Drifting but your eyes are open now. And there is light and waking. Good morning...good morning.
I'll wait for you. All of you. Until then, good morning.
She is dozing - vaguely, more of an in-and-out drifting of thoughts and waking dreams - when Mateo approaches, and it is the last scent she's expecting. She stiffens when he nears, does not lift her head or turn to look, because she does not want to waste the energy if she is just imagining things and it turns out not to be him. But then he settles in, and he is warm, and strong. When finally she does turn her head to look at him, her eyes are wide and red. Eraline had already resigned herself long ago to an understanding that she would never be close to the people her father called family; and Mateo, elusive as he is, has always been not much more than a strange sort of good dream that she has once in a while when the moon is shining in a certain way.
She remembers watching him during that strange and violent season - the season she met Bishop. He'd been fighting off another stag for the attentions of a very pretty doe, and her father beside her had sat, as enraptured as she to bask in his masculine glory. He is exactly the kind of male she would want to knock down a few pegs were he anything but family. Now he is sitting beside her, little space between them, and he is young and somehow still her grandfather.
"N-no...don't apologize." She says after a moment, embarrassed by the quiver in her voice and her probably more than a little apparent nervousness in his presence. She furrows her brows, confused for a moment as if she has forgotten she is injured at all. Then she breathes in and a sharp pain shoots up her side. That's right. "Ah...yeah, I guess. It's...from a lot of things." The doe turns away briefly to worry at the waters beneath her. The chill helps to numb the pain. "I've been doing a lot of stupid things lately. Just a little banged up from today is all."
A frown appeared on his mouth when he heard she was injured but he had expected it and he could only hope she would quickly heal. But the frown soon flickered into a small smirk, "A lot of stupid things..." he repeated, briefly recalling memories of fights, wounds and broken bonds. "I can relate, done that many, many times myself." He shook his head, that smirk still on dancing along his lips."In fact, I'm probably the king of doing the stupidest shit and you'd think it'd make me more wise. Haa!" He tells her with a dry chuckle.
For a second, Mateo looked away to let his eyes look over their surroundings, how peaceful this forest could be in little moments like this. But it was deceptive, the calm could be shattered in an instant with just a word or even the wrong look. It was never safe despite the beauty it could hold.
His attention returned to Eraline as an idea formed in his mind. His brows furrowed, "I know we don't see eachother often, but you are family to me and family is everything. I..I've been thinking of going on a trip somewhere, not for long and not too far but enough to get a bit of fresh air." his ears fell back as he paused with brief hesitance. "And just...Well, if you feel like maybe you need to get away too, you're more than welcome to come along." He gave a small shrug then and looked else where again, "It's just an offer, you don't need to make any hasty decisions now especially after the day you've had. But at least its something to consider."
Eraline cannot help the small smile that touches her lips as she listens to him brag about his exploits in stupidity. It is the first time she has ever heard him laugh or sound so merry. Perhaps one other time - when Dublin was there, the little green one whom she may or may not have offended. "You have a look about you that does not betray your words, I'm afraid..." She says softly, a gentle and affectionate tease. What he says next, though, makes her stiffen and her ears fall flat against her head. Trip? Far?
"You mean...outside of the forest?" The idea is so foreign to her that it makes her head heavy with possibility. The night before, her father had misunderstood her and assumed she'd planned to leave the forest. It is not the first time she has had to think about what might be outside, but it is the first time outside has ever felt real. Real enough to apply to her. "There's stuff out there? Stuff to see?"
The doe falls silent then as she considers this. What might it feel like to be the one leaving for once? What might it be like? What kinds of creatures would she meet? Most importantly, would it make her feel better? Would it make breathing feel less like a chore? By the time she thinks to look up at her grandfather again her eyes are shining with a wall of tears; overwhelmed by the idea of an escape, no matter how shortlived, the moisture dances on the rims of her vision. "I have a friend..." she starts, unsure of what she is saying but needing to ask, "who told me about this thing called a 'chariot.' It is some kind of contraption, he says, that makes you go really fast. Do you think...if we went out there, we could find one?"
She asks this and then her face grows hot, the silliness of the question almost too much to bear. She shakes her head and a few tears slip out from the corners of her eyes as she does so, mats the fur on her face. She offers him a soft smile when she opens them again and nods after a moment. "I...I want to go. With you. I want to see."
"There are a lot of things to see, but things not so different from here." He replied, although he wasn't certain. He had only been out for very short periods of time, mostly with Dublin when they'd leave to find a quiet place to rest. And they never strayed too far, just enough to get away and long enough to settle the little bird's nerves.
Mateo's ears fell back and he returned her smile, seeing her tears made him want to shed some as well. The sight clutched at his heart; was she truly in much more pain than he thought? If so, he felt like he could be useful now, to give her some relief from the heavy burdens she might be carrying. It was all that he could do. He laughs at her question not because it was silly or dumb, but perhaps sweet. "A chariot, huh? I don't think I've seen one but we'll definitely look." he told her with a reassuring nod. "You should rest now, you'll need it."
"I'm...fine Levi. Eating and all - really. Don't worry yourself over me. I'm just glad to see that you're alright - I wanted to visit you when you were hurt but so many things happened..."
"I understand completely, Eraline. I tend to make myself scare at times like this, anyways. However. If I am not allowed to worry over you and your health, then you need not worry yourself over me and my.. hindrance. Just... Just know that you can talk to me. About anything. Anytime. Don't.. Don't bottle things up. A doe can only take so much before they explode - much like I have in the past." There was a warning in her words, but also a quite understanding.
It is a moment before Eraline responds and then, at first, it is only a nod. She turns her head to press her human cheek against the doe's skull - however best she can reach - and shuts her eyes for a moment as she speaks. "My friend, you are a stable rock surrounded by weak and crumbling earth. I will remember, Lev...you have already done so much for me."
"I am about as stable as a wave crashing against a sandy shore." Mused the doe, lowering her head to allow greater access to her friend. A gentle push in return for the affection she was given. "A few good deeds do not make up for a lifetime of bad choices, and terrible actions. But. This is the least I can do for you. After all, what kind of friend would I be if I left you to drown in a sea of emotion?"
The doe dives into Leviathann's allowed affections with a firm, resolute kiss upon her skull where a cheek may have been had there been any skin and fur. She thinks she understands now, why the monstrous doe is important to Henna. She exudes an energy and warmth that betrays the ferocity of her voice and stature. Eraline is not sure if she should be pleased to realize she has formed such a deep attachment to her, or frightened to have another life on her hands to be accountable for. Will I ruin this too, she wonders even as she offers a small and tired smile. "A dear friend nonetheless." Is all she says. It's the truest response she has to offer.
The doe shied slightly at the kiss, as it was a foreign act of affection - and any attempts to try the gesture for herself would end in nothing less than face-mutilation. However, it was highly appreciated, and seemed to have a soothing effect on the giant. "A dear, dear friend," Leviathann agreed quietly, moving to drape her neck across Eraline's back and pull the smaller doe against her chest. It was gesture made to resemble a hug, and meant to offer some sort of comfort to the green female. "Rest now." She told the other doe, gently dragging her front teeth up Eraline's back in a - hopefully - calming manner, while grooming along the way.
Eraline grins softly but does not speak for a moment, letting the sound of the rushing water soothe her nerves. Finally, she glances up at the smaller doe, her eyes soft and apologetic. "I'm very sorry if I hurt you at all in the fray. You should try to rest and keep out of trouble for a while. I'm sure Morikiah will be fine. You did good today, getting him to drink."
She rests her head to the ground letting out a concerned sigh as she wondered how the giant was doing at this very moment. "Mmh, don't worry. That happens. You helped me more than harmed." She paused for a while. "I did my best, thought it would do good for him to drink or eat once in a while."
The doe nods, smiling a bit more now as she remembers how determined the smaller female had been to coax him out of the oak. "It didn't take much to get him out. I think that says a lot about your friendship. It's good he has you and the others who've been coming to visit him. I am not one to presume he's looking for validation of his worth, but either way he gets it. That's good for him too. So thank you, Doe Mariah, for taking good care of my big orange uncle."
Her smile was contagious, she couldn't help but smiling herself. She indeed was determined if she wanted to be, someone would call her stubborn. "I could have come and see him more often but I'm not a fan of too big crowds, so. Ohh, don't thank me. He has done a lot for me already and this is my way of paying him back. I'm honored to take care of him as much as I can." She nodded and let's out a brief chuckle.
"Eraline?" The ginger doe stepped forward, looking to comfort her friend from where they where, near the pond. "Is everything alright?" She was no expert, but currently in one of her calmer moods, had noticed stranger behaviour as the weeks passed. A gentle nudge on the shoulder with the point of her nose just to stirr the doe if she was resting.
Eraline is dozing in and out of consciousnesses when Sorrel approaches. Her mind is foggy and light, that sweet and airy feeling of coming down from a good high, the colors the mushrooms had shown her fading slowly into reality. She glances up away from the water to her friend's worried face and offers a small smile after a brief moment of contemplation. "Yeah. There's just a lot in my head. A lot going on right now and it's all very murky." The doe shakes her head before gently pushing herself into a proper sitting position, raising her head to meet the ginger doe's gaze straight on, her ears tipped back. "It's been a while. That's my fault. I've been so wrapped up in my own life that I haven't been able to see how you've been doing. My fault. Last I saw you weren't any better off. I...are you okay?"
Nodding slowly, the doe wondered exacly what had happened to her friend, especially with that dazed manner. She'd never tried those kind of mushrooms- it probably would have been dangerous if she had. "Do you need something to clear it?" Well, generally water was the best thing...but they were surrounded by that. Null and void comment, then. Perhaps the sweet smell of flowers would help? But these thoughts were interrupted, her own ginger ears pushed back in time with the other doe's. "I'm better." Going quiet for a moment before speaking, she looked away anxiously across the pond once, before daring to meet Eraline's face again. "They stopped eventually. I weeded out the issue, tried to keep myself away from others, so it was my fault too. But i'm fine- " Letting out a breath, she laughed a little to show it. "You yourself look a bit.....troubled?" Not quite the right word, but it would do, the doe decided mentally as she tilted her head a bit.
"No...no. I'll be fine and it will pass. Thank you, though, for the offer." The doe responds, rolling her head until she is rewarded with a satisfying pop in the neck, the release of tension making her feel more alert than she had just moments before. She turns her gaze back toward her friend's face and leaves it there for a while as she ponders the doe's previous behavior - the angry outbursts, the fear, the paranoia. Spending time with Phaios has made it easier for her to recognize when she is staying into the eyes of someone who has lived a lifetime of stories. She knows, can see in Sorrel, the ghost of those experiences. Whatever they might be. "I'm glad to hear you're better - and that you were not hurt in the process of healing. As for myself I suppose you could say I am in a process of my own. Loss and choices..." She casts her eyes away, somewhat embarrassed by her inability to be clear. The idea of telling her story right now makes her tired. "I am trying to build myself from the ground up again."
Wow, I had no idea Eraline would be gone so soon. Like Dinah Moon said, this will devastate Gustiro too. He only recently came to terms with Evania's death (and not exactly over it either). I am not even sure how he'd feel at this point when Eraline is lost. I am not even sure how to feel myself. O_O
Just to be clear. It is just Eraline dying? You as the player will still be around after her death?
I know this is going to be difficult for the deer still around Era who love her, but it's an idea I've been dancing around since before Christmas - to put it in short, Eraline's "center" has been lost. She is no longer herself the way she used to be and thus she is always sad, always depressed. It's become very hard for me to play her without taking a lot of that in. Moreover, my final college semester has just begun and I have a lot of goals that I'd actually set before last semester that didn't happen because I got caught up in TEF and other things. I need to do this for myself, and it wasn't an easy decision. Once Eraline dies (yes, she is dying) I will also be leaving TEF for the most part. It's possible that I might visit under Mouse every once in a blue moon, but mostly I just won't be active here anymore.
Thank you for explaining. Perhaps we will still be able to catch you on MSN from time to time. But I completely understand your decision to have her die. It is better then letting a favored character fade away. I know I hate it when mine fade. An end is more fulfilling. She will be missed. <3
"Goodbye, Little Fighter. You are always in mama's heart."
Trae - your little boy has always been a pure light in Eraline's life. He became her son from the night he stayed with her in the birch. I wish they could have seen each other more. Leaving him, especially after seeing him tonight, is going to hurt her bad. But she loves him and will always love him.
School comes first. Good for you for knowing your priorities. Unfortunately, I probably won't be able to make it in forest with Dinah tonight to say our final goodbyes to Eraline, but we'll just imagine we did. It's probably for the best anyway if this isn't going to be a natural death{?} as Dinah would die trying to protect her from a predator. She's going to be incredibly missed. Hope we can stay in touch, Cassie!
_________________________________
In moments like this, she becomes most aware of how cruel life can be. Her eyes swell up when she sees her dying friend, but she doesn't cry now. Her heart sinks into her stomach, but she stays strong for Eraline - she would only expect the young doe to do the same for her, and to be a pillar of love that Eraline has been for everybody else. "I'm here, Era." Her voice is steady yet tender as a single goddamned tear escapes before she shakes it off of her face, before anybody can see. "I'm not going anywhere." she quietly whispers as she takes a seat next to her friend, and within the remaining time they have together she can't help but wonder if she was ever really there enough for Eraline, and can't help but feel like she never was.
As Eraline takes her final breaths, Dinah silently breaks down - on many, many levels. "I love you. I love you." After her dear friend passes away, Dinah remains at her final resting place with her and closes her eyes with visions of their times together, from the very first moment she met Eraline as a scrawny fawn the day Evania gave birth to her own, to the countless spars, training, and attempts to mold Era into a fierce fighting machine, to the hardships they both experienced with toxicity, to all of the dances and especially the rain dance, to determined flight training, to the day she watched her play for the first time with Idelle, to every single laugh.
Even though I'm not in-forest yet, I'm going to go ahead and respond to this. It has been a pleasure playing with you and getting to know Dinah. I will be on MSN every once in a while and you still have my email, I think. Don't hesitate to hit me up. We live in the same city after all. <3
--
There is little she can do now to stop the world from spinning, from fading in and out of color. She hadn't expected for death to take this long, to be so slow and draining; but it is, has been, and now she is riding on the edge of forever and the dream she has been watching play out in front of her eyes for months now. Somewhere in the middle too is Dinah. Dinah with her fur the color of Heaven's palms and Dinah with her temper, with her ferocity; Dinah with her fierce loyalty and that tenderness to remind all who know her that somewhere beneath that harsh exterior is someone waiting to be loved and cherished. Someone underrated, but beautiful. That is something Eraline has always known. She had loved her once in another way, in a strange an inappropriate way, but then she'd been just a fawn and the distinction between family and love had been fragile and confusing. She blinks through a wall of involuntary tears, watching the doe near with that look on her face that tells her everything she has to know without needing to hear it - not that she can, not really; there are bees in her brain, buzzing buzzing buzzing sweetly in her ears. She swallows through the pain, glad she can't form complete sentences anymore, because how could she ever explain loving Dinah and yet still wanting this, wanting to wake up from this dream.
She shifts her cheek upon the earth, reaching, until her cheek is touching the doe's knee. It is the most she can do with what little energy she has left. To feel her, to smell her one more time, this fierce warrior of a mother that is one-fifth of the entire array of females who raised her. Touching her, she lifts her tired eyes and manages, simply, "Love...yo.."
I've been debating on what to say here for a while x___x it's going to be a shame to see her go.. my deer and I admired her from afar silently. Like everyone else has said, we're definitely going to miss her.
I wish her, and you, the best in life and whenever you go from here. ♥
"E-Eraline?! Don't go.. please.. please don't go.. I love you.. You can't die.."
"It's okay to let go if the pain is too much, Eraline." The massive doe swallowed the lump in her throat and pressed her skull against the face of the doe she had grown so fond of. Emotions raged through her, but there was nothing she could do now except try and ease Eraline's mind, if she wasn't already at peace with the world. Another choked sob. "I love you.. We love you. Be at ease, and may the gods take you someplace beautiful.. You deserve no less."
She is dozing - vaguely, more
She remembers watching him during that strange and violent season - the season she met Bishop. He'd been fighting off another stag for the attentions of a very pretty doe, and her father beside her had sat, as enraptured as she to bask in his masculine glory. He is exactly the kind of male she would want to knock down a few pegs were he anything but family. Now he is sitting beside her, little space between them, and he is young and somehow still her grandfather.
"N-no...don't apologize." She says after a moment, embarrassed by the quiver in her voice and her probably more than a little apparent nervousness in his presence. She furrows her brows, confused for a moment as if she has forgotten she is injured at all. Then she breathes in and a sharp pain shoots up her side. That's right. "Ah...yeah, I guess. It's...from a lot of things." The doe turns away briefly to worry at the waters beneath her. The chill helps to numb the pain. "I've been doing a lot of stupid things lately. Just a little banged up from today is all."
A frown appeared on his mouth
For a second, Mateo looked away to let his eyes look over their surroundings, how peaceful this forest could be in little moments like this. But it was deceptive, the calm could be shattered in an instant with just a word or even the wrong look. It was never safe despite the beauty it could hold.
His attention returned to Eraline as an idea formed in his mind. His brows furrowed, "I know we don't see eachother often, but you are family to me and family is everything. I..I've been thinking of going on a trip somewhere, not for long and not too far but enough to get a bit of fresh air." his ears fell back as he paused with brief hesitance. "And just...Well, if you feel like maybe you need to get away too, you're more than welcome to come along." He gave a small shrug then and looked else where again, "It's just an offer, you don't need to make any hasty decisions now especially after the day you've had. But at least its something to consider."
adorable art by Tuoho! ♥
Eraline cannot help the small
"You mean...outside of the forest?" The idea is so foreign to her that it makes her head heavy with possibility. The night before, her father had misunderstood her and assumed she'd planned to leave the forest. It is not the first time she has had to think about what might be outside, but it is the first time outside has ever felt real. Real enough to apply to her. "There's stuff out there? Stuff to see?"
The doe falls silent then as she considers this. What might it feel like to be the one leaving for once? What might it be like? What kinds of creatures would she meet? Most importantly, would it make her feel better? Would it make breathing feel less like a chore? By the time she thinks to look up at her grandfather again her eyes are shining with a wall of tears; overwhelmed by the idea of an escape, no matter how shortlived, the moisture dances on the rims of her vision. "I have a friend..." she starts, unsure of what she is saying but needing to ask, "who told me about this thing called a 'chariot.' It is some kind of contraption, he says, that makes you go really fast. Do you think...if we went out there, we could find one?"
She asks this and then her face grows hot, the silliness of the question almost too much to bear. She shakes her head and a few tears slip out from the corners of her eyes as she does so, mats the fur on her face. She offers him a soft smile when she opens them again and nods after a moment. "I...I want to go. With you. I want to see."
"There are a lot of things to
Mateo's ears fell back and he returned her smile, seeing her tears made him want to shed some as well. The sight clutched at his heart; was she truly in much more pain than he thought? If so, he felt like he could be useful now, to give her some relief from the heavy burdens she might be carrying. It was all that he could do. He laughs at her question not because it was silly or dumb, but perhaps sweet. "A chariot, huh? I don't think I've seen one but we'll definitely look." he told her with a reassuring nod. "You should rest now, you'll need it."
adorable art by Tuoho! ♥
"You do not look well,
"I'm...fine Levi. Eating and
"I understand completely,
It is a moment before Eraline
"I am about as stable as a
The doe dives into
The doe shied slightly at the
Forgot to track this. How
I thought I had this tracked.
"D-don't you worry a-about
Eraline grins softly but does
She rests her head to the
The doe nods, smiling a bit
Her smile was contagious, she
definitely have to ~!track
"Eraline?" The ginger doe
---
I hope you don't mind me springing this on you!
Oh I don't mind at all! But
Thats absaloutely fine~
Eraline is dozing in and out
Nodding slowly, the doe
"No...no. I'll be fine and it
Watching her and Ciel tonight
Should have track this ages ago <3 she is gorgeous ♥
*crawls in* *stealthily
still can't believe i forgot ajsdhsfgj ;-----;
Thank you both, and welcome!
-snugglesin-
..no. .......no way.
.......no way.
D8
Levi and I both love her. She
I fully realize and
Eraline was a well realized and developed character, you played her well and it was a pleasure to see her grow through the months.
It was a not so secret, secret that Herla hoped Eraline would eventually become her daughter-in-law.
Eraline will be greatly missed.
Whaaat? This is going to
Oh lord, I really wasn't
;c;
Wow, I had no idea Eraline
Just to be clear. It is just Eraline dying? You as the player will still be around after her death?
I know this is going to be
That is really sad to hear..
Thank you for explaining.
ohmy...she's dying?
Im so sorry to hear that she
And I totally understand why. Anyway keeping track on the exact time.
We'll miss her a lot, even
"Goodbye, mama."
"Goodbye, mama."
"Goodbye, Little Fighter. You
Trae - your little boy has always been a pure light in Eraline's life. He became her son from the night he stayed with her in the birch. I wish they could have seen each other more. Leaving him, especially after seeing him tonight, is going to hurt her bad. But she loves him and will always love him.
I wish you all the best. You
School comes first. Good for
_________________________________
In moments like this, she becomes most aware of how cruel life can be. Her eyes swell up when she sees her dying friend, but she doesn't cry now. Her heart sinks into her stomach, but she stays strong for Eraline - she would only expect the young doe to do the same for her, and to be a pillar of love that Eraline has been for everybody else. "I'm here, Era." Her voice is steady yet tender as a single goddamned tear escapes before she shakes it off of her face, before anybody can see. "I'm not going anywhere." she quietly whispers as she takes a seat next to her friend, and within the remaining time they have together she can't help but wonder if she was ever really there enough for Eraline, and can't help but feel like she never was.
As Eraline takes her final breaths, Dinah silently breaks down - on many, many levels.
"I love you. I love you." After her dear friend passes away, Dinah remains at her final resting place with her and closes her eyes with visions of their times together, from the very first moment she met Eraline as a scrawny fawn the day Evania gave birth to her own, to the countless spars, training, and attempts to mold Era into a fierce fighting machine, to the hardships they both experienced with toxicity, to all of the dances and especially the rain dance, to determined flight training, to the day she watched her play for the first time with Idelle, to every single laugh.
R.I.P. Eraline <3
Even though I'm not in-forest
--
There is little she can do now to stop the world from spinning, from fading in and out of color. She hadn't expected for death to take this long, to be so slow and draining; but it is, has been, and now she is riding on the edge of forever and the dream she has been watching play out in front of her eyes for months now. Somewhere in the middle too is Dinah. Dinah with her fur the color of Heaven's palms and Dinah with her temper, with her ferocity; Dinah with her fierce loyalty and that tenderness to remind all who know her that somewhere beneath that harsh exterior is someone waiting to be loved and cherished. Someone underrated, but beautiful. That is something Eraline has always known. She had loved her once in another way, in a strange an inappropriate way, but then she'd been just a fawn and the distinction between family and love had been fragile and confusing. She blinks through a wall of involuntary tears, watching the doe near with that look on her face that tells her everything she has to know without needing to hear it - not that she can, not really; there are bees in her brain, buzzing buzzing buzzing sweetly in her ears. She swallows through the pain, glad she can't form complete sentences anymore, because how could she ever explain loving Dinah and yet still wanting this, wanting to wake up from this dream.
She shifts her cheek upon the earth, reaching, until her cheek is touching the doe's knee. It is the most she can do with what little energy she has left. To feel her, to smell her one more time, this fierce warrior of a mother that is one-fifth of the entire array of females who raised her. Touching her, she lifts her tired eyes and manages, simply, "Love...yo.."
You already know my feelings
I've been debating on what to
I wish her, and you, the best in life and whenever you go from here. ♥
"E-Eraline?! Don't go..
"It's okay to let go if the pain is too much, Eraline." The massive doe swallowed the lump in her throat and pressed her skull against the face of the doe she had grown so fond of. Emotions raged through her, but there was nothing she could do now except try and ease Eraline's mind, if she wasn't already at peace with the world. Another choked sob. "I love you.. We love you. Be at ease, and may the gods take you someplace beautiful.. You deserve no less."