Cupid in Winter

I’ve fallen in love many a time. The Forest seems to be full of life, life of the male identity, yet I still am puzzled by their presence. Am I wrong to leave a doe and stag to sit by themselves, even when it is I who wishes to sit with him? They’ve come and gone, stayed and vanished before my eyes. I leave well, having enjoyed their time with me, but that thought lingers like the last ant into the mound after all the others. Am I his Doe now?
Our time together grows with each encounter, not with just one stag but at the very least three. Maybe another will join this odd pattern. I am treated with respect and love, cherished and protected, but when I see them again in the Forest, I see not me by them. Another doe ahs taken my place. Is It wrong that I do not ask out front why they sit with her and not me? I tell myself that she is instead a sister, a old friend who just wanting someone to sit with. Or perhaps just a random doe that was nice enough to sit by him as he sat alone before I could get to him. I keep telling myself…

But I can’t help but think…that last ant crawling to the mound is trailing slowly, digging deep into my thoughts as I walk away and try not to disturb the two of you in your quiet moment. Are you just being friendly? Is it just me who carries this emotion for you? I can’t help but feel sad at the sight of a doe with you, my eyes green with envy for a moment as I wish I was she. I wish to be the only doe by your side. But it seems with each time we’re together, I can’t help but count he many does who come to your call, see their flashing pelts and classic dance moves. Hear you laugh at what they do. I should be happy. Happy that you’ve found that special someone. Even if it isn’t me. I want to see you happy, see you smile and see the laughter in your eyes like stars on a dark night.

Can you tell me? I know I don’t speak often when we’re together but I would like to know. Seeing you with other does, when I feel I should be your only one…or even let me down easy so I can contain my feelings for you. Too often I’ve seen death follow a broken heart, or worse a living broken soul once they’ve witnessed rejection from they’re so called ‘beloved’. I can handle if you are taken, I would even like to meet her to settle my nerves and put it behind me. Is there another? Am I to see everyone find their match, while I walk this Forest on silent tears?

Too many questions plague me like bees to a pollen full flower, the constant buzzing making my ears ring. I can’t think too much on it, I don’t want to damage what we have. I’ll take anything really. I am very easy to please. A simple nuzzle or comforting touch is enough to last me a day, a week even. But then I am very selfish, possessive might be better word for how I act. I can’t share friends very well, but don’t mind making new ones at the same time. I’m sure you’ve heard this all before, but when I see you happier with her that you are with me…

I won’t bug you anymore, there are enough does already running about the forest looking for their loves, some already finding them at such a young age as fawns. But then again, I won’t mess with the Gods’ plans for them. Or me for that matter. So my dearest stags in my life, just ignore me if I walk away after seeing you sitting with another, I just wish you the happiest of your days and hope that you find the one that deserves you, she will be the luckiest doe in the Forest.

Till we meet again.

March 9, 2010 - 2:06pm — ocean

March 9, 2010 - 6:38pm — Seed

Awww....

Updates (important links)

The Endless Forest

You are a very good

ff I just want to hug her.

Wow, this was from a while

Awww....