The community and the Forest, have changed so much since I was here for the last time. D8
New stuff in the Forest game? Completely re-designed community (still no display names, though -__-)? ...Slight drama stuff going on here? Shimmy gone? So many new members? It ... it is quite too much for me...
However, I moved and didn't have much time for any computer stuff, so I ask for forgiveness.
MSN too doesn't work for me yet, not really. The TEF game neither.

I've been here for one year now. Cheers?

.
.
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AND OF COURSE. A mega huge "Happy Belated Birthday!" to my darlings Misako, Sunfyra and Flyra (and anyone else? These three's birthdays were the only one I could remember...). I am too sorry for missing it, guys.
But I thought of you at your birthday days, I swear. ;__;
<3333

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Sometimes ... sometimes I wish that everyone would see as I do.
.[
I've never experienced the other sight, but I do know about it.
.
Material Seeing is like watching a façade, it may tell you about the inside, it may not.
.
Mind Seeing is like looking directly into the inside.

.
Which of course never means that you can understand it immediately.
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You need to learn to comprehend.
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Would you take a closer look if you didn't like what you see,
.
because they taught you it's not like you should be?

.
Perhaps it was wrong listening to them.
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Everyone bares a deeper self, which even my eyes won't ever recognize.
.
If I've learned something in this 'endless' forest, that's what.
.
Let me think about it again, is it right?

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You won't ever know. There are others, so much better than me.
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Don't forget your visions about light and white.
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There can be other ways to be happy.
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But is there a way away from sadness

.
if it shows that it's true what I'm already assuming?
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One could say it was never meant to be.
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I am not meant to be here. My home's far away.
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Homes can change. This is my new home.
.

Will she ever understand to see like me?

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I can feel the loss, stronger than ever.
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It's not supposed to be there,
.
is it?
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Everyone will loose someone someday.

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But it feels so wrong...
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I miss them all so much.
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It's my biggest wish for them to return.
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But it seems like it's difficult for wishes to become true.

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It's not like I deserve it.
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No, actually not. I never did anything but being comforted,
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by my dad, by my friends. I have no rights to be sad,
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it's not fair.

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Everyone feels jolly rotten someday.
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I could show some strength by fighting these feelings down.
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Good morning, what's up with you?
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Oh, I? I'm doing fine, it's no big problem.

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The more I think about it, the more unreal it gets.
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Did it actually happen?
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Luck will come with happiness.
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My mother wouldn't want me to cry.
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I cannot lie to myself forever.

.

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Don't you love me anymore?
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I ... I admit, that's a new experience. This may sound selfish.
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But what isn't new is the loosing.
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I'm loosing my love, again.

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Is this what I get for being a bad leader in the past?
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Is this what I get for ... for leaving my friends for such a long while?
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I know, I've done something wrong.
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I shouldn't have been gone for so long.

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I wish I could turn things back, change things,
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but who doesn't?
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Too much 'I' in these sentences.
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Maybe it's just me acting up.

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Perhaps it's just another phase I must go through.
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It's okay, then. Life isn't happybubblebouncy, everyone should know that.
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It's just another important experience.
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I should be there for others, those who need me.

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I have abandoned them for long enough.
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If you may, allow me to have a walk with you again?
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Excuse me for being that selfish,
.
for staying away that long.
.

Excuse me.

_{I noticed the story is in this part rather based on conversations. I hope this still has the effect I'm wishing for it to have... so people, please tell me what you think... <3
Myself is feeling rather down these days, I hope this won't influence the story since I'm still writing it...
Okay, I notice this is getting into random babblings where actually should be "story invitations", so I'll stop this and just say, enjoy reading if you wish to read it.}





« It’s true what you said. »

He looks as if he’s sick over his own words.

« How the freaking hell did you know? »
« It was so clear. »
« It definitely wasn’t! Nobody believed me when I told them. But then… then… »

Toji’s voice breaks.

« Well, me and some others of the younger bucks went searching around Ram’s sleeping spot and there we found… we found… »
« …the bones. »
« Yes! »

He stares at me.

« It was exactly as you told me. He confessed when we showed him the evidence. Our leader hunted him away. Ram was a pity for our herd, he said. »

I laugh.

« What’s so funny? »
« Naïve deer. »
« The leader?! »
« Yes. »
« Is it… is it true that he’s your father? »
« Yes. »
« And then you call him naïve? »
« Well, he is. »



He is here.
My naïve father came to the place he abandoned me at.
I thought you hated this place, my dear, beloved father?

« H…how did you know?! »
« What do you mean, Sir de Broix? »

_{So yeah, this is part no. 2! The awesome comments on part 1 really made me wanting to continue this. Thanks guys! I hope you'll enjoy the ongoing story as well. ;] Have fun! <3
Oh and yes: Do not wonder about what Monde says about deaths in fire. It's true; you need a really hot fire to also burn the bones, and a normal forest fire cannot do it. At least I've read it like that, lol.
And yes, Monde is growing to get weird abilities which are actually normal for her but... ah, enough previous babbling. Let's move to the story now!}





A boy is coming. Not much older than me.

« Are you a fairy deer? You have a funny face. »

I ignore him. What a silly head.

« Do you live here? »
« Yes. What do you think? »
« That you live in the herd. »

I look at him. Brown eyes.

« You have beautiful green eyes. »
« … »
« Don’t you want to talk with me? »
« … »
« Are you afraid of me? »
« Absolutely not. You bore me. »



He comes again, brings me food, tells me stories about the world.
I learn. I learn about the world.

« What is your name? »
« Dia Monde. »
« Dia…mond? »
« Dia Monde, can’t you hear this properly? »
« But… Monde means ‘world’, doesn’t it? In another language. »
« Very clever. »

I am listening, listening to the animals around me, their stories. Listening to the stones, their stories.

« Don’t you want to know my name? »

I don’t listen to him. The stories are more interesting.

« My name is Toji. »

Sorry for bumping, but... it feels bad when there doesn't seem to be anybody who reads it...

_{Okay so. This is my "new" deer, Monde. I am currently writing about her past, but all this has become so long that I decided to cut it in multiple parts. Her story is a bit weird, and she remembers only a few fragments of it. So this will be told by her, as she thinks about all what happened before she came to TEF. Which has a strange background... but, read it yourself, if you wish.
Random info if some of you don't know: I read somewhere that "hawkshaw" is an American english word for detective. And this word just fits too well into my Shawnee deer concept, huh? And why detective? You'll realize it during the story!
So this is part 1! More to come soonly.}

Another of Paya's days in the Forest.
Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Of the day when I met my daddy Cata.


Dancing with this cute little fawn - and the leaf.


GROUP DANCING.


I wonder how this was possible?


You must admit: it DOES look like that. ;D


Yay!


Just another usual pose.


Bows and...

...laughs.


Teaching fawns random stuff.





I 'unno. |D


PICTO THIEF.
Translation of our convo there:
Me: Wtf?
Him: Yaysa, I have your picto.
Me: Heeey, it's mine.
Him: You are not angry, aren't you.
Me: I just don't feel unique anymore.
Him: This feeling will pass by.


Hmmm. I guess it was Io Rez.

Hey,
I finally got MSN too!
And I'd really love to get some of you guys to talk to, so please feel free to add me:
shadeshaw@hotmail.com ! x]
I think that would also be a nice way of getting to know you guys better,... so please add me! 8]
See you around, then! <3

Cata

Haha. Yeah, I'll maybe be making a new deer charry. Because I feel like ;D Buuuuuut I need opinions, because I am not sure about it... It's just that thing that I love creating characters, and TEF inspired me so much for making some! And since I am deciding to take everything out of my Shawnee idea with making a story for my deer's past, I want to do something else. I already have a few ideas, but, like I said, I need opinions!
Let's make those like a poll, I'd love to have many people of you even those who don't know me to vote, please, kay, thanks! ^^

#1 Firstly, do you think I should do one?

• a) Yes


• b) No

Haha, this was a simple one. Well, if you decide for "Yes",

#2 I'd like to know which one because I've got multiple ideas.

• a) Another Shawnee deer - not so much my fave like I told you, but it would probably be an enemy of Cata's old herd to make it interesting. x]


• b) A Hobbit deer. Yes I'm a LOTR-fan and for some reason this idea got into my head. <8D "It" (not sure about the gender yet) would be a mini deer all the time and speak in an antiquated language (not sure about that yet since I don't know much about the English antiquated language ;D), aaaaand "it"'ll be all confused about finding "it"self in an Endless Forest since it has just lived in Middle-earth actually. Oh, and "it" LOOOOVES mushrooms. xD


• c) An actual human who finds "it"self (again not sure about the gender) as a deer in TEF one wonderful day! Has anyone used this idea before? Because I find this really interesting.


• d) A spirit! I'd play "it" in Phase #2 so "it"'d be almost invisible. I'd maybe ask someone to send me the SpellData for some parts of the DOTD or zombie set for it (are those even visible in Phase 2?) because that would just fit better, but that isn't necessary! I haven't worked at this idea any further, but I like it!


• e) Anything else... (ideas?)