loved her.
Loved her. Until the last.
And then I betrayed her.
I left her behind when we became close.
Because I was afraid of loosing her.
So I lost her.
And I found a whore and stole her away.
The whore told me she had fallen for me.

“The forest can be dull at times.
No wind to move the trees.
No fights for entertainment.
Relentless doldrums of monotony.
During these times I choose to make my own entertainment.
How?
Well there is a story to tell.”

Hmmm... Returning here has made me rethink an old hobby...

A few years ago I became interested in learning clay modelling, so that I could maybe commission custom little figurines for people here, and maybe even build up a business of sorts around it if I eventually became skilled enough. I'm artistic by nature, but I've never been good enough to become professional in any medium of art. I'm good at drawing, but not fantastic. It's my biggest flaw; I can do lots of things great, but nothing *amazing* that would set me apart and make me actually employable for those skills.

But I had never tried modelling before and knew I was capable of learning how, and the interest and enthusiasm was there. TEF was the inspiration for this. That Christmas, I asked for (and received) a rudimentary set of clays and paints to experiment with.

I made and finished one figure; a deer, which ironically wasn't TEF related at all. By this time I was already drifting away from the Forest and doing other things. The deer was actually something from a game I was playing at the time.

It was difficult. It didn't turn out well. And unfortunately, the combination of leaving the Forest and having such a hard time with the clays (more than I had expected due to their poor quality), I was more than unhappy with the result. I gave up then and there.

But looking at it now, sitting on my shelf as it has done for years after I abandoned the hobby... for a first try, it's actually... not that bad. In fact, considering I followed no tutorials, had no help, no training, no experience, no tips and horrible air-hardening clay that was a nightmare to work with, it's actually... pretty good!

This has only just hit me. Returning here has made me realise that perhaps I was wrong to abandon it so quickly. I could be good at this, if only I worked at it, took it seriously. Hmm...

I'm going to need encouragement and help.

Just tossing all my sketches and such here..rabblerabble.
(Some large photos may follow)