Breathe in the pain and suffering.

Breathe out relief and happiness.

This is the practice of tonglen.



A book I have been reading lately called The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron is one of the first Buddhist books I've been reading. It's a great book, it has some great advice on overcoming suffering and ultimately being a better person. The goal of the book is to help you let go of your problems and come to a balanced nature, where you learn to pray for everyone to be free from suffering - your family, your friends, those neutral to you (people you don't really know), your enemies, and yourself. I've learned quite a bit from this book and wanted to share one of the meditative practices with you. This is only a little about the practice, which is explained very well in Pema Chodron's book.


Tonglen literally means "sending and taking" in Tibetan. It is essentially the practice of taking in the suffering and pain experienced in the world and converting it to peace and happiness. When you inhale, you reflect on what is troubling you, and then you release it, and as you exhale, you reflect on the good things in life. The process helps you realize that everyone suffers, and more importantly, it helps us realize the important things in life that make us happy. We realize that we take things for granted and that there are many pleasures that we enjoy. Then try practicing tonglen for someone close to you, someone who might be going through a difficult time. Breathe in their pains, troubles, suffering, and then breathe out peace and joy to them. Send them the positive thoughts.


When I practice tonglen, I often think of Quad. When I begin to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or depressed, I'll take a deep breath, let my emotions relax, and as I exhale, I think of my fat, silly blackbuck antelope smiling at me or standing by my side. I think about him nuzzling me or telling me that he loves me. It is very powerful for me, and I think if you tried the practice, it is a great idea to think of your own deer or any other character you've created standing there next to you.

Anyway, I hope this is interesting or useful for you. If you'd like to learn more about tonglen or the bodhichitta practices, or just some great ways to be accepting of others and overcoming your own fears, pick up a copy of Pema Chodron's The Places That Scare You.