sympathy for the devil | human/deer roleplay
March 18, 2012 - 9:41pm — Rutilus
This is an open roleplay, and anyone can join; even if I've never spoken to you in all the time we've been here, feel free to join regardless of experience. I love roleplaying with new people ;; ♥ I can roleplay more than one 'scene' with one person so if you want two roleplays, feel free to ask |: Human or deer is fine. I'm also fine with roleplaying the same character with more than one person at the same time so don't worry if I'm already using someone you want 8D
Well--on with the descriptions! I know only Rut's is really properly explained but eeeeh |: All the deer descrips are at least in biographies, and do have a human section so yes.
*sits and stares* 0-0 i guess
I feel bad about starting an
I feel bad about starting an RP right now since we literally pretty much just finished one but uuhhh I'll just keep an eye on this here blog and if you have any ideas or whatnot...(EDIT: IF YOU SAY SO.)
"I'll be back soon. ~ Tut"
But how soon? Martisol was curled up in the corner of the couch where they had sat only... How long ago? Had it already been a day? She had lost track of time, had barely eaten all day. She had not left the house, called in sick, taking the day to just attempt to figure out what exactly happened between them. When she had woken up and realized he wasn't there, she almost thought it had been some sick, sadistic dream that was just trying to torture her. But then she found the note on the table, which calmed her fear some. But it still felt surreal.
Her whole day had been focused on trying to get her mind off of his face. She had done some cleaning, taken a lukewarm shower, frantically scrubbed every surface, done every chore she despised. She had tried playing some upbeat, Latin music, but she kept wanting to change the station to something he would like. She gave up on the music and the chores. Her only thoughts kept going to him.
She remembered the look on his face, the way he looked down at her, surprised, but happy. She even let herself remember the way he had kissed her, his lips gentle but desperate. She wanted to know what he had almost said as he kissed her that last time.
The lighting in living room was dim, the only light coming from mostly-closed blinds and a single light in the kitchen behind her. She was calm, staring at the piece of paper in her hands, but she wanted to run and dance at the same. Out of happiness or out of fear, she didn't know which. All she knew was that she was even more confused than before, but at the same time, she was more excited than she had ever been. She truly felt alive.
Martisol folded up the paper and put it in her lap before leaning her head back to stare at the ceiling fan, watching it slowly turn on its pivot. She could hear her heart thumping loudly in her ears, like a speaker with the bass turned up too loud.
How long was 'soon'?
[ no-name-none you should
AA
'a-well a-bless my soul, what's wrong with me? I'm itchin' like a man on a fuzzy tree
my friends say I'm actin' a-wild as a bug, I'm in love - mm, I'm all shook up!'
When things weren't going well for him the whole world damn well knew it, because he had a tendency to play his music loud as hell in an attempt to make himself feel better, block things out. Fortunately, when he parked his silver motorbike, Elvis Presley's voice was cut off, letting the world quieten again.
Had he waited too long? He'd spent hour after hour just replaying the previous evening in his head over and over, remembering every little detail; the way her lips felt against his, the strength in her voice when she told him she wanted him and no-one else,
Rutilus stood awkwardly on the porch for the longest time before he gathered the courage to knock, exhaling. His eyes were closed for a few seconds while he tried to keep himself calm, heart starting to pound frantically against his chest.
It'll be alright.
His hands fumbled with the keys in the pocket of his leather jacket, blue eyes staring at the glass in the door; he could only make out light and very vague shapes through it, and was waiting for that movement, that shadow that would tell him Martisol was coming to see him. Panic threatened to explode in his chest and for a split second he wanted to run like the stag he was, flee through birches and woods and--
--no, no, no, he was staying. He was seeing this through.
Barely seconds had really passed since he'd knocked, but he was impatient; Rutilus opened the door and walked in, shutting it behind him, heart thudding. He realised there were songs stuck in his head and fought to push them out, because no doubt they'd be ruined for him forever if this went badly. Actually, if it went badly, his entire music collection would probably be ruined.
Christ, Marti, what are you doing to me?
((Seriously. If anyone else
Knock knock.
Eyes opening wide, her heartbeat tripled in about 2 seconds.
Can't be him. Can't be him. Can't be him. She slowly lifted herself off the sofa, shoving the note in her pocket. She walked slowly in the direction of the foyer, her whole body shaking as if she had just jumped into Arctic-cold freezing water.
What if it was him? What would she say? What would she do? Should she kiss him again? Just stand there and wait for him to do it? Just stare at him? Would she cry in her confusion?
Oh, don't you dare cry, Martisol Morales.
When she walked into the foyer, she saw him standing there, just closing the door. 'Say something!' she tried to tell herself. But now words would come out of her mouth. She could only stare.
That surreal feeling came back. Martisol felt like she wasn't in her body anymore, just watching on as she stared at him in the dim light. Do something! Go up to him! Don't let him think you're not ecstatic to see him!
A few more seconds passed, but it felt like an eternity. Then she regained her senses.
She ran up to him impulsively, somewhere between a jog and bounding leaps, and proceeded to throw her arms around his neck. Not in a rough way, almost gentle, but she just had to hold onto him, make sure this was real.
Burying her face in his shoulder, near the base of his neck, she took a deep breath. She breathed in his familiar smell, one of the most comforting things to her. "I-I was afraid... I didn't think you'd be back so soon." She choked out.
Keep calm, Marti. Don't scare him off.
I'm just going to sit here
Except I might be back to interact this time.
/sob.
[ ocean; god damn it when are
also GUYS what AA said man -sob- ]
AA
The world stopped spinning when Martisol opened that door, ocean meeting grass as he stared at her, frozen there. Abruptly she was moving and he could do nothing about it, feeling as if it were in slow-motion yet much too fast, as if she was running through honey or water or space. Then her arms were around him and he was hugging her back, relief surging through him, a flashflood.
"Well, here I am," he murmered into the gypsy's hair, arms wrapped tightly around that beautiful figure. Rutilus pulled back slightly to look down at her, fighting the urge to tug her chin up and kiss her yet again. Songs flashed through his head again and he wanted to shut his brain down to block them out, just in case.
come over to the window, my little darling
I'd like to try to read your palm
I used to think I was some kind of gypsy boy before I let you take me home
Pushing the music from his head he exhaled, carefully letting go of the blonde gypsy, swallowing. "Sorry I up an' left like that," Rut said quietly, eyes averting for a few seconds, guilt making his stomach flip. "I woke up and sort of--I panicked, I think. I think I panicked, so I went 'ome an' couldn't sleep so--anyway."
Shit--he had to tell her. He still hadn't said it. Fuck.
Not yet.
"But--but,"" he continued quickly, aware that he had to make his next point very clear. Rutilus paused for breath, biting the inside of his lip briefly as he tried to word it all exactly the way he wanted it. "I didn't up an' leave because I regret it, I don't. I definitely don't regret it, no, it's just...I'm scared."
But I never know how to start
[ so what man I'll start if
I know, right. It's just sad.
...one spider freakout later, and I'm gonna go with what the virtual dice said and use Suiren. This may or may not fail since she isn't used much.
[ I don't even know who that
crap
uhm
...FUCK
I swear too much uh uhm
is this human or deer |8 ]
[WE WILL, DANNII. Except I'm
Except I'm bad at starting too trololol]
He didn't regret it. He
Martisol probably looked like a wreck. Her hair was in a loose, low ponytail, threatening to fall apart, her long bangs in her face. She was wearing a simple pair of old, faded jeans, a hole torn in one knee, no shoes on her feet below. On her upper body was just a faded lavender button-up shirt with its longer sleeves rolled up to her elbows. She had minimal makeup on, refusing to put on more than just foundation after her shower since she knew she wasn't leaving the house that day.
Scared... Scared of what? That she would regret what happened and push him away? She wanted to reach up and put her hand against his cheek, to tell him that if anyone should be scared, it was her. She had never really been in this situation before, with conflicted emotions. She didn't know how to react properly.
Instead of putting them up to his face, her hands wrapped around herself, hugging her side loosely. Her gaze fell to her feet, which rocked back and forth momentarily as she thought of a way to answer.
"I guess I was scared, too..." She shook her head briefly. You are going to sound absolutely stupid, Martisol. "I was... scared that it had all been some... stupid dream. That none of it was real. Because..." Don't you cry. Don't you dare cry. "... Because I don't regret it either."
Breathing in deeply, she looked back up at him, eyes bright with emotion. "I-I feel so pathetic. I've been sitting here at home, trying to figure out what was going on in my head and..." Her voice faded away and her hands dropped to her sides again. She glanced down once more before her voice returned, her eyes looking up again. "I'm sorry. I... I don't even know what I'm saying. I'm just... So happy to see you." Her voice was quiet, almost hoarse.
[hi I'm just gonna edit this real quick because I'm so picky~]
Track for now; I may start
See, this shows how little I
I guess deer since it'd be easier to figure out situations and locations and such. |D
[ Pega; ALRIGHTY I used the
Cailyn; dsfsdf hello you ;; ♥ that would be wonderful asdf ♥
ocean; god damn it if you pick all the STUFF then I'll start okay because I WANT To RoLEPLAY WITH YoU ignore my broken o key ]
AA
As his nervousness threatened to swallow him whole, he let himself look at her properly for the first time that day, gaze roaming over the imperfections that normally did not exist. He couldn't say he disapproved of the hair; in fact, he was almost certain he preferred it like that, and the lack of makeup was a nice change, too, though she'd never been a plastic girl. But still - her overall appearance was that of a tired, worried woman, and Rutilus did not like to see that kind of woman.
For a moment he wished there was a mirror around - I'm not gay, I'm not gay - for him to check his own appearance in. He knew he looked tired at least; or he assumed so, given that he hadn't slept since he left Martisol's house the night before. His hair was never neat even when he brushed it, so he supposed that would be a mess too, flicking out at the sides near his cheekbones as it usually did when it wasn't brushed at all. And his clothes - had he even changed them? His shirt--yes, he remembered changing his shirt and getting washed, but that was it.
Rutilus wanted to hold the golden gypsy as she wrapped her arms around herself.
The blonde listened carefully as she spoke, his own gaze drifting to the floor rather than staying on Martisol. There was an uncertainty in her voice at first, which was understandable, but then that familiar strength returned - the strength she didn't know she had, the strength she couldn't see and yet behind blue eyes he saw it all the time, radiating from her like starlight, like the sun. Rutilus almost interrupted when she took a breath, but upon looking up he stopped, a deer in headlights when her eyes met hers.
Was she going to cry? He didn't think he could stand seeing her cry. What if he cried, too? Rutilus almost never cried, but for a moment he thought that of all things this might be the trigger for it. Her eyes were the most beautiful, bright shade of emerald, and he was trapped in them, unable to speak or move, barely daring to breath. But she blinked, and his fantasy was ruined, the spell broken. Rutilus focused on the words the golden gypsy was speaking, trying not to become distracted - it wasn't easy, what with him being so tired.
"...Marti," he chuckled softly, unable to help it. Rutilus moved forwards, slow but sure, and took both of her hands in his own much larger ones. He lifted them, pulling her towards him with their entwined fingers against his own chest, head tilted down to look into green irises again. "It's okay, it's okay to--not know what the sodding hell it is you're trying to say."
He exhaled and quickly kissed her forehead, letting go of her hands to push long bangs out of Martisol's face. "I'm not--I'm not good at this," he insisted quietly, and pressed his forehead to the gypsy's again, eyes flicking closed anxiously. "Not good at--at--this, all of this, it's fucked up so many times and--" He still couldn't say the word 'love'. "I don't like the--risks here. That's why I left, I guess."
A weak laugh.
"Now I don't know what the bloody hell I'm sayin', I'm--Christ, I'm sorry."
--------------------------------
...oKAY GUYS I'LL GET BACK To YoU oN THoSE STARTERS BECAUSE THAT LITERALLY TooK LIKE THREE HoURS To TYPE oH MY GoD...
I'm cool with waiting. |D
She couldn't help but smile a
Martisol took a shuddering breath as he kissed her forehead and moved the hair from her face, reacting to his touch. As he leaned forward to put his forehead against hers, she let herself relax somewhat, closing her eyes with his. She listened to his voice, listened to his explanation. She didn't care if he sounded tired or what he looked like, all she wanted was to know that he cared and that he was here, with her.
Yes, she knew how he had been in many relationships before, and had his heart broken numerous times. But she didn't want to hurt him. Ever.
Her smile disappearing briefly, she considered the situation as she basked in their closeness. There had always been a little more to their relationship than just 'friendship'. She knew that. And she knew that they would now have to put their whole lives on the table here, right now, and decide where to go. She didn't want to go back. He was her rock, the sun that she had so long revolved around. She knew there were risks, but could these be risks she was willing to take?
Lips parted to take a deep breath, and she spoke gently. "It's ok.... I'm scared, too. You know I've never been in a... really serious relationship before. I don't know what I'm doing." She let herself laugh quietly as well, trying to keep her emotional self from falling apart.
The laugh ended in another quick breath.
"I just don't want you to leave. I can't lose you, Rutilus. Not now. Not ever." Her voice was desperate now as she tried to get her feelings across. "Especially not now."
[ Pega I...I GIVE UP. /cry
give me time okay
okay
WE WILL RoLEPLAY I SWEAR IT jesus christ ]
AA
The thought of being the first one to ever be this close to her, the first one she would ever trust and love so completely that she would let him be with her, the first one to hold her and kiss her and tell her how god-forsakenly beautiful she was - it made his stomach twist delightedly and his heart start to hammer persistently in his chest, a thrumming bassline that kept him valiantly alive. Rutilus exhaled, feeling as if he was having a strange dream when she started to speak again.
Something he wasn't sure he'd noticed before was how melodic her voice was; soft, gentle, as if the classical era of music had met the tender acoustic guitars of the mid twentieth century. Ah, he knew fine well she didn't know what she was doing, but that was alright; as stated, neither did he. She was doing a better job of this than him, he thought, and he was the one that was supposed to be experienced. But even if he had been any good at relationships before - it had been years now since he'd been in one. Rutilus couldn't remember any one night stands, either.
A weak smile made itself known as she spoke her final lines, and he felt tears prick gently at his eyes. No. No, don't cry. You're a man. Rutilus' breath left him with a quiet half-hearted chuckle and he shook his head, fighting to keep his voice under control, stop it from cracking. He wrapped long arms around the smaller blonde and pressed close to her, face hidden in her hair.
"You won't, you won't," he promised quietly, blue eyes shutting tightly to hold back tears. Do not cry. You've lost your closest friends before and didn't shed a tear. Don't you dare fucking cry. "I won't leave y'." A shuddering intake of breath; Rutilus kissed Martisol's hair twice, feeling himself trembling. "I couldn't leave you." Another pause. Fear turned his guts. "It's jus' that--there are risks, there's so many sodding risks and--what if--fuck, Marti, I--"
And he was babbling.
Fantastic.
Abruptly he hid his face again, chewing on the inside of his cheek to shut himself up, exhaling.
8'D It's ok. Relax. I can be
Strong arms encircled her,
Risks.... he kept insisting. Too many risks? To be with her? Her heart twisted in realization. Yes, there were risks in every direction now. If they decided this was wrong, they would probably never be able to go back to where they were before. If they continued forward, would it ruin what they had? She hoped not. But there was also the possibility that this was meant to be. Was that worth the risks?
She wanted to believe it was right. That it was worth it.
God, are we going too fast? Or has this all been building up too long? A tear escaped one of her eyes. She bit her lip, willing herself to not let another fall.
She shifted a little in his arms, just to tilt her head up so he could hear her. "I understand. I really do." She tightened her hold on him just slightly, taking a gasping breath. "But I... I trust you. We've both screwed up so many times... Yet, we still hang around each other. I don't... I don't know if there's anyone I trust more. Outside of my family, that is."
I trust you with my heart.
After another second or two, a question came to her mind. She relaxed slightly, her curiosity beginning to overcome raw emotion. "But... I have to ask. Why me? I always thought you would end up with someone more... adventurous. Daring. More... spontaneous."
AA He was relieved that she
He was relieved that she returned his embrace, unsure of what he would have done if she hadn't, and he'd been left standing there and clinging to her like an idiot. Martisol inhaled and he heard it, heard the slow tssst as oxygen flooded into her lungs. He wanted to know what she was thinking, every single word, every phrase and every half-thought. Was she as shook up as he was? Probably. Likely she was just better at hiding it than he was.
Martisol shifted, catching his attention; he tilted his head down slightly to hear her better, staring down over her shoulder rather than directly at her. A familiar, crooked smile tugged at the corner of his mouth and he shook his head, strong arms tightening around her again. Rutilus couldn't fathom a response to it, because there was only one thing he wanted to say and yet he still couldn't bring himself to do it, not when his mind still wasn't fully made up.
He wanted her. God, yes, Rutilus wanted her, wanted to be there for her and have the right to kiss her and hold her and make her feel special. He'd make her breakfast in the morning - pancakes, can't cook anything else - and he'd distract her when she tried to cook dinner, hug her waist and say stupid things, pull her into a waltz around the kitchen until she finally batted him away, laughing. He'd crawl into her bed at night and curl around her, and they'd talk for hours without the need for cellphones like they used to.
Fucking hell. Too fast, Rut. She probably don't want you livin' with her just yet, Christ. But he was pulled away from these idealistic thoughts by Martisol as she shifted again; Rutilus kept his arms around her, but this time looked into green eyes, head tilting to the side as the gypsy spoke. The question made him laugh and he pecked her forehead, smiling like an idiot, stomach flipping. Rutilus relaxed, exhaling with a half-chuckle.
"Why you, eh?" He was still smiling despite his attempts not to, blue eyes warm; a tropical ocean again. "I don't--need someone like that. Nah. I've known for--years now that I wanted someone...someone..." White teeth the corner of his lip, gnawing as he thought about it, calm again, thank God. "Someone good. Someone I could trust to keep me right, someone I knew would never hurt anyone, someone that didn't need to be flashy and dangerous to impress me." His arms tightened around her again to pull her closer, head bowing, nose almost against Martisol's neck. "And I need someone that knows me, knows they can trust me."
His voice cracked very slightly; he buried his face in Martisol's hair this time, feeling himself shaking slightly, emotional. "I-I could--I could take care of you, y'know," he insisted quietly, desperately. "You don't think you need takin' care of but--I could be here, an'..." He swallowed, inhaling shakily, silenced again.
His smiling was contagious, a
It was a strange realization, this discovery of love that happened only a day before. She already knew she loved him in some ways, but she had always thought it was more of a sibling-like love, close but not in the least bit romantic, but willing to die for the other. But maybe, that was all due to stubborn refusal to believe she could love someone. She had always been waiting for a prince to come and whisk her away to some happily ever after, yet she never took the time to consider the fact that her prince was right in front of her. Her golden, bright-blue eyed prince charming.
The thought made her feel terrible inside, like a knife being dug into her stomach, but the way he was smiling down at her as he spoke fended the feeling away. That's what she needed. That smile. Those eyes. Someone to make her feel better and to be there when she felt like giving up.
He held her closer now, head bowing over her shoulder. She buried her face in his neck, his messy hair covering her face, longer than it had ever been before but still so familiar. If she was able to hold him like this forever, not afraid to hold back or hide anything, then she would be happy. Endlessly happy.
Martisol couldn't help but grin at his shaky voice, pleading with her, trying to convince her. She found it adorable in a way. In an attempt to comfort him, she nuzzled her face a little more into his neck, hugging him a little tighter and rubbing his back slightly with one hand. What she really wanted to do was caress his face between her hands and reassure him that he was all she wanted right now.
Instead, she moved her head slightly to free her face from his neck, resting the side of her head on his shoulder. Well, I need someone who can make me smile. Someone for me to hold onto when my whole world seems to come crashing down. Someone I know will stand by me, even when everyone else is against it." She suddenly felt her throat tighten again, and she took a gasping breath. "I'm not going to deny it anymore, I need someone. And I know you would do anything for me. And I would do the same for you."
Her voice cracked then. Her eyes closed tightly and she tried to take a couple of breaths to calm herself. "I... I..." She didn't even know what she was trying to say, only that she was afraid she would fall apart if she did.
[ MAN hi sorry this has taken
I just noticed that in my last post I wrote white teeth the corner of his lip lol what ]
AA
A shiver slid down his spine as a delicate hand moved against his spine; he relaxed, calming quickly, and having a small revelation as he did so - Martisol could calm him down. When he had fits of temper, when he wanted to hit everything in sight, when he wanted to take that gun from his bedside cabinet and just shoot something...she'd be there to stop him. She'd be there to keep him from doing things he'd regret, and in return he'd be there to hold her up when she felt like falling. And if she fell, then he'd fall with her; they'd fall together and eventually gather the strength to get the hell back up and keep going.
Those words made his heart skip one, two beats. Th-tha--thadump! Yes, he would do anything for her. Anything at all. You jump, I jump. Rutilus found himself smiling even as he heard her voice crack, as he heard those shuddering, quick breaths. Was she crying? He didn't think so, but he was quite sure she was close to it. There was a long silence in which he gave no verbal response to his gypsy, instead just holding her there, kissing soft hair, right arm around Martisol's waist whilst the hand of his left rested between her shoulderblades, soothing. He wanted to speak. He wasn't sure what to say.
You could always just say it, Rut.
But that was dangerous. He was certain she loved him - no, he knew she loved him - but to give her that confession, to have her hold it in her heart and keep it there...that frightened him. Scared him half to death.
But I need her! I want her!
Rutilus exhaled heavily, breath hitting the skin of Martisol's neck. He shook his head, drawing back slightly, pushing the blonde's hair back from her face, arm sliding away from her waist. He didn't want to be conflicted, but his emotions were a hurricane; one minute he was certain, absoloutely certain that he wanted to be with her, but the next minute, this minute, the doubt came back and he was scared again for all the same reasons that had kept him from confessing earlier than this.
Too late. It's too late. We waited too long.
"I don't know what to--" He cut off, brow furrowing slightly as his throat tightened painfully. Rutilus cleared his throat slightly, having extreme difficulty vocalising his issue, the one thing that was utterly fucking this all up. We could be so happy... He didn't want to ruin it. He didn't want to. She was happy. She looked so happy.
"I don't--wanna rush," Rutilus eventually managed to say, soft, gazing calmly at her - yet with that sad look in his eyes, as if he knew how it was going to play out already. Yet he managed to laugh, shortly, with a small snort. "Yeah, no rushing, he says after waiting years--but, yeah. I--I don't wanna rush you, I don't expect anything from you, I want it but--" An intake of breath. He tried to smile again. Failed. "...I'm not--uh--good at this, but I don't want--I don't want no awkwardness either, and--I want to kiss you again sometimes. If you want. To be kissed, I mean. Yeah."
Ok. |D