Present!

shakra i'm following you everywhere

ooo late track n_n

<3 track

I'm so sorry... <3

Thanks for the thoughts and condolences, guys... <3
I brought his ashes home last night. Now he's together with Primrose again... I'm probably going to look into getting them crafted into a glass ornament, or a pendant, so when I move I'll be able to keep them with me.


And a belated thanks for all the tracks. ♥ I'm not too talkative on here but I appreciate them a lot <3

If you have something to tell me, use my page/email, not the game.
Was the fawn I came to keep company yours?

I'm not pretending. I well know the damage I've done to other people on here, the ones who were my friends back then. Nothing I'm doing here would fix it, I'm also aware of it. It's not why I'm here, anyway.
So tell me, what did I do to you, exactly? We never interacted offsite and yet I heard the rumor that I "used you to get at J!n" or something like that. What is it all about?

I'm asking about the rumor you started, specifically. You started it before I did the damage to those people.
Being accused of more, I have the right to know what exactly.

You realize the graveness of the topic. You owe me that answer.

"I well know the damage I've done to other people on here,"
Tell us what you think this damage that you know about it is. In detail. What do you think you did?

"Being accused of more, I have the right to know what exactly."
My account of the events is that you interacted with me in a sexual manner when I was underage, knowing well that I had not turned 18 yet.

Sexual manner=not personally towards me, but my characters, through nsfw art of our characters, conversations about sexual content, and conversations that I would label as flirty. I wrote you when I was 16, and we remained in contact for two years. And we only got closer as the years went on. I loved you, in ways an emotionally immature codependent and extremely hollow girl would.

I remember, when it all was revealed outside of the public, I got told that I was "a victim of online hookup culture." Thank you for that, Ravyn. For anyone who reads this - I initiated. I reciprocated everything. And I don't care how you sort this in your head - in my opinion, it's absolutely vile that a 27-30 years old person did this with a 16-18 years old someone. You do with that information whatever you want. At this point, all I want is for it to be out here. If you've any sense of maturity in you, you know that people at 18 and even in their early 20s can be immature and vulnerable people.

And during those said great revelations, I also found out that you did this to at least one other person, if not in worse ways than with me. It's not my place to give an account of that, however.
"You realize the graveness of the topic. You owe me that answer." - And this - This is just you wanting to know what exactly you're up against. Coward.

When it all went down - I couldn't eat for a week and got to an unhealthy weight due to all of it. And then our connection went on for a few more months, because I couldn't let go. I needed my fix of this old very cool guy that I loved so much. I was obsessed, addicted to the feelings you made me feel. Then - only when technical problems kept us from talking, I cut connection.

I'm not the person anymore that I was back then. But writing, thinking about this still makes me tremble, and in that situation the responsibility fell on you to handle the situation and not fucking interact with someone more than a decade younger than you in any way close to what we did. And I can't help but think about that every time you interact with younger or vulnerable people on here.

(edit: vee. thank you for providing grounds for this conversation on here.
it's sad that it's happening here, and sad that it's happening on the forums at all. But I feel like it's right for everyone to know.)

karame you are so brave for sharing that, thank you

Edit:


For what it's worth, I dont know that I've known about Uit being a pedophile quite as long as some-- but ever since finding out the very sight of his pictogram makes me sick to my stomach. I hate sharing a space with him and I hate knowing that he's befriending more and more new players who don't know what's happened.

Others have been more eloquent than I would like to be.
So all I have to say is I feel betrayed and lied to. I looked up to Uit at one point for his creativity and coding ability. It’s a slap in the face to learn someone you admired is so disgusting. It makes me feel gross for having ever thought otherwise.
Thank fuck it’s finally in the open. I’ll gladly trade the map and all the other neat gadgets for that.

Vee, thank you for bringing this to light. I did not expect this and I feel sad that I have to learn it through here, I feel awful and I miss and worry about some old friends now, I don’t want to assume but I can’t help it after learning this;

Many have said this already, but to Karame, thank you for sharing and being brave, I am sorry that ever happened. Please take care.

Uit, we interacted for days, I enjoyed your company in-game unaware of this and how I can’t do that. If you are still doing this, please stop and seek help. I am fairly new even if I lingered briefly here 6 years ago, and I’ve known you only for a little bit, but Aivilo described what I feel now. Nauseated.

I can’t articulate my words better at the moment.

Edited.

How you can act like you aren't the perpetrator of this 'topic', how you have the audacity to demand anything from anyone here after the things you did, is beyond me. No one owes you shit. I am so grateful you have finally been exposed for the sick individual you are. You say nothing will fix the damage you caused, how about you start making an effort by leaving the community you have abused and never preying on anyone ever again? Instead of ruining this place for the victims you hurt, instead of being a constant reminder of the disgusting shit you did and acting like you did nothing wrong, instead of continuing to groom minors. This place isn't safe as long as you are here.

To those who were hurt by Uitleger, I'll never have the right words to convey how sorry I am for what you have been made to suffer. You don't deserve any of this. Just know that you have the community's full love and support and that you're doing the right thing by exposing him for who he truly is, you are brave and strong ♥ you are saving others from having to go through his abuse.

not one person here owes you anything. you don't get to make demands when it's you who caused the damage. people like you make me hate the world.

to anyone who has been a victim of this, i'm so incredibly sorry and know that we're all here for you. this should be your place to enjoy and have a nice time in, and not some sick fuck's who goes after children. you did nothing wrong and i'm glad this was brought to light.

nothing to add that hasn’t already been said multiple times, but wanting to give out my support for those that were targeted by a predator who has no place in this community.. im glad this was all brought to light so that maybe any further predatory attempts will not be successful, at least here. I can only fear to think what else may have happened elsewhere or offline

No one wants you here, pedo. Get gone and stay gone.

I was 14 when this man and I first started talking. As is the case with Karame, you could argue I was the one initially pursuing a friendship with him - and you wouldn't be wrong - but what's important here is that this man was 25 years old. He knew that I was 14 - as if that wasn't enough, I'm also on the autistic spectrum, something that affected me deeply at the time, to the effect of my mental and developmental level being below that of an average 14 year old. I communicated openly about my age and my disability - and even if I hadn't, there is no way a man his age could have possibly missed the sheer amount of immaturity and insecurity I used to be abundant with.

None of this had restricted him from maintaining the relationship for years, and I have evidence, from the time I was 15 (and, not impossibly, earlier), of him making inappropriate sexual comments, which included a rape implication, towards my characters, especially my sona/self insert/OOC. He's done this knowing full well I used to be repelled and disgusted by sexuality and romance - same went for my characters - something that I now know was one of the early signs of dysphoria, and he didn't forget to comment how my character was "pure", despite them being no stranger to cruelty and violence, just because they were sex-repulsed.

The gap of age, life experience, intelligence, verbal fluency (besides, this was way before I'd master my English) and communication skills was so wide there was simply no foundation for an equal, healthy friendship. I was perceived as young, naive, stupid, and female, which made for an ideal (and, not impossibly, attractive) target. His popularity with mutual friends at the time, his popularity on the community site, the admiration he got for his artwork - those were the chief weapon in his arsenal and the culprit of my younger self's fear of conflict and asserting discomfort. I couldn't just start shit with him, could I? And how could I have known I was even justified in feeling uncomfortable and not making shit up, as society has so often taught me I'd been? Those were my thoughts at the time.

Look up love bombing and intermittent reinforcement, everyone. Predators are good at their little games, but the code can be cracked. Many thanks to fellow survivors for informing me (not that uncommon for a person in my place to not realize they've been wronged and can defend themselves), speaking out, and to the community and the mod team for having our backs. I love y'all. Stay safe, treat yourselves, and look after your friends, everyone. <3

Edit: I also want to add that this man made a comment sexualizing me - his image of me, which couldn't be further from the truth - asking me if I'd "tear off my clothes" under a given circumstance. Deplorable.

I feel completely disgusted and bewildered by all this exposure of someone I naively 'admired', not even knowing the terrible things other people have gone through at their hands. It makes me sick to think that when we first interacted, I was underage and that this could have happened to me.

I won't be capable to express how sorry I am for those who fell victim of this man, that even forgiveness cannot be accepted in the face of something so cloying and nauseating. May the strength and courage that Karame had in revealing something so sensitive be a refuge for others who, unfortunately, know that they are not alone, and that they have the support of the community.

double comment, sorry.

Uitleger-


So you "never had the capacity" to acknowledge or address what you did to your victims, but as soon as someone makes you feel insulted you suddenly have the capacity to start a public feud on Vee's personal blog to defend your name? And with that same self-serving attitude, you're telling us that you decided to return to the forest after two years, to remain here, because you needed it for your healing and your own peace of mind - still without ever bothering to offer even a shred of closure for your victims?

You're not glad people are speaking about this, Uitleger, you don't give a fuck and were merely caught in the act, but nice attempt to save face there after trying to dismiss the topic in favor of a supposed rumor against you: a 'rumor' that grossly pales in comparison to what you did to countless innocent people. If the voices of your victims were so important to you, you would have addressed this a long time ago yourself. You would not have come back if their feelings mattered to you at all and you would not have scared them into silence.

You don't get to say you know the damage. You will never know what it is like to suffer the years of pain you caused these people, or the years it may still take for them to fully recover. You will never come close to understanding the damage you have caused, especially not when you have taken zero responsibility for any of it.

As others have said already, you need to leave and never come back. If you want to do right by the people you hurt, leave. You made your bed, lie in it. There are plenty of other ways to be a better person that doesn't involve haunting your victims in the same community you destroyed for them.

--

trmnlsystm, you are completely right in his methods of lovebombing. When I first found out about what he's been doing, everything made sense and I wish I realized sooner. All the artwork, his eager attraction to 'hi I'm new, I need help' posts clearly written by minors or artwork drawn by them, always the young and vulnerable seeking help and friendship. It's disgusting and I'm so sad to learn just how many he has hurt and for so long, to learn that he is why some of you left the community, but I'm glad you (all of you) finally feel safe enough to speak up. I really hope you can heal from this with time, you aren't alone.

Is that what they call DARVO? seriously, the fact that Uitleger thinks it's better to stay here is despicable and mindblowing

Thank you to the other victims that has come forward too, I am so sorry you've had this happen to you - this goes for those who haven't spoken up as well of course <3

Just adding my voice for support. I've ignored your existence in this community for years and I should have done more than that. You have no place here.

Stop trying to defend yourself, it's not going to work.

We don't want you here anymore. You're not welcome here anymore.