"I only live to see them live..." ~Emdeaur's Biography~ //OLD BIO NOT UPDATED

E•M•D•E•A•U•R

(please view on a widescreen monitor and with Internet Explorer)

So this is an old biography. New one IS HERE. This one's not updated anymore, but I can't bear to destroy it. So. There's that. ♥

E•M•D•E•A•U•R

is;

-non gender-specific: predominantly male, assumed either
-a romantic
-a terrible grudge-holder
-hazel-eyed
-hermapherodidic (functional male/female contents)
-pansexual
-finds males more physically attractive and females more mentally/emotionally interesting
-adapts well to situations
-can be vengeful
-craves affection and touch
-cannot handle stress well; runs off when overwhelmed
-rarely dominant, but hardly over-submissive
-antlers grow at a constant rate; they do not shed
-antlers are light, do not hold up well in combat
-slightly taller than a 'TEF deer'
-short, fine fur, longer, straight hair over hackles and neck
-viciously protective over anyone he considers 'friend'
-easily jealous
-a poet
-more intelligent than he looks
-claims twin intertwinned birch trees as 'his'
-posessive over the top of the cage in the ruins
-variable, playful, stoic, a watcher, calculating, kind
-combat strategy is mostly will and movement over power
-obsessive nuzzler
-has no defined 'set'
-sometimes a stalker
-claims and makes 'pets' and 'posessions' out of others sometimes

beliefs;

-wordless apologies
-simplistic beauty
-the meaning of names
-loyalty unto death
-fighting for others, not self
-twin gods
-love: all powers of and the strength of those that have

adores;

-does, stags
-colors
-night-time, snow, fog, sunshine
-family, friends, those he loves
-orange
-playful spars
-watching, observing
-snuggling
-the world
-the beauty of the unknown

abhors;

-unnecessary fights
-company when not wanted
-letting others down
-helplessness
-rain
-large crowds
-'sides' in a fight

fears;

-attacks
-being lost
-defenselessness
-losing sight
-forgetting
-stand-offs
-being rushed at
-large crowds

origin;

brought into this world, i was.

given life by my mother, who was not of this forest.
i do not remember her much, but my father, who is called Basil, is of this forest.
my father and i came upon this land by an unknown event.

did we die? is this our heaven?

have we failed at our tasks? is this our prison?

...i will never know.

my father and i are not close; we do not share internal dreams or tell each other stories. we are two different breathing things, alike by only chromosomes. we share blood, not mind.

i set out to build myself my own family. and so i did.

my mother, then, by another unknown event, arrived into this forest. and who am i, her only son, to not welcome her 'home'?

i didn't know what to think.

it was as if everyone was back together again. everyone is back where they belong.

everyone has their place, now.

and nothing makes sense anymore.

i would follow you to battle and die for your cause;

~~Evania - beloved/"Never."~~ (deceased)
Evelys - biological daughter/adores
Capulet - biological son/adores
Basil - biological father/alike in blood, not mind
Miarza - biological mother/honors/respects/loves/unsure
Exit - sister/loves/raised her from fawnhood/extremely protective of
Jorogumo - sister/respects/adores
Ji - niece/loves/playmate
Bénézet - nephew/adores/protective of/playmate
Flail - sister/loves/protective of
Demon - brother/loves/bit of a boycrush
Aleumdaun Misang - sister/adores/protective of
Jax - brother/loves/~~secret lover~~
Caden - nephew/protective of/loves
Kasmir - niece/loves
Hexane - nephew/loves
Aamori - niece/loves
Euriea - niece/loves
Dajhi - loves/doesn't get to see often because of Lucian/good friend
Gustiro - unquestioned love/indebted to/a posession of
Misaki - adores/posession/his
~~Darlene~~ ~~- pet/posession/loves and trusts/good friend~~ (deceased)

i would hear your cry and be at your side;

Lilly - likes/friend
Moonrose - likes/friend
Phoenix - likes/friend
Mikhail - loves/fears it isn't mutual
Spirituelle - adores/good friend
Angel - likes/friend
Mikaela - likes/friend/doesn't see often
Spirit - likes/friend
Buttons - adores/protects/good friend
Oriole - likes/protects/friend
Shineri - likes/good friend
Copolymer - likes/friend
Vitality - likes/friend
Vodun - likes/friend
Lucy - likes/friend
Umay - likes/friend
Vala - likes/friend
Domingo - curious of/unsure of motives/likes regardless
Mr. Zombie - cuddlebuddy/another posession/adores
Kody - likes/friend
Crucio - ?

i cower in your presence, tremble at your words;

Lucian - fears/hates/will run from
Cadaver - unreasonably terrified of/avoids at all cost

forgiveness doesn't always exist;

Jade - dislikes/ignores
Visil - hates/fears
Leviathann - dislikes

there aren't always words for what i worry for;

Daikon - unsure
Illrose - unsure/dislikes
Dinah Moon - unsure/likes
Gehirn - acquaintance/likes
Saosin - respects/likes
Bae - unsure/likes/curious of
Sianna - unsure

•first loves•

my strength • my love • my life • my strength • my hope • my love • my life • my strength • my hope • my love

my life • my strength • my hope • my love • my life • SkyAngel • my strength • my hope • my love • my life

...someone told me once
that true love only happens twice.

the first once is forever...
the second is to fill the empty space.

i will never find a second.
i will never stop willing her home.

because i love you more
than i ever should.

•second chances•

...i thought i had everything figured out
i knew it, i knew it-
i thought i was cursed.
i thought i was never allowed to have what i wanted

but then there was you.
unassuming, unannounced...
you walked into my life,
and played it like a song

that's when i realized;
it's not that i'm cursed,
but that instead of getting what i thought i wanted
i got the only thing i'll ever need:

...