May 16th, 2016

Didn't have the chance to even awaken from the conk in the head thanks to the Brag, so when the sphere that released a blue colored gas within her isolation cell, there was little to worry about in terms of a sudden escape.

Was placed on a cart by the Elyrian Guards and was taken to the Grand Hall where Dione was waiting for an audience with the Royals. Having been completely knocked out by the gas, the horned doe was left dreaming, but the gas wore off enough to enable her to awaken somewhat. Called for Dione, of course, as the woman was exactly who she wanted to see, and seeing her there only filled her with confidence. She didn't yet notice the Royals had walked in and taken their places.

The ghost of a woman did come close and lowered herself to where Sonali could see her better. She was hushed and told that the woman was going to do all she can. Jyoti had been brought in around this time, though Sonali didn't notice him yet. His leg had been chained in such a way to disallow movement other than walking. And he was muzzled.

Now of course, she noticed her brother. In a very pitiful attempt to stand, she nearly fell off the cart (which she kinda did), barely catching herself on all four hooves. She had called his name twice, nothing else existing, not even the sword that had barred her from him until Dione motioned to the Guard to allow her to approach her brother.

Sonali pressed herself against her brother, her tunnel vision fading out just in time to hear the reply to Dione having said who they were, and that bringing them there meant Leia's life would be spared. Sonali of course, didn't hear that part. All she heard, from King James, that their mother's life would be spared. But in turn that meant that she and Jyoti would be executed the next day, at noon, in the square. Jyoti, during this time, had moved to cradle her with his head (it isn't really hard considering the ridiculous size differences).

Before Sonali could even begin to plead her case, Dione does so. Asking for another punishment for them as they were just children. While it wasn't exactly true, Sonali wasn't going to argue. Anything was better than dying... But she was brushed off, as his word was final and that was what the kingdom wanted. Their deaths.

Of course Sonali was never the type to let things be, especially something that meant life and death for herself and her brother. The large room gave her enough time to call out her own plea, which basically consisted of "this is a misunderstanding!" and "Please hear our side of the story!" Jyoti was trying to as well, thrashing in the chains and trying to bleat through the muzzle, but he stopped when she had spoken for them. She even went so far as to groveling, something only saved for the Twins in the forest when she needed their gift of magic. Jyoti had stepped over her protectively, and she could barely hear his subtle growling.

The response was not what Sonali wanted to hear, but it made the reality of everything that more hopeless. This King wouldn't go against his Kingdom, for it was they who had decided their fate. begging to the King and Queen did nothing. But that didn't stop the girl from trying again, even if she knew it wouldn't work. She had stood, shaking from the effort, screeching that her rebirth wasn't meant to cause any harm. Begged for them to at least spare Jyoti, because how was he supposed to know? She was the one dead and brought back. If they wanted her dead, then at least spare her brother. Of course just ended up crying, unable to think of the pain her mothers were going to go through. To lose two children forever. Her only solace was that her White Mother, Leia, was safe.

As Jyoti tried to keep her back, so did Dione. Ghostly hands forming solid as the Oracle pleaded for Sonali to calm down, and that she would do all she could to make sure the execution didn't happen. That she would fix this. Did of course calm some, but wasn't particularly moved as her first plea failed miserably. But more respect was given when Dione ordered them to either be housed together or side by side. It was the least the Oracle could have done with her power and Sonali was thankful, which was voiced tearfully and with a squeak of a broken voice. Throughout these few moments, Sonali had once again lost energy to move, so the Guards hoisted her back onto the cart to be wheeled back to her prison.

Back at the prison, and sharing a gloomy cell, the duo curled around each other for their last night alive. At least they had each other. Neither brother or sister would be sleeping tonight.

May 15th, 2016

Spent most of the day on the Playground overlooking her brothers Den. Let her guard down, essentially.

Met a creature by the name of Laidli, and had a decent enough conversation until the other told her to be scared and, wouldn't you know it, admitted to killing her brother. RED FLAG. ALERT ALERT.

Stayed calm though, even while saying she would gouge out the others heart and deliver it to her mother. It seemed like the other wanted her to fight, which in turn made Sonali kinda nervous. But if she had to fight she would, she had some tricks up her sleeve. But before things could get really heated, met the Brag who interrupted their argument. Conversed with, in her opinion, the more sane of the duo and ultimately agreed to go speak to Dione, which was what she wanted anyway so it was a win-win. Still though, couldn't be sure she wouldn't end up dead and had the world crashing in on her as she sat there being guarded by the Elyrian guards. Kept herself still to keep herself from trembling, reality almost too much to bear. If she was killed, her mothers would have to deal with yet another child dead.

She might have been able to fend off one, but two was a bit too much for an underskilled doe. Alas, the time came to leave. Was told to follow and obeyed without a word as she followed the Brag, tailed by the Worm. Into the birch they went and when they stopped, the Brag moved out of view to allow Sonali to view the portal come to fruition. Felt herself beginning to regret this, a few tears coming to her eyes but that was where everything went black. Was kicked in the back of the head and lost consciousness, shedding the welled up tears.

May 13th, 2016

Found a Circe and curled up into her sister. Really missed the times where the two of them would spoon as kids, like the time they first met their white mother in their Dreamworld. How could she forget a day like that?

Dozed off for some time, coming to to notice Niki really close by. Scrounged up some courage and went to talk to him. Was able to have a conversation but as usual, something she said pissed him off. When he left, went back to curl herself into Circe until TEF decided to break and shit ugh. And then returned home for sleep.

May 10th, 2016

After speaking with their mother about their grim findings within the Forest, Circe reluctantly gives herself the few days' time she knows she needs to manage her own feelings before giving her sister the terrible news, in what she hopes would be a less traumatic way. Always keeping an ear, eyes, or, occasionally, her nose tuned into the smaller hybrid's activity in the jungle, and occasionally attempting to get close enough to bolster Sonali's healing efforts, Circe keeps an almost protective, however silent, vigil on the Winged in the short time before she's able to approach.

But she doesn't hold unrealistic expectations for herself, and after several days she knows things will not get any better. Sonali deserved to know as soon as she or Shahla were able to tell her, and so with the limited distraction of a few tasks in the morning, she sets out to find the other female.

From Sonali's recent travels and the generous gifts she'd bestowed upon their family since her resurrection, Circe didn't doubt that the Golden had resources now that far outnumbered that of the tiger family, with the exceptions perhaps of their half-brothers and Tsabhi. Still, Circe approaches with light feet and a small collection of rainforest treasures - orchid buds, monkey skeletons, cocoa beans, and beetles shells, wrapped in broad, glossy leaves and the straying thought that, for what she came bearing the second-born today, such small comforts would be next to meaningless. Her remaining Elyrian candies from when they were fawns are also carefully bundled in a few vines and fronds, tucked within the larger parcel. Preserved with a young but raw form of magic that had refused to let the precious items see decay and, she hopes, might bring something in the form of nostalgia and comforting, bittersweet memories to the tabby-colored girl.

For now, however, all items are pushed aside, gently set in a bed of grass before approaching the Golden when it seems as if she is gathering her own assortment of items. Circe's ears flatten repentfully, and with a faint,underlying nervousness in her voice she calls out to her sister.

"Nali?"


Sonali hadn't intended on staying in her Grandmothers jungle for so long, but the nostalgia had been to great, and the meals she could catch herself far exceeded those she could muster within the Forest. Here she could hunt in a more proper form, that of a tiger, without any feelings of reluctance due to her more cervine physique. Here she didn't feel bad about eating the wild boars, elks or other variety of cervine, the larger beasts able to fill her with just a single kill rather than numerous smaller ones she had grown used to. Nothing was wasted.

In a small burrow she had made, there were numerous bones and pelts, an odd collection of teeth and feathers and even some uprooted plants she had planned on growing by her new home. Although preferring meat, fruits were like a dessert of sorts, her favorite, she discovered being the elusive coconut. Today she was pushing a couple of coconuts she had found towards the burrow, but not quite inside as today was the day she planned on going back. She was aware of her families presence in the jungle, but she chose to stay away simply because she needed to heal (and actually have a decent meal for once), and she didn't want to be a burden. With the approach of her sister, the small tigress turned with gleaming gold eyes. The transition from tiger to her born form was quick and painless, the facade melting away like the suns rays of rippling water. Atop her crown were two curved horns similar to an impala's but with two extra tines on each. Like herself, they were delicate and gold. They had finished growing, finally, and Sonali was pleased to consider herself a young adult though did not say so verbally.

"Circe." The doe speaks gently, standing in a bit of sunlight that melded her wings with the sun shafts. She noted the slight nervousness, but her own happiness to see the Elyrian pushed the worry away from her thoughts. "It's nice to see you." A gentle smile graced her lips as she took a few steps closer, but allowing her sister her space should the girl wish for it. "I was just about to head back home. I forgot how plentiful this jungle was." Head raised, taking in a deep breath to relish the scent of this place. "I feel much better." Eyes lowered to focus on her sister again. "How are you, sister?" A tilt of the head was given before silence followed.


Pale gold eyes trace the smaller witch's form with latent concern, no matter how disjointed it seems to be, given Circe's fragmented state of mind. The haunted look in the larger hybrid's eyes is banished with each, willful blink the adolescent takes as she steps forward upon hearing her name from the other's mouth.

Noting Sonali seems physically sound is a small consolation, when taken with the other's poor emotional state lately, but she takes such comfort where she can, even if she knows it will be short lived. Her gaze momentarily falters at the female's effusive greeting, responding with a small, half-flick of her tail in the air behind her before she chances a look back up at the other with a hunter's focus. Far from ignoring Sonali's question, the middle child can't speak as to her own well-being for many reasons, not least of which is to risk burdening the smaller one any further. If she could, she would spare her this whole conversation to begin with - Circe knows that as it is, meeting the other hybrid's eyes, Sonali may be able to read it on her features that she is not well. Has not been well.

"It's Jyoti," she says softly, ears turning downward, as if to apologize that the other's improvement will surely be short lived as well. Her eyes gleam oddly as they study Sonali, before the rest spills from her lips. "He's... gone, and," her eyes lower, "I don't know if he'll be back. Able to come back, this time." She's vague on purpose, wanting to spare the Golden both of the imagery and uncertainty that she and Shahla had been met with when they discovered traces of his blood, and also not to elaborate on why he might not be able to return, this time, if the worst had truly come to pass.

"I am so sorry."


The brushed off nervousness resurfaces, the smile that crossed her lips fading ever so slightly and with more concern. The whole family having their own issues was not foreign on Sonali, though the Golden had to tend to her own mental state many a time simply because she wasn't entirely sure how to go about it at first. But now, seeing her sister step closer, Sonali felt that lingering nervousness as well as something deeper and more distraught. Circe had been, at least to Sonali, the most calm of the siblings even if she happened to be the most feisty. The smiling fading fully, the Golden kept ehr glowing gaze upon her sister as her heart rate began to pick up. At the mention of their brother, heart paused, then began at a renewed speed. Sonali had been certain that another attack was eminent, but not so soon after Nikhil's explosion. She had wanted to give the Incendiary time to cool down, literally, before she talked to him and hopefully could better understand his feelings and her own. And of course apologize for the consequences of her insecurities. She had hoped, in some small way, that Niki would offer at the very least his presence when the Elyrian guards came again, because the Scintillating had already settled on fighting back. She was certain she and her brother did nothing wrong and that all of this was a huge misunderstanding. If fighting back brought Dione out of the woodwork, whom she had trusted to help them solve this mess...if only the girl knew the true story.

With her mind reeling, the doe stood stock still as if the words were a spell cast to turn her to stone. Part of her wanted to melt into tears and tear herself apart for, once again, failing to protect her brother. Niki's condescending words pounded in her ears before she shook her head and thus, shaking his voice from her mind. "No." Despite her inner turmoil, her voice was strong and lacked the trembling that threatened to rise in her throat. "He'll come back. And you have /nothing/ to be sorry for." The girl said it more for her sister than herself, as she was quite confident Jyoti would return...somehow. He had brought her back with Kitai's help and Leia had brought him back. Part of her wanted to try to bring him back but she was very sure she'd end up just killing herself; that was not what her magic was meant for, at least when used by herself. Eyes had fallen to the sun dappled ground, before rising to meet her sisters again. "He will come back, Circe." No tears, no trembling, just a strange confidence that even Sonali herself was surprised about. A few paces were taken towards her sister, and a gentle touch from a pink nose was offered to the others cheek. Even if Circe did not truly want it, Sonali felt the need to give her sister some form of affection that wasn't just a shoulder bump. "I love you Circe. I'll protect us." Or she'd die trying. Turning, she moved back to her spoils in time to see eyes of an unknown tiger in the distance, just what she needed. A flash of white from her 'wings' and a moment later stood Sonali as a tiger again. She was stronger in this form, so she could return to her glade with her prize before she would take to the forest.


Throughout the small silence that feels like an eternity following her words, the younger hybrid's body tenses as well, as if responding--perhaps reliving-- her own moments of grief, as private and singular as they had felt. There's a moment where the same focus from before has her briefly, but almost blindingly, aware of the other's pain and anguish. Unfortunately, many of her first or would-be responses are cut off by an inner, conditioned response to suppress her true feelings when in her littermates' presence causing an overall feeling of confusion and discomfort. Subtly, short fur stands on end as the Golden's attention, and the focus of the conversation, is unexpectedly thrown back to Circe, with the smaller hybrid stepping closer and pressing into her space. She doesn't know Sonali's inner thoughts but the response surprises her, to say the least, with words leaving her mouth almost before she realizes.

"I am so very sorry, sister," she says again, slowly, sniffing and turning her head into the golden-striped's neck for the time during which Sonali stays there. "I know you'll protect us. Long as we have you, I know all will be well." Soon, the older is turning away and shapeshifting into their grandmother's shape again, and Circe takes the cue to take a few steps back, out of a sense of respect for the more primal form.

"I.. brought you some things. I hope they can make you feel better," she'd say, pausing over the leap-wrapped bundle to look over her shoulder at the transformed female. "I love you, ever so much. Thank you for being here." Pausing she'd wait, patiently, to see if Sonali had anything more to say before she'd move off--only a small ways, to give her silent company until the golden would move off on her own time.


Sonali did in fact breathe in her sisters scent for the moments they were close, memories of their fawn-cubhood coming back to her, but it was only now that she was a distance away that the apologies really seemed to sink in. Was it an apology for after her rebirth? She didn't feel like she deserved an apology really, considering Sonali was ever forgiving even if there was nothing to really forgive. Family always came first in her eyes, even if she sometimes had trouble expressing it.

As she was gathering her things, mulling over her sisters words and tone, Circe spoke again. The Golden turned to peer at her sister, her ears lowering. What did she ever do to deserve gifts at a time like this? Padding over slowly, gold eyes caught sight of the bundle. She could just faintly smell what was inside, but one thing in particular did offer some solace that had yet to be quelled; the candy. She knew it's smell and taste even without being so close, knowing that it came from Elyria. She swallowed thickly, her mind set on her White Mother as it had done since her rebirth. Part of her truly felt like she didn't deserve it, but oh how she wanted it. "Thank you, Circe. I will cherish this with my whole heart." The paw, hardly large, moved to grasp the bundle and caress it as if it were more precious than it's physical worth may have been. Eyes rose once again to her sister, and she dipped her head. "Once everything is over, I will show you my new home. It's not far from the forest, but it's hidden...you will always be welcome there. But I must go drop everything off and return to the Forest. They will need to know I'm not afraid of them. I will see you soon, sister." One more loving glance is given to her sister before Sonali picks up the bundle and moves over to her own stash. She makes quick work to gather everything, and although very overburdened, the tigress moves with a haste to her destination.


It took Sonali a couple of hours to get out of the Jungle and back into the Edge of the Forest. Upon reaching her den, the candies were placed by Adayti's hoofprint, and the other items were stored in the neighboring trees before the Tigress shifted back to cervine and made her way home. Where she belonged.

Back in the forest. Sat by Jyoti's den and was joined by Abby, which prompted conversation. Told the Hybrid herb plans and not to worry as she had it handled. Did have periods of self-loathing when she remembered Tor, who had apparently left. But apparently it was someone he knew so that was ok. A little while later Abby had to leave, and was instead joined by Elliot. Had a conversation with the male, learning he was around to help Jyoti and seemed very self-loathing over the fact he couldn't save Jyoti. Reassured the male that her brother knew what he was doing. Had some more conversation about different worlds, what elves were, Oblivion, explaining the Dreamworld, and some other things. Eventually left to her glade to sleep.

April 28th, 2016

Today, returned to the forest feeling much better, though definitely prone to headaches. The threat of dying via concussion is over, but being jostled or running causes some distress. Still achy all over, opted to go sit at her preferred tree because she scented Niki near by. Didn't want to give her brother a reason to be upset, so settled for the best of both worlds where she would be close to the family but far enough to give him space should he join them. However, she had barely put her butt on the ground when her mother came over. Quickly got on her hooves and exchanged sniffs, and was promptly asked to follow. Felt ice hit her gut, thinking about Niki, but in her mind, her mother WANTED her to come closer, so obliged.

Followed the Tigress to the den, feeling herself take immediate comfort in the familiarity of the area. Exchanged greetings and even a nuzzle when Kio got up, feeling more and more at peace. Sat down when invited to, and found herself surprised when Shahla moved around and sat close. Extremely torn with her emotions, with feeling hella freaking happy to be this close to her Universe, but at the same time, sad that Niki would certainly see this as a threat or something. Honestly just wanted to have a conversation with her brother to clear the air between them. Had hoped for it the other day but....

All in all can't really blame her brother. If Niki has such deep rooted fear for losing family, Sonali sympathizes with him and even knows the familiar pang. Perhaps she doesn't go to such extremes BUT, everyone deals with their emotions differently. Which was something she wanted to talk about too because...when she had tried to kill herself it was completely random and brought on by an explosion of emotions within herself. She was, is, extremely grateful for Niki's words and it pained her to know her conversation with their mother was a sort of betrayal, but at the very least she knows different now. All of the siblings had their trials.

She'd keep trying, just as she promised Shard. Though she hoped today wouldn't be seen as breaking the promise, since the girl was still recovering herself and it was still very soon after Niki's attack, she didn't want to provoke him.

Spent all day with her mother, though fell asleep through half of it. Despite her thoughts lingering on Niki, was so calm with the familiarity that she just dozed off. Roused at some point with her mother a few feet away, but figured someone must have come around so shrugged it off. After a bit (aka a few hours), crept closer to curl up next to her mother again (because Sonali is hungry for your love Sha ).

April 27th, 2016

At her Glade recovering. AKA Soli was at work all day and couldn't be arsed to log onto TEF so opted for playing Sims 3 e.e

April 26th, 2016

Mostly hung around family. Still very much out of sorts, but recovering from the concussion. Although groggy, aware of Circe's closeness and although didn't say anything about it, greatly appreciated being so close to her sister.

Later that night, returned to her glade to rest some more.

April 25th, 2016

All that matters today is that Mom nuzzled her.

April 24th, 2016

Joined Jyoti at a tree, which was farther than her favored one, but felt like she should spend some time with him especially since her mood had lifted considerably. Just snuggled into his side, not saying anything, just silently hoping to let him know she was there for him.

Snuggled against her brother for some time, still unsure why he picked this tree as it was similar to the one she had initially buried him at, with vines and leaves along the bottom. Also at sometime during the day, noted Nikhil nearby. Glancing to see him watching them, wondering to herself if maybe he wanted to talk to her again. Their last conversation was horrible, but perhaps he would have something nicer to say this time? She'd obviously try to apologize again if given the chance, but she was done trying to put him on a higher pedestal than the rest of the family (aside from Shahla who was, to her, the most important of all). Appeasing him wasn't working, so she'd try to appease everyone else. With that said, would of course try her best if he was willing to as well. Would rather forget the past than keep the bad memories going. Was a bit unnerved by his constant staring, but chalked it up that maybe it was he who was nervous of approaching them? Couldn't really fault him for it, considering the tensions between them all, but also hoped he would just...come talk and stop staring because when you're Sonali's size staring does get a little intimidating after a while.

And then Jyoti stood, so stood too. Maybe...he's gonna initiate the conversation? Just really all sorts of awkward :/ Mostly just...nervously questioned them both, noting the tension but trying to make the best of it. Then Niki made it look like he was going to just go past them and go back home, just sorta watched him curiously. Kinda felt bad if he was because...really would rather have this all work out.

But then he charged around a tree and was promptly punted a few yard away from Jyoti. Got the wind knocked out of her more than anything (though she did fall on her head...), but scrambled to her hooves to see the two of them duking it out. Just started screaming at the both of them to stop, which ultimately lead to getting Niki's attention. Wasn't...scared? But was? Wanted to just reason with him and try to understand what was going on in his head but only got tines raking her flesh instead. Bolted off before the horns could do horrible damage, tailed by the Incendiary before he switched targets to Jyoti again. Realized she had garnered Adayti's attention, trembling more from adrenaline than fear, but still horribly upset that the whole event was even taking place. Was reassured by the oryx with a nuzzle, though couldn't return it with her brothers still in the heat of the moment. Charging back to the fight only meant watching her brothers attack each other, and scream for them to stop and have Shard whirl past. Created a hill to see Shard seemingly trying to keep Niki from going at Jyoti, and there was a Gabe and Mom. Wanted to see if something would come from this, seeing Niki stomping around and looking all sorts of pissed off. Felt...really shitty honestly, especially when she was charged by her older brothers which lead to Mom and Gabe intercepting. Not sure if Shard spat at her or Gabe or Mom or Adayti when Niki ran off (Jyoti had by then gone to his den), but felt like the wedge between the family was driven deeper. Unintentionally ran from Adayti when Mom went to check on Jyoti, going over to stand there to figure out if her brother is okay and how badly this is going to hurt their relationship.

But standing there only made the adrenaline pump out of her system and was quickly replaced with her body hurting literally everywhere. Just laid down where she was standing to clean her wounds, but finding her sides hurt ALOT so mostly just laid there. Hated herself for not initiating a conversation sooner..

Briefly heard what was going on between mother and son, finding herself a bit drowsy, and with a throbbing headache. Saddened from her brothers words, but ultimately happy when their mother left and returned with the desired poppies. Aware of Shard's proximity behind her, too weak in the knees to get up so hoping he wouldn't come over and stomp her into the dirt. But he left, as it seemed he wanted to speak to their mother, so just kept low and fawn-like in the grass. Did crawl over to Jyoti after a bit when Mom left and didn't come back and Shard was gone. Pressed against his side, to both give and get comfort.

Adayti returned and offered to help and gladly accepted it because the tine injuries on her rump stung like hell. But no sooner had she finished, Shard started lingering again. His constant pacing and staring made her even more anxious, as it was very similar to how Niki acted before he launched his attack. But soon enough the Nightling was speaking. Didn't agree with Shard, doesn't think that attacking anyone no matter how angry you are is a good idea, (unless of course they were a danger and started it but you know what she means!) Retorted that they were trying to forget the past and that it would be best if they all at least tried to get along. Anger only bred more anger. Also tried to reassure the Pale Tiger that she and Jyoti would not retaliate. Honestly wouldn't think about attacking Niki, even after this. Understands that he is...unstable at the moment. And being unstable meant he needed help. Knows that she and Jyoti won't provide the help but...if the male could get over the past it would be a start. Jyoti simply said an apology, and while feeling she should add to it, didn't.

Was quickly torn apart by Shard, or what could have been perceived as an attempt, kinda shrugged it off this time around. Tried to get the Pale to see that their distance was for their sake, and that they didn't approach so that it didn't seem intruding. Wanted to give them respect, as well as Niki's children (because she doesn't know the kids are also Shards). Tried to assure them that despite what they thought, they did care about them, that they were trying. Kinda got teared up at that point. Almost made a point to say they weren't trying to take away the family and that they wanted to be with them as much as the two brothers did. And added that they wanted to be with brothers as well and stood by that as fact even after all of this. Jyoti didn't comment, though looked rather submissive towards Niki who had been standing near by.

Was pretty much put down again, once again reminded her tactics were failing (at least thats her perspective). Didn't block out his words, but was growing more groggy as time went on. Explained how the talk with Shahla was from her perspective and how she didn't know what had happened prior. She only knew what she saw. Also went on to explain that she would keep trying, despite saying screw it the night before, but allowing them their peace at their home. If she saw them away from their den, then she would approach. Jyoti kept nudging her to keep her awake too. Was asked why she said it, and only replied with his own words: 'fear is illogical', and then finished her side of the conversation saying she still loved them both despite what had happened today. And then Shard left without another word. Just lay slumped against the ground.

April 23rd, 2016

Mostly just hung out by her favored tree close to the family home. Was visited by Adayti at one point, but the oryx left only to be replaced by mom. More happy feelings. Sat in silence, but quite literally didn't care about the silence, just happy for her mothers close proximity.

April 22nd, 2016

Felt pretty damn good since the conversation with her mother. Upon getting to the forest, sought out Jyoti to talk to him, and found him with Circe and Tor. Felt really shitty for interrupting, but needed to speak to Jyoti before anything else happened.

When her brother got up and approached, was quick to tell him what the Tigress relayed to her regarding giving themselves up to the Elyrians. Told him that they would fight back and would find another way to save their white mother. Also tried to reassure him with some headbutts against his chest that she was fierce and awesome and /totally not a shrimp ok/.

Then somewhere along the line Adayti came over and Jyoti was run off by mom but TEF doesn't let player see this shit and just UGH PLZ GAME. Sat and SORTA CUDDLED with Adayti for a bit (also didn't realize Tor was crying RIGHT THERE UNTIL AFTERWARDS jihfreiuehgiuler) but when asked, told Adayti she was indeed feeling better.

And then later later LATER in the day there was a mom next to Nali and omg I love this ;; /happy purring.

April 21st, 2016

The day started off piss poor. As most days seemed to start. If only Sonali knew what was coming though.

The Golden watched her sister and mother give Niki nuzzles, feeling bitter about how little affection she gets from both. Noted Kio and Kalidas' presence. Felt pretty ignored by the lot of them, even if a few glances were sent her way, though only really expected such from Niki when he went to stand with Circe and stuck his bum in her direction. Luckily had Adayti next to her, feeling pretty grounded thanks to the hybrids presence. Despite being ignored by her family, knew that was the last thing that was happening to her from Adayti and was silently thankful for it.

Regardless of being ignored, hoped that the lot of them would take into account her proximity. Close, but not on top of them. Thoughts of how this would be turned against her lingered in her mind but she didn't really care at the moment.

AND THEN ADAYTI LEFT


And then Mom got up and came over. OH. /Puts the fekkin pieces together. OH...OHHHH. Fml.... Queue more 'why am i like this...im horrible i hate myself...'

And then a really emotional rp that the player CANNOT HANDLE gfhreighzriolghz



Sat with mom the closest she had been since...she was a fawn >_>

April 20th, 2016

Had a rather toxic conversation with Nikhil the other day which lead to the Golden retreating to her Glade, and her Dreamworld, to recover mental wounds. After getting out of the main part of the forest, proceeded to get violently sick from all her trembling and holding in all of her emotions, her body physically unable to handle the mental trauma. Had to lie down for a good day, unable to eat or drink anything, and far too depressed to even care. Constantly hearing Nikhil's words comparing her to Isabeau having caused a deep wound to form within her heart. Cannot imagine how she is like the dragon girl, considering the rumors that followed the Livewire. She didn't abandon her mother nor did she ever say anything remotely bad about the Tigress to anyone. In fact, Sonali wanted nothing but to be with her mother again and had always held her in the highest regard even if there were times they clashed. Knows very well that Niki had every right to hate her, but she wished he would consider the fact that it was his actions that lead to her attacking him to begin with, even if her intention was never to be a cause of his death. While the use of magic against him was a poor choice, the major difference, she concluded, was that she was still but a child at the time, whereas he was an adult. If anyone should have known better, it was him. Regardless of how distastful the whole situation was, and how debilitating the conversation became, can't hate him. Never hated him. Didn't hate him when he attacked their mother. Only wanted him to get away. Does wish she was able to stop Jyoti from finishing the job, but even then...he was still a child at the time too.

Also thought about what Adayti had said, about not getting herself killed for those who wouldn't give her the time of day. Could only really relate that to Niki, not so much Shard, but considering how they were always together, there was a safe bet she would have to lump the two of them in the same category of 'not giving her the time of day'. Decided that when she'd feel better, she'd work on just her mother. If Niki didn't want her around, fine. But she had a right to be near Shahla as much as they did. At the very least the older brothers could give the estranged children some time with their mother. Resolved to get a closer tree, since she was pretty much done playing nice with the older brothers and keeping her distance for their sake. She knew this was likely the wrong decision but she came to the conclusion nothing she does is right so she might as well do what she thinks is right.

Later in the night when most of the forest inhabitants went to bed, snuck into the forest and made her way over to the tree she had been favoring. Not sure exactly why she was drawn there, perhaps maybe expecting to see her mother or Jyoti, but instead found herself surprised that it was surrounded by potted plants and baskets. At first extremely confused, and pretty anal because did I pick another damn taken tree? only to find out...the items were for her. The hoofprint, although like any other hoofprints, was coupled with Adayti's scent. Queue lots of emotions. Got a really big lump in her throat as she touched her nose to the paper and feather, before quickly making a few trips to relocate the gifts to her glade. Unsure why she felt so choked up about it, it's not like she never had received gifts before. Perhaps it was all of the crappy emotions, or perhaps because Sonali was beginning to understand what a real, close friend was. Hollowed out one of the neighboring trees to place the baskets inside, while lining the area around her den with the potted plants. Did enjoy some of the preserved meats and fruits, having only really been eating squirrels and some birds she could catch. Not much of a meal anymore, even if she wasn't much bigger than she was.

The paper and feather were brought into the den however, placed against the 'wall' where she usually rested her head. Sorta just stared at it, feeling warmer than she had in a long time. Planned to locate a closer tree to her mother, and if possible, apologize.

April 12th, 2016

Returned to the forest only to find out Jyoti was severely injured. Learned how, and why, and found herself withdrawing into herself once again. While not exactly suicidal, has come to grips with what might happen and determined to protect her family, especially Jyoti, at all costs. Although having lost the verbal fight with her brother, still settled that when the time came where more Elyrian forces were sent to kill her and her brother, she would request to speak to Dione herself. If she could save her White mother and Jyoti, then she would be able to rest in peace. After all, this is all her fault. She died and came back. You're not supposed to come back. Jyoti was only doing what he thought was right for Shahla, and Sonali understood that. But she couldn't see him die because she defied eternal death. Regardless of death, doesn't exactly want to die either. Although having had suicidal thoughts, and a failed almost-attempt, truly wishes to be with her family, especially Shahla again. If she had the ability, if they could grant her just a short audience with Dione, would gladly do whatever she had to do to protect her family. if that meant losing her head, then she was fine with that in the end.

Then some drama between Jyoti and Pyrite and gdi im not in the mood for this. Curled up in the den alongside Tor (who seemed just as upset as she), and dozed off for a while. But later in the night, once again left to her glade. Could only really pace, scratch her growing horns on the largest tree, and pace again. Felt the tug for her mothers grow stronger, painful. Screamed and cried and begged for Leia to visit her, just once. Some guidance, anything to help her out of this constant, cloudy state of mind. Eventually succumbed to fatigue and collapsed outside of her den.

April 11th, 2016

Has been keeping herself by the tree a ways from her mothers den when not sleeping in her glade. Does daily go to her brothers den to rub against it to tell him and Tor she is still around, but otherwise has swallowed herself up into herself. Accepting of outside presences (like Pyrite I think? SOUPS HORSEY), mostly because she doesn't have the energy or heart to turn others down. And sorta just...wants company but inwardly knows she's probably in the wrong regardless and that she can't win.

Mostly just dozing her life away, but roused when a disturbance in the force was felt. Wandered to the pond, aware of her mother heading in the same direction and found herself staring at a large ram fighting her brother. Judging on the location, can't fathom it was Jyoti who started it and figured the ram was just digging up an old grudge when Jyoti had attacked isabeau when he was not in a good mental state. Granted while it can't be forgiven, one would think he would take the higher ground as an older male, but as Sonali sees it, the Ram gave into more primal urges and doesn't particularly have a stable head on his shoulders either.

Was of course going to run in tp help Jyoti but felt like REGARDLEESSSSSS of what she would do, it doesn't matter because she's wrong and everything she does is wrong and probably should have just ignored it like she did pretty much everything else that doesn't revolve around her family. But even then that would proably have been wrong too so WELP just getting used to being a loser. (Y U SO DEPRESSINK).

After the fight, mostly due to mom interfering and making it look like she was pushing Jyoti back, felt a bit bitter towards the tigress but at the same time resolved to feel that she was putting on a show for the Ram to show they were not really part of it. To protect her new kids. Queue more resentment and understanding YAY! Was quick to sniff her brother, and then turned to check up on Sha BUUTTT the Tigress ran so :| Wheeled back to Jyoti and suddenly a Gabe. Quick small conversation and was quick to defend her brother despite knowing that the attack was likely the ram holding a grudge.

Soup: "What happened?"

Blade: "The ram is crazy..I was merely fishing when he attacked me.."

Soup: "And you were only fishing?"

Blade: "Yes. I mean, of course I defended myself.."

Soli: "Why not ask the other witnesses if you don't believe my brother." Sonali said, her tone emotioness, though quietly seething towards the ram.

Soup: The Stormborn's gaze drops momentarily on Sonali. "Your brother once attacked someone within Ramsus's home. It's not wrong of me to make sure." His tone doesn't give away much, a little more flat than it was a moment before. "Ramsus is all muscle and no brains. Treat him like the dumb bull he is. Avoid unless the fighting cause is worthy." Gabriel begins to step aside, hesitating for either to reply to him.

Blade: "He doesn't own the pond.." Jyoti simply stated. Not a stubborn statement but a generalized one. He felt the bull had zero cause to attack him for simply fishing because he was hungry. "I try to avoid him.. Really..I don't want him going after my Mother or little siblings because of me.."

Soli: "If he does, than he's dumber than he looks." Sonali sneered. "And paint him a fawn attacker. It'd spread like wildfire."

Soup: Gabriel nods to Sonali. "Stole the words from my mouth." And perhaps put better than The Stormborn cares to. "If he truly attacked you first and without provocation, any attack he'd make on family can't be justified." Though Gabriel couldn't see himself justifying anything Ramsus did.

Blade: "Justifiable or not means little if he causes serious harm to them.." The Firefly sighed softly and shook out his pelt.

Soli: Sonali snorted. "If he does hurt any of the fawns he will have to deal with himself." The words could be taken in any way, as cryptic as they were. But her words spoke volumes to those who knew of her powers, and it was very much a threat.

AND THEN GABE LEFT BECAUSE A WILD MOM APPEARED 8D

And then Jyoti told Sonali to stay back which earned him a grunt. She'd be looked down upon for it but she's getting used to being seen poorly now. Stood and strained her ears to listen in on their conversation, but hardly expecting anything good to come of it.... (SONALI WHY U DRAMALLAMA).

But got a good slap across the face when the events turned around to be MUCH BETTER than she thought would happen. When Sha gave her a nod, nodded back. When her mother left, turned around to leave but halted at the sound of hooves. Ohai Jyoti. Honestly wanted to shove her head under a rock because of how poor her thoughts are. Wishing she could go back into time when she was innocent...before Niki had launched the attack on their mother, before she mindlessly assisted her enraged brother in defending...which ultimately ended up in her older half-brothers' death. Stared out into space, just remembering the good old days and hating herself for the change...

Later followed Jyoti to a tree (but not after being sorta almost intercepted by Pyrite who wanted to chill and Jyoti had NONE OF THAT, so just politely said she had to go, lowkey felt bad because he was nice quiet company, and went to curl up at the tree. Was told to stop hiding (totally hiding), said she wasn't hiding (TOTALLY HIDING). Got Tor cuddles, and when everyone seemed really quiet, silently retreated to her glade before some hella drama went down. WAIT TIL YOU COME BACK TOMORROW SONALI

April 8rd, 2016

Still keeping herself rather distanced, despite being more accepting of jyoti's closeness again. Retrieved the flower crown Tor had made her (PRESH CINNAMON), but brought it to her glade.

Made her way back to the near-but-not-super-close tree she had chosen to remain by the family without intruding completely. Would have of course moved farther/closer if asked, so blissfully unaware her mothers true feelings.

Dozed off as she usually did, but was roused when shit went down between Niki and someone she faintly recognized but didn't really know who he was (Haakon). kept out of the fight, mostly because she wasn't sure if her brother had his charm fixed, not wanting to hurt him in the process of helping him. Did dart forward when her mother got into it, but didn't actually engage, unsure if she should even get into it. At one point, became the target of Haakon, barely able to escape when she didn't realize it in time. Luckily she was only a target for a few moments, hiding out behind a tree feeling rather...emotionless about the whole thing. Player doesn't understand why Sonali was so numb to this fight....

After all was said and done, watched the male collapse and laugh hysterically. Definitely unnerved, but more so when Niki tore the males throat out. Found herself completely frozen in place, only her head able to move around and glance about. Not particularly afraid of Niki and what he is capable of, but more unnerved that she had just witnessed something of this magnitude. Killing prey felt different than this, listening to laughter turn to gargles, then silence, was something that left a lasting impression.

When she found her hooves again, moved off to the tree and curled around it. Willed herself to the dreamworld, not so much that she needed balance but at least there she could create a distraction for herself.

April 4rd, 2016

Spent a day along the edge, filling herself up on smaller animals while looking for a decent den. Definitely calmed down quite a bit, kicking herself for the conversation with her mother but ultimately glad she could at least get it all out. In the midst of mulling over things, stumbled upon a glade of sorts with numerous trees sitting together in a sorta half-moon shape. The tree in the middle was by far the largest, though not large enough to house anyone of her brothers sizes. Still, it would easily house her and then some, and perhaps her children if she ever did truly settle on having some of her own when she came of age. Rubbed all over the trees, before retreating back to the forest to gather her things. Once back at the Edge, located her glade and put her things nearby as she dug her den. Did however, misuse her magic to sorta hollow out the inside without killing the tree, making herself feel extremely sick in the process. Once she was done, had to lie down for a time, but eventually had to limp off to vomit in some bushes. Continued misuse of magic is taking it's toll on her, but she's determined to deal with the consequences.
Waited for a while to feel like her stomach would settle, and when it finally did, went back to the forest. First stop was to wash herself off in the idol, shake herself off to dry herself, and then go to Jyoti's den. Began rubbing the rocks in a sorta silent "I'm back" but at the same time just as quickly passing it to go towards her mothers den. Know's very well the Tigress was pissed off and holds grudges, so didn't go as close as she has been. Laid down, still feeling sick, but wanting to stay near to prove that she was trying, despite her earlier complaints. Did eventually fall asleep, her bodies way of recovering her magical misuse.

April 3rd, 2016

Distancing herself from literally everyone, particularly Jyoti. Not wanting to seem like she's his shield, but at the same time knowing she pissed her mother off. Does still of course unconditionally loves everyone, but needs her own space for a time. Meandering at the edge of the forest, AVOIDING PORTALS SHE STUMBLED UPON, because we do not want a repeat of Azeroth. Contemplated going back to see Moroki, but decided against it. Thinking about finding a Den along the Edge, seeing as her stash is not in the best of places. Correction, definitely going to find a den along the Edge. And so begins her search.

March 30th, 2016

Soli is really lazy. Sonali should be in when Soli gets home from work tonight :| And will actually do what Soli wanted her to do days ago...I hope.

March 26th, 2016

Left the den for food, water, and a bath, but not after giving a nuzzle to Jyoti and the kitten that had somehow made it's home with them. Can't say she complains, since the kitten had given her company in the past. Does ultimately wonder where it's parent's are though.

After managing to catch a fish while getting a drink (pretty much surprised player as much as character), took a quick shower in the idol to rinse off everyones scent to allow her own potent one to be prominent. Went to the tree she had been lead to by Shardul near her mother's den to eat the first meal since she had gone unconscious keeping her mother alive. Was aware of the Elyrian there, quite glad that she was alright (considering that Sonali HAD noticed she had been absent for a while). After demolishing the fish, settled down for a nap to dry off, and to wait for her mother to awaken to see how she was doing.

March 25th, 2016

Finally recovered enough from her Dreamworld. Upon awakening, felt a small body next to her and was at first alarmed, but seeing the malnourished kitten besides her made her more curious than anything. Still felt too groggy to go see how her mother was doing (and because she needed to talk to Jyoti first...), simply lay besides the cub to relax a bit for what she felt was going to be a long day.

March 21th, 2016

So, mom got mauled by something. PISSED OFF GOLDEN.
Proceeded to go into her trance and force her magic into her mother to keep the tigress from dying. Basically killing herself BUT HEY ITS OK SOLI WONT DO THAT TO HER CHAR AGAIN. But Sonali will be out of the picture for a few days.

March 17th, 2016

(Soli is a terrible updater so let me just...summarize.)

-Shit happened to Niki.
-Tried to find out what.
-I'm sorry Shard ;_;
-It's not my place to tell Mama, Jyoti.
-What's that?
-Who is that?
-Why is Shard fighting-oh. OH.
-Wanted to help Shard BUT ITS NOT HER PLACE 8(
-Followed Shard to a tree (Ylva's den I think?) and watched him smear blood (from Krim) onto the tree.
-Learned exactly what she did to Niki.
-Learned of Varg.
-Kinda linking Varg to what happened to Jyoti.
-Went back to her tree.

And since then basically just sat at the tree and hunted to keep her weight on. Even though she knows Niki and Shard hate her, the fact they even give her the time of day to even talk to her is enlightening in itself. Kinda back to being hopeful that someday she will get back on their good side, and integrate into the family again.

And then FEELS LIKE SHE HAD A HUGE STEP IN PROGRESS when Mama came over and LEAD HER TO THE DEN.

LITERALLY...had to resist all urges to:
1. Crawl under her mother much like she did as a fawn-cub.
2. Crawl into the den to where she used to sleep and just BREATHE the scents.
3. Curl up around Xiao and just give her the 5 months of love or so she was unable to give due to her death and not being around for the childs' birth.
4. Cry.
5. Explode because she loves her mother and siblings so much and shes SO SORRY and fjkheiuotghasioug (Sonali plz these emoshuns!)

Sat a few feet away from mother and siblings, even though she was invited closer, wanted to respect the Tigress and Jade's space.

March 14th, 2016

Has taken to the tree Shard lead her to, not moving all that much except to get a mouse or two and a drink. Today went to get a drink, only slightly noticing Niki, Shard and a bunch of kids with them but not paying them too much attention. Drank her fill, but on the way back did get a twinge of anxiety. Briefly looked to her brothers, kinda...feeling like something was wrong with Niki but unsure what it was. TRIED to get closer just to get a quick sniff in just to see if everything was ok, but took the hint from Shard that she wasn't welcome (which only lead to the conclusion that something was wrong with Niki, and so thus lead Jyoti back to the tree. Contemplating telling her mother, but figures it wasn't her place.

March 12th, 2016

Most of the day was spent resting by the tiny tree she had preferred sitting by near her mothers den in the past. Ignored the others nearby (Morgul, Kios and Nimh), before dozing off.

Woke up a bit later only to notice none other than her mother had taken up residence a short ways away by a rock. Was't facing her, and at first wasn't going to because...felt really shy or something (idek what's up with Sonali half the time now...), but eventually grew some balls and turned to face her mother to ensure she was giving the Tigress her full attention. But then kinda dozed off again, reveling in this closeness.

Upon coming to, found that TWO LITTLE ONES were RIGHT in front of her (Deus and Xiao). Kinda nearly panic jumped away but held her ground as to now upset the kids (or her mother for that matter), and exchanged sniffs. Kinda teared up because even though she is very jealous of these kids, felt herself overflowing with love for them. kept her magic under control, knowing very well that strong emotions have tended to make her magic do all sorts of crazy things lately.

Watched the two youngsters sass their mother and pretty much silently cheered them on from her tree. Had a few good laughs, inwardly thanking her sister Circe for instilling such sassiness in them.

Then Dia showed up. It didn't seem like Dia was particularly comfortable with Sonali's nearness, so the Golden proceeded to shrink and bow from a distance, trying to ensure that it was okay to stay away and that she was no threat. Not sure but possibly may have been stared at by the Lily, but chose to ignore it as Niki came over. Shrank a bit behind the tree (out of habit), watching him exchange pleasantries with the family, when...suddenly two kids. Kinda just stood there in shock, mostly because she had never heard of Niki taking up a mate (Oh Honey Sonali...), let alone that he was expecting children. By the looks of them...they didn't exactly look like new borns and she could sense magic even from this distance. Felt herself freak out a bit, because if they are Niki's children, then they could probably be hurt by her magic. Resisted the urge to bolt, as her mother was her priority and she wouldn't let anything scare her off (unless she was asked to leave which she would).

Felt her heart sink a bit when they all seemed to cuddle up, wishing she could join them. There was a slight sadness because, even if she had not assisted in her brothers murder, she still had magic he couldn't tolerate. She had considered...trying to get rid of her magic but it was who she was. Without it, she would no longer be herself. She'd be a magic-less shell. Magic was her life, literally.

Sat down and kept her eyes on the family, resting her head on the ground as she watched them longingly, magic billowing over with love, though directing the wisps behind her.

At some point, Niki got up seemingly aggressive at someone near her (Genesis). Did however get up quickly, afraid maybe her presence was bothering him (because she didn't really notice horsey at first). This seemed more apparent when Shard came over and drove her off. It didn't take much. Bolted behind a tree and peaked out to see if he was following. After a few moments he did, though tapping the ground to get her to follow him. Quickly followed him, thinking he was going to berate her but found that he lead to her to a tree closer to the family and away from the horse. (Player is still somewhat confused because I think I was lagging but its ok SILB).

Sat down to rest, feeling kinda awesome to be lead closer to the family, BY SHARDUL NO LESS.

Then dozed off again because it's what Sonali do.

And then Deus was back, but this time actually learned his name and had a conversation with him. Long story short, had to lie a bit about why she didn't play with him and why she kept her distance, naturally HATING that she had to lie, but knowing that now wasn't the time to tell him about why she was distant and estranged. And she thought it was her mothers duty to tell him, as she might seem a bit skewed on her perspective of the situation and she'd be DAMNED to pit her little brother against their mother. Like HELL NO.

Was told to get better and join the play next time, when he returned to Sha. MELTED. Jealousy was gone, and hope renewed. Decided to stay at this tree from now on, considering she was LEAD THERE by Shard, she figured, at least until told otherwise, it was alright to stay there. Curled up, contemplating if she should start digging a den there. But then sorta passed out SNORE.

March 11th, 2016

Couldn't sleep, not so much because of her leg being bruised, but because she hated herself for ... hating herself. Felt weak, pathetic to say the least. Stayed by Jyoti however, because if the one who had done this to him returned she'd be ready (and control her magic this time). When restlessness overcame her, went to the tree she used to sit by, but not after rinsing herself off because some caked on blood from the scratches were definitely not sightly.

But basically thought 'Hey, stalking Mama made her love him, I'm sure it will work for me', so figured she would just plant her ass right here forever until the day came when she was welcome back home. GG Sonali.

March 10th, 2016

Long story short because Soli blue screened TWICE while trying to update chars:
had a mental collapse because of what happened to Jyoti.
Tried to kill herself by running into a rock.
Suddenly Niki.
Told Niki how much she hated herself for his death.
Given a confidence boost by Niki. (And he basically confessed some of the things he had done to Mom)
Niki left.
Suddenly mom.
Freaked out a gain because Mom you can't see me like this.
Mom left because Adayti was there?
Adayti gives them water.
Vows revenge on the one who hurt Jyoti.
Sleeps.

March 9th, 2016

Have an rp.

[6:17:20 PM] EASY BAKE HUSBAND (Soli): "Why is it when I sleep you two always get into fights?"

[6:18:15 PM] I Bake Males (Sen): "Wasn't just us, Nikhil was there..." Leaves it hanging cause suspect this is loaded information.

[6:19:12 PM] Bladeh: "Don't.. worry, Sonali.. It's been delt with."

[6:20:08 PM] EASY BAKE HUSBAND (Soli): The little gold doe stomped her hoof irritatedly, turning in a small circle, her nose upturned. "It involved many...including Niki." She huffed and eyezoomed her brother. "You're not burned because of him are you?"

[6:21:26 PM] Bladeh (OnyxOryx): "No.. friendly fire." He spoke. "We fought the wolf named Varg. He is bad." He did not want sonali to know what Adayti warned him of Varg. She was too innocent..

[6:27:52 PM] I Bake Males (Sen): Picks up on him leaving out vital info but just raises brow at and sighs before looking back at Sonali, "I'm not sure why, but your... family... seemed the most against him. Was gonna... head that way after I'm done here but well..." Inwardly just sighs because i don't want to go there i don't like Nikhil or shard they give me weird vibes and just.. .ugh. " ... Got pressed messed up in the fight as well. Would you be able to go there for me? And give them these?"

[6:29:43 PM] EASY BAKE HUSBAND (Soli): Sonali moved around in another circle, pent up energy getting the better of her. "And of course I missed it." Large ears pin back in annoyance. "And of course you get hurt." She pauses to listen to Adayti, having unintentionally ignored her first comments as her ire was directed at her brother. Heaving a sigh, she turns to face the Oryx and walks over to her side. "I'll do that when I see them next. I doubt they want me near them right now." Part of her anger was the fact she couldn't even HELP...maybe get on her families good side.

Sonali was given a small leather satchel filled with several soft and clear tubes filled with a slightly green and minty smelling gel (kinda like liquid band-aid and Neosporin combined) its stings a little when applied but fights off most infections. Creates a seal on the wounds once its dry. But since Niki and Shard aren't there rn just kinda sat down pouting because all the shit happens when Soli's at work :<

March 5th, 2016

Upon awakening, went to check up on her old den and the doe who had taken up residence. Was pretty surprised to find it surrounded by others, and the faint scent of blood gave way to the idea that the birth was in progress. A little sad that her den was no longer hers, but ultimately knew that it was in safe hands with the doe who needed it way more than she did.

Aside from that...felt...odd. Something in her gut was just acting up and she felt anxious, nauseous, but also excited. Sorta witnessing the birth made her realize that someday that would be her. That she would have kids of her own and she would learn from the mistakes from her own childhood and strive to be better. Knowing full well that she is finally growing now (new horns ), and that while the rut was still a long time away, she would be ready and hopeful.

But then a wild Niki appeared. Felt a little apprehensive, but was pleasantly surprised to find herself being sniffed and greeted. Was of course quick to return the gesture, offering him a smile as he walked away after the fact. Sorta REALLY relieved that he didn't seem upset.

When it seemed like the birth was over, retreated to her new den.

March 4th, 2016

Returned to the forest with a crap ton of stuff from Azeroth. Hauled everything to their appropriate places, most bags going to Shahla and Kio's place as well as the tree she generally left gifts for her Half-Brothers. After all of that was said and done, returned to her den only to find it taken over by a doe and some others (Rose and friends). Noticed her Pregnant state and reserved herself to giving the den up for a pregnant doe who needed it more. Retrieved her things however, and went searching for a new den. Found a new place but unsure if it's taken, so just sorta stuffed her stuff in for now.
Super tired after her return, so gonna nap. (AKA Soli gonna play this game on her tablet)

Slept most of the day until was tapped awake by a nervous Jyoti. Kinda sassed him that she wanted to rest, but all in all followed him to his den and took residence ontop of the rock. Promply fell asleep in the sun.

February 26/27th, 2016

Long story short, basically went back to Thunder Bluff to check on her brother and Adayti, had a brief conversation which consisted in him scolding her :| but also leading up to the worry that Adayti's father had also followed her through the portal. Gdi Sonali creating a train into this world. Suckered the two into borrowing wyverns to go to the Southern Barrens where the quillboar where. No luck there. Went up north thanks to borrowing some giant wolves for mounts. Oh. Found Sen barely conscious in the form of a dragon.

TRIED TO HEAL BUT FAILED. Has no idea how to heal using the magic in this world

And then Adayti turned him into a frog. GFDI...

Made their way ALL THE WAY BACK TO TB and left Sen with the Shamans. And sorta realized Adayti has Shaman magic in this world. YAY.

Got a letter from Moroki and basically had to trek ALL THE WAY TO WAILING CAVERNS. GFDIIIIII

Learned that there was a place called The Dark Portal that lead to other worlds, and that Moroki would have to go through soon. She was also going to be looking for other members from the destroyed Camp Taurajo to create another tribe, which ultimately meant that Sonali, Jyoti and Adayti might join considering they appeared quite near the Camp. Kinda excited about this as it would help them blend into the world. Was told they would need to complete the Rite of Vision though...which basically meant they'd become Tauren adults. More excite.

From there went back to TB, was given a parcel by Moroki which consisted of Hearthstones for the three of them, which are apparently really rare. But now they have their way to get back to Azeroth if they ever do find their way back to the forest.

February 21st, 2016

Week three in Azeroth.

During this time, fully recovered from her broken arm thanks to the magical skills of druids, priests and paladins alike. Has been avoiding Adayti and Jyoti, not that she didn't care about their recovery but she didn't want to disturb them with the thoughts that plagued her, especially Adayti.

Had seem most of Thunderbluff during her moments of thoughtful contemplation, even going so far as to almost fall down a sheer ledge that seperated one of the plateaus from the other. Was of course, pulled back by a giant pink bird named Phlox who was the partner of a hunter named Twinarrow. Whoever this Tauren was, she was a great listener, or perhaps Sonali simply divulged information because it was tearing her apart.

Admitted to the hunter that she had an extensive family, but twisted the situation a bit. Instead of flat out saying how she was pretty much outcasted along with her brother Jyoti, told the Hunter that she felt distant from her family since they haven't seen each other for a long time. Was reassured that families stuck together no matter what, and that they were likely looking for them. Was also told that she herself had wandered from family at a young age and was almost killed by Quillboar, but her family and tribe rallied and drove them back.

Feeling rather sick to her stomach at this point, bid the Hunter goodnight but not after thanking her for the rescue and short conversation. Meandered back to Elder Rise, mulling over the words "families stuck together no matter what". Kinda thought it was a lie, considering how her family now treated her. Even came to the sickening conclusion that although she tried her hardest to see Nikhil and Shard in an equal light, her mother in particular didn't seem to show the same respect. Remembered how Shahla had told her that she couldn't go home because she wasn't sure how the others would feel about her. But what about how SHE felt? Dying, and then coming back to a screwed up world that hardly seemed to want her. Felt really bitter about this epiphany, but at the same time, can't exactly place blame on the others. Completely torn between feeling unfairly treated but not? (Sonali can you plz make sense I cannot even rn).

Decided to cast the feelings out of her mind for now (because she can in this world YAY!) and wandered back to the main plateau, taking a short hike up the giant totem pole in the center. There she discovered creatures called wyverns, which looked like lions with bat wings and a scorpions tail. Found herself drawn to the beasts, as they once again reminded her of her mythical home.

And that's where a mini adventure began. Or rather, another one. HURRRR

Was approached by a large male, who had seemingly mistook her for someone else. Was greeted a BIT coldly, telling her she was late and Sonali could only give him a 'wtf you on about' face, before having her hands shoved full of meats wrapped in leather. Was then told to go to Orgrimmar because they had ordered this shipment, and the Goblin-made Zeppelin was in for repairs (for the third time that week). Was lead to a Wyvern that was older, and seemingly more well-versed in the skies. Didn't really object. Had no idea what Orgrimmar was bit this is Sonali we're talking about, when did this kid ever have sense.

Before she knew it, she was clinging for dear life as the beast dove out of the hole at the top of the totem pole and took to the sky. Her mane whipping about her, she felt like she was riding Moroki's hippogryff again, but the flight pattern was a bit different. Like the hippogryph, it didn't take all that long to cross over the massive lands of Mulgore or the tattered remains of the Northern Barrens. In the distance she could see great plumes of smoke rising from the cracks that were caused by a Cataclysm that had happened a few years back.

Orgimmar was a sight to behold, and she immediately understood why this city was considered the main capitol of the Horde. Giant iron structures with heavy chains and red leather greeted her as she flew above the great entrance of the city. Guards riding Wyverns soared around her, while below city people scattered about their lives. The landing was rather rough, considering the front legs of the wyvern were also it's wings. The Stable Master took her mount, and she had to ask a Guard for directions to the inn that had ordered the supplies. Down an elevator and towards the front of the city. Ohhhkay.

GOT LOST. HELLA LOST.

There were SO MANY PEOPLE. Tauren of course, but also other people she had never seen. Orgimmar might have been the main capitol, BUT, it was also the city of the Orcs. Orcs are lumbering green people with vicious features. Trolls are greenish or blue, and are tall and lithe and have huge tusks and tribal hairstyles. The goblens are TINY peoples, and green. What's with all the green people? Sonali can't say she likes them too much, they don't seem to give a damn about nature at all. Then there were the Blood Elves, or Sindorei. These are pale skinned people with varying haircolors, but they all have bright green eyes that glow and long ears that stick straight up. They are pretty small too. Then there are the Forsaken, or Undead. If Sonali were any other, she might have been afraid, but considering all the Zombie deer she had seen in the Forest, this didn't really bother her. She figured if a zombie deer from the Forest came her, they'd certainly be one of these Forsaken. Rotting features and sickly skin, protruding bones and even missing jaws. Yuck. Kinda inched away from them. Last but not least, are the Pandaren. Apparently these are a relatively new people, which were split between the Horde and Alliance. They are black and white bears (or grey, brown, or red), chubby and fluffy, but they are as nice as they are fierce.

Okay so onto the actual story...

Finally managed to find the inn and give over the supplies, and was thanked before given a tip. MONEY Tied the pouch to her belt and headed back out into Orgrimmar. Learned she could send mail, so figured she would do that immediately to let her brother and Adayti know where she went.

After the mail was sent, of course went to explore some more, but ended back at the inn and instead got a bed there because damn she tired.

February 14th, 2016

Two weeks since her disappearance from the forest...
Sonali left the forest after being drawn to a portal to another realm. Went into the portal and landed in a new world. Found that she was a sort of bipedal cow with three fingers on her hand. Decided to explore, but was attacked by strange pigmen that had odd quill-like fur on their backs. Was unable to escape, given a few wounds from the creatures when she couldn’t understand their language. Sensing her imminent doom, resigned to the fact she was going to die, again, but was saved by a horned lion. At first wondered if someone from the forest followed her, but when the beast took down the small group, it shapeshifted into a creature like herself, using lunar energy to strike the last one down. Was asked a series of questions she didn’t understand, but sorta just...followed suit. Did however learn that the pigmen were called quillboar.
Was taken to a place called Thunderbluff, and during this trip, did not know her brother had followed her along with Adayti and the two were captured…
Had her wounds mended, and spent a while to recover, while also learning more this world called Azeroth. Was given a staff after talking to the Elders, learning a few simple tricks to defend herself should the need arise.
A few days later, still avoiding any questions about her origin, was told by Moroki that she was going to go scouting, which could possibly lead to finding her brother. Agreed to go, and the two took a short journey to a place called Bloodhoof, which was mostly Sonali riding a Deer form that Moroki could turn into. Awkward, okay. There, met Moroki’s tamed mount called a Kodo, and was given the mount to ride, for the rest of their journey would take a few days. Moroki herself had a mount called a hippogriff, which also looked like it could have been from The Forest, being part deer, horse and bird.
Upon reaching the place called the Barrens, was told that this was where Moroki was born, a place called Camp Taurajo. A group called The Alliance had destroyed it, and it was apparently a civilian village. Wasn’t sure what this Alliance was, but decided not to trust them...for now anyway. Turning north, they came upon the area where she was found. Noted the familiar huts, but the creatures were nowhere to be seen. Followed Moroki, brandishing her staff just in case. A few moments passed, before Moroki told her that there were two other Shu’halo (the Tauren name for Tauren), and they were being dragged south. Felt her stomach clench at the notion her unintentional adventure could have lead to her brother and Adayti’s deaths. Once again on the Kodo, the two were off down to the Southern Barrens.
The journey was a bit treacherous, passing a bit of a warzone between the Alliance and the Horde (as Moroki clarified her faction was), though the Alliance side seemed to be only humans of varying sizes (Dwarves are a thing, Sonali…).
At the very South end of The Barrens, was a passage filled with huge thorny foliage on each side. It was there Sonali got her first taste of battle. The duo had to fight their way in, the staff proving useful against the more primitive hammers and axe’s the others wielded, able to knock them away before they could get close. Granted, clobbering them on the head did wonders.
There was no sign of her brother, or Adayti.
However, after calling out a few times, got a weakened yell from none other than Adayti. Charged in the direction of her friend, and had a one on one fight with a large quillboar. It was tough, considering the size difference between the two, but also the hammer threatening to snap her staff in two. During one of these parrying moments, noted the poor health her friend was in, and then noticed her brother unconscious near her. Felt fury boiling within her, even more so when she was struck with a hammer that shattered her elbow. With a scream of agony, and anger welling up inside of her, summoned some kind of magic she didn’t know she had in this world, and quite literally burned the creature with gold light. With it fallen down dead, and weakened herself, she checked over Jyoti as Moroki came up behind them.
The Druid strapped her brother to the hippogriff, who flew away after careful instructions regarding the male. Then Moroki had Adayti use her as a mount, and Sonali went back to use the Kodo.
Days later, Moroki, Adayti and Sonali returned to Thunderbluff and received healing for their injuries. Adayti and Jyoti would need more time, but in the meantime, has been learning the ways of the Tauren, and also learning that the magic she absorbed in this world and alternate life, is that of a priest.

January 31st, 2016

After hiding out within the forest to recover, having found a new sense of purpose thanks to Adayti and Jyoti some days prior, took to following her hooves to the Edge of the Forest. Honing her magical senses, managed to find, or perhaps unknowingly created a portal elsewhere. Perhaps here she will find the way to gain in body what her soul had in death.

January 21st, 2016

Has been keeping herself secluded in the cage in the ruins, nibbling on what little grass she could reach outside the bars. Was found by Jyoti and Adayti, a doe she remembered trying to help Jyoti when he was dying. Naturally didn't feel threatened by, but did feel slightly awkward as the two lead her to a bunch of rocks near the playground, not too far off from her mothers stash.

Long story short, admitted some things, learned some things from Jyoti and Adayti (Jyoti supposedly poisoned Niki, and Adayti is motherless), and pretty much insulted Adayti and made the doe leave. Felt like utter shit, and told Jyoti to go to his friend and proceeded to put herself in a sort of time out in her cage. Jyoti followed and tried to get her to see sense, but she felt like shit and horrible and a terrible person. Ran off to hide in the Old Oak but LOL ADAYTI WAS THERE. Pretty much screamed how sorry she was before going to hide in her tree. Apparently Adayti followed and put herself inside the den too. Oh. UH AWKWARD. And then Jyoti was huffing outside the den.

But...although so much bad had happened then, was drawn into a game of Peacocking with the two and...well, had the first fun she had since being reborn. Actually laughed. Actually enjoyed herself. Enjoyed being alive.

After they romped as triplets, went to settle under a willow by the pond and was sandwiched by the two of them. Felt the best she had in a long, long time.

January 19th, 2016

After spending days meditating in the Dreamworld, came to the depressing conclusion that there wasn't much she could do for Jyoti. His impulsiveness, coupled with past events was nothing she could deal with, as much and as dearly as she loved him.

He had told her to move on, Circe seemed to make it clear she would have to decide, and it was obvious that she had to be near the family at all times to avoid her mothers ire.

And then Sonali goes about projecting on Jyoti, Circe, everyone. GFDI.

Confident however, that considering Niki was capable of murder as much as Jyoti, that Jyoti would come to be accepted just as Niki had. It would take time...who knows how long. But she knew that she was currently unable to be away from her family much longer. She needed them, even if they didn't necessarily need her. Corrupted dreams, feelings and thoughts that did not seem to be her own were too prevalent, and while a piece of her still wanted to trade places with her White Mother, did not want to spit on her sacrifice. Knowing she will never be able to repay the White doe for everything that she had done, but also knows that if anything, Leia is a true mother through and through.

Upon awakening, took the only objects she needed from the den, leaving the rest of it for Jyoti after telling him he could live there. Kinda hoping he does since she DOES KINDA LIKE THE PLACE BUT YEAH.

Dragged her skinny ass over to the tree she had taken to sitting by when Jyoti died, wanting to make it apparent that it was they she was choosing. Jyoti would forever be with her in her dreams, and she would visit him, but her rebirth was for her striped mother, and that was the decision she was making.

Just sat there for a while, keeping her right side facing her family, not wanting to scare them for facing them. Kinda finds it...weird that she is so disassociated with her family but...if that's how they wanted her to progress.

Then a Tsa. All the feels because her younger sister was HUGE and sniffs and just kinda the whole Stria KINDA??? reaction sorta maybe idr. Just kinda choked up because "we used to be the same size". Then tsa ran off

And then sorta dozed off and suddenly mom (and some kiddosssss!) HUFF WHEEZE FREEZE. DO NOT MOVE. BREATHE. Remembered Dia, and Deus, buttttt didn't know the third (XY is your new name Xiao Yu ;D) ) Of course tried to act as casual as she could when inspected by Deus, giving him a proper greeting before he moved off. Kinda felt a bit sick due to the fact the three siblings were playing (and because she MISSES THAT WITH HER FOUR LITTERMATES SOBBBB).

THEN RP IN PROGRESS.

There's much less tension and fear she holds around the golden then that of her brother, so Shahla doesn't have too high anxiety letting her youngest run around as she approaches her child for a second time. Her posture is more relaxed than it has been in some time around Sonali since her return, and it surprises her a little. "Have you seen Jyo, lately?" she asks, getting to the point. Her tone is soft, quiet and without any judgment. While she was estranged from the firefly, for now, she still hoped he was well enough, and she assumed only one of the siblings would know.


Sonali was tense, mostly because she was constantly afraid of scaring her siblings she barely knew. But also because she wasn't sure how her presence would be taken. When the Tigress spoke, Sonali knew the best option was to stay completely honest, to be herself. "Last time I saw him was when it was still raining. I went to the Dreamworld for a few days..I had...to collect my thoughts." Her mothers tone startled her, for how soft it was regarding him. "I told him he can stay at my old den." Now basically making it known she no longer called it home. "I..." The Golden tried to speak, but couldn't bring herself to apologize yet again. Words only did so much. "...hope I'm not intruding..." She finally concluded.


With a small nod, the tigress' eyes move to focus on the distance briefly before they're returned to settle on golden fur. "He's going to need someone" she begins and I can't be that someone is spoken silently, only in her mind. She knows, out of everyone in the family, that Sonali would be the only fitting option for Jyoti to have right now as things are fleeting and Sonali seems to be the only one on, at the least, neutral ground with everyone. Eyes lift, settling on the Golden's cheek before she speaks again, "How are you?" she asks of Sonali this time before giving a small shake in response to her last words of intruding. "You're not.." a deep breath " it's nice to see you again.. here"


Sonali can't help but to feel her stomach contort at her mothers first comment since she asked about intruding. The Golden herself believed the same thing, that Jyoti needed someone, but Jyoti had given his wishes, and she could only hope that he would find someone else, other than herself. Swallowing a bit painfully, she catches her mothers eye regarding herself. "Could be better." Sonali admitted shyly, not too keen on admitting the full extent on her malnutrition. The price to pay for her time in the Dreamworld. "I'm glad to be here." The final comment is spoken with a renewed gusto, head lifting to show some physical proof. "This will always be home to me."


"Anything you need?" her voice carries towards Sonali quickly, spoken in a rush with mild concern and a head tilt, and while eyes squint it's far from judgmental. "I.. don't have much, but I could get something" a small shrug "if there's something you need". With a deep breath in, the tigress lets it out slowly as her gaze drifts to linger around the tree her daughter was just resting at. "You can visit whenever you like" she offers, though her posture becomes tense and slightly uncomfortable as she takes a step back and turns her head, stealing a glance to her other children behind her. She means her words, of course, but she feels guilty at throwing on even more wants about her presence onto Sonali as she had done before Jyoti's death.


Sonali merely stared at her mother for a few moments, thinking about what she could possibly need. Staring nonblinkingly, there was only one thing that Sonali both wanted and needed. Shifting her weight nervously, but keeping her glowing eyes locked on her mothers, the girl spoke. "...Just...tell me you love me." There was a small hint of a cry at the very end of her comment, her ears flicking back as she felt she betrayed herself. Being strong was so hard. Her eyes flick to her siblings, forcing back her jealousy and trying so damned hard to be happy for everyone else even if she herself felt less than gold and more like pyrite.


The tigress begins turning and stops when her side is facing Sonali. Ears fall, and her face turns down and to the side as lids close over golden orbs and she sees darkness. Lips slowly part and close a few times, teeth clenching before they part a little more and she lets out a whispered, "I love you" Her tone, while soft, is still slightly pained at the circumstances of everything, and it was evident in her tone and stillness. She doesn't open her eyes again until she's finishing her turn and heading back towards her other children.


"Thank you." Was the reply, slightly more monotone then the Golden had intended. With ears still kept against her head, she figured that perhaps staying at the tree was not particularly wanted, at least right now. Torn between wanting to stay with her mother, but also to heed her subliminal message regarding being there for Jyoti. But even with these thoughts, as Shahla turned, the child couldn't keep herself from taking a few steps after her mother, her body screaming to follow, to return home. Trembling, and once again on the verge of a breakdown and downward spiral, she whispered pitifully. "I wanna come home, mommy."


Her steps halt at the thanks, and she'd give a small nod after turning her head slightly so it would be easier for the Golden to notice and catch. Her steps pick up, slowly, but the whisper finds herself stopped once more. Her body remains straight, head as high as it had been and tail slightly tucked. Teeth clench so tight she feels a dull throbbing in her head until she finally stops, parting her jaws and turning her head once more. "Things have to be alright with everyone and you first, Sonali" she starts gently, because if someone that lived with Shahla was uncomfortable with it it would break everyone down. She doesn't want to assume how anyone else would feel about it, and in part she's not even sure how the majority feel towards, and about, Sonali. "I'm sorry" is whispered, an apology that she couldn't give it to her yet, couldn't give what she seemed to want so much.


"I know." The tears fall, the reply expected but they still fall. Even knowing all along, the confirmation just makes it more real. Self loathing once again bubbled in Sonali's chest. At this rate, with the amount of time she'd need to continuously stay in the Dreamworld to dissipate her dark emotions would kill her slower and more painfully than her magic did. "Am sorry too." Reverting to baby talk almost, thanks to trying desperately not to just start sobbing in front of EVERYONE, the Golden slowly backs away. "Come back...later..." She knew now that she had blew it today, not able to just sit there near the family, as her comments bubbled out and likely caused discomfort. She turned and 'fled', heading off into no where in particular.

Found herself at the ruins, climbing through the bars of the big cage and passing out inside of it.

January 16th-19, 2016

Sonali will be in an induced coma during my mini vacation to recover from dark thoughts and feelings. She will be situated underneath the rocks in the Playground. You're welcome to sit with her sleeping body/ leave an rp here for me to read, but any attacks on her will be void since I won't actually be in game.

January 15th, 2016

Sleeping. No energy to even move. Was awakened by Jyoti, and followed him when he asked, robotic at this point. Briefly noticed another by her home (Reina), but didn't pay her much mind as she was lead to the playground. Curled up next to him, joined by someone (Adayti) she recalled trying to help Jyoti on his death bed. Mostly just gave her a subtle nod, resting her head on the ground.

January 14th, 2016

Really unable to deal with the damned rain, her mothers impending death, and being unable to be with her family. Just an overall FML day.

Kinda fucked herself over in a conversation with Circe, basically admitting she kinda wanted to die again in order to save her mother, feeling her life was sorta worthless now. Knows her words hurt, but it hurt her just as much to admit them, to feel as shitty as she does.

GDI Sonali.

And just bleh.

January 13th, 2016

Spent a few days in her Dreamworld, especially once the rain came. Saw what it did to her fur and how skinny she was, feeling insecure at the fact she might make her family feel bad. Took the Guar pelt into her Dreamworld and began changing it into a cloak that she could wear all the time. Used some rabbit pelts around the neck to keep it soft, and parts of the pelt were formed into a hood as well.

Upon returning to the forest with her cloak, went to seek out Jyoti who she knew had returned due to his star in her world ebbing it's brightness. She wanted answers.

And now for rp.

----------

"Jyoti." Sonali's voice sounded behind him.

The male's ears folded at the voice of the Golden. He turned his head to look at her, but couldn't bring himself to fully see her. "Sonali.."

The Golden paused, hesitation crossing her features. "I want to know why." Her tone was cold, as cold as the bitter rain that fell around them. "Why you went off and attacked that stupid dragon child, putting our relationship with Mom and the family in further jeopardy. Don't you want to be taken back!?" Sonali almost sobbed the last part. "And then you LEFT ME. ALL ALONE!" She screeched at him, tears in her eyes. "Barely eaten. Barely bathed. I don't know what's going on with Mama Leia because she never comes to talk to me. I'm starting to question that you bringing me back was a mistake. At least in death everyone got over it. Mama had more kids. Leia has her magic. You have Kitai. No one seems to need me, let alone want me." Hatred bubbled out of her, though the hatred was directed more at herself, for it was she who had died to begin with. And it was she who had fucked up her relationship with Niki when she tried to drive him back.

Jyoti was not really in the mood to be berrated by the one he thought would never turn on him. Suppose he should have seen that coming. A bitterness welled in him and he wanted to spew vileness at her. That she'd know why he attacked if she ever cared to visit him. To actually TALK to him. But no.. She spent all her time in a coma. But he bit his tongue and stood. She didn't even notice his stripes were back. That his magic was back. "Mother Leia is going to die." He said, matching her coldness. "She loves you.. She wanted me to tell you she loves you and yearns to see you again.. But she can't.. She's not allowed." He kept his face away from her. His back to her, unable to face the Golden when it was his fault she was losing a mother. "And it's my fault."

If anything could have shockeed Sonali, hearing that her mother whom she barely knew was going to die was certainly that. A sharp intake of breath could be heard, ears snapping shut against her Guar pelted head. Her wings fluctuated, vibrating in ways they shouldn't, exactly what happened before she had lost control. But she was in control, her face contorting with pain from both the news and her magic threatening to ensnare her. She was at a loss of words, choking on that which could not be formed. But at the very last comment, the Golden felt her body run cold, her heart sinking.
"It's because you brought me back...isn't it." Dread was overwhelming, icy cold fear that felt more destructive than the rain. "I should have stayed dead."

Jyoti's head hung. "No.. Sonali.. it's not /your/ fault. It's mine.." He said quietly. "Mom needs you.. it will just take time, Sonali.." They don't need me. None of them do.. not even you.. Nobody needs or wants me.. I am a pain bringer.. Life ruiner.. His last sentances remained unspoken. He stood against the rain, drenched, unable to be in shelter because the ram and his family have hogged it. Not that he was even cariing anymore. "I should have stayed dead.. Not you.. You have a chance, Sonali. Don't ruin it.. She.. she wants you to take care of yourself.." Him too but.. he wasn't deserving of his Magic Mother's love.

Sonali couldn't breathe for a short while. She was still mad at him, mad at him for making matters worse, but she still LOVED him. "Fix it Jyoti. No matter how long it takes you fix it." She said much calmer this time. For the first time in a very long time, her thoughts were pretty clear. "I need to find Circe." The youth moved to walk past Jyoti. "You can stay in my den. Don't let Mama's rebirth go to waste." And she kept walking.

Jyoti snorted as she walked away. Fix it? Didn't she get it? He couldn't fix things... Not if those he needed to fix things with were unwilling. But he tried to stop her. "Sonali don't! She might be with Nikhil.. He's hurt.." He tried to stop her. Didn't want her be yelled at as he was.

Sonali didn't stop, not until she was close enough to see her mother. From her position, she couldn't see who else was gathered, but decided if Niki was indeed hurt, then it was best for her to wait to approach Circe. Not that she didn't care about Niki, she truly did, but at this time, approaching would only be seen as threatening, likely. Instead went straight to her den and hid inside, mostly to cry her eyes out because she wanted to see her White mother more than ever now...

January 9th, 2016

Still mostly keeping herself plastered to the small birch tree, covered in the Guar pelt her mother had given her a while ago. Thinness persists, with added weakness due to lack of physical activity. Keeping to her Dreamworld, embracing the stars that are her family, as close as she feels she will ever get to them.

Woke up briefly due to a nearby scuffle, considered involving herself but felt sick at the thought if she did so, her mother would hate her so went back to the tree in a desperate attempt to avoid it.

Later on, heard foodsteps and was nuzzled by her mother, but before she could usher her weak body up, the Tigress moved off a bit. Followed her mothers gaze, and noted her brothers in the distance. Despite wanting to press herself against her mothers side, stayed still by the tree, but ready to dart in her brothers defense if needed.

(Soli was tabbed and didn't know Sha came closer HNGNGNGNG)

Sha came closer, and got a sniff, and then she moved off again. Unsure exactly what to make of it, but reveled in the closeness even if it wasn't entirely....loving? That's probably the wrong word Soli can't thing plz forgive.

Stared off after her brothers, poised, ready, almost darkly HOPING they get in a fight JUST so she can charge in to aid them. Willing to die for them...willing to die just to show her family how much she loves them.

But it seemed the situation resolved itself, and while there was a breath-holding moment when Shard inspected her, stood her ground and returned the inspected, and pretty floored with his approved nod? Almost choked on her lack of air before omg you got close to me ;;

The for a long while sat facing her mother. JUST REALLLLY RESISTING THE URGE TO CRAWL UNDER HER ANF fjeorh aplg yhesd8r9oiA

And then Amadeus. ;; Was FINALLY able to meet another sibling, the first being Dia. ;_; Did the whole sniff greet stuff, REALLY HAPPY that SHahla kinda initiated the whole thingggg. And then they bounded off because Sha is a shit and I SAW THAT BUTT NUZZLE YOU HUEHUE DEUS

Kinda stood there for a bit trying to catch her breath, was REALLY AFRAID to do much for fear that she would be ousted more, then sat down. THEN DEUS AGAIN. COULDNT REALLY UNSTAND WHAT HE WANTED, but in the end was like "IM SO SORRY IDK WHAT TO." And nuzzled him a smidge. AND GOT A NUZZLE BACK AND SORTA cried when he left because she was so fucking happy sobbing.

January 7th - 8th (Early Morning), 2016

Again just spending time by her families home without actually being there. Kinda just engulfed in her depression and loneliness.

Later on was approached by Cole and couldn't really understand what he wanted. Then a little later, Ronra came over. Tried her best to be nice and greet an the whole shindig.

Then just went back to sleep because a dreamless sleep was more bearable than the waking world.

January 6th, 2016

Sleeping.

January 5th, 2016

Same old, same old. Really numb at this point. Suffering from the trauma of losing her brother to also being estranged from her family. Also, dark thoughts continue to plague the child, mostly consisting if she should ask her family if she should go away, because it seems like they preferred her dead too at this point. Not that she has anywhere to go...

However, still also just desperate to get back to her family and be accepted by them, though as the days progress is less and less confident.

Went to sit by the tree she had sat at before, noting a sleeping Circe in the distance. Wasn't seated for long until her sister went to sit at the tree SHE had sat at the the other day, but not before giving a sort of nod of approval, at least that's what the Golden had hoped. Of course greeted in return and went to sit but wasn't seated for long until interrupted by a big deer. Did not recognize her at first (mainly because Soli sucks at Gen4's), but quickly recalled this deer as Mama Smell's child. Put on her best happy mask, though inwardly distraught that the doe smelled like her mother and wanted to just cling and sniff all creepy like. Held her composure, sniffed and greeted, all that jazz, before Rue moved to sit off by a nearby rock, and Sonali decided to sit on the side of the tree closer to her sibling.

Worried that Rue's presence will make her family think she's choosing Rue over them, but also hoping keeping the tree between her and the other would say differently.

Sorta just...spaced out. Barely noticed two little fawns come over to Rue, not really in the mindset to greet them because totally spaced out. Glad Circe seemed to inspect them know, figured maybe she knew who they were. Sonali put two and two together girl!

And then even later, Mama Smell came over. The bigger of the two went over to her and then LIGHTBULB. OH. Figured or kinda just realized the babies were Lilu's.

The doe came over, and after a little bit, initiated conversation.
------------
"Sonali?" Asking as though to prove that it really was her in front of the succubus.


The child fought to keep her composure, the succubus' scent intoxicating. "It's me." Her voice was a bit weaker than she hoped, but part of her hoped for a better reception than her initial return to the forest. "I'm back."


She recalled the moments she’d approached the tigress’ den, the moment she’d peered inside to see Sonali’s lifeless form. That was over a year ago now. She shouldn’t be so surprised to see the golden doe walking around again, and yet…

“Your mother had allowed me to see you, your body… Heh guess I shouldn't have worried so much.” She took in a deep breath and smiled. "Its nice to see you back, Sonali."


Sonali pulled her ears back, her own memories recalled how her magic literally destroyed her. But her magic was as much lifegiving as it was the cause of death. It was something to be respected, feared. She didn't say so verbally, merely nodding her head. What surprised her was that her mother had allowed Lilu near, but perhaps that was not really surprising. Mama Smell was of course, Mama Smell. Close friends, if not to be considered distant family perhaps.

Feeling a bit relieved, the Golden mustered a smile. "It's good to be back." The words were a half-truth, mostly because of the childs' poor mental state at current, but the most true of all her feelings was how good it was to see the maroon doe again.


“Have you, been back long?” She heard herself saying, as she’d recalled the time she thought she’d seen Sonali a while ago, though she'd never checked to be certain. Small talk meant a lot right now, anything to distract her from the current on goings surrounding her family and the disappearance of one of her children.


The Golden thought about it. Considering her days spent in the Dreamworld, coupled with her days spent staring at nothing...well, it all blended together. "A few months now, I think." Sonali replied meekly. She suddenly felt her words might be insulting, because back then, Sonali did back an effort to visit the doe. "I'm sorry I haven't come to visit...I've...been dealing with some things." Another mustered smile.


Ears perked momentarily before relaxing once more. “You might not have found us even if you searched.” She wasn’t quite prepared to tell Sonali that she had since moved den’s. The gold doe didn’t need to know that the old den was now just a ‘mock’ den. It was a safety precaution the family had created following a few previous events. “We’ve been dealing with some things too.” She wouldn’t tell Sonali that she’d nearly died either, and had become a slave to a Viking. But she would gesture over to the small fawns that lay next to Rue, and then realised that Sonali wouldn’t know she’d had more children. "But, not everything has been bad." She said before smiling towards her children.


The Golden looked a bit concerned, glowing orbs flicking over the doe before seeking out where the den was in the distance. She decided not to question it. Her eyes wandered back to Lilu's, finding the doe looking to the two fawns. Another smile crept upon Sonali's face, noting Rue with her younger siblings. /That should be me./ Sonali thought sadly to herself, her thoughts momentarily going back to the images of her own baby siblings. Swallowing thickly, she looked back up to Lilu. "I'm happy for you. They're beautiful."


Something seemed off, or perhaps Sonali had always been this reserved, and the succubus had simply pictured her differently. Time had passed by of course, and Sonali was no longer the tiny fawn she used to be. “Thank you.” She said, feeling that sense of pride that only as mother could understand. But that soon faded when her thoughts shot straight back to Sam, and that hole in her gut reared its ugly head again. She shook herself lightly. “Well, if you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to find me. Anything at all.” That went for all of Sha’s children, but it was the first time she’d voiced it out loud.


Sonali dipped her head, the words meaning more than Lilu could probably understand considering how crappy the Golden had been feeling. "The same goes for you. I'm always here to help." Perhaps Lilu was different, perhaps her mother wouldn't be so put off...right? Sonali wasn't sure. Could she risk it? Maybe. But not today. "I live in a big tree by the pond, so if I am not here, I am probably there." Another smile was given, trying her best to appear as normal as possible.


Her smile remained sincere (which is rare LOL) “I’ll keep that in mind.” She hardly ever visited the pond but she guessed in her head as to which tree it might be. She was also pleased about this, as Sonali could be a potential babysitter. Perhaps she could ask the doe to help watch over the youngsters when the succubus took her trips to Riki with Varg. But she wouldn’t ask that of the doe now. This wasn’t the time or place. Slowly, she’d turn to face her children and settle close to them, quite content to relax in the moment of peace with Sonali close by.


Sonali nodded, still smiling, before she too folded her legs beneath her to sit. Although feeling pangs of jealously towards the family, there was also an overwhelming feeling of happiness for the Succubus and her children.
----------

Then Soli had to afk to get food because omfg my stomach felt like it was eating itself. And then Soli felt sick because she ate too fast. Go me. So let's just say Sonali dozed off because that's really all she does now anyway.

----

Woke up a long while later to see that Niki and Shard were very close by. Paranoid that they would be upset with her closeness so quickly greeted/thanked everyone before hauling ass to her tree. Climbed in and sorta just...went back to sleep. and I broke all my tabs and decided to leave her out so meh

January 3rd, 2016

Rinse and repeat.
Wake up.
Eat.
Drink.
Go sit near her family's area.
Mostly just sleeping her life away at this point. Afraid to have friends, afraid to get close to family.
Was resting when a lion (Gabriel) came over. Politely greeted him after they exchanged sniffs, and for a moment thought the lion was going to speak but he left as soon as he came. Laid back down in the blueberry patch, thoughts turning dark as she mulled over her situation. Wondering if she just should have stayed dead, might be easier on her family.

January 2nd, 2016

Awakened from a rather dreamless sleep, and forced herself to eat one of the pies. Could feel herself coming down with something, which wasn't a good thing. After eating, went to the pond for a drink and made her way to the trees she sat at a day before. Noted her mother and siblings in the distance, so chose a tree slightly farther away to sit at. Placed herself angled slightly away from the family, not wanting to appear imposing or staring.

Wasn't seated for long, because Mama came over. Immediately stood up to exchange sniffs and offer a greeting. Not entirely sure what she could do or say, so instead just stayed put when her mother moved off to the babies. Circe came closer and moved to one of the trees she sat near yesterday. Nodded to her sister before sitting again. The empty feeling seems to be going away today, figuring its the closeness to her family. Probably will only be going to the den to sleep from now on, determined to make her presence known until it is not wanted.

Kinda sat with her head on the ground watching everyone for a long while. Noted Niki and Shard come over, watching the latter give nuzzles out, coming to Circe to give one to her too before moving off. Couldn't help but fear another pang of jealously and homesickness. Watched as Circe got up to go sit with Shard, and figured now was the time to back off. Got up and turned, walking away to yet a farther tree before sitting back down.

January 1st, 2016

Awakened, finally, after spending a few days within her Dreamworld. The Dreamworld was full of fog, the way it was before Sonali had found her mother Leia. When the girl broke down, so did her Dreamworld. Meditation was needed to achieve balance, and while balance was nearly reached, it was imperfect. Far too many emotions to ignore. Anger, confusion, yearning, fear, sadness, desperation. The Dreamworld was left incomplete, the stars in the sky faded, the galaxy only half there, the windchimes dripping like wax. She would sink into the crystalline floor, flowers were wilted.

She ignored the need to eat, or drink for that matter, and immediately went to sit by a tree near her families home. The need to become accepted was more desperate now, the need to no longer be alone of great importance. The desire to do anything was present.

Curling up around a tree, she waited. (Seen as asleep because Soli isn't going to stare at TEF to keep her awake and BG off sometimes breaks my tabs ;_; )

(And then Soli did break her tabs e_e; )

Was approached by Shardul later on. AND RP.

The Nightling wastes no time in getting to the point. "Your brother," he looks over the Golden carefully, doing no more than keenly sussing out a reaction both physically and verbally. "Do you know what happened?"

Sonali was a bit taken back to be approached so suddenly, but she rose and quickly greeted her elder brothers as best as she could with how shitty she had been feeling. "No, I have no idea..." Fear lingered in her voice. "But I don't blame either of you." She added quickly, genuinely. "What did he do..?" Assuming it was Jyoti who caused the chaos, feeling her gut fill with ice when the words passed her lips.

He makes no movement when she speaks; a small nod to whatever greeting she may have offered but otherwise he stands motionless beside his brother's form. Off-white eyes seem to intensify at her second sentence, but when she asks he seems to loosen a bit. He's not sure how much he can believe anything with the two, after the Firefly admitted to having targetted him out of spite, but he's aware that he can't quite kick Sonali into the same opinion he has of Jyoti. However, that doesn't mean he's unable to do so. The reason he's here is more than to inform her; it's to get a hold on her feelings. "He attacked Isabeau in their home." And he says nothing more, taking it slow so as to be able to do what he was here to figure out.

There was a long moment where Sonali looked quite confused. The name Isabeau rang a bell, but she couldn't put a face or hoof to whoever it was. But after more thinking, she briefly remembered a little feathered fawn who did not seem to like her when she was just a child herself. The memory that this Isabeau was related to Shard somehow. "...Why?" She knew very well that they probably didn't know the exact reason considering how little they felt about Jyoti, but she couldn't help but breathing the word anyway. She wasn't angry, at the moment anyway, nor was she remotely happy. Her eyes fell, unable to look her brothers in the eyes. "I wish I could have stopped him..." Her voice was flat, if not depressive sounding. "He's been..." She trailed off. This was no time for making excuses, even if she did feel something was wrong with Jyoti. "I am so sorry..." She offered an apology, even though she had nothing to do with the incident. She stood still, forcing her magic away from her brothers in an attempt to become less threatening if her presense happened to cause such.

When he notices the confusion on her gaze, he's not sure whether it's about the situation or who it was as a whole. But when she murmurs the soft question, he assumes the source of confusion on her face with that. He has his own bitter response, but he wills himself to bring out a better explanation - if he ends up managing to say it out loud, anyway. He looks expectantly when she trails off, and the apology makes his ears flatten. "It's not us who need to be apologized to. Do you know what he did, doing that? To your family?" His eyes narrow, as though expecting an answer but at the last minute, figures that he doesn't want to hear what she has to say to answer that. "He risked them. It doesn't matter if nothing's happened yet." And that's the key word; yet. He still is unaware of just what the intentions of Ramsus are, but again hopes that the risk of setting his family in more danger than what the Firefly had posed that night means more than rectifying the attack on more than just the deceased himself. "But you didn't have anything to do with that," it wasn't his intention to say the words as though she needed to be blamed. The Nightling is aware enough to draw away from that. "How was he? Desperate? Before telling us how much he wanted to hurt my brother, how I was attacked out of spite, how we were only obstacles in his way? In... your way?" He directs his attention to the incomplete sentence she mustered out before, the last question a bit more inquisitive than it is pressing.

The Golden kept her eyes downcast, her ears folded against her head. If only she had talked to Jyoti more, consoled him. Tried to get him to calm down out of his despair. His question falls on her heavily, but at the same time, confused. She didn't know about Isabeau's new family, only that with Niki's smell, there was someone elses on Jyoti's as well, one she did not recognize. When the Nightling told her the answer to his question, the girl winced. If only she had been more observant to Jyoti's feelings...trying to play mender for the family only made it worse, hadn't it...
She snapped her head up, 'yet' reading her ears and ringing loudly. Shard continues, but his words only go in one ear and out the other. It /was/ her fault too, even if it wasn't direct. She was always indirectly to blame. His final words cause her to shiver ever so slightly, for she had no answer. She didn't know how Jyoti felt. She knew how she felt, she could only guess how everyone else felt. Swallowing tears that threatened her eyes, she rose her glowing orbs to focus on her pale brother.
"I can't answer that. I don't know..." She continued looking at him, Circe's words to treat her brothers as equals rising and causing the Golden to tense up and stop seemingly cowering. "Where does Isabeau live." The youth declared, finding some strength with what she was considering doing. "I'll make it right. I'll protect the family." She avoided saying that Jyoti would want her too, because she was well aware now that her brother had likely damaged all his relationships more than she could even hope to help. "I'll do anything." The final sentence was spoken out of desperation, pleading. She wanted to prove to her brothers as much as the rest of her family that she loved them and would do anything for them. And if she could do this, she would.

He doesn't consider the fact she might have understood him wrong when she answers, or that he's assuming her answer with the questions before, but he makes no movement to let the feelings that gathered from her first response - even her silence beforehand - show. Although the next question has his pupils narrowing into slits and the fur along his back prickle up. "No," the word is breathed out, almost desperate on the very edge of his voice. It wasn't that he didn't want the family to be helped like she wanted; he just couldn't trust that the Golden wouldn't just aggravate things more. Everybody had been fine to avoid the family; even he and his brother, separately. He manages to smooth his spine fur down marginally, eyelids softening despite himself the same way. "I don't think anyone would appreciate having any more to do with the situation if it can be helped." He pauses momentarily, regretting his phrasing last for a moment before continuing. "We leave each other alone. Best not to draw it out if it's possible that they don't feel any regard towards the situation." Isabeau was laughing at it all, after all. Despite his paranoia, he doubts the situation was regarded by the 'victim' with anything but amusement; it sickened him to hear as much as he was to get involved at all. "I feel that if something was to happen, it would've happened already." And his eyes only then turn from the Golden to stare off in the family's residency, carefully, as though expecting to see them in some way before turning back to Sonali. "Is your brother going to return?" He inquiries again, his voice notably softer. While still holding his own doubts and thoughts, he refuses to let himself snap at the Golden. They were just about wrapped up, anyway.

The Nightling didn't have to say it twice. The initial 'no' was enough to get even Sonali's ridge of fur rising from the tone itself. But when he explains, she realizes how stupid her idea must have sounded, and somewhat bashfully lowered her eyes once more. It made sense. If nothing happened yet, perhaps it would go forgotten...whoever it was that Jyoti pissed off. Although perhaps not meant to comfort the Golden, his words did. Leaving each other alone, if something happened it would have happened already. It did ease her fears some, but it also took away from the things she could do to better her relationship with her family. She lifts her eyes only to notice Shard's flick towards the nest, following his gaze briefly before returning them to her brother. The following question made Sonali's gut tighten. The darker side of her thoughts lingered on the idea that perhaps they wanted to know for their own insecurities. She shook her head quickly, trying to clear the stupid thought from her head. "I...don't know...I don't have that kind of magic..." The Golden did not know how Jyoti and Kitai even brought her back, only that they had succeeded. "I'll tell you if he does though..." She felt they did have a right to know, even if they probably didn't consider them family, and considering Shard's choice of words regarding Jyoti.
But then she remembers the necklaces, the two objects she had strung around her neck since she finally figured out how to make them. She still didn't know about her brothers charms to avoid her magic, and she didn't even think they'd want them, but she figured since they were here now, they should recieve the items and do what they wanted with them when she left.
"I forgot...these are for you both..." Sonali's voice was soft, lowering her head to drop the portal necklaces on the ground. "...I tried to make something to keep you both from being affected by my magic...but...they don't work as well as I hoped..." She looked rather downtrodden, but she took a step back from them. "They're strong enough to keep the magic they are made of from hurting you though..." She looks to her brothers, then looks away. "I don't expect you to keep them...but I thought...maybe if I tried..." She trailed off, becoming less and less confident as time marched on.

"You won't need to." He shakes his head at her offer to tell them; they'd be aware, he was certain. As much as he wants to apologize to the Golden for her potential loss of brother, even though he's certain Jyoti has to capability of coming back, he doesn't regret the fact he'd died. The only thing he regretted was telling his mother and sister that he seemed able to survive the night - with the help of others to boot, he didn't expect Jyoti's demise. And, still, the Firefly had known only the restrain of his brother rather than what the Firefly had shown the night Nikhil choked on his own blood and continued to be battered long after he went limp.
While remaining quiet, ready to end the conversation there, he blinks when she presents the two items. When she places the items down, he forces himself to stay in place while his eyes drop down to the necklaces. "We've made our own a while back," his voice isn't scornful, however. As much as he can't trust the items anyway, unwilling to risk it, he's aware of her seeming nature of it all. "Mm.. Thank you, though." The words fall at a bit more of a murmur before stepping back. "Alright." He adds, mostly directed at himself or his brother, giving a parting, stiff nod before turning just as his eyes darken with thought, making a retreat - though he'd pause if the Golden had anything more to say.

Sonali nodded at his reply. She figured it would be best to tell them regardless, so they weren't surprised. As for her gifts, she expected as much, sorta. She had hope they would be taken and used, or hidden, but rejected...eh, what could she really expect. Forcing them upon her brothers was a horrible idea, so she took their thanks before tugging the necklaces back to her. At the very least, she could wear them as a reminder of the pain she inflicted on her brothers, even if it was truly not what she wanted. Taking a moment to put the necklaces around her neck again, the tiny portals spinning, she looked back to her brothers.
"I still love you both." She said, her eyes glazing over. She was starting to feel emotional again, and decided it was best if she left as well. "Let me know if you ever need anything." She turned with the intent to leave them be.

He keeps his hooves planted, weightily hearing out her reply but deciding against looking back. He says nothing more as they both depart, though he takes a peak behind him to make sure the sound her hooves were treading were not in their direction rather than away. With only a peace of mind, he'd make for the rocks, still in the amount of thought he was in, but much more than he was in the beginning of the conversation.

Sonali return to her tree and laid down under the guar pelt. Feeling incredibly lonely. Eventually fell asleep, ignoring hunger pains.

December 28th, 2015

Woke up and upon realizing her mother left flowers, went off to find a place to dig a grave. Figured the rest of the family had plenty of time to pay their respects, if they even cared. Sonali dark thoughts do not suit you. Didn't want Jyoti to succumb to scavengers, so used her mimicry ability to become his size and dug a very deep hole. Pushed her brother inside, dumped in her mothers flowers, and proceeded to cover it up. Unlikely to tell anyone where the grave is outside of the family, if they choose to ask. Once the grave was flawlessly level with the rest of the ground and covered with foliage to obscure it, went to clean off at the idol. Brought the guar pelt that needed cleaning as well.

Sat stiffly, uncaring about the cold water, uncaring about anything. Unsure if she should even try now. Infuriated that Jyoti and Niki fought, not knowing what exactly they fought about, but having a sinking feeling that Jyoti would probably be in the wrong, Niki in the right, and she'd be torn between everything. Contemplating leaving, maybe finding Elyria on her own and finding her White Mother. Perhaps the white doe doesn't even want to see her.

Bashed her head on the idol in a piss poor attempt to clean her thoughts. Could not, will not think poorly of her family. Despite everything, can't hate them. Knew somehow something like this would have happened eventually. But so soon...

Once she and the guar pelt was clean, crawled out of the idol to go to her den. With the desperate need for her body to reach balance again, collapsed inside of her den when she managed to crawl inside, covered in a the wet guar pelt. Would need to stay in the Dreamworld in order to recover.

December 27th, 2015

Upon awakening, ate one of the pies that Kettu had given her from her stash before going off to her mother's nest. Found Circe sleeping by a rock away from the nest alone. Kept her distance and decided to watch over her sister from another rock.

Ross joined her a little while later, and although she remembered her mothers ire the other night regarding Kettu and feeling very semiconscious about having Ross there, didn't have the heart to tell him to go away. It wasn't in her nature. Knowing full well it would probably be taken the wrong way, but at least she was there, right?

When Ross fell asleep and was lying there for a few, shifted forwards to sit in front of the rock rather than between it and him. Didn't want to give her sister the wrong impression, but also didn't want Ross to be upset either. Sonali you can't please everyone babe.

Ross eventually left. Felt guilty, considering how he did show her kindness when she first returned. Hopes that if her life goes back to normal that she could seek him out and explain. For now though, her focus was pleasing her family, so she could maybe someday go back home.

Finally Circe woke up. Stood up quickly, and while the first few minutes seemed a bit strange/awkward, decided to speak up and question about Circe's sleeping choice. Got into a conversation about her boundaries, mostly because she wanted to know how close/far she could get. Was told to follow her instincts and desires, but to be careful. Countered that it wasn't about her, that it was about the everyone else in the family. Striving for the future, unable to change the past. Told her sister she had to have hope despite the low probability of acceptance.

Had to defend her words when Circe mentioned Nik and Shard. Reminded Circe about her question regarding boundaries moments earlier. Spoke about how she tried to find a medium and balance between her mother and Circe and the brothers. Where she wouldn't hurt one from being too far away, and the other by being too close. Also decided to mention the pendants she made for the brothers. Wasn't as receptive as she had hoped as the conversation seemed, to her, to fall a bit flat but it was still a conversation none the less and it should be respected.

Eventually asked if she could stay a bit. Wasn't sure what she expected, but the response was pretty much a denial and as such, Sonali took her leave, but not after wishing Circe well and telling the doe she loved her.

((Sonali had DCed halfway through this rp because internet sucks, so I come back hours later after shit went down RAWR))

Had gone off to sleep her sadness away, only to wake up with tension in the air. Went off in search of Jyoti, and found him in a pool of blood with Kettu and Adayti standing there. Completely went off, which was likely what had caused the other two females to retreat. Shrieked his name and darted around him in some feral manner akin to pacing. When Ket and Ada left, curled up next to her brother, likely covering herself in his blood in the process. Focusing every ounce of her magic (Catalyst) into his body, too afraid to leave him. Scented her brother Nikhil on him, but also someone else she couldn't place (Rams). Utterly terrified.

HAAKON PLZ. 8|

Currently activating her Catalyst ability. This is shown by her antlers. Feeding her brother her magic in a piss poor attempt to keep him alive.

Was eventually told by her brother to let him go. Not in a very good state of mind...at all. Covered in his blood where she laid next to him. When she finally abided by his wishes, laid with him as he declared his love for her and faded.

Sonali nudged him. Once, twice, three times. Four, five. Growing erratic with her shoving, heavy breathing, dilated pupils. The youth stood, pacing. Paced. Limping, wings fluctuating. Crazed.

Giving Lee and Rom a feral glare for being so close, and also wary of another's (Miriam) precense nearby. Also perhaps a bit disheartened that their mother and sister haven't come about. But figured because Niki had something to do with her brothers death that the Tigress didn't want to come between them all. Can't exactly fault her for it, but also can't help to be...really upset about it too.

Remained standing over her brothers body for hours, determined to fight off anyone and everyone who may wish to do his body more harm. Very unstable, covered in blood and looking like an insane creature likely. Hell, might even look like she committed the murder herself. Unlikely to sleep tonight, if at all. Dwelling in dark thoughts regarding her family, while the shimmer of light reminds her of the truth.

Retreated to her den only to grab the Guar pelt, rushing back over to place it over her brothers body. Doesn't want him lying there like that. Eventually curled up next to him, pressed against his side. She felt her last familial comfort was gone. She was alone.

AND MUSE

Click for larger size.

December 25th, 2015

Has no idea what Christmas is, or Holidays, but can really only assume since Kettu and Jyoti gave her things, that they just wanted to give her things. Didn't really ask about it, but thankful for them regardless.

Probably is a good thing she doesn't know about the holiday, considering how emotionally low she has been feeling, added to by her mother charging she and Jyoti when they went to visit. Didn't want to give the tigress more of a reason to act hostile, so just gave her mother a sad reaction before leaving, looking back a few times as she did so, leaving Jyoti behind. Went to Jyoti's den and plopped down with her gifts she still had there. Didn't have much of an appetite so opted to going back to sleep.

December 22nd, 2015

Decided to try the blue bowl again upon awakening. Surely ONE of these trees was available. Pretty much ran around the forest/paced for a while until settling by a tree. Due to her low state of mind, feeling more tired.

Kept herself curled up against the tree, hoping that she didn't miss another den or scent this time. Feeling rather...off. She had been back for a month or so, and while she did feel the relationship with her family was progressing, she was missing out on so much. All of her energy was being put into making her family happy, that she had completely forgotten, or didn't care at the time, to really focus on her own feelings.

Perhaps it was death, or isolation, or the isolation that came with death, that causes the Golden to feel so bitterly the way she does now. Innocence was swept away. The gnawing pain of hunger went ignored as she stared at the leaves, finding no comfort in their subtle movements, her mind focused on what was, what could have been.

It was only when she realized that Kalma returned that day, that the girl snapped out of her depressive thoughts. He was asleep at the moment, probably dozed off, waiting for her to notice him. She felt rather bad, even though she hardly knew him. But he had taken interest in her. Our of everyone in the whole forest, he chose to sit by her. Because of how low her emotions were, she was tempted to curl up next to him but thought it would either scare him away or insult him. So she just sat there, waiting for him to rise patiently, though appreciating the fact he was even there none the less.

When Kalma did get up, was quick to get up and greet him and was greeted in return before they returned to sitting quietly. In and out of daydreams that mostly consisted of the past. An entire year was ripped away from her, because of her actions. Came to a gut-wrenching conclusion that she had no one to confide in. Jyoti was out of the question, he had his own problems and she needed to be strong for him. And there was no confiding in her family, not when they felt so uneasy around her. She thought back to how her submission made everyone out to the bad guys...but wasn't that sorta what they were doing to her? Maybe she /was/ a bad guy. Fidgeted, feeling sick to her stomach.

Wondered if she was making ugly faces, and wondering why Kalma even seemed to be interested in her. Probably the magic wings. If anything, Sonali wasn't really spectacular, at least she didn't think so. But her wings did seem to draw attention, and while she didn't mind being in the spotlight, she would have preferred the eyes to be that of her family.

If anything, Kalma was good to keep her from crying her eyes out. His presence was, even if it wasn't meant to be, considered that he somehow cared. Whoever and whatever he was, he cared. That had to mean something, didn't it? Sonali struggled to keep from burying herself in his side. She yearned for a couple of warm bodies to curl up next to, but acquaintances weren't the best candidates until she got to know them better. Waiting. It was all she ever did now.

Just more staring off into the distance, that is, until Kalma decided to creep closer. Sorta just kinda looked at him in surprise, not that she was offended or anything, but rather that she was curious as to why he had taken such interest in her. Even with her sitting there silently, not talking, he still stayed. There were days back then where her family would do just this, sit and relax. His nearness, although not knowing him, brought feelings of reminiscence. She shifted herself towards him so they were just out of reach, but closer than before. Up close, he wasn't the most friendliest looking creature but she had certainly seen far, far worse. But who was she to decide? Someone with her looks could easily be evil. She felt the pit of her stomach freeze over as if the temperature plummeted within her. She wasn't evil, but her actions had lead to the death of her brothers. Closed her eyes shut, horrified all over again at what she had done, she leaned forward and pressed her head against the fleshy part of the males neck. He was there, he was close enough. If he wanted to leave, she wouldn't stop him. But right know, he was the only thing keeping her from falling apart completely.

It might not have meant much to him, but at the moment, it meant everything to the Golden. With her eyes closed, she could regain her composure and find the balance that was so imperative to her life. Slowly her head slide from his shoulder and she was resting peacefully on the ground besides him, out like a light.

December 21st, 2015

Woke up to Tor there again. Feeling less lonely now that she actually has someone near. Noticed another who had fallen asleep near by, curiously facing her. Wondered at first if it was someone who remembered her and came to check up on her, but couldn't figure out who they were herself. Considering they didn't attack her while she was sleeping, could only assume that they were friendly. Turned herself to curl around Tor, and gave the kitten a lick. She'd wait patiently for the other to rise. No reason to fear until given a reason.

Then the other woke up (and before Soli noticed damn Sonali fell asleep YAY ME). Got up to investigate the other after greeting and being greeted back. Yep, seems fine enough. Returned to sit by Tor and the other moved a bit closer. Despite both being strangers, doesn't really seem to care. Can't exactly relax with her family, so this was far, far better than being alone. Felt a little guilty for feeling that way though, as she felt like she was merely using them.

The taller one got up and moved closer a few times, though didn't see it as threatening but more that he seemed a bit nervous himself. Her thoughts moved to her magic, how it caused pain to her brothers. Last thing she wanted was to hurt anyone else. She was wearing both of the amulets she had created, though they did little to quell the endless magic that seemed from her shoulders.

A little while later, a small wolf pup arrived. Felt suddenly like a baby magnet, but didn't mind it. Greeted and coaxed the pup over to sit with the trio. She missed this closeness with others.

Then Soli had to afk so player invited the three sitting with Sonali to chill there because they is cool.

Soli returns, but decided to turn BG off because TEF sleep time is annoying. Will tab in every so often to check on things. Sonali is quite content with her small group of 'friends'.

And then found out later that again, the tree she liked was taken. Got up and just walked back to her current den, considering Kalma was asleep and the two kids were gone. Just hid in her den sadly.

December 20th, 2015

Turns out the tree she liked was taken after all. Feeling kinda shitty about it, but there were plenty of trees in the Blue Bowl, so had to find one that suited her.

Did find another with blueberries near it. Hoping this time it wasn't taken...the damn forest is too damn small. Sat herself next to it, waiting for a chance to speak to her brothers, or mother if the tigress was up first.

KINDA FELL ASLEEP AND WOKE UP TO A KITTN (Torbjørn). FjeoilfhiueogtfpwoGH so this tree was taken too.

Kinda darted away in surprise, having not noticed being snuggled on, but then felt bad so started to play instead because that's how the Golden rolls. But it seemed the little thing got tired, so plopped down with him. Considering her familial circumstances, felt rather drawn towards the smaller creature, albeit feeling homesick.

Laid with Tor for a while until noticing someone was there (and because Soli tabbed >_>) Greeted Umay who she fainted remembered was related to Ronra, who was one of Circe's friends. Well, Ronra could definitely be considered one of her friends...well...used to. She wasn't sure if the lion-doe knew she was alive. Everyone who seemed to meet her after her reburth seemed to turn them off. The only truly positive encounters once returning to the forest were Kettu and Kali, and Sonali was deeply grateful for that. But there was no time for pity parties. Sonali would work her damnedest to get back with her family.

Dozed off and woke up again. Was about to go to the third tree (and get the little cub to follow her if he wanted), but "heard" Kettu call. Bolted over to find she was playing. Wheeled around and ran back to the tree in time to see Tor get up and walk over. Plopped down with the kitten next to her.

December 19th, 2015

Couldn't sleep in the least.

Upon waking, got herself a drink and immediately head into the birch to find a new den.

Did find a nice sized tree, but couldn't figure out if anyone actually lived there. Was about to start digging it out when she noted her brothers at their rocks. She was fairly close to them. She reconsidered, for their sake. She didn't want them uncomfortable, so turned tail to find somewhere else a bit farther away from them.

Noted mama-Smell at her den sleeping. Was kinda half tempted to snuggle up with the doe but knew her duty today was to move closer to Mama. She wanted to prove to her family that she wanted to rekindle what was lost due to her death. Due to her mistakes.

Found a smaller tree, and although it was a nice size, she was far too used to the larger size of the den she had been using and so it felt too small to her.

Lots of scoping about all the trees. Nothing really felt right. Most of the nice trees were a bit too close to Nik and Shard. Slightly irritated at this but knew it was no fault of her brothers.

Was going to head around the other side of the birch when suddenly Stria. Was so focused on finding a new den, didn't see the doe by the nest. Remembered briefly how the other reacted upon her return, so felt a little hesitant. Didn't want to upset the doe whom she still considered a sister, but at the same time wanted to reassure her that it was okay.

Stria was scared? It seemed like it. Or nervous. Well at least it wasn't aggression. Kept her distance to make herself as non threatening as possible, partially submissive if to only show the doe that she wouldn't hurt her.

Basically this:

[8:43:53 AM] Ammy - TEF: thinking about how this looks tho
[8:43:57 AM] Ammy - TEF: stria this huge thing
[8:44:01 AM] Ammy - TEF: getting all scared by a smol
[8:44:05 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: xDDDD
[8:44:48 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: Shes like
[8:44:50 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: afraid to move
[8:44:53 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: "DONT SNEEZE"
[8:44:57 AM] Ammy - TEF: dONT EVEN BREATHE
[8:45:05 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: DONT EVENT HINK ABOUT BREATHING
[8:45:16 AM] Ammy - TEF: IF YOU BLINK, It's OVER
[8:45:19 AM] SOLILILOOOOO: ROOOFFLl

Stood as still as she could possibly can. Hardly breathing, straining not to blink, ears held out but quite literally stuck in position because gdi not gonna scare Stria >:| Briefly noticed Nik and Shard run by

Was approached and sniffed. Good...yas. But then Stria backed off, and eventually left. Wanted so badly to get big and scoop up her sister figure and be like "It's okay" ;o; Was kinda shell shocked in place for a little while. Hadn't really seen the doe since the night of her return, and although it seems the other is doing better, knows there is a long road ahead. Hopeful. If Stria is indeed coming around Shahla, her move will give them more contact, albeit still distanced. Heck, if she needed to, her old den could serve as a temporary place to go in case things get weird with the tiger fam.

When she felt she could move again, began looking for another tree.

Quickly realized though, that most of the good trees were really close to Niki and Shard's place, and she didn't want to sandwich her brothers between her and her mother, preferring to keep their mother between them, at least for now.

Went back to the tree that she had found earlier, but decided it was still too small.

Was about to dig when she heard Niki call. Instinctively, bolted in his direction, heart pounding. Was immediately ready to jump to his aid, but found him and Shard (playing? Fighting?) by their rocks. Couldn't really see what they were doing (just out of range of actions), and decided to let them be. If they were stressed, did not want to make it worse. Turned back to her new den to calm down from the sudden adrenaline rush. Decided to settle there for now, a bit worn out from the events.

Hid in the tall grass rather well. Decided that the tree was indeed too small, and that perhaps it was still too close to her brothers place, and probably too close to the den. Remembered how defensive her mother got. It made the Golden a bit sat. To be unable to go home. But such was life. Then noticed the sky was strange. Pinkish. Ran off to the pond and was baffled by giant candles and mushrooms that littered the forest. Then noticed others blowing bubbles. YAS. Well her mood went back to being happy. She still needed to move, and tonight.

Ran off to the blue bowl, thinking that was probably a good place. Rounded a tree and suddenly saw Nik and Shard. Turned around and noped out of there, kicking herself for not seeing them. Hoping to the gods they don't think she is stalking them, though figures considering how she was in 'their territory' today, it probably looked like that. Kinda felt really anxious about the whole thing.

Noted her family at their home, and stuck herself close to a vine wrapped tree. Started to feel depressed about everything. Trying to be strong was exhausting. Trying to put everyone before herself was even more-so. Trying to do things perfectly was pretty much impossible. But she had to try. She couldn't give up. She couldn't make her family think she didn't care, for that was the complete opposite of what she really felt.

Ran around until settling at the playground. Sat between some candles and nodded off as she waited for her brothers to leave the Blue Bowl. When she saw they had gone, went back over to investigate the trees.

Found a tree.

It was nice and big, and had some blueberries that could disguise the entrance. There were two others near by, but they seemed as interested in her as she them, so figured it would be alright. Although she liked it, didn't really have her heart set on it. Wanted her mother to see it first, if it was okay. It should be far enough from the family so they felt safe, but close enough to know she was there.

Went to go find her mother to ask her opinion. Found her, but with one of the kids. Stood close but not too close. But figured in the end, when her mother seemed to only stare at her, that now wasn't a good time. Retreated, going to her chosen tree to sulk. Climbed into the bush to hide.

December 18th, 2015

Hid out in her den for a few days, too ashamed of her skinny appearance to let anyone really see her. Focusing on gaining her weight back, all the while mulling over how Niki and Shard will take her attempt to ease their pain.

Was relaxing in her tree, but a couple of rude deer were rough-housing or something. Got caught up in the crossfire of spells. Although the spell itself was absorbed due to it's light magic components which in turn did a bit of good to her thinness, was irritated that the deer didn't seem to understand personal space and retreated to her brothers den. Went and curled up next to it.

Recalled the conversation they had the night before, very briefly when he came to visit. So the family wants them to come over more. Well that can be arranged. If that is what they want, that is what shall be done. Giving space, at least in regards to the family, was not exactly Sonali's favorite thing. She was a snuggler, affectionate, familial.

Kinda dosed off for most of the day outside of Jyoti's den, before getting up a while later to return to her own home. Figured her winter coat was thick enough to cover her thinness, and if asked, she would tell the truth. No more lies. Equality. That was what Circe told her. It would be done.

Today was as best a day as any other, but it seemed Shard and Niki weren't exactly near each other today. Drat. She would rather give the items at the same time. Was going to approach Shard since he was closer but had a serious case of cold feet and went to stare at the pond instead.

FINALLY THOUGHT THEY WERE TOGETHER BUT THEY WERE GONE WTF GG SONALI.

Decided to just keep the necklaces around her neck. She'll catch them at some point. Went to go find Mama and Circe instead.

Found them together, the Elyrian sleeping. Sat down for a bit close to them quietly, but then spoke to her mother. While the conversation did seem a little stiff, it went well in the Golden's opinion. She would be moving closer. Finally. Though she did like her current Den, it did reek of the pond, and the many deer that visited it every day. It would be nicer to live in the quiet birch, where she could enjoy the golden grass and blend in. Really can't wait to see the family more. Hoping this works...really hoping. After the conversation, ran back home because EXCITE. PACKING UP. MOVING DAY IS TOMORROW!

December 14th, 2015

Once more forced herself comatose. Body stabilized during this time to allow her to work within the Dreamworld without waking from hunger. Thankfully she was able to feed upon the forests magic, as well as the magic emanating from the Deity Statues.

Finally, the youth had reached some form of success. The Dreamworld was full of raw magic like the kind she produced from her shoulders, and the magic can be harnessed to create tangible objects. It's draining, even in the Dreamworld. Unlike true life, there is no real sense of time in the Dreamworld. She has no idea how long she spends in the Dream until she leaves.

Two necklaces were manifested, one in gold, the other silver. Both were imbued with magic to keep from breaking in case from physical violence or natural weathering (as well as external tampering in case the necklaces fall into not to good hands). But that part was easy. The hard part was creating portals to her Dreamworld while she was within her Dreamworld, even though the initial one was accidentally created.

The idea was to create two tiny portal to her Dreamworld and place them into the pendants on the necklaces. The first, the gold one, was made into a sun - Nikhil. The second, the silver one, was made into a crescent moon - Shardul. Sonali had spent many a day within her Dreamworld, so it was very apparent to her how her magic reacted. If her magic was sucked up into her portal into her Dreamworld, then her brothers would not be harmed by her.

Unfortunately, the tiny portals weren't strong enough. They could possibly offer temporary relief from the adverse effects the magic she and her siblings had on her brothers, but it was in way the complete relief she had hoped to make. But perhaps they would be able to see how hard she tried to get this to work. For their sake. As a family. At the very least the two items could be seen as tokens, the portals strong enough to easily counteract the white magic imbued within the items themselves.

It was better than nothing. Surely this would let everyone see how much she cared. She did this for everyone, including herself, Jyoti and Kitai.

Upon waking in the forest, having magicked the items from a portal within the Dreamworld into her nest, she realized how emaciated she was. The forest magic sustained her, but she needed to eat true food in order to get her strength back.

Leaving the necklaces in her tree, she went off to find food first.

It took her a while to even get close enough to something. Either the squirrels are wise to her act, or she was too loud due to her weakened state. Somewhat irritated at this. She was a much better hunter than this. Had to rest a few times, feeling a bit winded.

Eventually did get lucky, caught a pheasant unsuspecting of her (was downwind), and ended it quickly. Hauled it back to the den to chow down.

Kinda dozed in an out of consciousness, mostly because she wanted the food to work it's magic. She felt too self-conscious about her appearance and didn't really want anyone worried about her. Was given a bunch of food by Jyoti...gee thanks >__>. Traded some of her goods when she learned he was looking for stuff. Oh, well here.

Ate the food. Probably gonna be sick as all hell..

November 30th, 2015

Had willed herself into a dreamless sleep (which wasn't very hard thanks to Kali's affection), wanting to take a break from the Dreamworld. The Sanctuary was becoming more associated with failure, and the Golden would not have that. Upon awakening, noted she was still in the clutches of Kali. Gave the wolf all of the nuzzled before slowly inching her way out of her grasp.

Decided to go hunt, even though she was still very full from the meal the day before, and figured she could get something for the wolf instead. Nuzzled the wolf before heading to her usual hunting spot.

Stalking through the grass was so effortless now. Her eyes narrowed, nostrils flared, shifting herself to keep upwind from her prey. As she stalked, two scents were carried through the birch over to her; her mother and Circe. Felt her gut tighten. She really should go visit...perhaps with a gift. Yeah. Maybe then Circe would feel well enough to visit her.

Resumed stalking, and eventually found a rather plump pheasant pair. She didn't even give them time to notice her, pouncing on one from the grass and yanking the other as it tried to fly. She quickly dashed back to her den with both in mouth, leaving one next to Kali, and then running over to Jyoti's den to leave the other. Then promptly went to the idol to wash off. As much as she enjoyed Kali's company, having her scent on her while visiting family (especially with how awkward it is right now) would be a bad idea.

After being really soaked by the idol, heard her mother and Circe call out. Immediately dashed over to where they were, though stayed far enough away in case nothing bad was happening. Just got that whole "omg they are yelling must protect" reaction. While soaked. yay.

But it seemed like they were playing? (was JUST out of range to see emotes :I) Seemed to be given the go-ahead to approach Circe by her mother. (I CAUGHT A NOD I THINK OMG) FIGURED that it was OKAY for her to approach Circe. Well at least this made it easier...sorta. Kinda hyperventilated. Hated the whole approach slowly thing. Really just wanted to pounce her sister and beg for forgiveness and cry and tell her how much she loved her. But was just as afraid that it would be seen as either attacking or just...too quick.

Did however move from the one tree to the closer tree. Was pretty blown away at how big her sister had gotten. Allowed the Elyrian to make the move to sniff, staying perfectly still. Probably smelt like shit because she is soaking wet and leaving puddles everywhere. Keeping her limbs locked to keep from shaking. Hoping to the forest Gods that she didn't hurt her sister more with her close proximity. The tenseness, at least from Sonali's perspective, was making her slightly sick to her stomach.

When Circe seemed to move off (Sonali thought damn i really do smell bad /shot), waited a few moments before trying to close the gap between them again. Fought back tears in her eyes, really wanting to just cling to her taller, younger sister.

When the Elyrian did look back over, became submissive and tried to greet the doe. Got some headshakes. Kinda took it as a stay away, but also took it as a "i'm confused, give me some space." Didn't fault her sister at all. Perhaps this was too quick. Wanted to bash her head on the tree behind her but that would probably make it worse :I

Then noticed Circe nod and move off. And then do it again. OH OKAY. Followed the doe, feeling pretty freakin elated suddenly, ignoring how damn cold it had gotten :< BUT SOON FOUND OUT CIRCE LEAD HER TO THEIR MOTHER. GDI CIRCE. When the doe left, kinda looked at her mother awkwardly. Stay with mom, go with Circe. WHYYYY. Decided to try again with Circe. She was sure her mother understood already, but made sure to greet the Tigress of course. Didn't want her mother to think she was ignoring her. Went off after Circe again but kept her distance.

Lots of staring, crawling closer, and submissive postures. EVENTUALLY did get the courage to speak up, being quiet about it.

And then Soli had a nice post going but her browser crashed. So have a read of the rp HERE because Soli cannot be arsed to write the update again.

After speaking to Circe, went off to her brothers den. Placed the necklace around his neck, and fell into a slumber of her own.

November 29th, 2015

Awakened, half knowing her sister had been nearby but the youth didn't come closer, judging on the distance of the scent. Half perturbed, half understanding towards her sisters seemingly obvious reluctance to approach the Golden. Finding herself more distressed than ever that her sister doesn't seem to want to approach. Had hoped that Nik and Shard (mostly Nik) may have talked to her or something, unless the Incendiary was simply waiting for Circe to make the first move. So many possibility, so much anxiousness.

Came to the conclusion that perhaps her mother was wrong and that she should approach the Elyrian. All the while she was thinking about this, was rubbing her sides raw on her den. Desperately wanted her family to know 'hey I'm here, I won't bite'. Did come to the realization that her mothers scent had dwindled some, but figured the Tigress was in her mothers world. Felt a pang of sadness, having wanted to visit her grandmother.

Turned to run into the birch to catch a meal, wanting to get her strength back.

Prowled the birch some, not satisfied with squirrels, despite how fat they are. Eating the same thing day in and day out gets boring. Ignored them as they went about collecting their treasures, having her heart set on something larger, like a pheasant or something.

Did notice something large in the grass, something she had never seen before. Made sure to be quiet as she stalked it through the grass, salivating at the thought of a good meal. But the wind changed, and it noticed her. Gave chase through the grass into the blue bowl, where she tumbled a few times because of rocks. But eventually, captured the thing as it was trying to scramble up a tree. A quick bite ceased it's movements, and she reveled at her catch. (Opossum). The thing was quite big, and she knew she would eat well today.

Freakin happy as all hell, trotted back to her den with her meal with a smug smile on her face. Fek fish, this is awesome. Plopped down in her den and went to town on her meal.

Momentarily noticed Niki by the pond, but when she got up the nerve to go greet him, he was walking off. DAMNIT. Slumped into her den with a bloody face, pouting, but figured she'd look crazy anyway >_> SO CONTINUED EATING WHILE THROWING NIKI SOME DISTANT LOVE.

(And then Soli goes afk because she's hungry and requires some vegetarian tacos yum)

Was sorta just dozing all day. Well aware that Circe was closeby, but didn't have the guts to approach her sister, for fear it would backfire and make her look bad to her mother. Kinda sad that her sister won't approach her, but still understanding as to why.

Late late LATE that evening into the early early hours of the next morning, realized Kali had come to sleep by the tree. Was completely blown away at how big her friend had gotten. Crawled over and curled up next to the multi-legged wolf and fell asleep, pretty comforted at a living body next to her.

And then this:

"But shes likely clinging to her with her many legs and sleepily grooming the shit out of her 'never leave again ok'" - Togetherness

Sonali = ;___; iwontokimsorry

November 28th, 2015

(Now that the holidays are freaking over...)
After her little conversation with Jyoti and returning to her den, fell into a sort of self-induced hibernation, tucked safely under the pelt. Spent the days in the Dreamworld, once again trying desperately to figure out something to keep her magic from harming her older brothers, but also trying to contact her white mother. The first time she tried, she was practically blasted out of her Dreamworld and sent careening into a dreamless sleep. When she managed to return to the Dreamworld, her soul a bit winded, tried again, but this time wasn’t sent flying back out of her dream (mostly because she was ready this time) but instead felt as if she would pass out. Came to the horrified conclusion that something was wrong with her white mother, or at the very least, the bridge between her Dreamworld and the white does. Was hopeful that Leia was healthy and well, nothing could possibly happen to her.

After having no luck contacting her Elyrian mother, nor getting any closer to the miracle that could spare her brothers pain from her magic, she withdrew to the world of the waking once more. While in hibernation, she was able to keep from starving herself, and it also helped that her body fed on the Forests Magic as well. But she was still very hungry, so the young doe quickly headed to the birch to catch a meal.

Caught two squirrels (apparently they haven't learned yet), and returned to her tree, only to furiously rub her scent over it. Settled under her guar pelt and went to town on the squirrels.

(BG is off, skype me if you need me.)

More sleeps.

November 22nd, 2015

Spent a good full day in the dream, recovering from her shock from her returned expression of love towards Nikhil, and also now very desperately working on how to keep her magic from ever harming her brothers ever again.

Of course, there was no real progress made, but observing how her magic reacted in the Dream. She was able to control it, form more physical versions of wings, or let her magic float like time stopping bursts of lightning.

Upon waking, immediately went to the pond to quench her thirst. Reveled in its cool goodness, before going up the stream to the idol. Sucked it up and took a much needed bath, grooming herself to make herself look presentable (at least for now!). After she couldn't take the cold water any longer, went to sit in a nearby sunspot and groom herself.

Self grooming was always one of her favorite past times, but it did expend energy she could be using on hunting. When at least her back felt remotely dry, got up to run around and chase some squirrels, and maybe get something more sustainable.

Got one squirrel rather quickly, putting the body in her usually stowing tree. Stalked through the tall grasses of the birch near De Drinkplaats, and was astonished to find a pheasant couple. Managed to pounce on one and had the speed to rip the other out of the air. Did recieve a few scratches to her face thanks to the claws of the male, but ended their lives quickly and as painlessly as possible. Stared down at them for a moment and realized what she should do. Two pheasants, two brothers...right? SONALI IF YOU ONLY KNEW SHARD WAS AN INSECTIVORE! SOBS QUIETLY

Grabbed them both by the neck and trotted towards her brothers domain. Was sure to be as quiet and submissive as possible. Noted her brother, Shardul, was ITTY BITTY. Suppressed a laugh because it was actually really cute >_> Couldn't really do much about laughing anyway, her mouth was kinda full of feathers. Kinda waited for them to come over, or at least Nikhil. Was greeted by the oldest, but wasn't entirely sure if she should approach.

Instead decided to leave the gifts where she was, calling out to them that she had brought them something before she ran off to give them space.

Retrieved her squirrel from the tree and chowed down. Feeling pretty good about herself, even if her brothers still weren't nearing her yet. She could work with this. If the Golden was anything, she was hopeful. It was all that was keeping her sane.

Ate the squirrel as quickly as she had caught it...and still hungry. Having run around and dried off more, decided to hunt more. Maybe could even give something to her mother. Trotted off to her den and left the bones of the squirrel with the mice and fish bones.

Ran off to hunt again, though not as quickly as successful as before. Squirrels were not around, couldn't sniff out mice, and there didn't seem to be any pheasants. Wanted desperately to find something decent for her mother. And thats when something awesome happened. Was stalking through the grass and found another pheasant. This one was plump, and guarding a nest. When the creature went to fly, caught the tail feathers and yanked it down, ending its life. Pleased with herself, was about to bring it to her mother when she noticed something else. Eggs. About 8 eggs. All O___O. Peeled off some bark from a nearby tree and pulled the nest onto it. Very awkwardly, dragged the nest and pheasant towards where she scented her mother.

Found her mother near the old den, though felt a bit shy. Wondered how the tigress would react towards a pheasant and some eggs. Hadn't scented her mother in a while, so figured she was in her mothers world. Had been there once herself, but forgot how to get there.

Went around the front (as to not surprise her mother), and the Tigress proceeded to scent mark the dens. Felt even more sheepish because of this. Went to approach, but got mock charged. A bit sad face because of that, but understood. Dropped the pheasant and left the eggs next to it before turning and running, especially after noting Shard near by.

Returned to the den to sleep off the Squirrel. Did not notice her mother had come by to leave one of the feathers from the pheasant she left. Was later awakened by her mother who had again returned, but this time with more gifts. Gave a bit of an awkward hello and was her usual submissive self. Was given a Guar pelt, which Sonali felt would be the perfect final touch for her den. The rabbit pelts by Kettu were soft enough for sleeping on, and the Guar pelt was thick and warm enough to sleep under. Was even more happy to find out one of them was for Jyoti, so she hoped her brother would be happier once told about this exchange.

Conversed with her mother for a time, being thanked for the meals. Noticed Dia, and was pleasantly surprised to finally get an up close look at one of her younger siblings. Knew which star represented her and commented such. Was told the child's name was Dia, and replied that it was the perfect name for her. When Shahla asked Sonali to tell Jyoti, of course agreed, and commented about how she thought her brother was sick and that the pelt should help. Inwardly felt glad that her mother seemed concerned for her brother, asking if he was eating. Was also asked if she needed anything else, and there was one thing, but didn't think it was something to ask for.

(Have a small rp except)

"I love you, Mama." The Golden said, her ears falling naturally by her head.

"I.. love you too" she [Shahla] whispers quietly, stealing once more quick glance to her golden daughter before backing up and starting to head off.

Overtly happy that the sentiment was returned. Determined to get Shard and Kio to say as much as well. And eventually Circe, when Sonali was sure her sister was doing better.

When Shahla left with Dia, watched the two as they neared the pond and observed the exchange. Felt the slightest pang of jealously, wishing she were in Dia's position, but then mentally disciplining herself for even allowing such disgusting thoughts. Promptly grabbed the smaller of the guar hides and stuffed it in the Den, smoothing it out so that she could easily crawl under it when she was ready for bed. The other pelt was slung over her shoulders. Noticed the feather where the Hide was. Put it in her den before she quickly trotted to where Jyoti's den was.

Pulled the large guar pelt over her brothers sleeping form, noting his shivering. Shortly after, his shivering seemed to lessen. Sat by him, and he moved closer to her while in his unconscious sleep. Draped her neck over his and began to groom him, wondering what she could do to soothe his nightmares.

"Sonali.... Love... You.." He mamaged to whimper out as she groomed him.

As he slept-spoke, she noticed that she had unintentionally lied to her mother. Jyoti had not, in fact, been eating. Hating herself for the lie, nosed her brother to wake him. He did not respond, but his whining and huffing breaths showed how scared he was in sleep. tried harder to wake him up, when he finally did, but not after screaming for their mother. Alot of pitiful looks were given to him.

Asked him what was happening, but was only told it was a dream. Noted the rotting bird he clung to and found herself getting upset. Told him that their mother was worried but was met with bitterness. Had a bit of a shouting match with her brother, defending her family all the while figuring that this anger was not truth. Knew deep down her brother wanted to be with the family more than anything and that his nightmares and lack of food was making everything worse than it actually was. Still was a bit angry though, reaching for the rotting bird and trying to take it away. This made her brother freak out. Tried to get him to hunt after she relinquished the bird to him, but he refused, telling her to go away.

Told him he was delusional because he was starving himself and resigned herself to hunting for him. Pretty much ordered him not to sleep until she got back with a meal, and mentioned trying to bring him to HER Dreamworld, since she was still able to get there. As she left, he seemed to snap at her and say how she left like the rest of them, but ignored it. It was a lie. Her brother was merely going through a rough time and she would never desert him in his time of need.

Quickly hunted three squirrels and returned to her brother with them. Ordered him to eat and said she wouldn't leave until there was nothing left (but bones). When Jyoti seemed to be disinterested, complained to him that this was the best she could do right now, while also making a mental note to ask Shahla if she could be lead to Savera's world to hunt bigger game in the future. Also mentioned that she wanted to talk to Shahla about trying to get in contact with Leia, knowing full well if anyone knows about Nightmares, the white witch did.

Was again met with hostility. Was told not to bother, and that their white mother had abandoned him and his magic was gone. Still had no idea the truth of what went down in Elyria. For the first time, perhaps ever, bared her fangs at him. Told him never to say that about Leia, and that the white doe would never abandon them. Felt inside that she had actually feared that as well. Backtracked and questioned about his magic. Was told he couldn't call his fire, his stripes were fading and he couldn't access his Dreamworld. Had noticed as much, but blamed it on his weakened state. Was there something more that they did not know? (YEP SONALI IF YOU ONLY KNEW) Told him that she believed it was because he was weakened, and asked to explain it's effect on his dreamworld. Frustrated, continued to blame it on his hunger and focusing on the bad things. Ordered him to eat again.

Was yelled at, apparently having missed that he ate the squirrels. SKEPTICAL AS ALL HELL but decided that now was the time to leave him alone. Not wanting to get angry at him, and not wanting to get yelled at herself. Told him she would leave him alone for now and that he knew where to find her if needed. Retreated to her tree and crawled under the Guar pelt her mother left them and reveled in the Tigress' scent.

November 20th, 2015

Another unsuccessful night in the Dreamworld. Did however spend alot of time staring up at the stars of her family. Took to imagining what her younger siblings looked like. Knew very well that they were Shahla and Kio's, so just imagined some green stripey cutestuffs. Smiled at that. Hoped someday she could actually get to know them. She wasn't a very big sister to Circe, Tsahbi or Kitai, all three of them had outgrew her rather quickly, not to mention now they were all certainly towering over her. Well, she wasn't too sure about Circe. She had seen the doe from a distance, and while she was still towered over by Nikhil, there was still a possibility the Elyrian was still around her size.

When her experiments to hide her magic continued failing, took to practicing other magic. In the Dreamworld, she discovered that she had the ability to Mimic without being near another. So long as she thought of whom she wanted to Mimic, she was able to transform. With her magic under control, especially in the magic condensed Dreamworld, she had no fear of her magic killing her again. Went from a tiger, to a kitsune (thanks Kettu), to a white, cream, and gold version of Nikhil. Humored herself how she actually looked pretty freaking awesome this huge. But also didn't want to insult Nikhil (SONALI HE NOT EVEN THERE) so she quickly went back to normal.

Mimicked a multitude of other forest inhabitants, including her three mothers, before finally settling back down to spend time with her starry family. Looked at each one and told them how much she loved each one, especially those she never met, and possibly would never meet. Mental notes were made for her to hunt when she woke up (if there wasn't a meal waiting for her...). She was starting to feel HELLA embarrassed that her mother, Kettu, and Jyoti were practically keeping her alive at this point.

Awakened, finally, and much to her dismay, found more gifts at the mouth of her Den. Feeling more and more guilty now, if not downright paranoid. Her mothers scent was nearby, what did the Tigress think of this? Seeing how Nik and Shard acted toward the Kitsune, she was sure Shahla was less than please. On the verge of yet another breakdown, took the small boar to another tree and buried it. Waste of food...but she was too terrified her mother would continue to reject her. Did however, shove the blanket in the back of the den, lining the sides as a sort of insulation and giving her plenty of space.

Turned to hunt. She would hunt all day if she had to, to get things for her mother and family, Jyoti, and Kettu. Perhaps if she could prove to the three that she wasn't going to succumb to her sadness, and actually take care of herself, then she wouldn't have to feel so guilty. Decided to hunt near the birch, as she remember it being the most plentiful place for meals. Knew well to keep far enough away from her brothers locations.

But on her way to the birch, saw her brothers, Nikhil and Jyoti within close proximity of each other. Could not hear what they were saying, if they were indeed talking to each other. Watched, somewhat horrified, before darting in the other direction. If they were making up (likely story Sonny..), then she would be DAMNED to screw it up.

Focused on hunting, and was quick to find two squirrels. Made sure their deaths were quick, before holing them up in a tree for safe keeping. Apparently it's a really good day for squirrels. Must have hit a colony or something because she was able to snag four total. Went to shuffle around the first forest, and found yet ANOTHER squirrel. Figured they all seemed to be foraging for the winter months, but held no restraint. Would work to repay her mother, Kettu, and Jyoti.

With four squirrels in the tree, and one in her mouth, she felt pretty good about herself. She knew it was hardly a meal, but it had to mean SOMETHING. She had to drop the squirrel to dart after a sixth one. She ripped it from the tree it tried to escape up and ended it before it could feel more pain. Going back to the tree, stuck the last two squirrels in the hole and went to get a drink. Needed it after using up so much energy. Had to ignore a seventh squirrel as it scurried from the grass while she walked. Did however, pause to watch a frog hop by. Proceeded to end it as she had done with the squirrels. If not to eat, it could make a good gift right? Stored it nearby and proceeded to the pond again.

After gulping down cold water, found herself obligated to try to fish. Failed horribly. Kind of miserable at her inabilities to catch a fish, but at least she got some squirrels and a frog. Two frogs, because on her way back she found another one. Two frogs, 6 squirrels. yeah, that should do...for now. Passed a couple of squirrels and another frog on the way back to the tree, which she gathered up her catches and moved off to kettu's place because it was the closest. SO MANY DEER HERE. And a lot of babies. Kinda skirted around the kids and dropped off two squirrels.

Ran off, but was chased by two dear who cut her off. Kinda nervous at first, but seemed alright when they greeted her. (Lu and Akirayes?) Felt really awkward with her mouth laden with squirrels and a frog. Minor hyperventilating. DID NOTICE A CASSIE MAKING SURE SHE WAS OK, BUT DIDNT HAVE THE MOUTH TO SAY HI ILU CASS.

Wandered over to the old den, and saw Kio sleeping. Inched closer and dropped the gifts before the green doe before slightly rubbing on the old den to tell her mothers she had been there. Missed it's warmth. THEN RAN LIKE HELL BECAUSE SCURRED.

After she felt she was far enough away, plopped down in a blueberry patch and gorged herself on the sweet berries. They actually tasted kinda good slightly frozen.

AND SOLI WILL NEED TO UPDATE THIS LATER BECAUSE frejgoijisgeo;rljeisoigzl;ejro;lhsgjoir;

So then went to see Jyoti, seeing as the male had retreated from the talk with their older brothers. Darted to where she melt him, and found him sobbing in his makeshift den. Upon uttering his name, he squeaked and tried to hide himself. Inquired as to what happened, and was met with a resounding "nothing". EYEROLL. I NOUBETTERTHANTHATJYOTI :|

After finally getting him to talk a bit. Found out that apparently, Nik and Shard would no longer be around if they made amends with their mother. She didn't take this the way it had originally been intended by Nikhil, thinking it to be about their magic.

Sonali didn't even miss the opportunity. This was the best time to tell her brother her plan."I think...I know a way." She began, inching closer. "I've been working in the Dreamworld. Trying to figure out a way to either hide my magic or keep it from overflowing. Nothing so far has worked. If I could just...go back to Elyria maybe I can ask Mama Leia. I hate to do it. But we live here, and I don't want Nikhil and Shard to be hurt by us. If we can prevent it, we need to do it."

And was of course told exactly what they meant. But continued to say it was their (Sonali and Jyoti) obligation, whether they (Nik and Shard) liked it or not. Told her brother they would find a way, that they will prove to their family, all of them, that they wanted to be together. Was told that he had killed his brothers using magic, but was just as quick to say she used magic against them to. insisted they needed to move on and prove they would never do such horrible things again. Told him that crying wouldn't make anyone love him, and that no one would love her if she continued sitting in the den not eating. Asked him to try, considering how he and Kitai succeeded in trying to bring her back. They had to try to bring their family together.

Was yelled at, that he had a right to cry. Wasn't put off, especially when he immediately apologized. Agreed that he did, and told him she wasn't upset. Told him, again, they needed to try, and that she was trying to be strong but she needed him, they needed each other. Was told that she didn't need him, and that he was scared he was keeping their mother away. AGAIN SAID they would make it work. STOPPING TOPIC NAO :| Lots of head rubbing to comfort him.

Then Jyoti began rubbing paste on his legs and was too distracted to ask where he got it from. Asked if he fell, and was told no. he didn't want to tell her truth, and she knew...but she decided to let it go. So just groomed him instead. it was comforting to her and she hoped it was as comforting for him. After as period of silence, felt a little humored enough to tease him about how he needed to take better care of himself. But then had it thrown in her face because she's a hypocritical kitten. :|

"I'm fine, Sonali, really. You need to take care of yourself. Have you even hunted yet?"

GDI Jyoti I'm trying to be the big little sister here.

Continued grooming him while she spoke, admitting she hunted six squirrels and two frogs, having give Kettu two squirrels and a frog and the rest were left for their family at the old den. Jyoti seemed sad, commenting how he was going to avoid Kettu as he did not want other scents on him or the den as he didn't want the family to avoid it. Said she felt bad for Kettu because the Kitsune meant well, but ultimately agreed. Did however say they SHOULD at least tell her what was going on though, to avoid hurting their friend. Said they needed to do it sooner or later, but Jyoti commented he would rather her come to them, as it might upset their mother if they actively sought Kettu out. Somewhat agreed and dropped the subject for now.

AND THEN A NIKHIL. Was pressed up against the tree, trying to show she wasn't a threat. Nik asked Jyoti to follow him, herself included. Was a bit scared at first, considering what Jyoti had told her before, but ultimately followed her older brothers down to the pond.

And then had their first conversation. It was pretty much apologies from both sides, and Sonali saying he had nothing to be sorry for, as Nikhil went about tending to Jyoti's legs. Went on to listen to the two talk, and Jyoti finally explaining what happened to his legs. Felt a bit sick about it, mostly because she really had no idea how poorly he really had been doing. Nik apologized again, and commented that Jyoti should confide in her, before he was getting to his hooves and saying he would check on them again soon and to have a goodnight. Jyoti thanked him and said goodnight as well, but Sonali could no longer control herself. Shot up as he left, and called out.

"Goodnight Niki." She called out to him. "I love you." She did not expect a reply, but she wanted him to know what she did love him, now and forever, no matter what.

"I... love y'too, Sonny."

Niki Ran, Sonali exploded and had to be brought back to Jyoti's den to be taped back together by her brother.

Lots, and lots of inner screeching and happy Sonalisplosions as she tried to sleep against her brother.

November 19th, 2015

After another long night within her Dreamworld with no success on her experiments, the Golden finally awakened. She had at somepoint throughout the night moved the furs Kettu had left her, feeling somewhat guilty to indulge in the kitsune's scent. having died at a time where she was still used to sleeping with her sisters Circe and Tsabhi, the longing to feel a warm body next to her was undeniably strong. The furs would have to do, and she knew that eventually the kitsune's scent would wear off.

Moved outside and found a few mice sitting at the entrance of her den that had been covered by a dusting of snow. Ignored the cold white stuff for the moment and glared at the corpses. Got very irritated, having thought her brother was trying to feed her again. Was about to ignore them and stalk off to find the male to lecture him about how she was old enough to hunt on her own and that he needed to focus on himself, but noted the scent that lingered on them; her mother. Time seemed to stand still, and in her minds eye she went back in time to where she had caught her first mouse. She remembered her mother's proud gaze as she succeeded, and how Sonali herself had saved that skeleton to remember that day.

As time resumed, Sonali once again had a mental break down. Returning to her den to avoid being detected by wandering ears, she sobbed loudly for a time until she realized that she was hungry and she'd be damned to ignore the meal. Slinked outside to retrieve the mice and retreated into her den. Each mouse was eaten slowly, relishing the familiar flavor and even going so far as to nose the fur that touched her mothers lips. She had half a mind just to keep the one that smelled the most like her, but her den would become infested by flies and maggots and she was far too clean a feline to let that happen. Saved every single bone from the mice, picked clean to ensure a healthy den, and proceeded to make a little cubby within her den to keep her treasures. While it likely might not have been intended, Sonali considered this a sort of gift. Anything from her mother would be cherished, and perhaps at this point, downright worshiped.

Took to sitting in the entrance of her den with her head just slightly out of the mouth, allowing some snow to fall on her eyelashes and nose. Fallen into some sort of daydream where she relieved her memories where she bounded with her family. But added to these memories were visions of Shard and Nik. Everyone was happy.

Snapped out of it when Nik and Shard were like NOT VISIONS BUT RIGHT THERE. Sorta panicked and startled and scrambled back into her den while in a submissive posture. Remained true to her heart though, there would be no chasing them away. Nik left one way, and Shard came back around near the edge of the pond. It seemed he paused to look at her, and she only looked down to avoid his gaze. When his hoofbeats left, sort collapsed into a relieved pile. HAD NO FREAKIN IDEA THAT NIK DEFENDED JYO FROM KORMIR! SOLI WHY THE HELL DID YOU TAB OUT AT THAT MOMENT JFC

Then player had to AFK because phone call and kitten being up in my facial region so Sonali fell asleep.

Tabbed back in to see MOMMY COME OVER AND SNIFF AND NUZZLE AND SOLI FELT ALL THE FEELS. GDI EMS.

November 18th, 2015

Woke up late in the day, haven't spent hours experimenting in the Dreamworld. Even though her body was rested, her mind was fuzzy from all the work she was trying to get done. For someone who had little knowledge over her own powers, and for having never actually played around with them before, began to find some interesting things about herself. She was sure the way to fix her relationship with Nikhil and Shard lay within herself, in her Dreamworld. What, however, was another story entirely and she had a feeling her body would be old enough to have fawns of her own by the time that happened. But time didn't matter in the Forest either. Some grew old and died, but her mother was just as ageless as the day she was born. Sonali could only hope she had the same luck.

Since sleep was out of reach, she stood and began wandering around, mouth laden with fish bones and scales from her meal the night before. She had forgotten to ask her mother if she could return to the den (unknowing if the den was even in use anymore), but also figured it was probably too close to her brothers and she did not want them freaking out at her presence again. Not to mention their presence deeply unnerved her as well.

The search for a den was stressful, as it seemed her brothers presences were always near where she happened to find a decent tree. She wanted her own place, at least temporarily, so that she didn't feel so lost. The playground was a sort of off-limits place, she felt, and as much as she loved sitting under the ramp-like rock, she couldn't mark her territory there.

After what seemed like forever, when it was only probably after 15 minutes of searching, found a large tree near the pond. She wasn't sure if it was taken already, but it didn't seem like it. She immediately rubbed her scent all over it, even going so far as to nick her knees and bleed on the bark a bit. This was, for now, her place. Even if this would be her new home now, she'd welcome anyone near it. She wasn't so much territorial despite her tiger heritage, and perhaps she also hoped this would be temporary. She sat down and began to dig. The tree was large enough with wide enough roots to provide her a dry home should it rain. She might even rope Jyoti into adding foliage at the bottom to make a sort of awning above the mouth of her den like the ones in Elyria.

She vowed to herself then and there that her family would be welcome here. Nik and Shard included. She would bend over backwards for the two of them, and somewhere deep in her mind she felt pathetic that she wanted to kiss their hooves so badly. It was truly all to get closer to her mother again, which made her feel sick to her stomach, but she knew that that would never happen now, unless Nikhil and Shard did something incredibly stupid. She was sure that wouldn't happen. Nik, while wild in his own right, did have a good head on his shoulders. She was proud at how he protected their mother, and she was envious that she wasn't bigger to do the same. And then there was Shard. She had always considered Shard the more skittish one of the two, inwardly smiling at how that was almost how she felt about herself and Jyoti as kids, but Shard had come such a long way. He was a strong stag, and even though she was sure it pained him greatly to be near her, he stuck to his guns and tried to keep her away. She envied him too, because while she could be vicious in her own right, deep down she truly had no strength to hurt anyone (at least physically).

Had to pause her digging to break down again. Wishing to the gods that she wasn't so stupid in the past and let her magic get out of control. Wishing she could go back and erase her brothers deaths, erase Jyoti's rage, erase... There was no changing the past. She had to be strong, like Jyoti, and move on. She would embrace her family if they welcomed her back, and she would not reject them if they in turn rejected her in the end. She vowed that no matter what, not an ounce of her magic would ever harm her family again, and she would never turn her hooves on blood. Never.

Resuming digging, she ignored the dirt covering her pale form. The kinda fell asleep like that. Because Soli had to AFK. During that time, Kettu came over and brought some fish and berries. KETTU WHY U SO NICE ;O;

Sonali woke up (because player finally got back from being a dozey doo), and she was about to go back to digging when she noticed a fish and berries near her. Jyoti's fresh scent lingered, and at first thought he was feeding her again. Mildly irritated for a moment, but then realized the scent around the fish and berries was in fact Kettu's. Felt her heart ache some. Her family did not seem to like the kitsune, and in Sonali's eyes, the vixen was nothing but kind. If she truly knew her mothers opinion of the fox, then Sonali probably would understand, but at the moment it seemed that they had no real reason to treat Kettu harshly.

Ate the fish and berries both, halfheartedly, mostly doing so because Kettu had been so kind to give the meal to her in the first place. Didn't exactly want to eat, but knew it was essential if she wanted to live. Death was painful. Saved more scales and fish bones and stored them in the corner of her den. Was going to be stocking up on random items, as she will need a mix of things if her experiments were going to have any hope of working. It was tedious, portaling items from the forest to the Dreamworld, which was partially why she slept so much now.

After a while longer of digging, settled herself inside. Decided to let Jyoti have his space by now. And if she freakin knew he wasn't eating she'd get all hypocritical on his ass :I

November 17th, 2015

Awakened feeling slightly better, though still rather lost. Noted some faint, familiar scents (Kalidas), but Jyoti was sitting there. Engaged in conversation with him, and it was the same as it has been. Return to mother. Go to mother. Leave me. Honestly couldn't bring herself to do so, expressing her fear of Nikhil and Shardul. Was told they couldn't touch her because of her magic, and while she slightly agreed, she knew if they wanted to hurt her they would regardless, and at the same time, wished that she wouldn't hurt them unintentionally.

Vaguely remembered the time where she and Nikhil had smiled at one another and declared their familial love for one another. Felt it strike a painful cord in her heart. The fear they all felt for one another was just plain awful...how could they ever fix that? Pressed against her brother, promising him that she would go to the family alone...just as he wanted. Made sure to spend as much time with him as she could, as it was unlikely that after she was rebonded to the family (if she was anyway), that she would be forbidden from seeing her brother. At least, that was how she saw it.

Dozed off for a while, but then upon awakening immediately sought out her family since Jyoti was not there. Felt pangs of sadness the farther from Jyoti she became, but knew this was what he wanted...and that she needed to tell her mother what her brother had done to bring her back.

Huddled by a tree to watch from a reasonable distance, and it wasn't long before Nik and Shard rose. Contemplated fleeing then and there, but if it came down to it, if they wanted to...she deserved any pain they would inflict upon her. Desperately wanted her mother to rise and maybe tell her sons to back off just a little bit, but wouldn't count on it at this stage of reintroduction.

Felt extremely uncomfortable from their staring, but wondered if her own expression made them feel the same way. Wished there was some way to make it less awkward.

Shard moved a bit closer and proceeded to mark the trees near the families new den. Ignored it for the most part, but took it almost as an invisible "do not pass" barrier. Really had no intention to get much closer, at least until her mother awakened. Mildly irritated that her older brothers were sort of guard dogs now. Felt the slightest bit of jealousy that her newest siblings had the protection and guidance of her older brothers but that was truly no fault of theirs. Their births were completely different circumstances, and her own birth caused pain to her older siblings no matter how unintentional.

Was charged by Nikhil, but stood her ground. Both of them seemed irritated, and she could really only feel sadness and pity for them. Hearing Nik's words "Love you Sonny" rang in her ears. She wanted to run away, to give them peace, but knew that she had to talk to her mother, even if just for a short while.

Moved forward slowly, which in turn caused Shard to back away. Hesitated. Did not want to hurt him, HATED IT! Wished she could just shut her magic down for a little bit but knew it would kill her. Nik ran back to herd one of their siblings back, and Shard turned to mark trees again. Took that moment to move forward a few more paces, only to have Shard return and Nik charge. Luckily it seemed that Shard was trying to keep Nik from attacking, or at least away from her. Silently thanked him for that, thought she had a sinking feeling that he was only hurting himself.

A sibling called, and was quick to answer. Nik did NOT like that. Could practically see the anger in his eyes as she looked at him sadly. None of this was supposed to happen.

Retreated, signaling them to stay there. Went down into the Forest and plucked as many large poppies as she could. She knew they could help against pain, and she knew she did some to her brothers. Brought them back, but her mother seemed to finally get up. After Shahla moved closer and passed, took the hint that the tigress wanted to move. Gave her brothers one last sad glance before following after her mother.

Finally, FINALLY had a conversation with the Tigress. Alone and without her brothers, or anyone really, to interfere. Started the conversation by offering her mother the poppies to help with Nik and Shards injuries as she was sure she caused them some due to her magic. Said that she wanted to see her mother, though that was only a tidbit of what she really wanted to say. The Tigress seemed apprehensive, and Sonali could see it. She had to prove her realness. Told her mother about the powers her brothers Jyoti and Kitai performed to bring her back, even going so far as to apologize profusely for dying in the first place. It didn't seem like Shahla believed at first, and she even seemed a bit distraught over the fact it took so long. Sonali was quick to defend her brothers, telling her mother that the duo had in fact tried before, but failed because they did it alone. It was only together that they succeeded.

Commented that she wanted things back the way they were, but better. With Nik and Shard, not with them at legs length away like before. It seemed to pain Shahla to tell Sonali that it didn't seem possible, and Sonali felt saddened to have her fears realized. Was also told that it would take time, patience and respect, and Sonali quickly agreed. She wanted to give that to her family.

Was also told that Circe was not doing well. Felt disheartened at that, and felt an incredible maternal need to comfort her sister. Remembered how her brothers did not seem to allow Circe to even look at her. Commented about such, tumbling over her words about her brothers, trying not to paint them in a negative light, failing, but then recovering. Got distressed when asking a favor, taking it back and trembling as she apologized, and standing hunched over submissively. Said she'd find away, and told her mother how everyone was in the Dreamworld, how they were all together even if they were apart.

After a bit, was told that the tigress would speak to Circe, to let her know that Sonali (and Jyoti?) wanted to see and speak to her. During this time, was given a subtle touch of affection. Quickly thanked her mother for offering, leaning against the touch to show how much she appreciated it. Purred.

Finally decided to take her leave, declaring that she wouldn't keep her mother from her family. Thanked her, and reiterated that she wanted her mother to make sure her older brothers were alright. Told her mother she loved her, nosing her mothers chest before taking her leave, but not after receiving a shaky 'i love you' in return. Cherished it. Went to a tree near the playground, breaking down for a short while to let out her emotions.

Cried herself to sleep, and awakened in the Dreamworld. Sat staring skyward, watching the stars of her family twinkle. Smiled, and stayed there the entire time she slept.

Awakened a long while later to the scent of fish. Noted a fish before her, and Jyoti's lingering scent. Felt guilty, mostly because she somehow felt she should be catering to him, and here he was, feeding her. Managed a few nibbles, having not eaten anything since her return. Then quickly realized that she was no good starving, so forced herself to eat the whole thing. Did save a few bones and scales though, maybe she could give them to Nik and Shard as a peace offering. Hell she'd probably need to drag and entire guar herd to her brothers in order to actually speak.

Started getting some weird ideas, thinking about her younger sister Tsabhi. Out of all the siblings, the little tiger was no where to be seen. Knew she was alive...or at least hoped as much, judging on the blue star that was her sister in the Dreamworld. Recalled how her sister had gotten a charm to keep her magic from hurting their brothers. Could that work? Was there a possibility that if she could show she meant no harm, MAYBE they would talk to her and Jyoti again.

Feeling like there was a shred of hope, once again succumbed to sleep to work within the Dreamworld.

November 16th, 2015

Woke up from her dream, and found her brother Jyoti presenting her with a wreath of twigs and blueberries. Thanked him for it and it seemed he was surprised she woke up just then. Was going to initiate conversation about what happened in the dreamworld, but was interupted by the scents of her mother, Nik and Shard nearby. Rose and turned to face her mother, wide-eyed and wary.

Walked REALLY slowly towards her, often stopping to look at Nik and Shard, unsure if they would barrel into her to get her away from their mother. Stopped for a while to peer back helplessly as Nik and Shard harassed Kettu. Wished she could break away to help the kitsune, but had a sinking feeling it would NOT go over well with her brothers, and definitely not with her mother. Could only hope Kettu understood the look in her glowing eyes. "I'd help you, but I can't right now..."

Got close enough to her mother to sniff, but immediately backed away. Alot of hunched, submissive poses, and tail between the legs. Did not make any quick movements at all, even with her head as she observed her brothers reactions to Kettu.

Was finally able to really give her mother her entire focus, though noticing that Jyoti was slowly moving away. It absolutely broke her heart, but she would keep her promise, and hoped he would do the same. Sniff sniff, got some sniffs back. Progress? Maybe. Couldn't stop taking in her mothers scent, flared nostrils, deep breaths, remembering, reminiscing. Her childhood had been stolen away by her very own magic, but she had so many wonderful memories. She even truly cherished the bad ones. As she had told her brother, there was no light without darkness, no darkness without light.

Actually came in contact with her mothers fur a few, brief times. Although brief, melted at her touch, shivering from the contact she thought she had forgotten. No, how could she forget her lifegiver? Fought hard to keep her tears at bay, her apologetic words. Did not want it to be like this at all. Wanted everything to be better. To forgive her brothers, and to be forgiven. For them to forgive Jyoti, and for him to forgive them. Knows that it's possible, but the probability was likely very low, at least right now.

Did not care how long she would have to stand there, being sniffed, possibly prodded, circled. Just wanted her mother to SEE her, and know that she was true, back from the dead. But then Shahla moved off (and I THINK she mooed? I tabbed out really quick to write and then MOO :< ) Watched her mother move off a bit, was she looking at Jyoti? Felt her gut grow sour. Prayed to the Light that everything would be okay...if just for a little while...that maybe...just maybe, Jyoti could tell her what he and Kitai did. At the thought of her tiger brother, she looked under the rockface to see him still snoozing. Cautiously followed her mother, stepping loudly to alert the tigress that she was indeed following a ways behind.

Placed herself by the last rock on the playground as her mother looked to Jyoti. Trembled in fear and anticipation, hoping that Nik and Shard wouldn't come out of no where and trample their brother. As Jyoti said, they were in their right to do so, but she just...she couldn't lose her brothers. Not again. Not anymore.

Was absolutely RELIEVED when the interaction between her mother and Jyoti seemed to go well. Shahla left, but not after giving the siblings a nod of approval. Not sure if it can be taken as acceptance yet, but its so much better than nothing.

Noticed Shard and other figures in the distance, moved closer and felt her heart skip a beat when she saw Circe. Moved a bit closer to stare, ears perked. Was contemplating how quick to move over, but Nik showed up and moved himself in front of Circe. Backed off a few paces. She did not stand a chance against her older brothers. Wished she could tell Circe how much she loved her, but it didn't seem that it would happen at this time.

Turned to go back to the little 'cave' in the playground, because she feared getting charged again. Sat down, feeling much better.

Sat and slept there for the rest of the day, only rising to groom Jyoti or to follow him where she watched as he interacted with their older brothers. Nothing seemed to go well with those two, and she honestly couldn't blame either of her three brothers.

Spaced out until she realized the conversation was over and followd her brother to the oak. He seemed upset. Decided to just groom him which in turn made her fall asleep for the night. The Dreamworld was waiting.

November 15th, 2015

Entered the forest after recovering from her rebirth.
Anxious, excited, and nervous at the same time.
Sticking to her brothers like glue.

2 and a half hours later...

OHGODDDDD

----
(Note: Kitai is ICly with them. His player had to leave for the night.)
Finally in the forest, called for family. They were nearby, with some others. Immediately understood that she now had younger siblings, the stars from her Dreamworld.

Went to greet Kio who seemed to be staring at her. Got the guts to move forward for some seemingly awkward sniffing. But felt relieved when she was nuzzled. kio retreated, and her mother moved closer.

Shard was there. Didn't really want to get much closer with him there, slightly confused as to why he was so close to their siblings. Perhaps he and Niki had redeemed themselves? Willing to let bygones be bygones, but with Jyoti with her, was afraid her older brother would get attacked. So took it slowly, despite how much she wanted to dive into her mothers fur.

Got real close. Kinda let Shard ands Jyoti have their staring contest, her focus on her mother. Did however, keep an ear perked in their direction.

"Mommy its me I swear ;;"'s faces and tried to nuzzle. REEALLY AWKS.

Noticed Shard trying to shoo Jyoti? turned back to her brothers and tried to tell her older brother that Jyoti wasn't bad, that it was he and Kitai that brought her back.

Stria came out from no where and seemed to be mock charging them. Confusion. Why?

Nothing went according to plan. Was pretty much run off by Shard, and Shahla nor Kio did anything to stop him. Extremely hurt by the reception. Pretty much openly wept by the Twins when Jyoti finally joined her after seemingly trying to apologize for past wrongdoings. Apparently it's alright if Nik and Shard do that, but not Jyoti and herself.

Was joined by Kettu, and was glad to get a nuzzle from the kitsune. At least someone seemed truly happy to see her....

Followed her brother even after his attempts to herd her away. Proceeded to tell him she wouldn't leave him, and had a conversation that lasted a while. Was told that she needed to go back to their mother without him, but couldn't find herself able to do so. He had helped bring her back for gods sake! As the conversation progressed, came to the realization that her mothers expression seemed to look through her. Was this what happened to her mother after grieving? Did they not believe she was even there? Felt a bit distraught at this, but did not share her worries with her brother, figuring that he was already in pain from being chased away so.

Sat under the playground and was joined by Kettu and someone new, Rossamund. tried to put a smile on for the flat-faced buck, and managed a small one. Invited him to sit despite honestly just wanting to cry on her brother alone. Kettu sat besides her and silently reveled in having someone on each side of her...she had always liked sitting between family members, even if Kettu was not exactly family. Still, appreciated that they seemed to realize and understand that she was indeed real, and hope tomorrow she would have the guts to confront her striped mother and tell her everything that had transpired after her untimely death. Ross had rose and left, only to return and offer her and her brothers flowers. Teared up at the gifts and accepted them, keeping them tucked between her forelegs. Much thank sweet Ross ;;

Jyoti said some things that scared her, which mostly consisted of him accepting his fate should the family, including Nik and Shard, come to attack him. Made him promise that he won't die. Feared she would never be able to do what he had done for her.

Was approached by yet another, Vox. A little intimidated, but he seemed nice considered he greeted her warmly. Invited him to sit as well, as he seemed to know Kettu and Ross. Sat back down and coddled the flowers, childishly pretending they were her missing family members.

And then got disconnected and reconnected and then this happened from Blades end:



And then:

[3:09:18 AM] Sen: lol
[3:09:23 AM] Sen: Sonali u aged fast

GDI TEF.

Sept 19th, 2014

After a dreamless night, woke up with Kio still besides her. Though awake, still kept herself perfectly still and curled up as if she were a newborn. But a little later, Kio left. Went over the events of last night in her mind and was also blasted by other thoughts that had been plaguing her.

Tsa's absense had caused a huge rift in the family. Although it seemed there was some re-acceptance, the fight before bed seemed to put an even worse damper down on it. Although Sonali herself was of course resentful towards Tsa that she was hardly ever around, couldn't find it in her heart to simply cast her away. Doesn't think the rest of her family is like that either, but came to the conclusion this distance is to keep them from hurting from her absence; wishes she could do that herself because her heart was absolutely in shreds now. Though she had spoken to Tsa about her staying with the family form now on, is not confident she will do so. She seemed comfortable where she was, and now with all this tension Sonali was certain that Tsa would probably avoid coming near again. She could only hope that everyone would just sit down and talk and figure out what was going on because this pain was far too much.

^Sonali what is your mind doing child?

Somewhere along thinking about how much she wanted Tsa to simply rejoin the family and have everything be alright again, started thinking about another issue; her older half-siblings. It's been knowing to her for a while that she somehow affects them negatively, but only recently did she realize what exactly that was. While she doesn't know of their Dark Magic, she knows full well now that her own Light Magic is the cause of their plight when near her. Ever since that day when Shard had been active weird, and Nik and Jyoti had been playing near the ruins, that Sonali started to get ideas. Not so much idea's perhaps, but more questions to her mother. She did not know how to get to Elyria herself to speak to her White Mother about something that could shield her magic so she no longer hurt her siblings without hurting herself. By now Sonali fully understood that her magic was very much who she was, and at even the slightest inkling that something was amiss with her magic did she find herself terrified (this usually happened in the Dreamworld during nightmares). Her only hope to fixing this issue was her White Mother, but how to convince Mama to let her go back?

Kept herself curled up outside of the den, pretending to be asleep. (I periodically AFK so if I "ignore you" I apologize now.)

Sept 18th, 2014

Sleepy day. Earlier in the morning, was trying to find Kio but couldn't locate her, so ended up wandering until she found Zev sleeping by himself. Felt a little bad for him, so sat nearby until keeling over herself. Unsure when he woke up, but when she did she was surrounded by this:



Honestly the silliest bunch in the forest she had ever met in her entire life. Honestly could not imagine her life without them. Got up to smoosh herself between Sha and Viktor to dance with them. The suddenly everyone fell asleep. Sam came in there somewhere but Soli is dumb and didn't have Sonali go over to play and then Lilu and Sam left

Later on after many afk's:



_{Circe and Jyoti were there but I didn't get a screenie with them apparently, and I gyazo everything on TEF xD}

[9/18/2014 8:38:16 PM] Soli: Circe why are you not part of our love train
[9/18/2014 8:45:57 PM] Brit N: that
[9/18/2014 8:45:59 PM] Brit N: looks nothing like a train
[9/18/2014 8:46:15 PM] Soli: its a Booty Pillow train

Then later on, a familiar face appeared, Tsa! But what the HECK happened to your face. Skirted around her numerous times, quite literally sniffing her all over, particularly around her missing eye. Has no idea what in the heck happened, but all the child knew is that her sister was hurt and didn't seem at all mesmerized by it. Not to mention the rest of the family didn't seem to notice. Tried to poke Shahla awake. (It gets a bit fuzzy here because Soli is the Queen of AFK).

Later later. After Tsa cuddles, and napping some more, turned to see a brown deer sitting with her sister and another fawn. There was ALOT of tension. Judging by Mama's behavior or lack-therof (because I really can't remember much c_c;;; ) kinda took the hint not to go near the male. Then Tsa ran off and the male ran off after her. Bolted after them. Tried to check on Tsa but suddenly Jyoti came in like a bat out of hell and tried to drive the male away. Utter confusion. And then in came Sha. Tsa ran off yet again so bolted after her, not without looking over her shoulder and praying whatever happened no one was getting hurt.

Found Tsa in the birch.

[3:20:12 AM] Farelia: Says thank you seestur
[3:20:16 AM] Farelia: am love you muchness
[3:21:12 AM] Soli: ;; Sonali's like "Loves you too sissy you come back more kay?"
[3:21:46 AM] Farelia: "Am never leave again... Keep getting losts, snot fun..."
[3:22:21 AM] Soli: "Use nose, sniff Mama Never get losts again."
[3:23:00 AM] Farelia: "Gots head hurts, makes sniffing things hard. But will try, dank yoo seestur."

Kio came over and with her help, managed to coax Tsa back over to the family. The others did not seem very receptive at that point. Tried her absolute hardest to get Tsa to come closer when she paused. Could sense insecurity. Desperately wanted everyone to just talk about what was going on, but a huge chicken. FInally Tsa got closer. It was mostly a divided group: Sha, Jyoti and Circe in one, and Kio, Sonali and Tsa in another. Mostly just shaking ever so slightly and lots of shifty eyes and confused expressions. SONALI WHY ARE YOU SUCH A DERP.

And then after a bit, Mama came around and gave Tsa occasional sniffs. This went on for a little longer, but then it turned into Sha standing over Tsa. Almost fell over, relieved. Then family snuggles.

But unfortunately, as soon as Sha meandered back to the den to sleep, leaving the cubs with Kio, Jyoti got up and stomped off. Proceeded to chase after him. Then he tried to herd at her (actually it was at Tsa but Sonali took it personally yo.) Started arguing with him via TEF emotes because watching two kids taunt at each other was HIIIIIILARIOUS. Kept following her brother and arguing with him until they ended up in front of Sinon. Realized her brother still had a bone to pick with the male. Tried desperately to get him to follow her with Tsa and go back to Mama Kio.

Nope.

Fight just broke out. Mostly just screaming and shrieking occurred between three confused siblings and an irritated feather stag. Tried very hard to break up the fight and did manage to at some points, but there was no calming the raging Firefly. Yelled at both Sinon and Jyoti. You adult no hurt kids! You kid...you no fight at all. /hypocrite. So this is how it must have felt to the others when she and Circe were spelling Kyr that day... Not even sobbing could stop him it seemed. It wasn't until Tsa took refuge under Sinon and after Jyoti gave up trying to get her out did he spit venom and leave.

"Not sister."

Was simply too distraught over her brother fighting with a stag, and her sister staying with said stag. Resented her brother for attacking as he did, and also her sister who at the moment seemed to favor others over her family. With Kios help, moved off after Jyoti. Cast a tearful look back at her sister, heart sinking, before moving faster.

Jyoti took refuge inside the den. Felt it was best not to join him. Curled up next to Mama Kio and pressed into her side. Hid her face in her legs and made herself as small as she could be. Fell alseep there, eventually.

Sept 17th, 2014

Something happened on this day but this is Soli who can't update for her life.

Sept 16th, 2014

Lazy day. Slept near Mama Kio and Shoebox most of the day, and climbed onto her head later on.

Aaaand later got up to find Circe with Nik playing. Kinda watched from a distance until Nik invited her close. Was super happy and joined in. Jyoti joined a bit later.

[8:55:50 PM] Torn: "Hey, Sonny?" the stag called, and the nickname came from his lips naturally. "I love you, lil sis."
[8:57:01 PM] Soli: "Love you too Niki!" The golden fawn beamed, though there was pain lingering in her eyes. She was bound and determined to fix the issue of magic that kept them from spending some real time together.

Then he left, sadly.

Relaxed with Circe and Jyoti. The Mama showed up somewhere. AND THEN STRIA, WOOO. Loved on sister-not-sister and played around. Then random afks because skype.

Sept 15th, 2014

Slept by the tree near Nik and Shard all night. Upon waking, noticed Kettu besides her. Snuggled the pretty fox lady who always seems to find her and keep her warm and loved. Turned to where her brothers were sleeping and noted Shard had gone and Nik turned into a crow. Contemplated trying to figure out how to turn her brother back into his normal self but settled she would likely just hurt him and she really didn't want to give Mama a reason to flog her soooo ixnay and amscray on that idea.

Then a little while later noticed Mama looking KINDA SCURRY. Shuffled away from Kettu and covered Mama with all of the love and nuzzles. Dun worry Mama, I love you the mostest! Followed Sha a few yard away and settle down there. Mama fell asleep, fell asleep herself (Soli got noms), and then suddenly Viktor. OHAI VIKTOR! Set herself between Viktor and Mama and gave them both cuddles. And then Viktor fell asleep.

Mama Kio showed up. Bounced around with her parents and turned Mama into a peacock. Then she sads. NO MAMA NO SADS!

[2:13:41 PM] Missoli-nious: "Mama its okay you make a pretty tiger peacock"

Gave Mama nuzzles, then followed her parents when they ran off. Scented Jyoti. Called for him a few times, in different voices because Mama Kio kept giving her different masks. Jyoti finally came over, then engaged in a spellfight. Mama made Jyoti sads by giving him doe nubs. Came to the rescue and gave him Ram horns. Yeaaahh das rite. Then settled with her parents and brother (then Sha left because Ems had to gooo).

Nik came over at some point and ACTUALLY stuck around and played with Sonali, who was absolutely thrilled and all sorts of happy highs. While it didn't last all that long, still couldn't believe that he actually played around with her AND nuzzled her. Maybe even teared up a bit.

Lazed about the rest of the day with family in the flowers. At some point DID learn how to roll in the flowers by Kio to cover her scent in case someone was trying to go after her. Useful knowledge. Napped for a long while, was awakened to find Nik...playing...with...JYOTI. Jaw hit the floor. Probably would have start crying from happiness. Played with them both for a while, then noticed Nik go off. Unaware of the trouble they caused their brothers, though noticed they were both acting weird, especially when Nik came back and Shard seemed to collapse. They left after a while, and climbed on everyones head.

And then:

[11:23:16 PM] Emseh: Sonali
[11:23:21 PM] Emseh: you always have to be the best at everything
[11:23:48 PM] Brit N: LOL
[11:24:02 PM] Brit N: she is best at everything tho
[11:24:13 PM] Emseh: um no mother is
[11:24:15 PM] Missoli-nious: LOL
[11:24:18 PM] Brit N: LMFAO
[11:24:21 PM] Emseh: don't forget it or floggings for a week
[11:24:21 PM] Missoli-nious: Mather*

Fell asleep on the antlers after a while, but have a shoutout Stria because I saw you just as I was goin to bed!

Sept 14th, 2014

Mostly spent the morning cuddled with Kettu. Nik was there but disappeared at some point. Then continued to spend the rest of the day snuggled with Mama and Jyoti. Did give Mama sexy man antlers and climbed into them, then slid onto her back for a while. Just flat out alot of sitting.. Noticed some others nearby but sorta sticking like glue to family today.

Later on Circe showed up, so got up to play with her sister and try to give mama dainty antlers but ended up turning her into Kio antlers. Play fought with her sister and mother a bit before Mama and Circe moved off some. Joined them with Jyoti near.

Ran off after Mama who seemed to be searching for something, which inevitably sparked a spell fight. Successfully peacocked mini Mama. awwwwwyis And then drew Jyoti and eventually Eve into it. Got Eve the mask and antlers but failed repeatedly getting the pelt.

[12:26:44 AM] Missoli: EVE BEING ALL SMUG A BUNCH OF BABIES CANT SUCCESSFULLY PEACOCK HER
[12:26:45 AM] Missoli: Bc
[12:26:57 AM] jd: BAHAHAHAHA

And then finally got it and /sass

Ran back to mama and saw she was sitting on a tree above Jyoti. Joined her up there as well as Eve and Circe. Jyoti was likely giving them glares from below.



Crawled down after a while and sat with Jyoti and Circe for a while. After everyone had left however, pulled a Nikhil and wandered over to where Nik and Shard had chosen to sit for the past few days. Kept her distance of course and curled up next to a tree. Felt that maybe mimicking her brothers actions would be a way to show her affection without harming them. Fell asleep quite soon after (because TEF breaks sometimes so I refreshed it. <3)

Sept 13th, 2014

Got up and went off to find Stria and went to go back to sleep cuddled up with her. Got up after a while later, Stria was awake so snuggled a bit closer. Then suddenly ROMPFEST. Chased her friend and played and bounded and pretty much everything through the forest. Had a grand old time. Stria hid behind a tree and started a game of peek-a-boo. Went ahead and tried to poke her tail as they went around the tree. Was given nubs by a random deer and went to bonk Stria a bit. More running around but it ended up in facing each other and then heading heads at each other at the same time. Lots of giggles then Stria sat down. Proceeded to plop next to her sister-not-sister and snuggled her.

Sept 12th, 2014

Woke up and immediately went to find Mama Kio. Found her with Vala and she had shrunk. Or did Sonali get bigger. AHHHH. Sat with her stepmom.

Got up because recognized Rota nearby (though Soli was confused because Alice was glitched on her screen with someone elses picto e-e). Followed her around regardless and tried to initiate some play of course. Someone spelled the poor fawn and noticed that Rota did not seem to like it all that much. Was invited by Alice to follow her and Rota into the lower birch. Ridera was there too. Then big cat lady (Umay) came over to nuzzle Ridera then left. Questionmark?

Then called over by Mama, so got up super fast and said a quick goodbye to her new friends before goig over. HOLY MINI MAMA'S AHHH. Laughed hard at the fact they were both suddenly tiny, but then was turned into a rabbit by Mama. Ran around, giving them a run for their money. Turned back into a bae and was all "Das rite, I da best. /zsnaps" And then started dancing with them because yes.

Lots of play fighting and spell spamming and laughing and playing and FAMILLYYYY

Then sleep because SOli had to go out food shopping.

Woke up to Nikhil there, so slid next to Circe to stare at him because she didnt want to scare him away. Was happily surprised when he got up to nuzzle her, so of course returned the affection. Then plopped back next to her sister. Jyoti didnt seem to approve tho. And then more sleep because Circe is super cuddly and Soli had a migraine.

Sept 11th, 2014

Woke up at the den,a little disgruntled. Nudged the gift Tickles Indigo gave her further into the nook she made for her treasure. Stuck her head out of the den with a sigh and scented Zev near by, along with other scents including Isa's. Found him with Isa of course, but also with a skull-faced doe (Alice), her fawn Rota, and another fawn Uyi. Later on Shard and another mini fawn showed up (as well as some others.

Bounced around with Rota and Uyi, trying to get Zev, Isa, and Shard into it but none of them seemed to want to. Isa seemed to get getting upset at something. Not sure if it was herself or what but Shard eventually lead her away and was sad when Xev and Uyi followed. Tried to keep her spirits up though, especially when meeting Rota's sister Mika.

Was invited to sit with Alice and her children, but kept herself a few feet away as they weren't her siblings, and Alice wasn't her mother. But was soon joined by Viktor and Lilu. Smooshed herself between them and her dream came true; became a hotdog.

And other things Soli can't remember. Except having a spell fight with Circe, watching Kato beat up another stag, and meeting Zafeiri and Devasha. And then being babysat by Zaf before bed.

Where is my brain gaiz rly.

Sept 10th, 2014

Soli needs to learn how to update srs.

-Hi Family
-HI STRIA AMG WHERE U BEEN
-Jyoti and Tickles Indigo talking about somethin. Left them be.
-Suddenly Moro, lots of shrinking
-Stubborn Mama
-Angry Moro
-Run or else Moro owies
-Circe somewhere in here AHH
-Mama Kio on the offensive
-Retreat please!
-/repeated call
-BUT MAMA I JUST WANTED TO GET MAMA KIO I SWARE
-Jyoti and Indigo talking more
-Mama Kio really hurt
-Grooming everyone especially Mama Kio
-Sitting with Family in the pond.

thensolibed

Sept 9th, 2014

Woke up to see Kettu lying besides the den. Gave the vixen snuggles before going off to get a drink at the idol. With a belly full of cold water, decided to go find Jyoti because his scent was coming from the same direction as Tickles.

(Then afk because doorbell + noms + doggy. AAAAND BACK)

But it seems there was just alot of quiet sitting. So cue the staring at Tickles pretty feathers because pretty feathers.

Given a wooden butterfly carving by Indi.

It was only a few minutes after Jyoti presented her with the gift Iggy/Tickles had made for her. She suddenly forgot the events that happened the day before. Sonali had found herself shocked, if not a little embarrassed that she had nothing to give back to him. It was something she learned that if you were given something, you should return the favor. Thinking on it, she thought she did not have anything, except perhaps her mouse skeleton but that was a bit meaningful to her still. However, there was something after all.
With the intent on preserving her new, beautiful gift, she ran all the way back to the den and stored the treasure among the few others she had obtained in the nook she herself had added to her little home. And from there, she retrieved something she would give back. It wasn't much, in fact she thought it was hardly anything; but it was quite literally a part of her. She did not have the means to make something creative out of wood like the phoenix, but she did in fact make this herself.
"Tickles?" The golden child strode closer, her voice somewhat muffled as she held something small in her lips. She lowered her head, her ears flicking back somewhat sheepishly as she bowed to him. "Thank you for the butterfly. It's beautiful." Lowering herself directly in front of him, she released the small item onto the earth. Upon closer inspection, it would be found out that the item was a small milk tooth, one of Sonali's that had fallen out when her adult teeth started growing in. "This is my tooth. Want you to have it."

Then settled next to Jyoti and cuddles.

Sept 8th, 2014

Woke up and immediately noticed Kettu there. Inched closer to give the kitsune some baby love and appreciation because she totally deserves it. Then decided she was hungry and thought this was a good time to practice hunting. Managed to catch a few mice and brought them to Mama and Jyoti, the former passing them all to Jyoti. Ate her own mouse then sat for a long time, relaxing.

Hi Circe, bye Circe.

Later on joined her siblings in peacocking mom. Succeeded

Sat with Mama and Mama Kio and Jyoti, Circe having gone again.

Late later on, there was some commotion nearby. Got up with Mama to investigate and saw Ramsus chasing Tickles. At first was very confused as to why Ram was chasing Tickles, but after watching the latter go after what looked like a fawn huddled in a tree, could only assume that this fawn belonged to Ram, and that Tickles was being naughty. Huffed at the birdboy and while Mama tried to break up the fight, went to see if the fawn was ok. Tried her hardest to be a big girl and show the youth that she wouldn't hurt her. Stood there as a sort of shield in case Tickles decided to do more teasing or whatever he was doing; would tell him right off that NO LEAVE BABIES ALONE TICKLES. Also hoped that Rams did not turn Tickles into a feather pancake...that would not be good. The suddenly Isi woke up. Kinda freaked out a bit and bowed and shrank and was all sort of "I'm sorry for intruding - cute baby - I'm a good girl really - really happy to see you again Ma'am." Then took her leave back to Mama. Passed Rams and Tickles in a massive stare off. Nope, not touching that. Did try to flash Rams a weak smile on the way by. Went back to Jyoti and Mama Kio and sat next to the former with Mama standing watch.

Sept 7th, 2014

Basically this happened.

"Ohai Tickles. Ignore me while I stare at you and try to figure out how to get feathers like you.

Kettutututututututu you're so sweet, I appreciate you.

HI WISTERIA- BYE TICKLES! ...Bye Wisteria!

MAMA I DON'T KNOW WHATS GOING ON DON'T FLOG ME OKAY? AND SISSY, SIT. SITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSITSIT!!!! WILL YOU SIT- THANK YOU." /sits

Most of the day was literally spent sitting with Mama and Circe. Didn't mind it. Wasn't too much in a mood to run around anyway. But later that night, after Jyoti showed up, got up to play with Circe and a Ronra! Had a bit of a spell fight and discovered how much she liked the Forest Spirit Mask and the sound it made.
The helped Mama, Circe and Ronra peacock Kio. And TEF is stupid so Sonali's spells killed the peacock feathers twice even after redeeming herself in between Was glad Mama Kio was a good sport and continued to play around with them. Really did fancy her with those feathers though...

And cute screenshots!







After everyone went to sleep, moved off to the den to curl up there.

Sept 6th, 2014

Still just in resting mode. (AKA Soli being kidnapped by her hubby to play more Zelda day.)

Knowing that Kettu and Uncle Ben were there, and very glad that they were. Feeling pretty safe, but definitely can't wait for her mothers to wake up.

(Then Soli was afk for hours because MORE TWILIGHT PRINCESS WITH THE HUBBY!)

Slept forever, but got up having noticed Jyoti shuffling off. Saw Mama and Circe in the distance, the former teacher the latter the ways of drag. Yep.

[8:50:11 PM] Emseh: No, it's just Sha doing what she loves. Being in drag
[8:50:20 PM] Brit N: and circe learning her ways

/ded

Tried to help Jyoti move, feeling utterly guilty for his predicament. Kept her tail tucked between her legs as Mama came and hoisted him off to the idol. Circe went to sit by the den (player had to afk). After a good soaking, he was then brought to a sunspot to dry off and have medicine applied. Said nothing and followed obediently. Sat besides Jyoti and groomed him while Mama fixed up the medicine.

Sept 5th, 2014

Woke up feeling incredibly sore. Every muscle screamed at her to cease any movement. Huddled up by her minuscule stash she dug out in the den, surveying the damage. Noted her back was hardly touched, her long fur on her spine doing well to keep the heat from her skin. Her upper forelegs and especially her nose however, were not so lucky. Nose is very raw and tender as if sunburnt. Upper legs fair a little better due to her fur.

Briefly glanced over to Jyoti and noted he was quite beat up. This was her fault... Regardless of Circe egging her on, she chose to fight back. And it seems Jyoti paid the price. Swallowed some bitter tears and moved to curl up next to him. Unable to actually apologize as the words just clung to her throat. Instead ignored her complaining body and offered him some loving, apologetic licks.

Spent most of the day sleeping but did move closer to her family when she shifted a bit. Very glad her mother and Kio were there, as well as a deer she might as well start referring to as Uncle Ben!

Edit: Not sure when, but Lilu AND Wisteria were there after the fight. Probably Sept 4th but idk ;; Appreciate you both for being there though <3

Sept 4th, 2014

Woke up and immediately went to seek out Mama. Disturbed to smell what smelt like blood in the den, and Circe having left. Decided, for her mental stability, that it was simply something her sister had eaten. While looking for Mama, tried to keep track on Circe's scent trail but failed, the stench of something delicious filling her nostrils.

Plopped down next to Mama who was going to town on a guar leg. Pretty much drooled as lady-like as possible. Settled to ask Mama for a nibble when she was done, totally not going to be rude and interrupt mama noms.

Extremely pleased and utterly thankful when Mama moved the leg and let her have some. Really had little idea what to expect, thinking all meat tasted like mouse; but she was wrong. Quite literally chowed down, not realizing how hungry she had been when she first awakened. Decided that whatever she was eating tasted WAY BETTER than a measly mouse. Wondered if she would ever be as good as hunter as mama to take down something this big. No, probably not. She'd have to go for something smaller for sure, she was hardly growing as it is.

Ate to her hearts content until she looked up and saw Mama gone. Proceeded to bring the bone back to Mama's stash and then ran after her mother. Before meeting with her mother and Kio playing nearby, washed up at the idol before moving to join the play. Was spelled numerous times and was unable to spell either of them. Noted the red pelts. HMMMMM.

Followed after them and bounced and played as she did, really happy to be playing instead of sitting around. met a few deer (didn't catch their names). From there followed after Mama to Lesbian hill:

[4:17:50 PM] Emseh: this is lesbian hill, Sonali, say it with me "LES-B-IAN"

Took note of a sleeping body nearby but otherwise was distracted by Tickles in a tree. Decided to prove to herself and maybe him that she can get into the tree too. Did so.



Then jumped down and joined her mother, only to find the sleeper was awake (Zev). Went to greet him. Quickly tried to usher the other fawn into play but he didn't seem to catch on that fast. But soon enough he was running around too. Really happy about this. Bounced and bounced and --

CIRCE?

Noticed her Sister being a super stalker and went to greet her while also motioning for Zev to follow. Rubbed all over her sister and all the love. ALL OF IT. Prompted her to join the play with Zev. And suddenly Halla. Greeted politely and noted the interaction with Halla; related maybe? Didn't see much of a similarity between the two but realized they smelt similar. Nodded approval.

More play, but soon after Zev went to sit by his mother, and then joined Circe under a tree for some sissy cuddles.

Then Circe moved off so followed her.

The stuff happened I can't remember because I had to leave in a hurry to go food shopping...

Then woke up and found Mama and Circe and VIctor and Jocelyn, YAY! Greeted everyone then chilled out (Because Soli hungry.)

Mama kinda disappeared, but found her beating up rocks. Concerned for her and Circe, something seemed weird between them. Climbed up the rocks to join Mama with Viktor and Joce. The dozed off, only to come to find out Mama was gone again. So was Circe. Said a quick goodbye to Viktor and Joce before bolting to find her family.

Found them, however it was...a strange sight. Kyr, the deer who had attacked them a while ago, was standing over what looked like a fallen corpse. Mama looked really angry, and in turn got angry as well. Helped Circe try to spell the flaming creature but it had little effect on him. Then remembered how her own magic effected Shard and Nik. Maybe...maybe it works the same way with this creature? Deep down, it felt really wrong to use such pure magic this way, but if that creature did kill a poor soul, then it was balanced...right?

Completely lost herself to a fighting instinct, bolting in and around the creature and using the white gods magic on him. Unsure if it harmed him, but noticed it did take his attention away from the victim. Fur was singed, but managed to get out of it pretty unscathed, her smallness and agility along with the help of many others distracting the creature allowing her to get away pretty easily. Laughed at the creatures misfortune. Taunted it. Mocked it. Reveled in the fact so many were after it now. Was told to follow Shard by him and while she did, still ran back to collect her sister, not wanting to leave Circe near the creature.

Adrenaline still pumped even after the creature left. Was sternly scolded by Mama, and then Kio. Shrank under their disciplinary words and apologized profusely. Still felt it was the right thing to do, but kept note that MAYBE SHE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THAT AT HER AGE! Leh sigh. gdi Sonali...

Followed her mother to the pond, but stopped by the burned body to try to see if they were ok. Was told no by Kio, and didn't press the issue. All of the familial grooming. Adrenalin quickly dying off, feeling a sense of dread that rocked her inner peace.

What did she just do?

Was then promptly attacked at the pond by Kyr a little later. Managed to squirm her way out while spitting at the flaming horse with only some singed fur. More running around, taunting, spelling, apologizing, chasing, etc etc. Irritated at this creature more than anything. Definitely noted him on her hitlist for when she grows up. If she makes it at this rate LOL

All the fawns got targeted, fleeing when he came near yet again after having settled with her family. Moved off with said family and everything seemed to die down. Was lead to Honeyfur and thanked her for her help before moving off to the idol to clean up.

And attacked again. Fled and managed to use forest magic to "fly" her way on top of a tree. Stayed there until she realized she was alone. Jumped off to find her siblings. Chased after them but was promptly chased by someone else (Guibour?). Tried to fly but failed (damn mouse). Ran all the way to the den where they tried to get in. Called out for help, being trapped in the den made her curl up by her belongings. Somehow kept herself calm enough not to cry. Maybe this was a really bad idea.

THIS WAS A REALLY BAD IDEA SONALI.

Flopped on the grass, sides heaving. Burnt fur, some flesh wounds but she'd live. So exhausted. Didn't even have the energy to greet Ross when he stopped by. Did however try to give him a thankful glance when he left and came back with poppies. Did not hesitate to stretch her neck and grab some to chew on. Being in pain was no fun, but she desperately needed to relax. However on high alert, in case they come back yet again..

Sept 3rd, 2014

What are updates?

The past few days there had been little to no goings on. Hardly much to report other than

But today...

Although most of her waking hours was spent cuddling beside her clingy mother (and did not mind this fact in the least), did feel incredibly lazy (most due to Soli being fekkin tired out from werk).

Whist that sitting however, did some to some very enlightening conclusions. Circe hasn't been around in a while, at least awake anyway, had noted her sister sleeping heavily in the den and had no heart to try to awaken her. And Jyoti has been fleeting. Felt a sort of sense of dread though regardless. Missed the familiar interaction with her siblings, and further missed the fact she hardly ever saw Tsa and Kitai. Tsa was such a free spirit, she had hardly been around at all. Kitai was so lazy he was probably sleeping soundly on a tree branch somewhere, safe and sound. She didn't concern herself with her youngest siblings, Tsa hopped here and there and seemed sly enough to keep herself from getting really hurt and after seeing her grandmother, was very certain Kitai was going to be a giant and no one could take him down.

But that left Circe and Jyoti and of course her mother. During this time, Kalidas had come around and only managed a weak smile in his direction. Felt extremely guilty about not getting up to properly greet him and invite him closer, but she had too much on her mind. She only hoped the pale faced buck would forgive her if and when she sought him out in the future. Still deep in thought, she thought about the three who had been the most present in her life. Circe's sleeping had taken it's toll on the childs mind, but luckily it was just that; sleeping. The other siblings did that for a long time, so it wasn't SO bad. Still, it made the golden fawn uneasy. Jyoti, who always seem to cling to her had been more absent, but she busied herself with think that he was becoming a hunter like Mama. There was nothing wrong with those two being a little more distant. They were all growing up.

Growing...up.

Much later, when it was just she and her mother and she was able to swallow her fears, Mama got up and lead her to where she kept her stash; swallowed and hoped she wasn't about to get scolded for trying to steal a meal a while ago. No such scolding came. Instead was showed a strange animal (guar) carcass in a tree but before she was able to ask how it got up there, a stranger came and POOF MAMA BUNNY. Gave chase after her mother who nibbled her legs and was very careful not to step on the bunnydoe.

Had numerous spells thrown at her and found out that the rabbit spell was particularly powerful for it did not allow her to spell her mother. Kept note of this. Laughed and had fun and forgot about her earlier fears, continuing to chase after her mother until they both climbed onto a log and started dancing. The night ended with a bunnyshabracuddletimewhat.

August 31st, 2014

Got up and immediately went to the pond for a much needed drink. Itching to hunt like she did the other day. Got a drink and a slight bath in, and on her way out of the pond was stopped by a fawn. Had no idea what it wanted but decided to humor them and dance with them. Was joined by another a few minutes later. More confusion. More dancing. Ah yes nuzzles, here have some too. Friendly Sonali is friendly.

Wandered off when one of the fawns left and the other was distracted by another fawn. Decided to hunt in a little bit, but wanted to roam for a bit and explore. Was sure there was plenty of the forest left to discover, even though her mother had brought them on numerous excursions.

Discovered the Blue Bowl. Although it was a place she had been to before, never actually got to explore it thoroughly. After wandering around and through it, found an area she liked best. Decided that maybe when she got older and could no longer fit in the den, she would make this spot her special place to put her belongings.

Much more wandering and found herself overlooking the pond. Noticed Rin. Kept a close eye on her and had every intention to flee should the doe come close. Luckily the wounded Yokai left. Felt relieved.

Wandered some more. Tried to figure out why a fawn was crying but it ran away from her. Ok then.

Settled down under a willow to rest and build energy to try and hunt later.

Towards the end of August

Because I lost my post and ugh I was away from the house for like 3 days ;;
_{The following are MY POSTS from an rp with a little bit edited here and there.}

It all started as a simple walk, at least, that was what the golden fawn thought it was. She was used to their mother up and leading them elsewhere, be it the pond or some other location. This was no different, not at first anyway. But instead of going to the pond or out of the tall grasses of the birch, they went in deeper. The child hopped through the grasses, even though she was older, she was still barely able to see clearly over the fluffy tufts. A smile graced her muzzle, but as Shahla slowed down and seemed to shrink herself in the very grasses Sonali was leaping from, the child followed suit. The posture her mother took on was bizarre, it appeared almost submissive but at the same time...it felt hardly so. Creeping forward, she had to keep close to her mothers hind legs to ensure she would not lose the tigree through the grasses.

Shahla stopped, and so did Sonali. Perking her overly large ears, the child looked up as her eyes met the golden ones of her mother. Catching each word, lips parted, then pursed. /Who?/ Swallowing, she did not dare ask. Something odd was happening, something that felt...natural, but unnatural all at the same time. Flaring her nostrils, she took a soft breath. Quiet, after all. At the mention of mice, the child squinted. She knew what a mouse was...but catching them? For what purpose?

A flash in her mind and she seemed to understand. The day she tried to sneak some of Shahla’s meal. The day she lost her tooth. The day she tasted blood for the first time. That was what was natural. A look of knowing and wild instinct crossed the childs face. A slightly lidded look that was terrified and prepared all at once.

Sonali was far more unsteady on her hooves in this sort of crouching position, finding herself digging them into the soft earth below her more than she normally would. Even though she did so, she still managed to stay relatively quiet. Her ears were completely perked forward, listening to her mothers breathing and trying desperately to copy. Through her mother's legs and further through the grass, Sonali could see the large tree. Peering up, she took note of it, and the scents around it. Mice. She could smell them. Were they inside? How would they get them. Swallowing, her focused on her mother as she spoke, and nodded. She couldn’t help give Jyoti a confident grin though.

During any normal day, seeing rabbits, squirrels, and even birds flit around the forest...she had no desire to chase them. She had seen her friends and yes even her mother turned into another animal by forest magic, and even then, she had no inclination to give chase. That idea just simply did not cross the fawns mind.

But here, it was as if a key had been struck within her mind and reset her instincts. Hearing and seeing her mothers hooves dig at the earth ferociously provided a much needed tempo that matched her heartbeat, setting the mood. If she knew how to countdown, she likely would have. The very instant the squirming bodies fled from their holes, the golden fawn pounced. Unfortunately, she missed, her jaws snapping thin air. But she did not stop, twisting her body to give chase through the tall grass. Her goal was to catch these mice no matter what. That was what Mama wanted. That was what Mama will get, no matter what.

She crashed through the grass, squinting as she could barely see through the stalks. But her large ears picked up their scurrying. Snap, Snap, SNAP! Her jaws missed, missed, and missed again. A growl could be heard as she spun around to find another target. She barely noticed another mouse scurrying behind her. Whipping around, legs nearly flailing in the air and her magic billowing from her shoulders, a resounding crunch could be heard.

The grass swayed as Sonali drew back towards her mother. As she passed through the grass towards the little clearing near the tree, a very triumphant child could be seen with a mouse in her jaws, blood dribbling down her perfectly white muzzle. So it wasn’t the cleanest victory, but she considered it a victory.

Sonali waved her tail like a white and gold flag of triumph. There was no surrendering here. She caught sight of Jyoti with a squirming mouse in his jaws, but she thought nothing of it other than being extremely pleased that the two of them had been successful on their first hunt! It was incredibly hard for her to keep herself still, she simply wanted to jump for joy and celebrate their achievement! But she managed to contain herself, glancing over to her mother and brother as the tigress spoke to him. The question she gave him made Sonali think about her own mouse. It was not squirming. Was this wrong?

With a feeling of unease, she looked at her mother as she came to her. But instead, she was asked a different question. Relaxing, she thought about it. /Eat it?/ Wait...she remembered again, that day where she had tasted this warm, red liquid. It tasted good. It /still/ tastes good. Flaring her nostrils and widening her eyes, she nodded her head. Glancing to Jyoti, she wondered if this was the first time for him too. He seemed so natural!

Nodding to her mother, the child let the mouse down. It’s bloody corpse laid their unmoving, and she stared at it, licking her jaws. She looked up in time to see Jyoti seemingly, and very expertly deliver the killing blow. She was certain she did it wrong, but she still caught her first prey. Looking to her mother again, she nodded again.

Sonali had stepped back to allow her mother to move forward to demonstrate what do do. Wide eyes watched curiously, and ears forever seemed perked to listen to the instructions. With both the verbal and visual guides, Sonali moved close as her mother backed away. Placing her hoof gently on the mouse, she stared at it. It seemed so surreal. She had done this. Part of her felt sad, yes. But that was only part of her. She was also part tiger too. “I understand.” The child said, still looking down at her meal. This mouse would provide her her first non-milk meal. A meal she had caught herself, well mostly herself. Lowering her head down, she sniffed the body. It was mouse of course, but it smelled almost similar to the leg she had tried a little while ago. Swallowing, she bared her tiny, sharp teeth and sank them into the flesh. This was exactly what she had done with the leg. But by some miracle, there was no pop, no indication any more teeth were going to fall out. She let go and looked down, just to make sure however.

Eyes glanced to Jyoti, and she was astounded at how easily he chewed up the mouse. So she of course, wouldn’t be left behind. It was hard at first, sinking her teeth, tearing the flesh. The fur tickled her nose. But she managed. Tear and chew, tear and chew. The warm, moist flesh was satisfying, even more satisfying, was knowing she did the work.

Sonali found herself ravenous, picking the mouse so clean that there was barely anything left on the small skeleton. Once she was done she licked her muzzle repeatedly, drying blood uncomfortable and she certainly wouldn’t dream of dirty appearances. She had listened intently to her mothers words, and at first it seemed they were just that, words. But the child knew that she was growing up, just like the rest of her siblings. They’d get bigger, and while the mouse was a very tasty treat, she realized that it simply wasn’t /enough/. Even in this short hunting session, she had learned so much, about the world, and herself. Glowing eyes fixated on the tigress as she moved closer to the den, hearing about the stock and bigger prey, and their grandmothers world. There was another world that wasn’t this forest or White Mother’s world? Standing up straight suddenly, Sonali was interested. Adventure.

“We’ll be good Mama!” Sonali chimes in agreement with her brother. She leaned down and grabbed the skeletal remains of her mouse, intent to keep it as a memento of her first achievement. Striding over with her head held high, she looked up to her mother and nodded. She would do whatever their tiger pelted mother said no matter what. This was the chance of a lifetime, she was sure!

Sonali had indeed followed her mother back to the den, and had stashed her mouse skeleton with her fallen teeth. Once that was done, she did not hesitate to snuggle up to the tigresses left side, stretching out and yawning. Although she was hardly dirty anymore, the fawn took a few moments to lick herself over. Once that was done, she turned to look back up at Shahla.

“Thank you mama.” The child smiled, and lowered her head to give the tigress a loving headbutt and lick to her shoulder.

Sonali closed her eyes as she snuggled against her mother. She imagined the world her mother painted with her words. Like the forest...but...more trees. The grass was tall, green, not gold like the grass here, not gold like her. She twitched her ears. Other animals. Like the mice. But not mice. For them to eat as food. “Hmm…”

The golden childs eyes opened at Shahla’s last statement. Other deer...but they aren’t able to be friends with them. She pursed her lips in thought. It was another world after all...so...they might be similar, but they were different. Still, it didn’t stop the uneasy feeling forming within the little girl. “We...We’re not gonna eat /them/ are we mama?”” Now it was her turn to question.

Sonali was quick to ease up when her mother seemingly confirmed that they were not going to eat the other deer. it didn’t seem right to the child, at least now anyway. Perhaps when she would age some, she might truly see the differences between this forest, and the jungle they would soon enter. The child barely remembered the striped tiger that was their grandmother. But hearing Jyoti and her mother converse, it only confirmed what she had suspected long ago; the tigress was indeed a part of the family.

At the inclination that they would be going, Sonali was on her hooves, her chest heaving as she had quite literally sprang into the air. “YES!” Her tail flicked behind her eagerly, Jyoti’s closeness doing just as he had desired. Adventure! Her eyes were wide and bright like stars. “Gonna see Mama and Gramma,” yes, she stole the name from her brother, “get big mice!” She blurted out. Of course she didn’t actually mean it literally, but it made sense to her at least.

The winged child was quick to trot after her mother, all senses tuned on focusing on the tigress. Once they stopped at the rock, Sonali was already looking around inquisitively. But soon everything was clarified, and Sonali nodded. She remembered her White Mothers Portals. It was scary, back then anyway. She didn’t feel so scared now. Her hooves kneaded the earth beneath her as she anticipated her time to go through. She nodded. “Yes mama.” She didn’t want her mother to worry, and she certainly didn’t want to appear nervous in front of her brother. She turned to look at her brother as he spoke to her, and she gave him a firm nod. Letting him go first, she prepared herself. When he was gone, she took a breath and stepped through with her head held high.

And what she saw...was breathtaking. It was not like the forest, well, a little. But it certainly was not like their White Mothers world. Everything was green and lush. It was beautiful, and she could only stand there in awe with wide eyes.

Sonali lowered her head towards her mother when the doe spoke, listening to the instructions that soon followed. She was luminescent as ever. At her mothers sudden calling for her own mother, she suddenly had a hard time keeping herself quiet. She wanted to call out too! But she knew to be good and be quiet and listen of course. Once the call was complete, she mimicked Shahla’s posture and swiveled her ears for a reply. Low and behold, it came. It was far different than Sonali was used to, but seeing as the tigress whispered for them to follow, the golden child was quick to do so. She kicked up her heels and quickly followed suit, making her way onto the natural path.

“Don’t be scared Jyoti, I’ll protect you!” She looked back and grinned at him as he was uneasy. Of course she was teasing, but perhaps it was a sad attempt to cheer him up.

Sonali smiled happily as she followed her mother, happier still when she received the nose bump to her head. She couldn’t help but chuckle at Jyoti’s retort. Although the world was far different than she was used to and filled with sights and sounds not found in her home of the forest, she felt comfortable simply because her mother and brother were there with her. The girl matched her pace with the tigress as best she could, even while her mother slowed down to allow them to go slower. The pace was slow enough to allow the child a glance about here and there to see what there was to be seen, but also quick enough to keep Sonali from being too distracted.

Soon they diverted from the path back into the thick foliage, and the child got papped in the face a few times by giant leaves that seemed almost as big as she was. Ears perk forward as Shahla calls once more, and she focuses her attention on the far off chuffs. Soon enough, a familiar figure emerges from the greeness and the tigress leapt forward. The scene before her reminded Sonali of how she felt with Shahla, and that could only mean this was indeed their Gramma.

“Mousebrain, that’s Gramma.” Sonali giggled. “Gramma!” The golden fawn leapt forward, beaming as bright as her magical aura. There was nothing to fear, the tigress looked so much like Kitai! Folding her ears back as she neared, she tried to take in the large form that was Savera. The tiger radiated power, and Sonali found herself very humbled. As was tradition, the fawn curtseyed.

Long white and gold tail wiggled gleefully as she quite literally smooshed her face against her grandmothers. She was happy that the tigress remembered her name. She didn’t know Savera’s name, but Gramma seemed to work just fine. Beaming greater than her wings glowed, the little gold fawn swelled. So much for being humble. She was pretty and she knew it, Gramma only made that fact more apparent. A purr rising to her throat, she bumped her grandmother in return before stepping back to allow the tigress passage to her timid brother. She didn’t really blame him, Savera was huge. In fact, if Sonali hadn’t remembered the orange and black striped form from her birth, she likely would feel just as timid as he.

“Is okay, Jyoti! She like Kitai! And Tsa.” She decided to leave out the ‘fluffy smooshface part’.

The child watched Jyoti and proceeded to giggle. He wasn’t exactly wrong, she DID look weird. But she looked like them all. She was family alright. The golden child moved a bit closer, but gave them enough room to smoosh faces like she and Gramma had before.

At mama’s voice, immediately sat down and folded her ears back. Sure the stern tone wasn’t directed at her, but she was still thinking along the same lines. Swallowing, she looked to Jyoti. A twitch of her ears and a few awkward moments later, Sonali glances between the two adults curiously. With Savera back on her rock quickly, and Shahla soon to follow, Sonali hurries to follow suit as well. She has a bit of trouble getting on the rock, as there is no magical flying in this world.

A few moments later and she finally managed to scramble her way up. After observing the two, she mimicks Savera and flops on her side, simply turning into a puddle of cream white and gold fur that glimmered in the sun. She had a happy smile plastered on her face, nothing could go wrong. Except Jyoti’s pouting. Well that would need to be remedied. As soon as she was down she was back up. She crouched down and growled at him playfully.

But soon play was turned into getting ready to watch the adults hunt. Unfortunately, the hunt was unsuccessful, but the children did get to see the power their grandmother possessed as she stalked about in search for decent prey. It was then Sonali realized she would never be as strong as her Grandmother or Mother, and although it was a harsh blow of reality on her confidence, she knew that she had power elsewhere.

August 26th, 2014

Woke up where she had fallen asleep the night before. Decided to wait for her family to wake/arrive bu climbing onto a stump and watching those coming and going from the pond. Decided that today she would be observant.

But that got BORING.

Wandered off when scenting Mama Smell, now seemingly able to notice the difference. Got some Mama Smell lovings in, then a naked showed up. Lots of head tilting and even some dancing at some point. Then naked left. Was invited to play by the feathered doe and definitely took her up on the offer. Bounced around, ran around, the works. Stopped when Lilu turned away, and noticed a figure in the distance. Followed Lilu when the purple doe went closer, but recognized the darker doe and halted. Remembered everyone chasing this doe, so a bunch of red flags went up and didn't get any closer, staying behind a tree to watch.

And suddenly Mama. Got scolded and shrank back to apologize, as the dark does approach was sudden and unexpected. Placed herself under Mama obediently with her tail between her legs. Angry Mama is a nope.

Jyoti showed up a short time later. Gave him nuzzles then sat down under Mama.

August 25th, 2014

Wandering upon waking. Tried eating some grass. Boring stuff. Wants to try more of that yummy bloody stuff. Lost some more teeth, stashed them in the den. Chewed on some more poppies. Slept in a sunspot for a while. More wandering. Settled by a small tree by the Twins. Joined by Kio. Lots of kio nuzzles. Then sitting with Kio.

Mostly just sat there most of the day, until joined by Mama and Jyoti, later on Viktor and Joce, and even later a skittish Soet. Stared at Soet for a long time, giving him the most pouty of faces she could muster while he sat with Viktor and Joce. SHE WILL BEFRIEND HIM SOMEDAY. /ded

Stria joined much later, and got up to bound around with the fawn, truly happy to see her sister-not-sister. After much running around, learned a new flying technique from the sunspot fawn and managed to awkwardly get on Mama's back with her. The Mama ran around with Stria and joined in of course! A little bit later jumped up onto Mama's back and used Stria's head as a seat.

But then everyone settled down and had a cuddlepile with the red fawn and her brother Jyoti, feeling content. Fell asleep there.

Recently

Because Soli is an utter fail at updating ._.
--Joce Gets Hurt--
• Lots of fighting
• Jocelyn got hurt by a black doe (Pandora)
• Got really angry for the first time
• Gave poppies to Jocelyn when she was passed out against a tree
• Fay is so cool!
• Tickles, are you bad?
• Morioch is scurry and mean
• Pandora is mean
• Fletcher is big and did I mention BIG
• Kio get in trouble
• Along with Cassie?
• ANGRY SONALI IS ANGRY

--Kyrian is a Meanie--
• Saw Mama get hurt from a fight with Kyrian who was after her (Sonali) and Circe
• Flaming horse is bad
• The other thing (Kyrians Demon?) ALSO BAD
• Running away = Halla follows
• Hi Halla thanks!
• omgmamastopfightingplz
• Circeyouok?

--Halla Dies--
• Rin kills Halla, but doesn't know this ICly (just stating for the readers)
• Shit hits the fan
• WORLD OF WARCRAFT War
• Huge forest chase
• Mama and a ton of people chase Rin

--Rin Dies--
• Rin is back
• WARRRRRR
• Bye mama
• MAMA LET ME COME
• WAIT PLZ
• ohai Roanen
• Roanen don't hurt me plz
• OKITRUSTYOUROANEN
• Hey Isa!
• I think Rin was slaughtered
• I think Isela turned into a dragon
• holyballsthatsalotofstuffthatiforgottoupdate

• i probably forgot some stuff

August 19th, 2014

Awoke to a very strange phenomena in the forest; fog. Made the connection, or rather the observation that it reminded her of clouds...that had fallen from the sky. Discovered that the sun was hard to see today too. Not very unnerved by the peculiar weather, and decided to explore it a bit. Maybe she could find the sun after all.

Journey ended short, as she discovered Kio. Feeling rather lonely, moved to sit next to the doe despite the stranger sleeping besides her. She hoped the green doe wouldn't mind.

August 18th, 2014

Got up and was feeling rather hungry. Tried to sniff out Mama and ended up at her birthsite. Was pleased to find that her mother had been here recently. Turned to go look for her, but something caught her attention. Bits of fur and blood was scattered around the opening of a small den, and the child could just barely make out what looked to be a leg of some sort. Had been initially worried it was her mothers, but the scent was not hers save for where she apparently had the leg in her muzzle.

Stuck her snout in and managed to pull the leg out a bit, finding the blood to be rather satisfying, which was odd because nothing really tickled her fancy other than milk before. Felt a little brave, and sunk her teeth into the flesh. She pulled, but instead of meat in her jaws she felt a little pop and pulled away. Embedded in the flesh was a single baby tooth.

Completely freaked out for a few minutes, hyperventilating that something was wrong with her. Could feel where the gap was located in her mouth with her tongue, but completely missed the point of another tooth growing in.

Decided that meat was a bad idea. Managed to grab her tooth from the leg, shove the object back in it's place, and ran off to the den. Hid her face against the inside of the den, having dug out a small niche where she could save the tooth. Started crying because she thinkst she broke her mouth.

Sulked for hours in the den, keeping her back to her tooth as if not looking at it will deny the fact it fell out to begin with; didn't really work, as she pushing her tongue over the space. Moved only when Kio showed up, giving the green doe as much a smile as she could muster, refusing to open her mouth. But it seemed that Kio noticed something was up. Was given poppies to chew on to ease the little throb in her jaw. Thankful for such and did so. Moved herself out of the Den so that she could rest her head on Kio's back.

Dozed most of the day, the poppies working their magic. (AKA Soli with hubby playing TLZ:TP!) Later on, she came to only to find she was alone. Crawled out of the den and decided to head to the pond. Maybe she could see which tooth fell out. Slowly made her way to the body of water, bringing herself closer to the deep end now that she grew some. Dunked her head in to wake up, but then looked at her reflection. Growled at it, bearing her teeth. She could just make out the space. Stomach icing over in dread, the child wandered out of the water with hopes of finding something to help her forget her plight.

Wandered off towards where Halla and her kin were, mostly because Victor was there. Did not have the guts to go closer though, as her powers effect them negatively. Sorta sulked away and stood under a weeping willow. Sighed to herself, but was approached bu another deer (spottyfawn). Given the idol pelt. Felt invigorated for a time, but as soon as it faded, her wings went back to normal. Moved off to find her family or friends.

Wandered into the Ruins, and fancied herself watching an interaction between two deer (Malikorin? and Miriam). But their interaction seemed limited to just staring, until the female ran towards the male. Really confused if they are fighting or playing. Too hard to see really. Was startled when Fay showed up. But seemed to have been ignored as the woofie sat down to watch. Kept watching the two, but soon they parted ways and left herself.

Wandered through the birch, passing some deer she recognized (Maica, Sloane and Indigo), as well as one stag she did not (Morioch). Decided they were busy and pressed on.

Climbed everything.

Then retreated back to the den for some sleep.

August 17th, 2014

Found Mama with alot of others: Circe, Nik, Shard, Roa, Isela, (Xemi's baby!), and soon Halla and Isa came.

Some brat of a fawn devouted everyone, and Halla and Shard moved off away looking disoriented? Shard looked like he was in pain?

Mama went closer, followed but was told to move back. Did so, considerably. But started pacing anxiously. Couldn't go sit with Circe as was planned; she was too close Roa. Didn't hate Roa. Knew that she should probably be resentful for what he did to her, but she remembered how scared he looked too. Can't hate him for it, but scared of it.

Mama came back over after a bit and provided much needed comfort. Stood under her for some time, watching Nikhil and Isabeau who had come closer to inspect Shard from a distance. Then Nik and Shard ran off.

Watched Isa for a while and finally got the chance to greet and sniff. She didn't seem the playful type, at least with bouncing and running. Spar? Did try but couldn't help but fall over laughing.

Went to go stand over Mama after a bit, which didn't seem to be much of an effort anymore.

Stayed like that for a while, but then noticed Mama somehow crawled out from under her and was gone. Panicked, but then noticed Mama not far off. Bounded over to her, relieved. Was lead towards Victor, Maica and someone new (Zorn). But moved off to go check up on Soet who was asleep nearby. Smug that she got to sniff him without his knowledge. Lead back to Victor and got fluffy red woofie nuzzles and invited to sit. Sat with Mama next to the others.

August 14th, 2014

Woke up. Feeling adventurous. Noticed A CRAP TON OF PEOPLE near by. Bounced over to go say to Lilu first but was shoved into a den by Mr Blake. Probably would have screamed if Lilu wasn't there but found Rue and Sam inside. Cuddled up with them, but unsure what the heck is going on. Only notices Halla and big long neck (Cad) near by and the purple doe (Rin) she briefly saw the other day. Bonesis, June and I THINK Ross are nearby too. And I forgot Solene.

Lots of tension, then Halla and her mate left, as well as Rin and Bonesis. June and Solene left soon after. Crawled out of the den and looked around confused. Mama came over a little while later. Rin and Bonesis came back at some point with a little doe (Mirai).

Tried to be sneaky with Sam at one point. Ended up romping a few yards from where everyone was resting. Nik came over. Greeted him from afar, unsure if she was allowed to approach, having learned long ago he nor Shard appreciates her getting too close. He left but got a nod and headtilt from him. Went back to bouncing then Lilu came over.

Followed Sam back to the group when Nikhil seemed to garner their mothers attention. Kept a decent distance, though watched the two until Sha invited her over. Slipped over and noted Nikhils backpedaling. Tried to stay at least a few feet away. Got some sniffs and greeting in until Nik left. Unsure why he does so. Is she scary to them? Thoguht about asking Mama but decided against it, instead turning to go back to Sam.

Sam went to Mama, but then decided to meet those with Lilu and Mr. Blake. Barely got a sniff in on Bonesis and Rin, when Mirai got up. Sniffed and greeted, then ROMP. Romp romp romp.

Was invited to sit next to the long haired doe, and did so happily.

Got up when Sam moved off. Went to follow him to Sha, where there was a fawn pressed into her side. SUDDENLY TSABHI. The Halla came out of NO WHERE. ??? Sam bolted. Was started behind Tsabhi. The Halla ran off. Tsa followed. Followed Tsa. Halla seemed agitated about something. Saw only a glimpse of a fawn before getting distracted by Tsa.

Tsa somehow disappeared (went to sit with Bonesis), and ended up meeting a small pale faced fawn (Nimh). Playtime, but then sit time.
(AKA: Sam you pimping )
Tsabhi joined them a little bit later.

ELABORATE LATER

Jocelyn showed up, so Victor got up. Danced with them for a while, laughing.

Stria showed up, followed by Rune. Then Maica showed up. SUDDENLY MINI"S ERRYWHERE.

Stria did not seem happy, so left her be but felt concerned for her regardless.

Met Batnass.

Liange came to get Maica and Jo, seemed scared of Mama

met her, she seemed nice.

Nik arrived and soon so did Tsa. Tsa seemed interested in Nik, and he in her. Watched them from a respectful distance, but envious that Tsa could interact with their older brother.

Mostly just sat down with Maica, Jocelyn and Victor, and Liange a while later.

Fell asleep there.

August 13th, 2014

ELABORATE SOLI.

Lots of nap. Sha baby bra.

Woke to Mama gone, but was with Kettu and Sam. Looked around curiously. Sniffed and approved of Kettu there of course. Saw Mama and Nik in the distance, but got onto the playground rocks with Jyoti and Viktor (whom she met briefly the night before but forgot uppppdaatteee). Didn't know what was going on with Nik and Mama, too far away to see what was actually going on. Uneasy, but comforted by Jyoti's presence as well as their new friend Victor with them.

Stayed on the rocks for a while. Can't remember what happened...

Was lead off by Mama, and met two cute fawns: Jocelyn and her brother Maica. Jocelyn seemed more outgoing than Maica, but certainly approved of the latters intriguing appearance. Sat for a while until lots of teasing and playing with Family. Circe showed up as well. Tried to peacock mom but nope. teased her.

Played with a very hyper Ronra and Mba when . Hati came along as well as Kitai. Jahi and North were nearby but soon came closer. Playing ensued but before long Jahi and gher cubs, as well as North, went back to their spot.

Victor came back over. La showed up at some point.

The whole family was together for once! Soooo happy to play with her siblings and making new friends.

And then Soet. Damn Soet. No matter how many times she inches closer and bowed and tried to be cheerful and friendly. NOEP. Poor Hati seemed to want the same thing but lucky for her, she was a wolf like Soet. Came to the conclusion that Soet is a meanie poo :< Pouty face at him all night.

Smooshed herself between Circe and Jyoti to feel better after the many rejections of Soet. Fell asleep like that.

August 11th, 2014

Woke up and scented Mama nearby. Happily made her way over to her mother.There were so many there, including a rather wounded doe (Rin). Avoided her, the scent of blood causing some anxiety from her own bloodloss she had to deal with herself. Mama Smell was a rabbit, Mr. Blake sat nearby, there was a scary looking red deer (Bonesis), but was too distracted by Mama and Sister-Not-Sister-Stria. Hopped around and headbutted her mother and enjoyed herself for a time before noticing another Mama Smell. A baby Mama Smell (Rue). Was super surprised and sniffed and invited the little Mama Smell to play.

Lots of play to be had, then Kio came over. Gave her lots of nuzzles when it was her turn after Mama. A bit more play, but then everyone relaxed and sat down. In the midst of the cuddle pile, Mama had to go (player had to leave), Stria left, Wisteria joined and left, another fawn joined (not on map ) another another deer joined and left. Just kept herself close to Kio and Baby Mama Smell.

Lazed most of the day away. Then this happened:
[7:11:58 PM] The Real Slim Soli:
[7:10:59 PM] The Real Slim Soli: omg I just noticed Circe sitting on Sonali xDDD
[7:11:25 PM] The Real Slim Soli: http://gyazo.com/c12b8ccf3a7c04baa9ca1ddd4d5975e7 this was how my screen was
[7:11:35 PM] The Real Slim Soli: then suddenly http://gyazo.com/0cb33bb060aae46a52224e8b1db0292c

Totally happened.

Extremely comforted in the fact Circe was back to herself, glad to have the larger cub lying on top of her. Turned to give her younger sister a few licks of love and appreciation.

Lots of lots of dozing.

Later on played with Mama, Circe and Kio. Ended up "flying" and being a giant creep.





NIGHTMARES

(But then RL shit happened and ended up staying up all night. "Mum" was discovered sitting near Sonali. Appreciated you sitting with her, Mum! ;; )

August 10th, 2014

(note to self: Write the dream scene you had in mind.)

Unable to escape the rain, even after she cried herself to sleep.

Her Dreamworld was as it was when she first entered it, cloudy, dark, disconcerting. And now rainy. Even here, especially here, the rain fell in sheets and soaked the fawncub to her core. She bleated for help, for her mothers, her siblings. For Circe. She wasn't sure about Jyoti, but Sonali knew that Circe had the ability to come into the Dreamworld just as she could. Maybe they could meet up here.

Her bleat did not seem to be able to penetrate the thick cloud cover, or even through the rain. Shaking herself off, Sonali tried to find shelter. But there was nothing. Her hooves did not create any plants, nor sound. Nothing. But the rain pounded, creating an almost eerie hissing noise that was familiar but not.

Pelt felt absolutely horrid, worse than it did in the real world. She was able to, after a few hours, able to lick herself dry for the most part in the real world...but here, her tongue did nothing to ease the uncomfortable feeling. She had no idea that her Dreamworld was directly linked to her innermost feelings and thoughts. She had no idea this was her doing, and that she could stop it if she knew how.

Just ended up standing there crying.

Cried herself to sleep eventually there too, nearly drowning in her own tears.

Woke up late, having been saturated from the rain the day before and needed the extra time to recover from the abnormal cold. (AKA Soli was bloody busy all day with RL shit mmk 8|)

Was quite nervous at first. No Circe, still. No Mama either. Upon walking out, saw that there were odd red trees in the distance (mushrooms). Perturbed at their sudden appearance and perhaps replacement of other trees? Swallowed her insecurity and scented the air. Caught Mama AND Circe's scents from a distance. Bolted over and hid in the tall grass when she saw Circe with Mama.

Very apprehensive. Quaked on the spot, heart thudding. What was going on? Couldn't really make it out through the grass. Circe turned and seemed to notice, slowly coming closer. Bolted to her, smothered her in tearful nuzzles. "Stay", one word that Sonali knew very well from times where Mama would leave them at the den to hunt or check something out when they were really little. No longer wanted Circe to run off. Wanted her to be close like they used to. Very close.

Considered it a little family reunion, smothering each other in nuzzles and love, even mumbled a little scolding to her younger sister. Wished Jyoti, Tsa and Kitai were there to join in, the latter two big sleepyheads. But settled for the three of them for now. Went closer to Mama, and was given nuzzles by her.

Mama hid her face in a tree while Circe and Sonali sat together. Initially sat next to, but then turned to give the larger cub a thorough grooming. Was glad Mama finally sat down by the giant mushroom, only just now noticing that it was RIGHT THERE. Decided that investigating could wait, only wanted to make sure her sister would stay and was well loved.

August 8th, 2014

Last nights fears were a bit realized upon waking.
Noticed that everyone was in their usual places in the den, except Circe. The spot was not warm, and the scent wasn't as fresh as it usually was. Scrambled out of the den only to be hammered by pouring rain. Glared feebly up at the heavens and looked around. No sign of Circe, and no sign of Mama.

Mama came over and had to drive someone away from the den who tried to scent mark it. Once he was gone, exchanged sniffs and nuzzles. Was lead from the tree.

At first thought they were merely going for a walk, but after hearing her mother call out, felt a bit sick to her stomach. So they were looking for Circe. Unable to comprehend what had happened still, hated the rain even more since she knew her sister was out there, probably as cold as she was without Mama or their other siblings to warm them up, especially Jyoti.

Went to the pond with Mama who seemed intent on looking through the water. Did not understand the concept of drowning, let alone dying so just stood on the edge like a wide-eyed wet cat. Was appreciative when Jyoti showed up, sniffed and nuzzled him, glad to see that he was still here. Followed Mama around the pond, shaking water from her coat.

Stood under a little tree and helped Mama call for Circe while she seemed to scout the pond still. Was joied by Jyoti, being protectively stood over. Rubbed her head against his side, trying to ease the stress and anxiety. Where was their sister?

Followed Sha to the playground, searching all the nooks and crannies. Was startled by a random deer that came barreling through the playground cave. Chased after Mama only to find Shard following.

Sniffed the male and greeted him, but mostly focused on her mother and brother as they were still searching for Jyoti. Was lead to the old oak from there, used her small body to go in and out of the roots, still no sign of Circe.

Jyoti and Mama went to check some logs, but ended up charging full force into the Ruins. Looked absolutely everywhere. It seemed that none of them could find Circe, and Sonali could feel the sadness sweep over her family. Shahla went and seemed to press herself into a tree, Sonali and Jyoti joining her. Kept herself between the two of them. Unable to fully grasp this feeling inside of her, this crippling sadness. Only wants to see her sister again, the way its supposed to be.

August 7th, 2014

Woke up to find Mama. She seemed a bit...weird. Nursed and rubbed against her legs. Has no idea what occurred the night before between her mother and Circe. Likely won't be able to really comprehend it either. Jyoti awoke a short time after and Mama lead them to the pond. Saw this as a playtime opportunity. Mama sat too far away from the waters edge, so all Sonali's attempts at splashing her were thwarted. Instead got into a splash fight with Jyoti and rolled in the mud with him, only to rub all over Mama, just to see her smile or even threaten them with her flogging hoof. Something. Stood over Mama with Jyoti protectively for a while, before getting tired and slipping over the side and sitting close to Mama.

Dozed off after a while, and awoke to find Mama gone and replaced by Aunty Kio. Perturbed at her mothers disappearance, but figures that maybe Mama isn't feeling well. Settled that Mama was tired and cuddle into Kio, not particularly liking the cold water falling from the sky or the occasional roaring from above.

Mama came back and stood over them for a while, before Skadi and her companion invited them under the weeping willow near by. Moved close to the trunk and smooshed herself between it and her mother. Wisteria showed up at some point too.

(I am so sorry Wisteria, Sonali wasn't trying to ignore you but the familial tension was just killing her ;; )

Coaxed Circe over when she lingered around. unsure why she didn't just come over to sit. She didn't seem to want to get any closer which bothered the golden fawn. Got a ton of nuzzles though. Probably to ease her worry? Horribly confused that there seems to be distance between Sha and Circe. Anxiety started to grow quickly.

And then this:

Sonali: "YAY FAMILY-GAH, damn leaves and wetness and EYEBALLS FULL OF WETNESS"

Even more confused when Sha nuzzled her, but didn't Circe. Did something happen between them? So very bothered by all of this. Sat with Circe somewhat in the rain. Anxiety growing. Grooming her sister to make her feel better, as well as herself. Feeling more and more insecure, especially when Circe got up and ran off. But luckily she turned and came back. Got nuzzles from her. They both sat under the tree this time. Shivered. Sick feeling in her stomach. Curled up closer to Circe and swallowing tears. Didn't realize Mama had moved off, just wanting this feeling to go away.

Dozed off (friend was showing player something), and came to to find Circe gone. Looked around and sniffed the air, but couldn't figure out where her scent went. Contemplated joining Mama in the pond, but too cold and wet. Huddled up against the willow tree, grooming herself in an attempt to calm down again, anxiety far to strong.

Was soon joined by Wisteria, thankful for the fawns presence. Gave the fawn a few thankful licks, before going back to grooming.

August 5th, 2014

Woke up feeling adventurous after another peaceful night in her personal Dreamworld, where she made all of the musical chimes and dozing to the sound of bells and watched the stars turn and fall into the galaxy at the bottom of her world. Did not feel adventurous enough to go too far from the den however, keeping it within ear and eyeshot, as well as close enough to sprint to should she need to flee from something.
Stood within some tall grass, watching it sway above her and looked across the fields of grass within the birch, only to see movement coming at her. Instinctively stood still, but upon seeing it was Wisteria, felt joy. Bounced around her newest friend until seeing Mama. Even more joy! Raced over to the tigress and smothered her in love and nuzzles. Licked her mothers face lovingly.
Then queue the playtime!
Kicking up dust and grass, pranced around her mother and friend for a time before Shahla lead them off towards the playground. Curious as to where they are going, but excited that she is getting away from the den. Stretched her legs to keep up with Mama. A familiar scent hit her nose and she saw the red and gold form of Stria as they neared. Lots of happiness going around.
The three youths bounced onto the smallest rock on the edge of the playground and played on it. Fell off at one point, but it wasn't a far fall so just laughed it off. They climbed up the rocky ramp to the next highest rock, bounced on there but Wisteria fell off. Rushed to the side and looked down worriedly, but the small fawn had gotten up and was going back to join them. This happened twice afterwards, but seeing as the fawn was pretty fearless and unharmed, laughed and was glad she was ok.

Aunty Kio arrived! Nuzzles!

Watched Kio dance on Mama. Found this particularly hilarious.

Bounced more on the rock with Stria when Wisteria greeted a stranger. Felt abit anxious and just watched. Kio greeted the stranger.

Somewhere in there Wisteria vanished.

Settled down next to Kio and Stria when Stria did.

Stria left at some point and was joined by a cuddly Jyoti.

(Will elaborate later. damn RL -_-)

August 1st, 2014

Woke up to find Mama cuddling with Aunty Kio and Mama Smell. Was going to join in but was stopped by a pretty fawn (Wisteria). Immediately exchanged greetings and sniffs, and then started to romp around. Shoulders projected the usual magic, though not as intense as it once was, possibly due to the bloodloss a few weeks prior.
Still found it in her to bound around and chase the other fawn, even after Jyoti joined in. Happy to play with her brother. Mama joined in for a bit before plopped with Kio and Mama Smell again, after saying hello to Kio. Ran about and tried to catch a crow and frog hanging about, even got into a staring contest with a giant stag (Romulus). Seemed he wasn't really interested in them and pressed on. Did copy Mama's stare though. Yep.
After much running and bouncing, Jyoti settled down with Mama. Joined him after offering an invitation for Wisteria to join them.

July 31st, 2014

Woken up after a long night enjoying herself in the dream world. Sat and listened to the stars chime against the crystal floor, the magical light emanating from her wings pulsating with the tune. Had been visiting her dream world alot since the confrontation with Roanen, but only just not realizing it was the only place she could go to get true peace. Not that life isnt peaceful inside the den, the calm breathing of her sleeping siblings, the warmth they emitted, and the occasional hoot of an owl did wonders to a sleepless child. But her dream world became a place where she could sit and listen to nothing but her innermost workings, focus on them and know that this was her doing.
The waking world was still a joy, although slightly boring as she still felt weak. She hated the feeling. Though she was a runt, she always felt strong enough to play and romp around and eat to her hearts content. Physical weakness was new and bothersome, and she hated every moment she sat on her bum.
Noticed a figure coming over and while apprehensive at first, found herself intrigued with the temperament (Skadi). Very skittish of Mama who came charging over. Another came over too ("Rosesrelic"), but after greetings and sniffs, engaged in play with the smaller figure.
Played with Skadi for a while. then Kio came over and got uber distracted by the alien doe. Before she knew it, turned to invite Skadi and her friend to play and they were gone. Pouted a little, but bounced around with Mama and Kio again, then stood around awkwardly as Shahla's player ate noms. cB

Calm rest was disturbed by a kidnapper (question mark?). Was herded to the den by Circe through a tangle of legs. Confused as to what is going on. Cheered Mama on when she herded the deer away. Was content not to investigate or instigate, not in much a mood to flee so stayed by Kio as Mama was SUPER MAMA!

Rested some more, then Lilu left and came back with a fawn, her son, Sam.

[4:54:08 PM] The Real Slim Soli: Sonali is like "You're like my sister and other sister and brother but not like my sister and other sister and brother. Hi."

And staring contest. HI SAM cB



[5:05 PM] Jacklo: he gave her a pap with his pawbs with a face like o_o

And then babies sat with their mommies :3

July 24th, 2014

All of the snuggles with Mama, Circe, and Kio.

July 23rd, 2014

Made a Circe sammich with mama. Attempting to keep warm. Although fur is dense enough to keep out the cold, the blood loss from the other day took its toll. Snuggled into her sister and dozed.

July 22nd, 2014

The Gods of the forest graced the world with a bit of snow.
Woke up to a bit of a chill despite the warmth radiating within the den due to the bodies of all of her siblings. Poked her head out onto to have some cold white stuff fall on her face. Recoiled and watched this strange phenomenon for a time before Mama showed up. Retreated under her to nurse for a bit.

[12:08:55 PM] SOLI: Sonali doesn't know what to think about the snow
[12:09:54 PM] SOLI: Whatever it is. It's cold. Wet. And makes her nose feel weird.

Settled under her mother alongside her aunties Kio and Mama Smell.

July 21st, 2014

Spent the past few days holed up in the den, only slipping out to feed. Not eating her normal amounts simply because she has little strength to stand for long periods. Seeming to be getting much attention from her mother and siblings. The fear has worn off, though taken over by frustration with the exhaustion. Sleeps a whole lot as part of the recovery process. Personality however has not changed much if at all. Still feels the desire to be in the middle of everything no matter how tired and weak she is. Delights that her family is there.

July 18th, 2014

Over the past few weeks, was subjected to little more than the usual.
Keeping close relations with immediate family, including Kio and Mama Smell (Lilu). Has hardly grown since birth, maybe a few inches at best, still keeping her fluffy tiny figure. Appetite has stabilized for the most part, but does sometimes still go in for extra snacks of course, resulting in continuous pudge.

A very happy little girl, only starting to form simple, single or double syllable words like 'Ma', "Mama", "Kee-yo", "Yo-Tee", "Saa-Bee", "Kee-Tee", "See-See", and of course the sound of sniffing in regards to Lilu. Instinct to wedge herself between family members sitting besides each other is extremely high. No matter the tightness, will persevere even if her legs are every which way. Old friends are always welcome and is full of joy when meeting them and new friends. Very open minded and openhearted.

Until now.

The clingy fawn had been sitting with her mother and brother Jyoti for most of the day, relishing in being a hotdog squished between the two of them. But when Mama got up to visit the pond, tripped over Jyoti in an attempt to follow. Was distracted halfway, near the crying idol, when she noticed Roanen looking a bit upset about something, and seemingly attacking trees. The child watched him curiously, stifling giggles because she didn't truly wish to offend him.

But then he turned and they made eye contact. She felt her magic leaving her first, the wings on her shoulders shifting in his direction, forming globules of light similar to how it happens in her dream world. But the pain came next. Red liquid pooled out from her body and floated towards him as well. She wanted to cry out but her voice was stuck in her throat. Roanen looked as terrified as she did. She could barely move away, only flailing her hooves where she stood and soundlessly screaming.

Found her voice a short time later, shrieking on the top of her lungs. The pounding of hooves announced her mothers arrival. Barely comprehended Shahla herding Roa away, and her away in the opposite direction. Faintly realized Jyoti was there tying to calm her down.

With Roa gone, collapsed to a heap between her mother and Jyoti, getting licked and groomed and comforted by both. Pressed up against Shahla and cried into Jyoti's neck. Has no idea what happened, only that it seemed to hurt her, and it was caused by one of her friends.

July 5th, 2014

(Pardon the huge gap. Past two weeks have been hectic rl. Should be active again starting tomorrow.)
Got up and greeted Mama Smell who was close by. But then left her to find Mama with Nad and someone she didn't know (Rin). Was jealous of the obvious cuddle party and smooshed herself into her mothers exposed side. Wanted to be part of it too!

June 23rd, 2014

Found Mama early on, got nuzzles and nursed. Still has a bit of 'jet lag' from the journey, but otherwise feels rather spunky. Was lead to MAMA SMELL (Lilu; all caps is a must ). Sandwiched herself between both does and dosed contently. Briefly noticed Mr. Blake on Lilu's other side. Yay more friends. And then Jyoti joined soon after. Smooshed his face as best she could from her position.

After more dozing, noticed Mama had gone to the idol. Followed her after briefly smacking Circe with her tail on the way to Mama. Sat down to watch her over the side of the little drop into the stream. Sat with Mama for a while.

[6/23/2014 8:37:04 PM] SOLI: omg Ems
[6/23/2014 8:37:08 PM] SOLI: I just turned SOnali's camera
[6/23/2014 8:37:09 PM] SOLI: and
[6/23/2014 8:37:23 PM] SOLI: it looks like she is PERFECTLY supporting Sha's upper body
[6/23/2014 8:37:28 PM] SOLI: Sha you got a baby bra
[6/23/2014 8:37:29 PM] SOLI: xD
[6/23/2014 8:37:32 PM] SOLI: SOLI diessss
[6/23/2014 8:37:46 PM] Emseh: omf
[6/23/2014 8:37:47 PM] Emseh: g
[6/23/2014 8:37:49 PM] Emseh: LMFAO

Got up a little bit later to join mama with Circe and an unknown fawn. Was trolled by an obnoxious stag. loooooser. Then curled up under Mama with Circe, giving her sister loving licks. Fell asleep there.

June 19th, 2014

Got up and had to go find Mama. Found her with Circe along with some others (Halla, Fletcher, Umay and some fawns.) Plopped down behind Circe to nurse, to get rid of the tummy grumblies. Nursed for a short time before snuggling with Circe. Feeling content.

Mid June

After being out of the forest with Jyoti and Circe in Leia's world, returned feeling tired, but happy.
Spent the first day doing nothing, just catching up on sleep and snuggles from friends and family (Kio, Cassie, Kali, etc )

June 5th, 2014

Left the forest with her siblings Jyoti and Circe to go on a trip with their mother, Leia, to her world.

June 2nd, 2014

Woke up and charged off to find where Mama was. Found the tigress on the border between the forest and the Birch. Noted Halla and Isela very near, but Halla was asleep and Isela looked not far behind. Decided to let the mother and daughter snuggle, so flopped over her brothers back to awkwardly nurse for a bit until Mama got up. Darius was there (But Soli couldn't figure out who it was until after the fact -_-).

Then there was alot of play with her brother. Eve came over, gave the doe some love when it was offered. Then there seemed to be some sorta stare off between Even and Mama Smell. Sorta just ignored all of this and barreled down to give Mama Smell some love. Then bounced back past Eve who returned to Shahla. Also returned to Mama to finish nursing. Hungry baby is hungry.

Fell asleep for a while.

Awakened to Kio and Kettu there. Bounced around with the everyone. Very quickly noted a familiar figure, Nikhil. Although still doesn't know her relation to the male, did however stop what she was doing to stare at her brother for a moment, then quickly wandered over to sniff. Like Shard, sensed the need to keep her distance for their sake, though curiosity was still great. Yearning for some sort of contact was still there. And with that the male retreated. Felt a bit sad and hung her ears, but they perked when he turned and trotted back, his antlers full of purple flowers. Only when she was showered in them did she realize what was going on. She briefly remembered her mother doing the same to her once, but this seemed a little different especially when the male, who usually made it his business to keep a bit of space between them, came over to give her a nuzzle. Very happily returned the sign of affection, even when he retreated soon after. Very, very pleased to finally get some contact with the male that wasn't through brief sniffs and simple nods. Did however, notice that something felt off about him. Something she couldn't pinpoint. Something almost familiar and a little terrifying, but it was quickly forgotten. Proceeded to watch him for a bit, before the distraction of play called her.

Tsa came. Ecstatic that her sister finally stopped being a sleepyhead and promptly bounded to her. Many nuzzles and licks of affection before a big romp. Played with the others until everyone settled down. While Kio and Kettu were daydreaming, made sure to rub their faces with her own to show she loved and appreciated them both, before going to sit with her sister Tsa and Jyoti. Decided to dote on her younger sister, so eagerly groomed her.

Fell asleep a little while after.

June 1st, 2014

(Aaand Soli forgotted)
Lots of playing with Mama, Jyoti, Kio, Circe, and Kettu.

Mama got upset because she got sissy antlers. Jyoti gave her better ones. But Sonali gave her best ones >

Tickles and Isela joined up when the play moved from home to the idle and finally to the Oak

Played for a short while then was lead away to the big rocks.

Started an airsit battle. Totally won by being the first on the rock. or rather...in it.

Then everyone got on, but Sonali got in the perfect spot; in Mama's antlers. Circe was moping on her own rock.

May 31st, 2014

Naturally found Mama and after nursing quickly played and loved all over her. Had fun darting around the tigress' legs. During the playtime was lead over to meet someone new, Adutron. Of course was a polite little girl, sniffed and bowed; probably should eventually learn that bowing should come first, THEN sniffing. Either way, found the stag to be alright and nodded approvingly before going back to bounce after Mama.

Jyoti and Stria showed up to join in the play (or I think Stria was there with Kio and someone unknown, I can't remember ;;). In the midst of the play, got into a bit of a heated chase after Mama who consistently laughed at her for failing to properly scent mark continuously (AND BECAUSE YE OLD BUTTONS NO WORKY :< ). Mama seemed to give alot of praise for not taking her crap and eventually started cowering and even hiding behind Jyoti. Started to feel a bit bad for tearing after her and headbutting her legs and poking her with tiny gold hooves. Gave Mama lots of nuzzles and spoke alot of babytalk rambling to tell her it was alright and that she was sorry for being a meanie baby.

Went on to bounce around with Jyoti and Stria, as well as a new deer. Noticed he smelt a little like Stria and how the two clung together. Somehow made the connection that it was similar to how she was with Jyoti and her other siblings; they must be family too. Immediately approved of this one due to his relation with Stria. Ran around for quite a while, trying to mimic Stria's incredibly accurate and tight spins she did. Fell on her face more than a dozen times but did so with a smile on her face.

A little while later, went and sat under Mama, panting from all the play. Laid there and groomed herself when Jyoti settled next to her, Stria and Rune cuddling nearby. After finishing grooming herself, turned to groom Jyoti.

Dozed off somewhere and came to to see that Kio and Kettu joined them. Moved over with Mama and Jyoti, promptly giving the two love before cuddling with Mama and Jyoti. Circe came later, but didn't have the energy to budge and was glad she settled into Mama's side.

Fell asleep there.

May 29th, 2014

Had a nightmare.
Was swallowed up in darkness that threatened to to snuff out the light around her, light that she herself produced. Could only run, not sure how to fight back, and only feeling fear. Woke up only from a sliver of light entering the den, shocking her awake. Dazed for a few moments, but come to realize she didn't remember her dream.
Ran off to find Mama, an undeniable urge to stay close to her mother burning within her. Found her mother and was quick to cover her in love before nursing. Then got up to give mama more kisses and love.
Hey, it's torment mom with spells day! YAY! They spelled each other with the same mask (orca). Enjoyed playing with her mother and pushing her legs and sassing the older doe. Was joined by Kio later on, and played with the doe as well as receive many nuzzles. Hoped around with everyone until a cute deer came along (Eiji). He seemed really shy and skittish, and didn't want to get close, so sorta may have sassed him a bit and teased him by getting really close to see his reaction >u> But in the end helped coax him to sit with the group.
More play with Kio and mooing at strangers. MOO! Stared at some trolls. Stood with Jyoti and groomed him ate his stripes. Then afterwards, crawled under her brother to sit under him as he stood guard. Fell asleep and was soon cuddled up with Shahla and Jyoti. Apparently has a fluffy butt good enough for a pillow.
Missed Circe :<

May 26th, 2014

Woke up still next to Kali who seemed to be awake. Bounced around her, noticing siblings close by. Poked Kali to try to get her attention. Failed. Bounced around her again and poked and prodded. Nuzzled. Gave her some licks, then went to join her siblings and an unknown fawn (Ridera), hoping Kali would see them near and join them when she wakes up from her day dream.

Fell asleep between her siblings, but woke up a bit later with Shard and Jyoti staring at each other briefly close by. Greeted her older brothers and tried to initiate play. Got Jyoti into it as well as Ridera. Tickles came up and joined in, though he seemed intent on getting to know Shardul.

Playing, then Shard ran off a few years and started acting weird. not entirely sure what was going on, sorta half watched and kept an eye on him as he ran in circles and banged up trees. Roanen arrived, he was added to the play as well As Sierra soon after.

Then many of the fawns seemed to start harassing Shard. Sorta just took in the events around her and watched with curiousness. Jyoti was pouty and then went back to the den (I think).

Met Mateo. Finds him preeeetty cool. Noticed how Tickles and Sierra react to him, and made the connection that they to him is how she and her siblings are to their mothers. Briefly glanced at Shard sitting by himself. Wanted to go sniff him again to make sure he was alright but remembered how he would dart from her and keep a distance. Will watch him from afar, for now.

Decided to settle down to rest, Ridera joining.

Joined Mama and Circe when they came over, nursed since she didnt get to earlier in the day. Apparently also slept through Thane attacking Walter.

Later on, got up to hop around Jyoti and Walter, greeted Sen and Kettu, happy she's coming around again with her friend. Bounced for a bit before settling again near Kio and Mama.

Got up because KITAI! Loved all over her younger brother, grooming him and even giving him a mohawk. Yep. Then suddenly cats and dogs errywhar. Hati, Faye, Ayslin, Soet all came over, and while they didn't exactly play as a big group, did still meet and greet and approve of their wolfishness. Also met Eve who Mama seemed to like. Found her very nice as well.

Played around and then got into a spell fight with Kitai. Gave Mama a pair of giant antlers that she flaunted around. Then stood still as Kitai groomed her. Purred massively as he did so, then settled down to cuddle with her brother.

May 25th, 2014

Dear god, what even happened yesterday...
Morning routine of waking up, snuggling against Mama and nursing, enjoying being the first one awake and can have Mama all to herself.

Got up to see a fawn watching them from close by (Isadorae). Remembered her from another time they met, so exchanged sniffs and greetings, and then got into a romp. Chased the grey fawn around for a while, playing and jumping over logs until realizing she was very far away from the den. Darted back to try to get Mama and Jyoti to come. (Did not hear Jyoti yelling at her ;; ) Was told they could go play. Met Isi and Ram. O_O

Sonali really was like this:

[5/25/2014 7:35:36 PM] Soli: Sonali is like
[5/25/2014 7:35:40 PM] Soli: "HOLY SHIT THIS THING IS HUGE"

//Soli is a derp, because Ram was surrounded by fawns moments later.//

[5/25/2014 7:36:19 PM] Soli: RAM ITS YOUR DESTINY

And then this when Ram mooed.
[5/25/2014 7:54:34 PM] Soli: Ram: SHUT UP YOU KIDS

//sobbing//

Alot happened, can't really remember ;; I think Jahi's babes happened by while I was in one of my AFK sessions... sad to have missed them ;;

Met Ciel and Neela again as well as Tickles (Indigo ;3) (can't remember anyone else, sorry ;; ). Had a massive play time with them, enjoyed teasing the big black and white stag:

[5/25/2014 11:18:42 PM] Soli: http://i.imgur.com/ssyjD24.png
gonna get all da ladiez ciel cB
[5/25/2014 11:30:52 PM] Faustt: He's a total babe magnet ;D

Play fought with Isadorae. Then sorta settled down into a fawn pile that slowly dwindled to just Isadorae. (Was kinda afk on and off last night). Circe came around at some point too. Much play. Such babies. Shahla is a baby magnet for sure.

Sonali did fall asleep curled up with Kali and another fawn, Adalynn.

May 24th, 2014

Finally met Leia, her Oracle mother.


<sub>click for larger version

These are slightly edited versions of MY posts in an rp. Sorry if anything sounds weird, it was late when we did this.</sub>

Slmost as soon as the childs eyes closed the night before, they reopened. But her eyes did not see the familiar world of the Forest she knew so well. This world was also familiar, but unfamiliar all at the same time. Pale clouds flitted around her as she stared off into space in surprise. As she went to rise to her hooves, she noticed she was in some sort of nest made of tiny white flowers. They smelled intoxicating, and she remembered smelling their scent recently. But that wasn't the only thing that startled the child. Twisting her head, she noticed that she had been cuddled up next to her sister, Circe. Jumping up, her hooves clanked against the crystalline floor of the dream world, her tiny hooves causing sprouts to form through the mist that covered the place. Looking to her sister, she moved over to nudge her awake. At least this time, she wasn't alone.

If Sonali had seen the world as Circe saw it, she might have been intrigued. But Sonali's world was one of sound, every nudge, every poke of Circe's hoove caused the golden fawn's ears to twitch. But it wasn't just sound, but the strange plants as well. She thought about investigating, but her memories of the white pelt she knew so well came flooding back to her. She shot up, turning her head quickly, ears perked and alert. /Mama/ was near. She had turned to Circe and lifted a hoof to paw at the air in front of her. A short, sweet bleat was all she uttered before turning to bounce through the fog. Her hooves connected to the crystal floor and created a cacophony of musical sounds. The more she listened, the more the sounds seemed reminiscent of temple bells, though she had never heard of those either. Unbeknownst to her, her wings were flaring in all their glory. Being close to her magical mother made her inner magic erupt even more than being spelled with the devout did. It leaked out and flowed behind her like the lingering effect a lightning bolt would have on ones eyes.

And there, through the mist was the white doe she had been searching for for days. Sonali skidded to a halt, the musical beat of her hooves turning to a harsh screeching. The child was one of open-mindedness, ingrained mannerisms that spoke of a more proper upbringing. But now, even though she knew with the entirety of her being that the doe standing before her was her mother, she felt shy. The tiny fawn shuffled her front hooves and tilted her head, folding her ears back. Even through the lingering scent of lily of the valley, her mothers scent was strong and potent. This was her...but she seemed a bit afraid to move any closer, for fear she would vanish in the clouds that surrounded her like before.

The little fawn opened her muzzle and uttered a little bleat. The tone was one of confusion, question. She wanted to know if she could approach and fear the warm fur of her mother, and not be disappointed with the unconquerable substance the clouds around her made. Glowing eyes swelled with tears, lips quivering as she pleading to her mother and the world around her. Please, please be real.

Hesitation caused Sonali pause. This world, while familiar was unpredictable. She remembered the one time she lost her voice, the time where she caught of flash of white through the clouds, and another time where she thought she smelled her mother. But standing before her was the white doe she knew so well, yet not at all. Unlike her sister who saw a visual representation of the gap between her and their mother, Sonali was merely too afraid to lose the connection she yearned.

After a few moments of lips quivering and eyes threatening to unleash tears, the tiny child straightened up and took a few delicate steps forward. The closer to Leia she got, the more the clouds of uneasiness around her disappeared. Instead, the clouds began to sink below eye level, allowing Sonali a clear view of what was above her. The world above was dark, pitch black save for the subtle tint of blue. Within the abyss above her shone thousands of stars that continuously moved at a slow pace. This was the visual representation of Sonali’s sense of wonder, as expansive as the universe itself.

Once she was a few feet away from her white mother, the smoke surrounding their hooves melted into colorful puddles on the floor before solidifying. It was as if the floor itself was made out of thousands of opals melded together into one before turning completely transparent save for a few cloudy spots here and there, like pure quartz. Though since the floor was translucent, Sonali could see the stars that have yet to reach the horizon, and the ones who had sunk below.


_{click for larger version
This image is compiled of numerous resources by me.
Sonali by Niriya, bg and plants pulled from Google images.
This was made simply for a more visual representation.}

Peering up to her mother finally, her sense of wonder turned to joy. Shoulders continued to pump out magical energy, but instead of forming into wings that faded at the tips like flashes of lightning that lingered on ones retinas, instead spiraled around the little fawn like blobs of liquid light, flickering and emitting color that was never there before. Lips curled into a smile, large ears twisting to face the white doe. Every ounce of the child was full of love for the one who had helped bring about her creation, as well as her siblings. She turned to glance at Circe, giving her sister a few short bleats to get her to come over, before looking back to her mother. A loud purr erupted from the little ones throat as she took the final few steps forward, muzzle lifted with the hope of receiving a nuzzle, even going so far as to lift herself onto her hind legs weakly, much like she did to receive love from her birth mother, Shahla.

Sonali put her all into the nuzzle, much like a kitten would, still purring loudly. She loved every moment of it. Finally the teasing world allowed her to touch the white doe she knew to be her other mother. To others the knowledge might have been startling, but to the golden fawn, nothing felt more /right/. As Leia took steps closer to Circe, Sonali pranced next to her. The fawn heard the toll of bells when her tiny hooves clicked against the crystal floor. Shooting stars darted overhead, signifying her excitement and happiness. She watched with a smile on her face as the white doe and Circe had their meeting for a moment, but then her eyes peered around her. She had seen the stars in the forest, but there were no trees to block out the stars, and everything looked so...vast. Until she met her mother, nothing around her had mattered. Not the sky above, the crystal below, nor the bells that sounded with each step taken by her sister and mother. But now, it was all becoming very obvious, and curiosity took hold of the child. She pawed at the ground, hoof clicking, a wind-chime like effect ringing in her ears when she dragged her hoof against the surface. It wasn't startling to the child, but it did cause her ears to perk, especially when a small plant bloomed. She leaned down and poked it with her nose, the potent scent of lily of the valley filling her nostrils. She huffed air out of her nose quickly, standing up again to peer at her family.

The golden fawn had paused to curiously watch her sister interact with the plant. Nothing seemed to happen though. It was very curious, though her ears fell back at Circe's sigh, further recoiling when her younger sister flopped on the ground. Was the thing bad? She took a step back, but when Leia suddenly moved forward to nose the sprout, the tiny fawn moved closer to investigate. Her ears perked forward, studying her mothers sudden facial expression only to mimic it. Though as she huffed out air, it became a bit of a raspberry of surprise upon seeing the white mist. Stiffening up, she stared wide-eyed at the cloud her mother had formed, watching it merge with the sprout and it disappeared. The child bleated in surprise, and once more when her sisters grew. She turned to look at her mother as she spoke, not understanding what was said, but noting the tone. It sounded something like Shahla would say, and the little child bobbed her head and shifted her front legs; the sign of approval.

Sonali was happy. Her dreamworld finally opened up to her. Seeing her mother for the first time, though feeling like she had known her for eternity, was like a great weight being lifted off her shoulders. She had been staring up at her mother when she noticed the white does gaze move skywards. Though she had never seen snow yet, the stars would have reminded Sonali of such, the way they trickled down. To the runt however, the stars did not join the sand she couldn't see. Instead, the stars passed through the crystalline floor to join with the stars below that had suddenly formed into a giant sea of a galaxy. Each time a star hit the ground and fell through it, the beautious sound of bells chimed. The little girl was so focused on this new occurance that she didn't notice her mother lying down until the doe called to her. She turned and did not hesitate to press herself up against the white doe, looking around to Circe with the hope her sister would join in; and then quickly giving a bleat to usher her sister like her mother did. Though the ground was hard, it didn't exactly feel so to the little fawn. It felt plush and pleasant, much like the den back home. She turned her head to her mothers shoulder and pressed against it lovingly, somewhat of a farewell though the child didn't know it yet. Her head shifted to her legs, where she curled up comfortably. Eyes closed, and was lost to the stars, her conciousness waking up in her home world.

And then she awoke for the day feeling incredibly refreshed, though forgetting what had heppened in her sleep. Aside from her siblings being asleep, got up and crawled out of the den to find Shahla gone. Found this curious and took advantage. Had scented her far off, and decided the would be a big girl and find her mama. Got lost in the forest for a few moments, but eventually found her mother overlooking the giant water. Bounced up behind her, greeted, nuzzled, loved all over. Then nursed, because belly growlies are the most obnoxious things in existance. Then settled down to digest a bit.

Jyoti joined after as while as did Kio and bounced around with her. Then Cassie joined in, yay! Has taken to the brown and cream doe very much. Romped with her family and friends, pausing only when she noticed Kettu. Went to inspect, knowing something was wrong. Briefly greeted the other who was with her (Sen?). Then did some sitting over Mama's back.



Then Mama led everyone off, seemed someone nearby was making her nervous. Didn't care though, made sure to give Kettu a smile as she ran past though, and hoped the vixen would come by soon to play. Bounced after her mother. Definitely does not like the oaks humming (so Soli got rid of it LOL). Hopped and played around and just had a good time until settling down for a while. (Soli was uber semi-afk)

THEN THIS:

(Gif courtesy of HolyMaria!)
i will seriously update soon but omg this is what happened pretty much (but with alot of deer including: Circe, Jyoti, Shahla, Kio, Cassie, Rojan, Cree, Jahi and her two girls Ronra and Ahn, Walter and Stria. As well as some unknown characters holycrapguys)

Definitely made alot of friends today. Settled down in a fawnpile and fell asleep.


Previously

May 23nd, 2014

Very lazy day. After nursing, dozed with Mama and Jyoti. Kio and Stria appeared, as did Kali who was cuddled up against someone new (Azaq something or other x.x; ). Got up when she felt Stria get up and wander about. Then was engaged in one of the most active play sessions. Bounced around, ran around chased around and even roughhoused with the red fawn. Had a pretty awesome time, giggling loudly as she chased the older fawn around. Pretty sure there is no more grass left where the play took place, which was around the family den. Only settled down when Stria did so, flopping over her back panting and cuddling between her, Shahla, and Jyoti. Feeling very warm and happy.

May 22nd, 2014

Visited other worlds in her dreams, though they weren't the lucid ones of her personal dreamworld. Tried to hunt with her siblings, but they all got lost in the tall birch grass that seemed to grow like the trees themselves. Found rabbits the size of herself, which was actually kind of terrifying, but still amused by it none the less.
Other than the weird dreams, woke up a few times throughout the night for unknown reasons, ended up being a sleepy baby most of the day. Curled up against mama for quite a few hours, reveling in her warmth and closeness. Starting to develop a sort of obsession with being the first one there.

Then Soli was having massive problems with TEF. Set wouldn't load, kept freezing. New tab, lost set, had to get set back. G.D.I.

Mama seemed upset about something, but there were too many babies to really dwell on it. Played with Jyoti, and later Stria after an attempted rescue from a harassing deer. Mama was still upset with something and seemed to want everyone away from her. Felt a little weird, but thought maybe just to let mama have her space until she went to sit with Kali (who had been nearby but unresponsive. Likely my stupid connection.) Tried to get her mother and Kali up to play, but the two seemed intent on sitting there. Oblivious to the tension. Neela showed up, and the four played around until Neela ran off.

Was kinda in an out of it most of the night, giving up trying to get Mama's attention and instead just continued playing until setting down next to Kali and dozing off there. Briefly noticed that everyone but Kali disappeared, so clung to the wolf pup. More dozing until seeing everyone had come back. Crawled into the den to sleep.

May 20th, 2014

A very unusual night, as Sonali did not have her normal dreams. She did not go to the dreamworld, she did not smell the lily of the valley. Just blackness. No feelings of frustration or glee, just pure and utter calmness. Perhaps from being waterlogged. Woke up and immediately went to find Mama to appease the growlies in her belly. Met her mother halfway and had a bit of a romp session before guzzling away.
More playing lead to the discovery of a bunch of fawns in the pond playing (Roanen, Indigo, Levana and Sierra. Please let me know if I missed you! Map is NOT cooperating!) Felt a little shy at first. So maybe this is how Indigo felt when they first met. Crept a bit closer and got a sort of surprised greeting from a very colorful fawn (Roanen). Shyness evaporated and play began. Bounced around the water with her new friends. Lots of splashing, laughing, general playing. Followed the group out of the water and did more playing in the grass.
Indigo had come over and started being touchy feely? (at least thats what I am guessing for the time being xD) Giggles at his claws being tickly. Yes, definitely likes this one. Everyone sorta scattered after a bit, then went to settle down with Roanen and Levana, taking to sticking herself between them. Dozed off, only to notice Levana was replaced by Sierra, and a Kali had joined them. Sat contentedly, and started grooming herself. Water as fun, but not comfortable.
Dozed for a while longer.
Got up when Alabaster, Ember, and Kalidas came over. Yay! Hoped up to join Isela and Kalidas in play, but not after being a polite little girl and greeting the family. Bounded and expanded a lot of energy romping with her two fellow fawns. Enjoyed every moment of it. Met a giant red stag, Saosin, and a lion-faced deer-cat, Umay. Ooouuuuu! May have given the other feline some kitten purrs but got distracted again by her friends. Kalidas disappeared during the romp session and joined later. Got a little bonding time in with Isela by chasing her around. Not sure if the other fawn was actually leading a chase on purpose, but made some pretend growly noises anyway that just turned into baby giggles in the end.
Kalidas rejoined them, and after some more play, somehow ended up in the pond splashing each other. Went to greet a stag who suddenly disappeared. The turned to a rock-face doe (Alice), who seemed to greet them, then lead them out of the water and invited them to sit. Kalidas ran off, but decided to sit by Isela, very worn out from all the play.

And then player went afk to cook and back back to find people tried to greet Sonali. /ded
I'm sorry Mauv ;;
Still AFK.

Came back to meet Stria and Freya and tried to meet Heartstrings but shit happened and TEF wouldn't let me log back in. Sigh.

May 19th, 2014

Golden orbs pried open to see the gently flitting clouds of the dream world. Poked and prodded at the glassy crystal surface below her, feeling that familiar vibration and the resounding twang. Starting to feel comfortable here. Knows this place. Remembers it. Trotted around for a while through the clouds, ears perked and listening for anything other than her hoof steps, nostrils flared to hopefully catch her mothers scent, for this time she was sure the scent was not hers. Magic energy flowed from her shoulders to form her wings, but some of the magic flowed out and joined the clouds around her. And then, for a split second, she thought she heard a voice. Twisting around, ears perked, she looked everywhere. She could have sworn something was near her, and not the clouds. She quickly darted through the fog and called out. Today, she could hear the feeble bleat of her own voice. Faster and faster she ran, the sound of the crystals thrumming in her ears, matching her heartbeat.
Then suddenly, through the mist, she caught a glimmer of a white pelt. Shrieking in surprise and glee, the child ran towards her mother, she was sure of it.
Though it wasn't to be. As she bounded closer, the world began to melt as her consciousness started to come to. No, no not yet! Just as she was about to reach the whiteness, her eyes opened, and she instantly forgot what she was dreaming about. Sitting up, she did her usual morning ritual of stretching as she got to her hooves, then scrambled out to her mother. Nursing till she was full, she plopped against the does side and snuggled into her.

Got up once Jyoti did, and was taken for a walk. Bounced and pranced the whole way, bumping her brother whenever she had the chance. Met a deer, Mama didn't seem keen on him, but was curious anyway. Lead further until they got to the pond. Joyfully jumped in and splashed her mom and brother, but was also splashed in return. Got herself covered in mud at one point. Was okay with the feeling for a bit, but then promptly dunked herself in the water a few dozen times to get the clumpy wet dirt off her fur. Sat in the water with Jyoti for a bit as he seemed to love it as well. From there was lead over to a patch of sunlight where the three sat. Spent a fair amount of time grooming herself. Circe joined them, then spent the rest of the night licking her face, head and ears until lulling herself to sleep.

May 18th, 2014

More dreams as usual. Presence of her mother keeps drawing ever nearer. Frustrated feelings even greater. Lily of the valley scent more potent. So slowly are things coming to life, coming closer. Inspected the dream world she continuously is brought into. The floor is a crystalline substance that makes very audible clicks when stepped on, and a fancy twang when struck harder. The source of the smell is unable to be found, no matter how far the fawn ran through the smoke. She did noticed that as she ran, her light wings expanded tremendously, and when she stopped moving they got normal. Perhaps the world was pure magic and she was feeding off of it? Bounced around the dream, in search of her mother and the source of the scent which she thinks might be her mother as well, since her presence and the smell come from the same direction (or rather, all over at once, she just doesn't know that yet.)
Finally woke up. Still feeling tired, from expelling her magic within the dream world. Crawled out of the den to nurse, but then crawled back in for the remainder of the day. A lazy day does wonders.

May 17th, 2014

Smoky dreams are becoming more lucid. Subtle scent of lily of the valley, though Sonali had never smelled the flower before. Was able to ever so slightly manipulate the smoke around her, and noticed some of said smoke was even coming from her illuminated wings. Her mothers presence is even closer now, but still unable to see her. Stomped her hoof, much like Mama did when she taunted at someone being mean, or Jyoti when he was being bad. Nothing, just the resonating sound of hoof against crystal. Tried calling out, bleating feebly. Unable to even hear her own voice, which startled the fawn. For the first time, felt true fear, though the dream was far from a nightmare. Frantic calling turned to crying, and the dream crying began effecting her sleeping form. Twitched and bleated in her sleep, magic sputtering out of her shoulders from the release of energy.
Gently pulled out of the den by Shahla and curled around. had awakened from the movement, and was eternally glad to see that Shahla was there. Pressed herself into her side. Needed to calm down before she ate. Ate when she felt better, but stayed pressed close to Mama's belly all day.

And then TEF allowed Soli online.

Played with her siblings Circe and Jyoti. Met Naddy-lady. Yoko joined in. Scented other things nearby, but not keen on exploring by herself, so stayed and made a cuddle pile with her siblings and Yoko close by.

May 16th, 2014

More smoky dreams, being teased with the faint presence of her other mother. Woke up feeling startled and a little distraught again. Called out for Mama, and scented her a bit far away. Darted off to find her but met her halfway. Felt relieved and happy. Romped for a few moments around her mother then nuzzled happily. Stomach gave a rumble, and quickly took to nursing to get rid of the irritated feeling. After she was done, settled down underneath her mother to digest a bit.

Moved when Mama did, looking over to see a wolf pup (Kali). Extremely curious. Sorta reminded her of Tsa and Kitai. Played and played, had a grand old time with the strange wolf with weird extra limbs. Didn't bother Sonali in the least though. Played for a long time, bouncing around, running around, getting bopped by Mama and bopping back. Really happy to be making so many friends lately. Then noticed Mama take off after something through the grass. Laughed about it, but then she got too far away. Felt a little panicked, but kept her cool and told Kali to follow her. Ran after Mama and found she was chasing a rabbit. Laughed at this. Then the rabbit turned into a fawn. Started and darted away, but then turned. Magic. Felt it's power but what is it? Went over to inspect and sniff, then got distracted by Kali and started playing again. Bounced and darted around and all of the things for a while longer, then plopped under Kali when she stood still. Then Kali went and sat next to her. Turned to lick her stripes. Clearly does not yet understand that stripes are not edible :|

Then she had to go (Kali's player had to work :<). Spent the rest of the day snuggled with mama contently. Was lead over to her birthplace. Immediately knew this spot, the knowledge ingrained from her birth. It still smelled over family. Bounced around the spot, particularly the rocks which she rubbed all over. Then Mama Smell (Lilu /ded/ xD) showed up! Ran over to the doe though had to dodge her and her mothers happy antics. Couldn't help but laugh at the two of them. When they settled, gave Mama Smell a nuzzle. Yes, much love the one who looks different but smells the same as Mama. Then her mate came. Sniffed him curiously, then nodded approvingly. Greeted as well. Then sat under Mama for a time.

(Player was AFK for things and stuff. Sorry we missed you Nad and Hati ;; )

Then suddenly babies everywhere! Circe, Kitai, Jyoti, and eventually Kali came back! Yay! Also met a new face, Kettu (and another fawn who I could not find on the map. Owl pelt and mask, RD antlers. Very cute!). Played and maybe roughhoused here and there. Smooshed faced with Kitai and Circe, and even Kali. Felt a little shy with Kettu, mainly because of the strange white thing on her face (skull). Not really able to smoosh faces with a hard thing. Still, enjoyed romping with the fox and even tried to smoosh the impossibly fluffy tails too. Ended up getting very tired, but pleased from the day. Previous frustrations were forgotten. Fell asleep cuddled under Mama.

May 15th, 2014

Woke up and flopped against Mama's side to nurse and snuggle. Had slept really good, except for the strange white smoky dream where she sensed her other mothers presence, but never was actually able to see her. Frustration. Also unable to try and communicate to her mother Shahla about it either. Further frustration. Pushed herself against her mother to shake the feeling, curling close to her belly.

Frustrated feelings dwindled over the course of the day, as did the memories of the dream and her mother. Felt quite content to sit in the sun at her mothers side, dozing most of the day and occasionally peering through slitted eyes. Got a little bored after a while, her energy wanting to burst (and literally through her shoulders), getting up to bounce around by herself, nipping at the tufts of the tall grass. Mama joined in, then quickly lead her off after beckoning. Bounced after her, happy to be moving around instead of being cooped up by the den. Too much energy for that.

Was lead to a bunch of deer with flat faces (Ember, Ausar, Alabaster, Kalidas and Rameses) like her sister Circe. Felt a little shy at first, but then started to play with them, though Rameses went to sit down after a little bit (and I apologize I was having severe lag issues with my computer ;; ) ROmped with Kalidas for quite a while, and even had a bit of a spar (just antlering each other and laughing really). Met Alabaster briefly, though he seemed less than impressed. Wasn't perturbed, too young to understand. Romp romp romp. Met Ember, a small silver deer. Didn't get a good sniff in but greeted none the less. Kio came over and joined the playing, and at one point even turned into a fawn herself. Laughed and played, had a lovely time. Met Alabaster again, went better, actually got a sniff and a nod. Score! Playing ended when Kal went to sit with his brother. Returned to her mother and stuffed herself between her and Kio contently.

Got up when noticing Kal had come back. Ember and the two stags were gone. Was curious as to where they went. Squeezed out between her Mother and Aunt, and plopped herself in front of Kali to stare at him (so rude, Sonali D: ). But when he inched closer. Much cuddles!

(And then Soli logged on to see that it never saved the rest of her diary entry...nnnrggghh.)

Long story short, played more with the two brothers until they left. Tsa came, and then Soli crashed and couldn't log back on.

May 14th, 2014

Woke up and called out for Mama. She answered the called and ran off to find her actually close bye. derp Bounced over to her to eat but Tsa was there! Yay! Bounced over to her and bumped her shoulder in greeting, THEN went to eat BUT a stranger came over. Seemed friendly enough. Was greeted and greeted in return. Then got nuzzles. Huh? Mama didn't like that. Pushed them away and was rubbed on by mama. Giggled at this. Apparently Mama and Aunty Kio are the only ones allowed to nuzzle. The stranger left after saying goodbye, got some love from Tsa and then went to eat. Because hungry.

Dozed off with mama for a while, then noticed Tsa was gone. Nuuu! Followed Mama to find Tsa, bounced all the way there. Then PLAY! Lots of play in flowers. Saw others off nearby (Va'Tiri, X and Sloane I believe.) Played for a while and was joined by two other fawns (Neela and one I do not know, sorry ;; ) as well as another a few moments later (Isadorae). Felt something odd yet familiar with Neela. Not sure what that is though. Did however feel the need to keep close to her to try and understand the feeling. Though play sorta made her quickly forget that.
SO
MUCH
PLAYING oh my gawd.
Off in the distance, Isadorae and Tsa noticed another fawn and went to go greet him, but he ran away (Indigo). Played for a bit longer when Indigo came back over. Inspected him quickly. He looked really weird, with thin thin hooves that split weird. Weird. But cute! Nodded approvingly as Tsa and the others inspected as well. Tried to get him to play, which lasted a little bit until some adults came over. Indigo disappeared.
Met Rat, Zuri, Pawn, Libertad and (another who's picto I just couldn't find ). Made friends with them, or at least to her anyway, romped until they left, Pawn the last one to leave and saying goodbye. Proceeded to play some more before moving to join the fawn pile.
Then Indigo came back. Tried to coax the strange fawn closer. (Not exactly sure if trying to get attention by poking or face touching but STOP BEING GODDAMN CUTE feshgukzsyhloghegoe). Didn't seem he understood she wanted him to join the fawn pile. He seemed to want to stand. So stood and bounced with him. At one point tried to give him a lick but he didn't seem to like that. Then he walked off, but seemed to want her to follow. Mama was still near. Decided to follow. Was lead to Va'tiri, C, and Sloane. Indigo poked at X a few times (Or Sloane?). Coaxed her out a bit, but then when Tsa came over, she seemed to duck back in the tree. Then Mama came over a bit to watch. Nothing happened until Va'tiri got up and Indigo ran off a few years. Watched everything curiously. Indigo tried to get close, Sloane skittish..ish. Went to sniff her while her back was turned. Then she finally came around to sniff and hop around. YAY!

(And then TEF died, causing Soli to spend about 3 hours fixing her comp and the game to force it to work. OWNED.)

AND SONALI IS BACK AND WENT TO SMOTHER TSA. And then fell asleep.

May 13th, 2014

Woke up and immediately snuggled up to Mama's side and nursed. Hungry from all the playing the day before. Content to be the first one up and get fed before anyone else. Ended up being a very lazy day of restng besides mama. Jyoti showed up, and mama took them for a walk and romp. Noticed a scuffle in the distance. Found herself more interested than afraid, choosing to stare at the two (X and...Nazzards Nightmare character I forgot the name and can't be bothered to find it right now ;; ). Va'tiri had called over to Mama, and Mama led the fawns away. Felt a bit irked she couldn't watch the fight, but was heavily distracted by a dozing Kio. Spent the rest of the night snuggled with her family.

May 12th - Early 13th, 2014

Spent most of the day curled up with mama and Jyoti, occasionally nursing.

Got up to play when Circe arrived, also playing with a birdy Aunty Kio and Darius. Romped around for a while. Got nuzzles from Kio when she changed back into a doe. Nuzzle nuzzles! Played a bit more, then Circe and Jyoti sat down. Saw Mama and Kio playing together a few yards away, spelling each other. Had seen her mother cast the pelt spell, and did the same. It felt so invigorating to get the magic for the spell, but releasing it made her a bit tired. Stood around in a sort of daze for a while.

Then came around again to play once more. Danced with Kio. Pulled off some awesome moves. Tried sassing mommy but NOPE. hehehehehe giggled. Then saw the sleeping deer (La) get turned into a squirrel. WOW! FOllowed her around and bounced and laughed. Then Mama turned into a bunny. hehehehe laugh laugh laugh! Then stoof under Kio with Squirrel La and Bunny Mama and Circe to dance.



Mama Circe and Kio went to sit, Jyoti watching. Played a bit with squirrel La, curious of the creature. Sniffed, nuzzled and bounced around a bit. Then when La stopped, curled up around her. Totally claimed. Fell asleep this way.

May 11th, 2014

(FINALLY FREE OF GRADUATIONS AND OWING SOME ART. Fekkin tired as hell......)

EATS ALL OF THE MILK BECAUSE HUNGRY!
Also pretty sure Shardul thinks her fluffy butt is her face because every time she tries to sniff him, he runs behind her! ;;

Tried to inspect him but he's too squirrely. ;; Then went to inspect the other doe there (Halla) (and also because I was afk when she apparently inspected Sonali the other day ffff sorry Torn v_v; ) Approved of the doe, and was going to inspect the little one behind her but Halla got in the way. Or maybe just got distracted by her brother Jyoti. The latter is more probably. Seemed like something was going on between Jyoti and Shard. No idea. (actually might just be my damn game fekkin up v_v; Being weird since i got on.) Also Aunty Kiooo! Greeted the green doe and gave her some love.

Or Jyoti getting yelled at for something. Clueless baby is clueless. Started copying Shadul when he tried getting Shahla's attention. Then pretty much did it to everyone in the vicinity. Then started to play with Kio until she turned into a fawn. WHAT!? Sniffed her all over. Felt the magic pulse, but didn't know how it occurred. Played with her until she went to sit next to Mama and Jyoti. Went and curled up to her brother.

Sister Circe soon came over. Promptly smooshed herself between the two of them. Because she could. Circe moved. NOPE. Not getting away that easily. Turned and went right for her ears. GUM THE FUZZIES!

Got up after lounging to bounce around by herself. Played a sort of hopscotch, falling on her face a few times but otherwise enjoying herself despite her siblings being lazy butts. Tried climbing on Kio and after a few tries successfully scrambled onto the does back and head. But then fell off in a pile of legs. Flails and pouted and whines. Wanted up! But then sniffed the air to find Mama, but was too nervous to go off on her own.

Ran around a bit more, then bumped into a tree. Was going to cry but then turned to the tree and yelled at it, taunting it and telling it off with babytalk. Owned, tree...owned. Wandered a bit farther than she intended into a patch of purple flowers. Bounced in them and tried to catch a butterfly but they were too high and too fast. When her back was turned, Kio came to romp with her for a little while. Was taught how to roll in the flowers. Likely getting dirty now, as she keeps doing so after Kio went back to sit with her siblings (Jyoti and Circe).

Got a LITTLE too carried away with chasing butterflies and bouncing in the flowers. Found herself going to far, and turned just as Kio called her. Ran back quickly. Was nuzzled and told to stay. Nod nods. All of the nods. Yes, Aunty Kio.

Played around by herself a little bit more, getting a wee bit tired. Was startled when Jyoti called out. Went over to him. He seemed sad. Why? Called to him. Sonali here! Again he called. Whaaa? Called back. Aunty Kio got up and nuzzled him. Nope. Dancing? WEE! Danced with Kio and tried to copy her advanced techniques but nearly fell over. Had a laugh. Jyoti wasn't having it. Kio did more nuzzles to him. Tried to mother nuzzle him too. Then Mama came back (when Soli was tabbed to write this obsessively). Got Mama nuzzles. Happy. And then Her and Kio had some lovings (or something cute and adorable ;; ) And then Kio left. Felt sadness.

But then mama initiated Play. PLAY! WEE! Forgot her sadness and played instead. Was then lead over to a rock with water flowing out of it. Wow. Had heard the sound, but now put an object to it. Absolutely fascinated with the spilling water. Was lead to the other side where it was easier to play with the water. Then Jyoti fell in? And he liked it maybe? Couldn't tell but didn't seem to mind the wetness herself.

After a bit of drying off, was lead through the grass to a bunch of GIANT rocks. Mama went up on the biggest one and watched her and Jyoti try to get up. Jyoti was up first, as he took a running start where Sonali picked her way up. CONQUERED! Oh yeah! Taunted the rock because she beat it. The Jyoti ran off to another rock with mama in tow. Had to figure out how to get off. Ended up jumping off and managed to not fall on her face. Took a while to figure out how to get on the other rock, and though getting very frustrated, somehow scrambled up. May have scraped her knees a bit in the process. Pretty pleased with herself. Celebrated with Jyoti.

Lead around over to the ruins. Reunited with Circe. Played with her siblings, some roughhousing and teasing. Sibling stuff. Mama was teasing too. Got antlers put on her by Mama. Flaunted them around. Awww yis. Tried to push Circe around playfully. Then Jyoti. But then they disappeared before she could to her older brother. Darn! More play, then Mama got flowers and lead them off. But then suddenly Yoko! Yay! Played with the fawn for a bit before being lead off again. Saw Shardul in the distance. Was told to stay back by mom. She seemed to bring Shard over. Did alot of bowing. And Mama was trying to coax him over it seemed. Really wanted to play with him, and found him silly. Giggled at him a few times, finding his awkwardness something funny, having no idea the impact her magic actually had on him. Cannot yet sense his magic however.

:And the mother of all staring contests consisting of Siblings and a random adorable Yoko:

Circe and Yoko fell asleep/left. Was the only one left staring intently at Shard. Felt something about him. Too young to know just that, but able to feel it, like a tiny flame inside of her core. It was gone the moment he got up to nuzzle Shahla and bow to them. Returned the bow awkwardly, pleased that she was at least able to sit by him for a time. Was able to memorize his features a bit more. Ended up staring at his weird horn antler thing. Big, curious sun eyes. When he left, went and curled up next to Mama and used Jyoti as a pillow.

Fell asleep, very content.

May 9th, 2014

Was up and at em when Mama came around. Happy to see her mother and got nuzzles that she happily returned. Then went on to feed to her hearts content; no competition with the others still asleep, after all.

SLEEP.

May 8th, 2014

(Sorry been inactive, had to deal with RL things )
Woke up and had to sniff Mama out who was just over the hill. Bounced over to her. Did a little circling around her legs and was circled around in return. Got a kick out of Mama copying her and laughed. Was lead through the tall grass into the main forest and finally over to a patch of purple flowers. Fascinated at the purple things, hopping through them until Mama gathered some up. Had them put on her head and back. But sneezed them off when they tickled her nose. Laughed at this, and did some more bouncing through the flowers. But then got hungry and decided to gorge herself. Afterwards, plopped down in the flowers with a full belly and decided to test if the flowers were edible. Gummed them, then spat them out. Blech. Instead nosed at them, pushing them around on their stems. They smelt nice. Started to rub into them; she is part tiger after all. Flopped on her side and rubbed into them full force. Started making noises akin to purring.

Laid there for a bit until Aunty Kio and Jyoti arrived. Bounced around for a bit until two BIG black creatures came over. Seems they were interested, but then both moved off to stare down another big creature (Romulus). Watched curiously until the one moved off, then the female wandered over (Va'tiri) while the male stood a bit back for a bit (X). Sniffed and sniffed, then she sat down. Walked around her and sniffed, eyeing the blue glowing markings on her. Like Jyoti! Did this for a bit, then noticed Mama and Auntie Kio trying to coax Jyoti over. He was scared. Bounced over to him and tried to nudge him over. See glowies! Didn't work.

Bounced back over to Va'tiri and X, sniffing them both and approving of their glowies. Here, have a stamp of tiny baby approval! Went back to get Jyoti, but returned to find the two large creatures moved off a bit to sit by themselves. Was going to go over and try to gum their glowies, but Aunty Kio instigated play. PLAY! Bounced with her in the flowers while Jyoti sat under Mama. Then finally Jyoti joined the play, as did Mama moments later. Bounced and kicked up her legs and fell on her face at one point. Ouch. Shook herself off and kept going. Jyoti seemed to have gotten tired, so plopped down on his back and licked his stripes. Noticed Mama and Aunty Kio bouncing around each other and being cute derps so got up to join them. BOING!

Then Kio went and sat down with Jyoti, so turned to wiggle her way between them a bit so she can continue licking Jyoti's markings. Mama took up spot besides them and created baby sammich. <3

Slept for a little while, getting up when seeing Mama bring over red flowers. Was curious. Things turned into a sort of school lesson. Was lead over to these strange rocks (Ruins) and brought inside this little section with a raised rock. Mama lept onto it easily, but watched her in awe from way below. But awe turned into confusion. Could not for the life of her find a foothold to get up. Frustrated beyond belief, began to taunt the stone. Mama seemed to find it funny and joined in taunting and yelling at the rock. Kicked dust on it as she was lead back out and around the corner to these round stones. Went to the biggest one first. Tried to see but it was too tall. GRR! Taunted it! Then turned to see a itty bitty one. YES! Went over to it and promptly claimed it as hers. Hey ma, look what I found. Aww yeah! Found a little bit bigger one. Hm, a bit too big but she could at least see the face carved onto it. Mhm!

Lead around a bit, and then over to a fallen log. Pocked it and prodded it like Mama did. Did some hops over it. Then got a head start and charged over it with a flying leap. SUCCESS! Was able to apply the brakes in time and did not fall on her face. Owned log. Got approving nuzzled from mama! Followed the tigress over to a mushroom circle. Poked all of the mushrooms, but didn't dare taste them. Remembered her flower incident earlier.

Jyoti came over after a bit. Played and sat with him and Mama for a while, even falling asleep on him after licking his stripes. Somehow trying to will the fire to come back. Sparklies.

Woke up later with mom gone. Panicked for a moment, but then saw Mama coming over with Circe. Bounced over to greet her sister, Jyoti coming over as well. Circe nudged Jyoti a bit, then Mama was off to show the siblings something else. Bounced around behind her until they came to a giant puddle of water. To Sonali it was like...the ocean! WOW. At first didn't really like the water. Cold. WET. EW. But seeing her sister and brother seem okay with splashing around, and after getting splashed by mama (and sassing her like a proper sassy baby muahahaha), decided it really wasn't that bad after all. Jumped in and splashed about. Tried to catch some of the flying things (dragonflies). Then somehow made the mistake to fall over while laughing in the water. SOAKED. WET. COLD. OH MY GAWD. Ran out like a bat out of hell shrieking. Then sassed the water.

Took a moments pause (for player to write this LOL) and itched herself on a tree to try to dry her pelt. A pinecone almost clonked her on the head. Nosed it and sniffed it before moving on to her family. Noticed strange creatures nearby (Darius and Cyrus?). They seemed to want to get close but kind of skittish. Stayed a short distance away to observe curiously and quietly while Circe was braver to go up to them. Then defeated a deer who randomly ran over and scared Sha sorta and then bowed and poofed. Wot?

The two brothers ran off, then Sha went and got a pinecone to fall, ate it, and produced magic! Spelled Jyoti who did not seem to like suddenly sprouting antlers. Was at first, terrified of this transformation. Ran a few yards off, then turned to watch Fear turned to fascination. Sniffed Jyoti all over. Then went and prodded Mama. I want some too.

Jyoti ran off to pout at a tree because Mama laughed. But tried to make her get magic again. Do it to me mama! Was indeed spelled after a short time, and after sniffing Darius (Or Cyrus? Sorry;; ) Got a pair of golden antlers, but was unable to see them herself. A bit annoyed at this but knew they were there. Had been blinded by the initial burst of magic but felt the surge run through her. Found herself almost...energized by it.

Mama went and lead them off to the pond again, where they met Eve. Was the first one with courage to bow and go up to her. Seems there was approval both ways.

More chasing Mama around a bit. Learned how to pray at the two weird rocks. Was then spelled by Mama, and donned a snow white pelt.

And suddenly LARGE BILLOWING MAGIC WINGS OF LIGHT.

Ran around like crazy, embracing the magic she was feeling.

Did this for a while until the spells wore off everyone. Followed her sister and brother who went to inspect another fawn (Murmur). She seemed a bit scared. Copied her scared motions. Sniffed and nodded approvingly. Then sat down with siblings again.

May 5th, 2014

Slept through the night without an issue, curled up with the rest of her siblings who provided much needed warmth. Woke up with her sister Circe besides her who appeared to be the first one awake. Did all of the stretchies before mom appeared outside of the entrance. FOOD. Quickly darted out to get first in line despite her size. Did indeed fill herself up before lazing on her side in the grass. Very content with a belly that no longer yelled at her.

Noticed a white deer in the distance, and sensed his mother and Lilu's concern. Stayed back, but her curiosity was too strong to keep from running. Imitated the male who kept scratching his antlers on the trees. Even did so to the den herself. Had noticed some other deer nearby (Kuroi and Roanen?) but was too preoccupied with her siblings and Lilu and the aggressive male to actually meet them properly. Stayed close to her siblings and Lilu.

Lots of fighting, Mama kicked butt though. Got help from a gold deer (Shfits) and Asya as well as another unnamed white deer. Freaked out when she nearly got stomped on by the big white who charged at them. Hid in the den. Cried out at the deer, her way of telling them to go away! But eventually it died down. Noticed another deer who had come to get Asya (Helios). He didn't look good. Didn't go over to him though, stayed with siblings and Mom.

Then Jyoti exploded, literally, in to flames. Was very alarmed, blinded momentarily since she was literally on top of him. Stumbled around shaking her head. Then went to investigate. Found her brother trembling in the grass, still flaming. Was extremely curious and sniffed him. Mama came over and calmed him down, his fire dying out considerably.

Was lead back to the den, and promptly sat next to her brother and tried to lick and eat the fire on his stripes. Failed but still tried anyway. Lulled herself to sleep with her head over her brothers back.

Awoke up later on with her mother and Kio nearby. Was urged to follow, mom seemed worried. Charged forward (what are breaks?) and found her siblings and two strangers near. One of them got up (Cyrus?) and Mom took off after them. Met a new fawn (Yoko) and played with her, Jyoti and Circe as well as Mom (who came back after running poor Cyrus off again) and Kio. Learned to dance from Aunty Kio. Found it pretty fun. Then Yoko left and Circe fell asleep. Mama brought Circe back home and was led back by Kio. Charged off like a crazy girl and (WHAT ARE BREAKS!!??!!?) tripped over a root and went flying. Didn't let out so much of a peep but gave her head a good shake to clear her dizziness. Laughed even. Then went to snuggle with Jyoti.

May 4th, 2014

Mama came and nuzzled her awake. Belly gave a big groan. Ate for which seemed like all too long for a tiny baby her size. Went and sat under her mother with Aunty Kio nearby, feeling content and full.




More dosing throughout the day, content and warm between her mother, siblings, Kio, Lilu and the sun above.

Woke up to find her mother and sister gone. Got up alarmed and went to follow their scents. Followed by Lilu. Pranced around in a wobbily way. Noticed some stags off in the distance (Nik and Shard). Awkwardness. Nik came over, sniffed him. He seemed okay. Big! White one in the distance wouldn't come close. Lots of strangely moving closer with their mother, and having her stand in the way a few times. Once even herded them back. Alarmed at this and dashed away to sit with Circe. Then back to her mother with the two stags. Stumbled at one point and ended up darting towards the two (because player is a TARD and misclicked), causing both stags to run away. Confused as it seemed to cause momentary panic.

Stayed under her mother and feel asleep after feeding.

May 3rd, 2014

Woke up hungry again. Was alone though. Instead of screaming for her mother like she initially wanted, found herself distracted by the blowing grass before her. An orange form was soon seen charging towards her; her mother. Got up on shaky legs and was nuzzled. Returned the action of course. Proceeded with nursing until she was full. Planted herself next to the den.

Dozed most of the day. Awakened to cuddling from her brother Jyoti and Kio. Proceeded to sit there and gum her brothers ears. Apparently ears don't produce milk, but are fun to chew. Shahla came over and sandwiched the two of them. Enjoyed this greatly, continuing the gumming.

Slept on and off most of the day until approached by a creature (Hati). Had a bit of fun playing with the strange creature and even learned how to bow. Circe joined in and quite literally bowed at everything in existence (near the den anyway).

More resting and sleeping. Cuddled with her siblings and Aunty Kio. Didn't noticed Mama left to go somewhere. Noticed eventually, but just stayed curled up with Kio and Jyoti. Only when that uncomfortable feeling in her belly did she get up and let out a loud cry. Was pleased when mama came running. Ate her fill, then plopped down like the fat little cutie she is. <3

May 2nd, 2014

The first to wake up, aside from her mother of course. It was quieter. Proceeded to nurse to her hearts content, before flopping against her mother with a full belly.
The day was spent sleeping.

May 1st 11:15pm, 2014

Movement.
Dark. Warmth. Movement.
Pulsing. Shifting. Movement.
Anticipation. Releasing. Movement.
Break. Breath. Movement.
Open. Light. Movement.
Movement.

Took in her first breath surrounded by the blurred shapes of her mother, grandmother, Aunt Kio and Talullaah. Didn't so much as bleat after birth, instead opened her sunlike eyes to the large world around her. Breathed. Stayed close to the warmth who gave her life and milk, as well as the other small forms she "recognized" from the womb.

Preferred to rest in the grass while the rest of her siblings were born, huddled by her mothers legs. Memorized the big brown faces of Kio and Talullaah in the meantime. Alot of sniffing and gumming plants. Blech. Her mothers leg. Blech. Her sisters and brothers ears. Double blech.

Somehow in the midst of everything going on, managed to find milk and drank for a short time. Was soon relocated, not after some trouble with Talullaah getting directional-challenged. Enjoyed herself on the does back until Mama came to save the day.

Made it to the den with the help of her family and friends. Participated in a fawn pile with her brothers and sisters. Fell asleep there, curled up in their warmth.