...I thought this was one of my better poems :/ But only one comment...;-;

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The silver dewdrops stream
Across the bottom of my laken eyes
As every passing wind is a nightmare
And the chills fell the teardrops;;
Sullen and heavy is my heart
With the softness of a dying angel
Lying atop it in an ache of sadness
For all is gone and I am guilty
In the aging war, depression

With a beat and a flutter
Doth the dewy drip-drop ascend to the heavens
Carried eternally and disallowed
To even query at a raindrop's destiny
Trapped forever in a grin, ne'r a rainbow
Only the pained, rippling reflection in a frozen pond
With mind and soul crippled by blissful
And a kiss full of anger and snaps of twigs
Where at the lightest tap doth she fall into the depths
Of the rueful rage and the anger caged
Until she rises up again to follies
She is I, forever I

Rage, beating down upon the innocents
And those who tried to put out the flame
Whose wick is oil and flame is spontane'us
And fangs will draw the bloods;;
I feast upon the flesh of my own
For I cannot let the rage escape but in small gasps
For I shall claw and rip and growl
In a hushed anger that is hushed to hide
The burning, the anger, seeping inside
Forever more, and ever more

Sinking forever into nothingness
I cannot describe, I cannot word
Within this, I am trapped
Forgotten and floating forever within
This emptiness, nei'er sad nor holding
The brightest joys;; no, simply empty
The gone, the nothingness of life
It feels as though I've floated away
For an eternity or more
I stand here and stand

A little bit cocky with a sly, creepy grin
Doth the happiness invade and begins to peruse
And so she does, in creativity
Where dewblood drips from fingertip pricks
Until the sudden fatal blow and she falls down
Down in a spiral into the depression of unknown origins
Within a minute or less, she hath completed
And in time, she speeds back up
And runs back high, to the high of the sky
And imagination runs wilder still
Such trickery, such deceit
Forever am I this

Normality of sanity
How I desire capture ye
For only doth thee lurk when all
The fakes and players come to play
Hormonal beasts that do not ache
Within the chest like all the others
Beating me down within alone
Not as the ache behind my sternum;; so
I inquire, fae, may I be 'llowed
To be normal without your scowls
To be allowed to know normal
Or am I cursed forever more?...

Sanity is a rarity
Like a priceless gem, I have forgotten it
It is rare that I can place it
The soft fur that pets my skin with softness
All my life feeds upon it and I feel myself
The ache is gone, I've caught and dragged
Myself to norm with normal moods
And dewdrops will not rise, condense
I am me, or am I so?
I cannot know
I cannot grow out of these moods that plague me
In their eternal dance around my sternum
Their eternal dance around my sternal cortex

Happy, sad
Or joy, anger?
Triggers pulled and gunshots shoot
The water cannot stay in place
With aches and pains here and there
Keeping me awake for an eternity
Or sending me asleep early
I cannot seem to free myself
From this eternity of self
Normality
Come take me
For without you
I'm afraid of losing my sanity.

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I was listening to music while writing, so it is in its purest form. It may not make much sense. I just tried to write out my main moods and issues in poetry. Oh, and the "emptiness", it's not when I'm just not moody, it's another state...if you've been there, you get it x.o

I'm such a moody witch, lol...:/ And now that I'm PMSing, my normal moods seem to have retreated, leaving me with PMSing moods. Depressing, really...

I think I was myself earlier, lol...I was a smarta**, a bit creative, didn't like to concentrate but could if I needed to...I dunno. I made sense when I spoke, my moods were entirely my own...I felt in control. But on the bus ride home, I had a mood swing, lol, just PMS...

I don't really know who I am anymore...*sighs*...

I've been like this for a few years now. But until I've started keeping a blog of my moods, I didn't realize just how much my moods, and how intense (or bland) they could be...

I loathe the current me, lol...I don't blame others who do as well. I know there are multiple, and they know who they are :/...