Diary Entry | The Endless Forest

Diary Entry

These Strange Feelings (Amary)

September 13, 2009 - 8:28am — Siellby

[=#9966cc]I haven't seen Bastilion in a while. I really wish he was around more often.
My feelings still confuse me. I have friends I've known longer, and some that I haven't seen in an even longer length of time... But I think about him the most.

When I woke up today, Steele was beside me. I greeted him. I haven't seen him in a while, either. But when I sensed Bastilion, I nearly forgot about Steele. I ran to greet Bastilion. He was by the ruins, with Darkweaver. Seeing Bastilion, I felt really happy. I wanted jump, to leap. But why? Why do I feel differently around him than I do with my other friends?

I was shocked when Darkweaver suddenly turned into a fawn. He seemed frightened. So I stood by him. But, Rev was there, too, and I still felt like I wanted to watch over him. I did, a little bit, but I was glad when Saosin arrived to be with him, allowing me to go back to Bast and Darkweaver without feeling guilty.

The crowd near the ruins got to be a bit too much. It seemed to bother Dark, even myself a little bit. I guess I'm still not quite over the melancholy I had been feeling before, as normally I enjoy being with large groups. So, I asked the others to follow me, deciding to go somewhere less crowded. I headed to the birch forest, as there usually aren't a lot of deer there.

We sat for a while. I felt compelled to move closer to Bastilion. I leaned against him. He felt so soft, and warm, and there was something...almost soothing...about the feeling of his side rising and falling with his breath.

Then, Darkweaver returned to his usual size and left. I was confused, but soon Bast lay down again and I went back to laying against him. I...I felt like I could stay there forever... There is just something...reassuring...about his presence. And...safe. And more than that... I just feel...happier. It was if everything that had happened recently simply dissolved away.

Diary Entry

Death and Life (Amary)

September 12, 2009 - 11:37am — Siellby

[=#9966cc]There have been so many deaths lately, it seems...
Tyerk...When? How? Why didn't I hear about it sooner? Why did no one tell me? Though I feel sad about every death I hear of, this is the first time it's been someone I actually knew.

I didn't know him very well, but I always liked him, and I hoped we could be friends. I'm certain we could have, with a little more time.

I remember that time in the playground... Thinking about it now brings tears... We were having fun. We played at "deer stacking". It didn't last long, but I enjoyed myself.

And now I can't believe he's gone... And, it's been a while, it seems. And I never knew about it. I had noticed I hadn't seen him around. But I didn't realize...

Then there's the stag that was called, I think, Wesker... I never met him. I may have seen him, but I'm not sure. They say...Darkweaver is...responsible... I didn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. But now...I know... And it has me very confused. I have seen Darkweaver fight others...in fact, now that I think of it, I think I have seen him fight Wesker... But I never thought... I understand why, but I think there could have been another way. Or, maybe that's just a desperate wish... Even the Priest said sometimes there is no other way. I'm just so confused... I can't be mad at Darkweaver, or disappointed, but I am saddened. I don't know what to think of all this.

Why these things have to happen, why anyone has to die, I will never understand. I used to think this place was a paradise...death isn't supposed to happen here. But, now I know better. In a paradise, there would be no fighting, no death, everyone would be happy. I only wish everyone could be happy. I wish I could help everyone, that I could make everyone happy. Once I thought I could, but now I realize it is impossible.

Or is it? Maybe there is still a way. I can't lose hope...

Diary Entry

~Riddle me T H A T A R E S I L E N C E D

September 11, 2009 - 11:52pm — shimmyshimmy

Diary Entry

What a Day (Oisín)

September 9, 2009 - 12:17pm — Siellby

[=#993333]I find myself with a mother and a father. A family... A familiar feeling. I know I once had a family, before. Something...happened to them...I believe... It feels good to have one again.

Master Scape... Or, I should say, Father... I want to thank you for being there for me when I was new to this world, for teaching me, protecting me, while I struggled to make sense of everything around me. If not for you, I would still be afraid... Well, I admit my fears are not yet gone, but they are diminished. I even enjoy things now that I once feared. Also, I thank you for your patience, knowing it must not be easy for one with so much energy to wait for a fawn with a bad leg. You also showed me how to have fun.

And, of course, I cannot forget the one I now call Mother. Even yesterday, you comforted me. You helped me forget my worries.
Though I was not born in this forest, I could not have asked for better parents.

Although...some of this feels familiar... Clearly I have been influenced by those that taught me, but I think that there is more to it... It might have something to do with the feeling I have always had that I once lived elsewhere, even to adulthood, which would mean that I have essentially grown up twice, in which case I must have learned things the first time around as well. It is a strange thing to think of... I have heard of others having had past lives. Maybe it is the same for me.