Terminal Apotheosis - this bio has moved!

Xemi's picture
06/03/2016 - BAM

Like the title says, this bio is now on my new account ;v; Crucio insists on me playing him again, so it's that time. It can be found here for those wishing to retrack. If not, that's okay too!

This node won't be used again in the future, but I might keep it for old time's sake. There's a lot of history here - good and bad, and I think it's worth holding onto.

GODDAMNIT, I STILL



GODDAMNIT, I STILL SUCK--
...
....
.....!

ACTUALLY. NO, NO I DON'T. HAHA. HAHHAHAHAHHA. HAAAAAH.
FEAR ME. >8D
<:
Xemi's picture

.. AHXGSJGFKUFJGHSK IT'S

.. AHXGSJGFKUFJGHSK IT'S ADORABLE WHAT KEURFGUKWEJ WHAT EVEN
AAGEJSHFGJSH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJKFJHJSKHJKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALWAHFLAWKHAWKL

/ded

You have me completely

You have me completely addicted to that first song. I've been listening to it on and off for the last few days. ;;
Xemi's picture

;A; GAH me too. I had it on

;A; GAH me too. I had it on repeat for like.. the whole first day I heard it, hehe.
Ashly has such good taste in music. <3 It's Hotblack by Oceanship. The official video is actually really good if you wanted to check it out, I love it. Makes you think, y'know? o.o <3

I saw. Hnnng, I couldn't stop

I saw. Hnnng, I couldn't stop watching it. It goes very well with the music. I wish they'd make way more than they have. 8U
Xemi's picture

Agreed. ;; I need to get

Agreed. ;; I need to get around to listening to some more.. knowing me, if it fits, I may cave and end up adding it in. |D

UNZ UNZ UNZ~





UNZ UNZ UNZ~
<:

^ Levi's skull got stabbed.

^ Levi's skull got stabbed. B|

NO. SHE TORE THROUGH KODYS

NO.
SHE TORE THROUGH KODYS ANTLER.
WHATNAO.
<:

She better go explain to Kody

She better go explain to Kody that he's lost part of his antler, then.


CB

Kody will tear off her skull


Kody will tear off her skull and walk around with it stuck in his antler B|
NICE DECORATION 8D
Xemi's picture

LOL YOU GUYS SUCK &hearts;

LOL YOU GUYS SUCK ♥
wingeddeer's picture

Antlers masked in

Antlers masked in hellfire
That sounds...way awesome <3

Oh,and I hope you don'tmind ^^

An orange stag calmly walked up to Death,the demeanor he now possesed very diffrent from yesterdays mayhem.

"Greetings,Crucio.I..I just came over to tell you...Thank you...Your presence,whenever I was around was comforting..And I hope you do well too."

He gave his adoptive brother a swift nuzzle in gratitude.
(ffff he's a lovebutt)


Xemi's picture

( Yeah it does

( Yeah it does <3 aaah I love it when they blaze like this. And I don't mind at all. )

Crucio eyed the orange stag curiously, with unwavering approval. This was a great improvement from yesterday, and with a quiet hum, a smirk slid onto his face from beneath his mask. He offered his brother a soft nod of acknowledgement, taking a step closer.

"Any time, Phobos," the stag replied calmly, returning the affectionate gesture swiftly with a soft laugh.

"It's what I'm here for. You're my brother; it's my duty and will to help you when the time calls for it, and it certainly has been lately. I'm pleased to see you're all doing better, and slowly but surely making up. If there's anything I can do, I trust you'll make it known to me, hm?" They may not be bound by blood, but the ties were strong.
uwharrie's picture

Nane couldn't believe what

Nane couldn't believe what Crucio wanted of his family.. She had wanted absolutely nothing to do with their arguments and now he was forcing it on them..
"So, you'd make me your enemy over something so trivial? You knew I wanted nothing to do with this.." She tried to look up into his eyes, frustration clear in her green ones.

"You're acting like a child... I can't believe you'd be perfectly fine with hating me over who I put myself around.." Nane was hurt. She just didn't understand how you could disown someone as family and make them your enemy so... easily.
Had she really never meant that much to them? Was she just a pawn in some sick, twisted game?

"Look Crucio, I love you, you're my brother in my heart. You've always been there for me, and you know I was there for you too... Please explain to me why you want to use me..."

OH MY GOODNESS I FINALLY

OH MY GOODNESS I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHERE THE BLOG TITLE LINE COMES FROM.

I WAS LISTENING TO CARNIVAL OF RUST BY POETS OF THE FALL AND THEN I WAS LIKE,

"WHOA. HOLD ON."

AND YEAH.

I FIGURED IT OUT.

ALL BY MYSELF.

/runs away with her spam
Xemi's picture

( LOL WETTER. GOODJOOOBBB 8D

( LOL WETTER. GOODJOOOBBB 8D *slaps a sticker on forehead on the way out* )

"Of course you don't. He pushed it to this. I won't stand being related to anyone who calls that selfish fool brother," Crucio responded calmly, eyes narrowing slightly down at her.

"I'm pushing him from my life. I can't be around you three if you insist on tolerating his insolence. If you truly feel that me protecting you and caring for you in the past was me using you, then maybe you're not the type of individual I should have placed my trust in anyhow. What has he ever done for you, Nane, aside from get in the way and leech onto you and use you all to cower? When has he ever done more than whine and complain to you? Has he ever come to you asking how you feel, or shown concern and respect for your wishes and wellbeing? Hmmph," he spoke more roughly this time, the bottom lid of one eye twitching in irritation.

"I'm pushing away BECAUSE his allies are pawns, and only pawns. If you really want to be used, go throw your lot in with him, then tell me who's acting childish and 'using' you, Nane."



AND ANOTHER THING. I also

AND ANOTHER THING.

I also adore Hotblack. And the music video makes me cry. ;-;

I'm gonna steal your iTunes or something and take all your amazing musics, mkay? xDDDD


Nojk. But what I CAN DO, is add you to my msn if that's okay. :3
Xemi's picture

AAAH YESSS Ashly introduced

AAAH YESSS
Ashly introduced me to Poets of the Fall and showed me the vid to Hotblack. ;A;
I spent probably a good like.. half hour spazzing over that vid at first, haha.

I actually don't have iTunes. |D /anti-mainstream? idk I HAVE A RANDOM MP3 PLAYER

Yesssss please do~ my msn's

May I ask for yours also? Usually it wants to have both contacts add each other. ono It's odd.


Anti-mainstream YES. -dances

Anti-mainstream YES. -dances around badly like the hipster-wannabe she is-

/ahem

Mine is . Because I'm lame and use the same username and stuff for everything. 8| Haha. xDD

OIKR. MSN = MEAN. >.>
uwharrie's picture

With that first sentence,

With that first sentence, Nane looked away from his gaze.. She couldn't understand such hate..

"You never used me in the past, I'm talking about now, this.. You're just stooping down to his level.. This is using us.. Playing us like pawns, hating whoever doesn't do it your way.." Her voice was quiter, her whole body drooping at seeing this side of her brother.

"I'm not veiwing this like that.. Yes, you were there for me more than he ever was.. And I always thought, if it came to it, that I would choose to side with you... But let me tell you this, if Tandem would have asked me to do this, I would have chose you, without a second thought; because I don't like being used... Maybe Tandem has used me before, but I do know it never came down to him either hating me or loving me over a decision." She was close to tears... She didn't want to lose Crucio...

"...I-I just don't know what you expect of me..."
Xemi's picture

I liked iTunes before it was

I liked iTunes before it was cool. 8| /slides glasses on nonchalantly
Mmk, added. ;D yes it is meeaaan. And I use the same user too. This account's just like.. two years old before I switched users, rofl.

Xemi's picture

The stag's gaze didn't

The stag's gaze didn't soften. His posture didn't relax. It was as if her words failed to sway even the slightest emotion from him. Maybe there was no emotion left; not after this. So, he continued to stare down at her, unblinking, with a hard, impartial expression beneath his skeletal mask.

"Would you stop me then if I ever were to chase him off? Tell me this. I will not tolerate him in my sights, there's no debate on that. I don't think I've ever hated someone so much in my entire life, and I've lived hundreds, thousand of years, Nane. Do you understand my disgust in having any ties to him whatsoever? What right does he have to call you sister? How you can you call him your brother, watching what he's been doing?" he murmured, flicking his ears back.

"Tell me; if YOU ran up to Eighteen this very moment and decided to call him your friend - your brother - do you understand how sketchy that would look to us? He could have killed you, he's a predator, a killer, who you spontaneously decided to leech onto. That's pretty damn suspicious. He's been running around the forest rampantly, calling almost everyone he meets 'brother' or 'sister' to try and steal away everyone he possibly can. What ever happened to getting to know someone first? Is there no decency left in this world?" Finally, he began to twitch again, the first hints of jealousy that was well placed.

"Death is a lot of things, Nane, but it's not dishonest. It is what it is; it's a constant, it's guaranteed, it doesn't screw around. Dismay is the one that messes with hearts and brings around misery to all of those around it. I'm far from perfect but he's no angel either. He's emotionally damaging in ways I could not even fathom. If he'd learned to tolerate as I wished to do to begin with, it wouldn't have come to this. If you truly feel this is me using you, however, well. Who am I to change your mind?"




uwharrie's picture

She finally mustered up the

She finally mustered up the courage to look at him again, her gaze both hurt and confused.

"I called him my brother because love comes easy for me.. It's easy for me to love at the slightest reason.. Because when I choose to love it isnt easily swayed or turned dishonest.. I don't just love others for the good things about them, that would be selfish... I understand your hate towards him and I'm not calling you wrong in it, just know I can't hate in that same way.. Fine, chase him away from your sights, that's no issue of mine, that's not my battle..." she paused, starting to feel like she was rambling.

"But would you really call me an enemy for merely loving, for merely showing sympathy to all involved? I love even if it may be one sided, I love because everyone needs it, even if I never get loved back.." She searched his eyes trying to find any emotion in death that wasn't hate and rejection.

"As far as eighteen goes, I would probably never go so far as to attach myself to him.. But don't you dare compare me to Tandem in that, because if I did become Eighteen's friend.. It would only be out of my desperation to help him..."
Xemi's picture

"As far as eighteen goes, I

"As far as eighteen goes, I would probably never go so far as to attach myself to him.. But don't you dare compare me to Tandem in that, because if I did become Eighteen's friend.. It would only be out of my desperation to help him..."

"That's the difference between you and him. He becomes friends for his own selfish reasons. Yours are on the other end of the spectrum.. being selfless. That's something he'll never be. It's worth noting that I wasn't comparing you to him, I was comparing the two situations, Nane," Crucio corrected simply, offering her a silent inquiry as he searched his expression.

After a long pause, the stag's features finally softened, in spite of how he fought to hold them strong.

".. I'd rather call you an enemy than sit by and watch my loved ones get used day in and day out because of the cruelty of my ex-lover."




Corell's picture

Traxie. =D

Traxie. =D <3
Xemi's picture

ouo &hearts; ty~

ouo ♥ ty~
uwharrie's picture

Nane shook her head and

Nane shook her head and sighed, exasperated.. Fed up with the whole sintuation...
"Just tell me what you expect.. do you expect me to hate him? Do you expect me to attack him everytime I see him? Just what exactly are you wanting me to do here?" her voice was sad, almost defeated..

"You're asking me to go against everything I believe in.. I love you, I'm not going to chose Tandem over you.. but what price do you expect me to pay, oh Death?" she sounded ages older than she was when she spoke now.. A pain hit her like she thought she was going to have to sell her soul.
Xemi's picture

Crucio eyed her curiously for

Crucio eyed her curiously for a few moments, giving a soft shake of his head.

"To be entirely honest I was hoping to hear you renounce that title of 'brother' you hold over him, and that's all. If you wanted to call him a friend, fine, but brother.. fuck.. brother.. you're my sister, Nane. If he's your brother, he's my brother as well, and that thought is sickening to me. I won't tell you to do anything. Just don't expect me to go easy on him because of your relationship with him. He's still my enemy," he responded, huffing lightly.

"I'll never understand how you can trust someone so easily, someone who certainly doesn't hold the same love and respect for you as you do for him. Trust is built up over time. He's not done a damn thing for any of you," The stag hissed bitterly, beginning to pace as anxiety started to well up once again.

"I never, NEVER want to see him again. But you.. you, Honey, and Phobos are the closest to family I have. I don't want to leave you, any of you, for any reason, and I KNOW he's trying to drive me away from you three. I just don't know how much longer my sanity can hold up around him. It snapped last night, and it's only a matter of time before it snaps again. I just don't want to end up running you all over if you should try and get between me and him."
uwharrie's picture

Her gaze remained pained.. "I

Her gaze remained pained..
"I never said I trusted him, yes, trust must be earned.. But, for me, love and trust are two completely different things.. My love is... blind... The love I hold doesn't care if it gets anything in return.." she found it hard, trying to explain her philosophies...

"I don't expect anything of you Crucio.. Attack him fine.. I wont get involved unless it comes down to the life of anyone involved... That is one thing I do refuse, I refuse to sit back and watch murder.." that last word sent a horrible chill through her bones.

"Would you give me time? Not a long time.. I just.. need to figure out if I can do this.. Family's always been something I believed was meant to last forever.. I don't yet know if I'm capable of disowning someone...
Xemi's picture

The black eyed her

The black eyed her thoughtfully as she went on speaking. There was a method to her speech that calmed him and soothed his frayed nerves, even if that wasn't necessarily what he wanted at the moment.

"Like me, he can't be killed. He'll go into a state similar to mine if he's injured badly enough, so no, he cannot die. The closest to this fate would be becoming trapped inside Neath's belly for all eternity," Crucio muttered, giving a soft snort at the thought.

In spite of that, his expression went blank once again, and he gave her a single, subtle nod.

"Take all the time in the world you need." It all came down to not wanting to see them hurt by the crow he'd come to loathe so passionately.
uwharrie's picture

She was put to ease slightly

She was put to ease slightly that Tandem couldn't be killed... But sharp pain struck her heart at the thought of anyone being trapped inside of Neath for all eternity.

She had no more words, there was nothing else to be said.
The small gazelle gave him one last stoic look and nod before turning to walk away.
Her own thoughts conflicted against each other now. Her soul fought against her mind.
What was she going to do?...

Kaoori's picture

(psst, your background went

(psst, your background went byebye .. D: *states the obvious, brick'd*)
Xemi's picture

LOLWTF IT WENT KERBOOM /goes

LOLWTF IT WENT KERBOOM
/goes to fix

IT ARE FIXED NOW. /HURRDURR
Kaoori's picture

(No subject)

Xemi's picture

.. LOL WHAT EVEN. WHY YOU DO

.. LOL WHAT EVEN.
WHY YOU DO DIS. ♥ I love you.
Honeyfur's picture

Happy Birthday! 8D

Happy Birthday! 8D <3
I'm working on something for you C8 (wanted it to be a surprise, but I'm not sure if I'll get it done today ^^")
Xemi's picture

ADHGJDFJKF YOU GUYYSSS You

ADHGJDFJKF YOU GUYYSSS
You don't have to do anything for me. >: <3 But thankyou ;u;
Lovelovelove ♥ Lol eww I'm old now. D|
OkamiLugia's picture

BIRTHDAY HUGS

BIRTHDAY HUGS

Xemi's picture

OHMYLORD IT'S VOLDEYMART AND

OHMYLORD IT'S VOLDEYMART AND HE'S TOUCHING ME ASDJHFKDGDJKFGHDFL
COOOOTIIIIIEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS ;U;

Thank you Ooky :'D <3

UMPH UMPH UMPH. ... But Han

UMPH UMPH UMPH.
... But Han isn't 36 yrs old. :C

... yes I did count those. DON'T JUDGE ME.
<:
OkamiLugia's picture

I was right! HE GAVE HER AN

I was right!

HE GAVE HER AN STD -brick'd'- I MEAN PARASITE

Voldemort must congratulate

Okay I'm done now ;3;
Xemi's picture

LOOLLOLLOLOL^ GIT VOLDEYMART

LOOLLOLLOLOL^
GIT VOLDEYMART 'N YER ARSE OFF MAH BIOOOHHH. /gits out the shotgun
OkamiLugia's picture

Well all right Early 8|

Well all right Early 8|

Xemi's picture

-HYPERVENTILATES EVERYWHERE-

-HYPERVENTILATES EVERYWHERE- [8
Kaoori's picture

aww, Voldemort loves you on

aww, Voldemort loves you on your birthday <3
Xemi's picture

LOL 8[ That's scary. &hearts;

LOL 8[ That's scary. ♥

(No subject)

(No subject)

(No subject)