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Serene [Updates] Remembrance

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December 19, 2010 - 11:38am — Phaios
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Feel free to interact*Both text and visual roleplay are welcome. If you have been given my Skype/Discord address, you are welcome to interact there as well. with Phaios and Endriaga here.
Warnings and Disclaimers


I decided I really didn't like the back-end of that journal code :I So here we are

Biography:
A Ray of Dusk; The Red of Dawn

Plot Blogs:
Death is the Road to Awe
An Unfinished Life
A Glimmer of Hope
Remember Us
We Meet in Dreams


Note: Endriaga can generally be assumed to be resting with Phaios or hanging around in a tree nearby [but likely will not be logged in]. Not a deer as she was before, but instead a miniature dragon.


12-18-2022

Physical
Denotes physical fitness - wounds, illness, etc.
: Healthy. [100/100]
Mental
Mental health determines the stability of emotional health, rationality and decision-making skills, and emotional recovery time.
: Well [90/100]
Emotional
Emotional health is an indication of the state of self-perceived well-being. It is not necessarily bound by "happy" and "unhappy."
: Content [90/100]
Demeanor
Current behavior and posture/body language.
: Quiet, thoughtful

How many years has it been?


Has spent the last few months with little in the way of drama. Content to be bored most of the time, although she does at times feel quite lonely. As such, she has been happily reconnecting with Illrose and Carmine when she comes across them. In particular, surprised and incredibly grateful when first Illrose and then Carmine sought her out in the deep fog of October and stayed with her for a number of days until it passed; the mist bound her senses uncomfortably and left her on edge and feeling blind, but having a steady presence greatly eased that stress.

A little more melancholy now that the snow has arrived, often lost in thought. Not really a fan of the cold. Spending a little more time around Eraline's grave when she's on her own.


Previous Entries

September 5, 2012 - 2:41am — Waning-Sun
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The stag's ears flickered at

The stag's ears flickered at her words. Anubis making a whole world? Maybe Khepri, but Anubis? Akhenaton refrained from commenting, after all, what did he know of what the Gods did, especially in this world? "Man?" the question took him off guard. He assumed she would know...or have an idea, "Man...man is this creature that stands on two legs, wanders around and picks fights with others of their kind. They've got a mind that's capable of thinking most things through, but some of them don't use it. They live in massive herds and have no defenses to them, like our hooves or antlers. But they're not to be underestimated." he took a breath, "Embalming is where you take someone who has died and preserve them for the aferlife." All at once the thought occured to him, causing his feathers to ruffle slightly. What if this was the afterlife? It hadn't occured to him to be that, there were few others, like that Heth, who could be considered Egyptian. Besides, wouldn't the pharoahs be here? But...Re had said...had said this was his second chance...what if that was because he didn't die back home, he didn't get a proper burial?
—
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September 5, 2012 - 2:57am — Phaios
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The doe looks thoughtful as

The doe looks thoughtful as she listens to Akhenaton's descriptions. "Beings who walk on two legs seem to have a lot of troubles," she remarks. Her expression is puzzled, however, on the subject of embalming. "Preserve them?" Phai's nose crinkles slightly as she tries to work out the reasoning behind such a thing. "You mean to bury?" Deer did such things, after all, and she'd seen graves elsewhere before. Maybe it was just a synonym she'd never heard. With the shift in his feathers, one of Phai's ears slants askew with uncertainty. Had she said something off?
September 5, 2012 - 6:25am — Waning-Sun
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"Somewhat like burying. Just

"Somewhat like burying. Just instead of allowing the body to...to be consumed by the elements, they are preserved with their belongings,"he forced his feathers to lie flat again when he noticed her unease, not wanting to frighten her. No, that'd be the last thing he would want to do.
—
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September 5, 2012 - 7:22am — Phaios
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Phai's brows knit together

Phai's brows knit together with befuddlement. Why would they ever want to do that? Keeping dead things around seemed... creepy. She keeps the question to herself, though, wondering if the answer was something she really wanted to know. "Oh," she answers instead, looking for a change in subject, since talk of this odd imbalmining thing seemed to have (quite litterally) ruffled his feathers. "...Were you always a deer?" He seemed to know an awful lot about these two-leg-walkers. Maybe he was all bird before?
September 5, 2012 - 7:30am — Waning-Sun
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"No," Akhenaton replied

"No," Akhenaton replied quietly, "I was human, an Egyptian, if you want to get more specific." She didn't know much, or remembered little, to have had a life before, he decided. Yet, he held his tongue.
—
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September 5, 2012 - 7:44am — Phaios
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"Really?" Phai studies him

"Really?" Phai studies him seriously, trying to remember a long-ago conversation. "I've a friend who says humans are evil creatures. He isn't, though..." She found it difficult to believe her great-grandfather's world could be like that, too, if humans were Egyptian. A wry smile crosses her face for just a moment. "And you don't seem to be, unless you're hiding something." And off on a tangent she goes! "Is their world really silver?"
September 5, 2012 - 7:53am — Waning-Sun
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"It depends on the human,

"It depends on the human, honestly. They're like deer. There are some that are good and some bad," he paused at her question, tipping his head to the side, "Silver...? I'm afraid I don't understand what you mean."
—
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September 5, 2012 - 8:06am — Phaios
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"Silver. The color? Like..."

"Silver. The color? Like..." The doe touches the side of her muzzle to the red and white marking on her right foreleg. "Well, it's not a bangle any more, and I've lost my earring, but..." Looking up again, she seems a little disappointed. "I suppose it's not, then."
September 5, 2012 - 8:15am — Waning-Sun
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"Oh, no, no. The world isn't

"Oh, no, no. The world isn't silver. At least, not like the metal. It can appear to be though, if the conditions are favorable. The world looks a lot like the forest, except....well Egypt has much more sand. The Greeks liked their silver, but Egypt preferred gold," he smiled at that, thinking of all the jewerly the Kings would wear in his time, and the times before. They did like their gold.
—
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September 5, 2012 - 8:23am — Phaios
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"Hm. That's a shame... I

"Hm. That's a shame... I should like to see a silver world." It was a lovely image in her head, at least. "We wore both, if we were lucky enough to be favored with some. I used to have a number of trinkets... The earring, this red and silver one, a blue and gold one here... and plain gold and silver on the backs." With 'here' she indicates her left foreleg, opposite the red and white marking. "They all meant something. To me, at least. Memories," she hums softly. "Humans have trinkets?"
September 5, 2012 - 8:39am — Waning-Sun
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"Yes...some hold the

"Yes...some hold the significance like yours does. Memories... but others though, hold power, show how much wealth and power they had over everyone else. Yet, that's just the gems and such. They're a lot like we are, Phaios, they just understand things a little different." He replied softly.
—
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September 5, 2012 - 8:44am — Phaios
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She blinks. Power? "I suppose

She blinks. Power? "I suppose that makes sense... Usually only the older ones could get such things, or those with bonds." The doe snuffs lightly. "But shows of power were usually made with teeth or quills or claws or that awful static. I think I like the humans' way better." Much shinier.
September 5, 2012 - 7:59pm — Waning-Sun
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Akhenaton chuckled, "Humans

Akhenaton chuckled, "Humans like to strut around with their gems, but they also strut around with weapons of metal. They don't have fangs or quills to be intimidating with, so they have to improvise. There were times when I'd rather be facing a monster of fangs and claws than a human."
—
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September 6, 2012 - 5:01am — Phaios
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"Like metal teeth?" That

"Like metal teeth?" That didn't sound too far-fetched to her. Phai hums softly. "What sorry creatures, to have nothing to defend themselves properly with... You'd think the things that eat would kill them all." She shakes her head a bit. "No wonder I'd never heard of them before here." They couldn't possibly make it out in the woods.
September 6, 2012 - 5:09am — Waning-Sun
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"Somewhat...they're more like

"Somewhat...they're more like an extension of your legs, or arms as they call them. Or my wings," he flexed his wings slightly, "You would think that, but they're smart enough to learn to defend themselves with their weapons. I wouldn't say they're smart enough to not kill themselves with them, but they do all right against something that wants to kill them. Though, it's rare that they can win in a fight if they're alone. Now...get a bunch of them together...anything that wishes them harm doesn't stand a chance," he shook his head at that, remembering the old tales of the pharoahs going on hunts through the desert, racing in their chariots with their hounds. He didn't want to think of the last hunt he had witnessed. It was him they were hunting.
—
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September 6, 2012 - 5:15am — Phaios
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Phaios grunts softly. "I'd

Phaios grunts softly. "I'd like to see them try with one of our shape-shifters... But I suppose big enough things have succumbed to a mass of ants." She eyes his wings thoughtfully. "I never was much good with my wings in a fight. More for show and for bluff, to be honest... Wings are uncommon among my kind. Only our Mother's champions are granted them, so they're a bit daunting in and of themselves."
September 6, 2012 - 6:04am — Waning-Sun
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Oh, yeah, the weird mini with

Oh, yeah, the weird mini with the ram horns was Kaye. She felt like wandering and decided to watch Phaios. She's shy and harmless. And she found that mini fawn adorable. lol

"It'd be interesting to watch humans handle shiftshapers..." Akhenaton agreed, though his ears went back in confusion at her next words. Mother's champions? Oh...the deity she believes in.."Uncommon? I guess that would make sense...I haven't seen many around with wings in my wanderings of the forest..."
—
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September 6, 2012 - 6:39am — Phaios
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"Mhm. There were only...

"Mhm. There were only... fff..." It takes her a moment to count. "Six of us, before the land began to die. I was the third - Serene Remembrance - and the only one of my species." The doe peers skyward, eyes distant as though there's something she can see beyond the clouds. "I don't know what rules govern the wings of deer, but you're right - I haven't seen many, and I don't recall any that didn't look something like a bird. I don't suppose past lives count, either, as mine are certainly gone." A glance is cast briefly down at her shoulders. "Save for the markings, that is."

[Ah, I was wondering x3 Couldn't figure out who the picto went to.]
September 6, 2012 - 6:56am — Waning-Sun
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Yep! It was her. "What did

Yep! It was her.

"What did you do in your old life? And you're right about the past lives thing, I think. I didn't have wings, in mine, nor was I remotely related to an owl," he smiled at that, but it steadily died as he waited for the doe to answer.
—
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September 6, 2012 - 7:17am — Phaios
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"Ah, but owls are such

"Ah, but owls are such interesting birds. Strong and silent," she answers before turning to his question. "Do? For such a title, you mean?" Her eyes return to a more earthly level a second time, focusing instead on Akhen. "For that you must understand something of our world, but I'll gladly tell you if you've the patience for it."
September 6, 2012 - 7:36am — Waning-Sun
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The stag chuckled, "I've got

The stag chuckled, "I've got plenty of patience, My Lady. I'd gladly hear your tale," he offered her a half bow, fanning his wings slightly.
—
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September 6, 2012 - 7:39am — Phaios
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[Congratulations, Akhen,

[Congratulations, Akhen, you've won a wall-o-text!]

The doe contemplates this for several breaths, wondering how exactly one puts an entire culture into a few sentences. "Each of us had an Ankh on our chest, she begins. "Mine's faded, now," she mentions as an aside, touching her nose briefly to a lighter patch of hairs nestled among the gray on her chest, "but the fur grew in a different color depending on age and strength and ranking. Those with a gold Ankh were the Guardians; silver Ankhs were the Hondos. These were the protectors and peacekeepers of our race, each chosen by our Mother. They were granted special abilities to give them an edge when they needed it - to break up disputes and so on." Phai pauses to take a breath and re-gather herself. "Our world was peaceful at times, but there was a constant war among the gods in which we were often used to determine who would win. At one time, after our Mother died so that we might live and our grandmother took control of the land and rebuilt it, the seven Hondos and Guardians were suddenly changed. They were stripped of all rank and strength. One became angry, one suddenly coveted all things, one hardly moved at all... Some were even less pleasant than that. It was left to us, as a Challenge, to determine what had happened to them. I was simply first to figure it out and to 'cure' them. They were restored to power and I was granted a silver Ankh of my own and the title Serene Remembrance. Things were quiet for a very little while after that, until a friend went missing, and the packs' loyalties were tested."
September 6, 2012 - 7:55am — Waning-Sun
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Yay, a Wall o' Text! /happy

Yay, a Wall o' Text! /happy flail/


The stag listened with interest. He found it odd how there were so many Gods and Goddesses in the skies, yet none of them seemed to cause each other problems. "If you don't mind me asking, then how did you end up here, if you had such a high rank?"
—
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September 6, 2012 - 8:05am — Phaios
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"Ah?" She wonders aloud, not

"Ah?" She wonders aloud, not quite certain what the stag was getting at. "I wouldn't think such a thing would matter. My wold began to fade, and for a long time Endriaga and I were the last. I wandered until I could bear it no more, and then one day when I woke I was a fawn." Phai smiles sadly. "Endri says she heard our Mother's voice. I don't know what became of my home, or the others who once were in it. I catch echoes of them here, now and then - deer who remind me very much of friends I once knew. Even the trees sometimes seem to hum with their memories."
September 6, 2012 - 8:34am — Waning-Sun
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The stag couldn't quite grasp

The stag couldn't quite grasp that idea, "So...you just sort of...faded away?" Everyone he knew, their deaths had been finalized. Set in stone..yet the way the doe described it, it seemed so peaceful in comparision.
—
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September 6, 2012 - 8:46am — Phaios
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"In truth..." The doe

"In truth..." The doe hesitates momentarily. "In truth I had not been 'there' for some years. I suffered many things before the others vanished, and when you're entirely alone - or as alone as we ever can be - time has a strange way of passing and not passing. I recall eight years to my life. It may be so many, or it could be eight years eight times over again. I don't rightly know, some days. So yes... I suppose you could say we had 'faded.' I was not... right for some time. What I was, was - is - gone. This place has been something of a second chance to us. It seems to be so for many I have met here."
September 6, 2012 - 8:46pm — Waning-Sun
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"Is your world still there,

"Is your world still there, or did it die along with you?" the stag's mind was reeling at the thought. Suppose this world just up and decided to fade as well one day?
—
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September 7, 2012 - 6:36am — Phaios
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"I don't know," she says

"I don't know," she says again, voice quiet. "It may only lie empty, or it may be gone entirely. It wouldn't be the first time, though this one seems different from before. I was certainly never a deer before."
September 7, 2012 - 7:18am — Waning-Sun
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The stag nodded, allowing her

The stag nodded, allowing her words to sink in. Her take on the world confused him, but intrigued him all the same. She was from somewhere else, somewhere where there were different customs and different gods, just as he was from different times, than say, Aria. It interested him all the same.
"I appreciate you telling me this, I don't understand too much, but it's interesting all the same. I lived in a world where there was no gray, it was either believe this, or die. To hear that there are other worlds out there...other places and things...well it allows a once closed off mind to open up a bit, to be more accepting...in a sense."
—
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September 7, 2012 - 7:28am — Phaios
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"Mm... My mother called me

"Mm... My mother called me 'Serene Remembrance' for a reason, I suppose. I've many stories." Her head tilts a bit. "Believe or die? That seems a bit harsh. Though I don't suppose we have that problem... The gods walked among us, especially our grandmother. To see our Mother was more rare, but it happened often enough. We were told there were other gods, as well... There was even a tournament for a friend of our Mother's, to find her a worthy assistant." The doe's gaze flicks in the direction of the distant statues' hill. "I'm told these Twin Gods walk among the deer at times, but I've never seen them."
September 7, 2012 - 7:48am — Waning-Sun
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The stag followed her gaze,

The stag followed her gaze, "I suppose seeing the Twins is like seeing one of my gods...you believe they're there, watching over you, but there's a good chance you'll never come across them in you're lifetime."
—
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September 8, 2012 - 10:56pm — Phaios
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Phaios shrugs lightly. "I've

Phaios shrugs lightly. "I've met my Mother several times. And Anubis once, though we didn't speak. Our Grandmother lived among us for a long time. I'm sure it simply depends on the god."
September 10, 2012 - 5:57am — Waning-Sun
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"I guess it must," Akhenaton

"I guess it must," Akhenaton replied, thinking of how rare it was, if at all, he would see his gods. "My people use to interpret 'signs' as the Gods speaking to us, since actually seeing them was reserved for those closest to the Gods themselves."
—
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September 10, 2012 - 6:42am — Phaios
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"Ah... That seems sad.

"Ah... That seems sad. Although, I suppose I'm biased," she muses. She'd grown up among her gods, after all. "Signs were... never a good thing, to us. They generally meant trouble was ahead." The doe's gaze looks far away for a moment before she laughs. "Ah... But of course. Endriaga would like me to make a correction. She came about from one of those 'times of trouble,' so I suppose they weren't always bad. At least not in every way."
September 10, 2012 - 6:59am — Waning-Sun
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Endriaga? He dismissed it, "I

Endriaga? He dismissed it, "I see...but that's how humans were. We were never lucky enough, or blessed enough for the majority to walk among the gods. For us it could be interpreted both ways. They could be either good signs or bad. Sometimes they were good, but much of the time they were usually omens of some sort."
—
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September 10, 2012 - 7:36am — Phaios
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Phaios 'hm's softly. "Did the

Phaios 'hm's softly. "Did the gods ever challenge the humans?" she asks, curious. "I mean... what were the signs for? Were they like riddles?"
September 10, 2012 - 7:47am — Waning-Sun
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The stag took a moment,

The stag took a moment, collecting his thoughts. "Well...in the two cultures I understand, there were multiple gods and goddesses, each one had a specific thing they controlled. Athena was the Goddess of Wisdom and War, among other things, for example. If a specific omen came then it is interpreted as coming from a specific deity. They were for us to determine what they wanted from us, or if they agreed with the King's choices. But...challenge humans? What do you mean by that? They challenged our faith in them many times, if that is what you mean. There were times when we thought that the Gods had turned their heads from us, that we were not worthy of their guidance, if that is what you meant."
—
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September 10, 2012 - 8:38am — Phaios
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"So... they were to guide,

"So... they were to guide, then, mostly? That sounds kind of them." The doe shakes her head. "No, not quite... Challenges were like... well, there were a series of clues that led everyone towards the true challenge. Those were the signs. They were often very vague, especially when those awful twins would give them. They'd alternate speaking every other word or so and it was just about impossible to keep track of what they were saying, but it was always so important you couldn't just tune them out. It was to help us figure out what we were supposed to do to move the gods' disputes along, I suppose is the simplest way to put it. It was all very complicated and they never explained very much to us, most of the time.
September 12, 2012 - 7:01am — Waning-Sun
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"That is rather interesting,"

"That is rather interesting," Akhenaton replied. He wondered if the deities he knew did that when they had a problem. "Kind of like...a game then?"
—
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September 12, 2012 - 7:05am — Phaios
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"Ahm... Well, I suppose, but

"Ahm... Well, I suppose, but it wasn't exactly fun for us, much of the time. There was illness and fighting and loss... It seemed the gods did make a game of it among themselves at times, though." Her expression is thoughtful. She hadn't wondered how much of a game it really was, before.
September 12, 2012 - 7:13am — Waning-Sun
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"That's a cruel game, to put

"That's a cruel game, to put you against your own..." he muttered, his ears going back.
—
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September 12, 2012 - 7:31am — Phaios
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"At times, yes. We had to

"At times, yes. We had to work together, too, though. Sometimes against the gods' will," she chuckles softly. "There were three siblings who were to compete against one another as the gods' champions, but they chose to work together instead. In doing so, they won our Mother back for us."
September 12, 2012 - 7:34am — Waning-Sun
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"Oh...then it's both good and

"Oh...then it's both good and bad, then, yes?" this whole concept confused him, which frustrated the orange stag.
—
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September 12, 2012 - 7:41am — Phaios
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"Yes... Things were

"Yes... Things were difficult, at times, but the rewards were great when things moved in our Mother's favor - personal status among them. Of course, that meant you had to hope such power never fell upon the wrong paws, but... most of those in power were good at heart. Or at least they tried to be." Her eyes cast downwards for a moment, lingering among the grasses. "We all make poor judgments from time to time."
September 12, 2012 - 7:45am — Waning-Sun
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Akhenaton couldn't help but

Akhenaton couldn't help but nod in agreement. Yes, everyone made poor judgments from time to time. If he hadn't had made his, he might have lived a little longer. How much longer, though, he didn't know. "We do..." he glanced away, "Indeed we do. "
—
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September 12, 2012 - 7:51am — Phaios
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Phai lets the silence hang

Phai lets the silence hang for several heartbeats, caught somewhere between a sort or reverence and outright awkwardness. "The Forest is good for that, though," she decides after a while. "For second chances, I mean." The doe's gaze flicks back up to Akhen's face momentarily before darting toward the treetops. "We used to say a first life is for learning, and the second is for living."
September 12, 2012 - 7:56am — Waning-Sun
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Akhenaton nodded, "I like

Akhenaton nodded, "I like that concept, Phaios. It...makes things seem easier to bear. This is...this is our life now...might as well live it out of the restraints of the last one."
—
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September 12, 2012 - 8:10am — Phaios
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"Mm... If there's something

"Mm... If there's something I've learned in my time here, it's that the past isn't to be forgotten... but we can't let it cripple us, either." A faint smile. "I've my share of regrets and hurts, but the time I spent hiding away from the world did as much harm as good. There weren't new wounds, but the old scars couldn't fade, either."
September 12, 2012 - 8:14am — Waning-Sun
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Akhenaton nodded, "I don't

Akhenaton nodded, "I don't think they ever fade, no matter what you do to try to forget them," he agreed softly, "Or confront them...they're always there."
—
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September 12, 2012 - 8:19am — Phaios
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"Hah... No. Some of the more

"Hah... No. Some of the more physical scars even decided to follow." She gestures with her muzzle towards a large, ragged patch of bare skin on her right shoulder. "They don't vanish, but they cease to bleed, is what I mean. It's easier when you aren't alone." Her smile is a little warmer this time. "It's been nice having the girls around."