I WAS ON A TRIP THROUGH THIS WACKY FOREST, IN SEARCH FOR MY BELOVED SWEET LADY JENNIFER BUT SHE'S NOWHERE, NOT EVEN HAVING THE BEST NIGHT OF HER LIFE IN THE LOG WITH THE OTHER BUGS, SHE USED TO BE A WILD GAL, CRAZY GIRL, BUT NOW SHE'S GONE OFF THE RAILS, OFF THE GRID.
SHE WANTED TO BE A COUNTRY GIRL... BUT I NEVER BELIEVED SHE'D LEAVE LIKE THAT. THAT'S TOUGH.



I WENT IN SEARCH AND MET THIS WILD LOOKING GUY WITH ONE EYE AND A MASSIVE FIGURE. HE TOLD ME TO CHECK BACK INTO MY LOCAL FOREST COMMUNE, SCREAM IT OUT, NEWSPAPERS, MISSING POSTERS, SITTING ONTOP OF GRANNYS COASTERS.
SO I WAS SETTING LETTERS AND MET THIS LADY CALLED "PRETTY WOMANS FROM YOUR CITY TONIGHT."
NOW THATS ONE FREAKY TITLE, ALARMING EVEN. I WAS DISTRAUGHT AND BEGGED FOR HER TO HEAR MY PLEAS FOR HELP, JENNIFER KNEW THOSE KINDS OF GALS, SHE WAS A LADY LOVING LADYBUG, SUPER COOL AND FANCY. SHE EVEN LOOKED LIKE JENNIFERS TYPE, WE KEPT SPEAKING ON A TELEGRAPH, BUT THIS LADY DIDN'T SEEM TO LISTEN TO MY CRIES, ALL SHE CARED ABOUT WAS THE REAL NASTY STUFF< THAT FREAKY STUFF, BUT MY TIME WAS LIMITED.
I BEGGED FOR HELP IF SHE KNEW WHERE ACROSS THE PLANET MY FRIEND JENNIFER HAD GONE, TO GO ONTO THE PLANE WITH ME, TO BOOK THE HOTEL, SHE COULD BRING HER GIRLFRIENDS, BUT THIS LADY FREAKED ME OUT A BIT.

TURNS OUT SHE NEEDED 50 GRAND TO HELP VISIT ME TO THE AIRPORT, I SAT THERE WAITING AFTER PAYING HER MOST MY SAVINGS MEANT FOR FINDING JENNIFER. I WAS GONNA PAY THAT FOR JENNIFERS MEDICAL ASSISTENCE, OH JENNIFER. I"M SO SORRY JENNIFER, I KNOW YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE FINE BUT GAL YOU"LL GET YOURSELF CAUGHT IN A FAN.

THIS FREAKY LADY LIED TO ME, SHE GHOSTED ME BEFORE EVEN HALLOWEEN SEASON, LEFT INTO THE AIR, STOLE MY CASH AND NOW SHE"S OFF.
...I"M DOOMED. I STILL DON"T KNOW WHERE JENNIFER IS.... DONT TRUST THOSE LADIES IN YOUR CITY, THEY"LL LIE TO YOU AND BE SUPER NASTY.