Bed of the forest

Silkrabbit's picture
Clammy green carpet, among wooden giants' feet.
Bed of the forest under dancing red leaves.

A tickle on my lids, from a golden fount of light,
flowing like river through the pitch black night.

And when I looked up high, up to granny oak's crown,
I saw a cage for the bird songs and a new born dawn.


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My very first little poem, I did in english, so please have mercy on me.
I'm still new in the forest and absolutely fascinated! The proof, that even games can be art.
If I did a grammatic mistake, feel free to correct me. I'm still learning. Smiling
Apoidea's picture

Beautiful and

Beautiful and masterful!



The only issue in the whole thing that I found are your lack of apostrophes.

giants' (because giants is plural the apostrophe goes after the s to show the possession of many i.e. many feet possessed by many giants)
oak's (before the s because it is a single possessor i.e. the single oak possesses the crown)



I'm excited to read much more of your writing as it is most definitely colorful, detailed, and your word choices are wonderful!


Welcome to the forest and the community!
Silkrabbit's picture

Thank you very much, I'm

Thank you very much, I'm glad, you liked it.

Yes, these apostrophes are quite a weakness of mine, good thing, you mentioned that. Eye
It should be corrected now (hope, I got it right).

Nice, to be in the forest.
Pippaloo's picture

Wow! So, just, wow. To me you

Wow! So, just, wow. To me you did a great job! I like how it's a couplet, my favorite form of poems.
Love the world,
and the world loves you,
and this my friend, is true.