Explanations, contacts, the uncertainty of my visits (&livestream offline)
May 5, 2011 - 8:46pm — EternalWanderer
This beautiful community offered me so many things I could create but too many plans for my low resistance to pressure and time limits.
Right now I'm in the community once a week, I post art once a month and I go to the forest once a season. I'm not very happy with that situation. I love the characters I created here for the first time. They are childish and reveal so much of my instability and yet this was the place that nailed my interest to fictional characters and art. I also love the people here. But I never seem to use the right words and always end up offending the people I admire with my joked seriousness or my acted-out childishness. I've never been good relating to people, although without the real-time conversations, that's alot less visible in virtual contact.
Everytime I close the laptop to go do something else, I remember all the gift arts I showed while they were incomplete, all the requests I promised, all the RPs started by me that I didn't answer, all the unfinished CSS, all the projects I had and it's not hard to guess what I feel about that. I'm dumb, rude and anti-social but I'm human :b
I suppose that's the very reason why I turn my backs at my plans instead of kicking away that burden, no?
I'm rambling already. I don't think many are interested, but here go my contacts; I doubt I'll teach myself organizing time in a nearby future.
MSN:
I've only used it twice so far, but I love knowing there's someone that will read me if I desperately need to share something.
livestream: http://www.livestream.com/puntasticproductions
I've actually created that yesterday. I haven't figured how to work with it yet. I'll often invite people from other places; if there are watchers I've met through PlaystationNetwork there will be probably pretty (im)mature stuff on the screen and heavy or just plain silly music on the speakers.
ººººººº~
PS, excuse the poor coherence, during school time I'm constantly under a writer block. It's like my mind is wrapped in a very thick blanket. I can think through images and structure thoughts, but when I try to translate those into words and actions, it's like I'm speaking in a foreign language and pulling the strings of a puppet. I just can't remember the right words or get my body to agree with me.
I also sound grumpy like wut. Not truth.
Awh, I came back to the
Take care (:
No need to apologize . You
You are not forgotten