Ahh Autumn... A beautiful season. The tempurature is just right, and the leaves turn to the colors of my coat. It seems not too long ago that it was that Autumn, the Autumn where I first met her... Well, it wasn't really Autumn, but it was close. She seemed so small back then... Just a small fawn, no more than four days older than me. We were so happy, so innocent. Nothing seemed to matter to us.

I guess it was then that it all went downhill. I didn't want to see her, though she was looking furiously for me. And I mean furiously. She was angry. Of course, I didn't know that. But soon, we met again. I wish it were under better circumstances. But... I suppose it was for the better. Had I not been on the verge of death, she wouldn't have stuck by me for so long. And I never would have felt this way about her like I do now...

Fenqua... She is the only one... No other doe I know could have been so kind... No other doe could have been so right... I could not feel this way about any other doe. A doe like you. I love you...

***

Autumn. It is... slightly irritating. I grow comfortable with the heat of summer, and then it suddenly drops once again. The fogs role in, the leaves turn. It seems to be a welcome for me. For us. Just not too long ago, I found my other. Of course, wouldn't be more appropriate for it to be Spring? Ahh, how the year teases us. The dreary weather of Autumn just makes it feel wrong. Perhaps it is the season turning for him. The one who lost. He deserves the turning of the leaves. His heart has been torn. His heart has fallen, so much like the leaves.

If it were under better circumstances, it would be Spring. No one would have been hurt. Everything would have worked. But in all honesty, I think this has gone fairly well. It could have been much worse. And so I welcome Autumn. I welcome it next to you.

Winter will not be as cold this year.

***

*giggle* I love Autumn. The temperture is just right, and I'm next to the best stag on earth. But, you know, I wouldn't mind for it to be all perfect. There's still some tension in the air. I saw him not too long ago. I was with Zilant. I almost bolted away, I was so afraid of what he might have done. But they got along fine, I suppose. I'm glad most of the pain has left.

I suppose we just weren't right for each other. And we've both met our better halves. But I can't help but wonder what it would be like living with him instead. If the black and white doe had never had those feelings in the first place. If I could've stayed with him. It would certainly be different. And... that makes me sad. I've seen so much meeting Zilant. But I've also seen so much with him. He was the first to show me love, but it was just torn. Like a snowflake in the fire. I was angry, he was angry. Somehow it was resolved. But it's not all gone...

I hope we can become friends once more... Without all the tension. Where we can comfortably visit you and her. As friends. As family. With no worries.

Maybe Spring will clear all of it up...

***

Autumn.... Nothing but memories in this season, for me at least. Memories of my dear love, and my little flower... Memories of my herd, my friends, my family. And memories of those wolves.

I see the giant deer. He brings fog, and with that, wolves howl. I hate hearing that dreadful noise. It makes me angry, and I feel the weight of my antlers become larger! As if they weren't heavy enough! It's as if those antlers are supposed to be weighing down my anger. But I can't help it! They were the ones who took my life away, they are the ones I punished! They murdered my love and child. They caused me great pain. But I have brought it upon myself... For one murder does not deserve another, according to us. We are the peaceful kind, one of intelligence and understanding, not of violence.

Had that Green Leaf never come, I would not have ended up here. It's hard enough to fit in around here... I look so strange to them. I have only made friends with too young ones, and they seem more interested in each other than me. Oh well, I suppose it's alright. The fawns seem to like me. It reminds me of my little one when I play with them. There's something I can take pleasure in, at least...

At least Autumn doesn't last so long here...

***

Autumn? Hate it! It's cold, it's rainy, and the leaves are ugly! Well, except the red ones. But I don't understand, why can't leaves be blue or purple? Why all these oranges and yellows and reds? And browns, bleh! It's makes it look like the forest is on fire. And then the ground gets littered with all those leaves! And then it rains and all those leaves get stuck to your hooves!

Humph. I could do without Autumn. Or Winter. Spring and Summer are my seasons! All full of life and energy. Full of perfect days to run around! Have you ever tried to run in snow or wet leaves? It's impossible, especially for me! Bah, makes no sense to me...

*calms down* But I suppose without Autumn or Winter we wouldn't know cold, and we wouldn't be prepared for anything like drought or famine. Since food seems to be so scarce in the later year. We wouldn't know what to do. It gives us a sharp mind and a good know-how of surviving in harsh times. That makes a lot more sense to me. When you think of how it effects the entire land, instead of just you, everything seems to make more sense.

Heh, oh well. Better enjoy the warmth while it lasts and take a quick run! *sprints*

***

Ahh, Autumn. I remember Autumn. It's especially beautiful in Greece, surrounding all those older buildings. Of course humans won't really let you near those buildings, but what will you do about that? That's where their gods are, I suppose. And it's quite lovely in Rome as well. There is no Autumn in Egypt, unfortunately. I suppose they don't need it. Ahh, but in Babylon? Marvelous! I've seen Autumn in many places, but this is my first in the Endless Forest.

I remember Mother telling me of Autumn, and how it effects nature. How it's important. She always loves Autumn, because of the colors. Her golden pelt always seemed to shine in that season. And then I remember Father always complaining about it. There's not enough food, it's too cold, I think there's a rebellion rising. Oh wait, that wasn't about Autumn...

Bah, Father. Always worried about the tiniest thing. If he had a speck of decency and sanity in his mind, which I doubt, he wouldn't worry as much. But no, all parties and peaches for him. I can't admit living with him wasn't fun, but it's something I would probably want to change... Mother didn't like what he became. And now that I think about it, neither would I. Had I been older and wiser, I would have forgotten about him and just stayed with her. No, curiousity got the better of me. Now I don't think I can think straight anymore.

I ramble. Yes, Autumn, loved by some, hated by others. In my standards... I don't care. All it brings back is wonderful memories of the beautiful scenery of the many places I've visited. This Autumn seems to be the most beautiful... If that's a sign...

***

What's Autumn, Papa? Why do people talk so much about it? You must've seen a lot of Autumns! Papa, the leaves look like you! Can I look like leaves too? *pauses* Has Mama seen Autumn too? Some of the leaves look like her too! I wish I knew what Autumn was...

It's getting colder, Papa. Is it always this cold? Will it ever warm up? I always have to cuddle extra close to Mama to stay warm. I don't like the cold. I don't think Mama does either. Do you Mama? Do you Papa? Some day I'll be like you, and I'll look like leaves too, and maybe the cold won't bother me as much.

Mama, do you know what Autumn is? I want to know, so when I see it again, I'll know. Can you see it? Is it something you see? Is it something you hear? Oh, I wish I knew! Mama, will you and Papa tell me soon? Oh, and tell Bubble too, I don't think he knows either. *giggles* I know I'll find out before he does!

Hey, Bubble, I'm gonna know what Autumn is before you!

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PHEW. thoughts of all my deer.

if you dont know, the last one is Faytha, Skokey and Fenqua's daughter. she calls her twin brother Bubble. I dunno, something I just made up XD i think Faytha deserves a little thought of her own, don't you think?