(( note :: thoughts, not spoken words ))

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A silken pleasure melts in my mouth. A plum, ever-so-sweet to my delights of the tongue, graces it and clashes down my mouth tube. The fog has lifted away from my eyes in this world, and I feel the cold, dewy simmer of the sun skies, and wonder what could have been.

For when you love someone truly that much, you never can know what will happen. I fell into a ditch and broke my legs and spine, and my tears are broken as they clash on the ground that is the sky above me in my trapped little hole.

This hole is my life, don't you know. Cold as the day is long, and favoring none but the lucky, I...cry...

Oh, Plume...how I wish you could hear me. How I wish you knew how saintly you are towards me...a rainbow of light and colors rained down upon my colorblind heart. And at last I grasp with my teeth, this cloud, this pillow on which my head has rested upon for the silvers and the nights.

But you'll never know because I am cold to you...

Fur damp as dry as day...

My heart beats solely for you. I cry only for you. And I'd die only for you.

But 'til the end of my life or of your own life, I shall keep this secret. Poured into this magic genie bottle and never to come out.

But it is best that way, my love...I shall fall like the angels do. And I shall fall quickly and slowly...

And you shall see the flower grow when I am away...

That day...

So far ago away.

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(( i wonder if anyone knows what her taint is as of yet...it has been clear to me for a long while now... ))

So she forced Anzel-minion to design some sets. So, I present, Taint's idea of what Plume should look like:



x3

Just random ideas. If you ever get bored of your set, swipe on of these XD;;;

((btw - if the beluga pelt seems random...you haven't seen close-ups of the eyes. <3))

....that there are two real deer pelts.

One has belly.

And the other, does not.

*duh*

*duuuuuuuuh*

I never get spellspammed, never see the pelts, never see them side-by-side...why would I notice? x.x

First thing: The servers.

So confusing. I wish I knew what was wrong, and that I was believed. I'm pretty certain that there is a problem between me and the normal server that doesn't exist between me and the back-up server. Not sure what it is, but it exists. Wish I knew what.

Second thing: Dream.

Last night, I had a dream. In it, was a beautiful watercolor painting of a waking Plumeria, whose set, in my dream, was perfect, because it was just close enough to Taint's, but just different enough not to be her. I woke up to realize it was actually Taint's set. Now I'm gonna go set-sneezing to find out if such a set exists, though x3

Third thing: Aspirin.

Argh. I'm afraid. I've got a killer migraine, feels like a brainfreeze that won't go away, two icepicks on the backs of my eyes. My eyes hurt to the touch. My head hurts and pulses. UGH. I want to stop using aspirin/etc. and just wait it out, but it's been hours and hours. It hurts so badly. x.x I hope I only need one dose. I'm sick of taking aspirin. *bad pun*

Fourth thing: ...ugh.

Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh. I can't think straight. x.x

Blue11....Blue12....Blue22...

Who are all of these Blue deer I've seen over time? I have a feeling it's someone who lives close to me...maybe in the US or Canada...because I've seen their pictograms in the forest, and that's why I checked them.

Just curious if anyone might have the slightest clue

Just warning you all...I'm not particularly alright right now.

I am fine, physically, yes...but not emotionally.

If my inquiry is correct...and I do have some type of bipolar disorder, however mild it might be...I'm going through a manic phase.

I've been happy and hyper and such for a while now, Pega and Dannii and such can account for that. And 10 minutes ago...I just became so enraged that I was cussing and tapping keyboard keys with extreme fury (...lol).

I couldn't believe I had been happy then.

Now, the only way I can believe that I was even angry was this faint feeling of heat throughout my limbs o.o;

I'm happy again.

If I snap at you, simply let me calm down. I'm not all me right now. I don't want to lose more friends because of my mood swings. Thanks for understanding...

You can yell at me if you want, btw. This mood seems to be preventing me from tearing up o.o;

I'm gonna be Veinfawn. So fear me.

"Sa...sriah...." came a gentle voice from the mushroom circle, glazed in the light of the eternal morning sunlight, shimmering lightly upon the blossoms nearby and within the skies. "Why does the sun take my heart with a thousand blades....struck down upon me like the everlasting heartache...of a bird, a blue jay, stricken down before me..." Her hums continue as she rolls over a fallen bird, limp to the touch, unlike any other, "All shall end, all shall end but not the dear..."

A faint smile spread upon her face, a butterknife slicing a faint joy, a bliss, upon her lips. Her eyes, eternally squinted in the holy sunlight that beat down upon every being within the land, seemed filled with sand and aching. The bird, lifeless in her hooves' touch, lied helplessly upon the ground.

"Sweet dear..." The bird breathed in and out, and she knew it. She the bird, and she the deerfae. "I let you have this gift...for yours in an incurable...my love for you is that the same as the love I have..." her voice trailed off into her mind, and out again, like breathing, in, and out, she spoke to her, "Sweet bird..."

She kneeled down, kissed the bird gently with the gentlest kiss she could muster, and bit its neck with a crinkle. She tilted her head up, cleaning her lips of the rose red, and sat down beside the bird.

Its form faded away. For, as the falling leaves do as they touch the solid ground, all things dead faded away.

"I am not dead, am I, little bird...?" she spoke, I don't know who I am anymore...

The soft wind captured her furs in a tussle of flying fures.

The fae lied lone, stiff, in the wind she could never feel.

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(( ...my brain itches. *itch* *itch* ))

(first moo's when i restart the game always show up like this - pwn, no?)

Wishing everyone good luck at catching this 2nd Abio, despite time zone differences and recent issues that everyone seems to be having.

Sorry for spamming up the diary area ^^;

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