I'm sorry... I just need to get this out.

I have a good friend. He's the same age (almost, but same grade anyhow) and we didn't become friends through school, but through a music class (which we took together for 6 years or so... I miss that class). We both wanted to continue that class this year for grade 9 but we knew things would be getting way too busy in school.

I go to a minischool, he goes to another school. What's kind of ironic is that his school is about 2 blocks away from where I live. He would say last year that he passes by my place every morning. But we'd never see each other because I need to leave earlier and I come back later.

And, well... I haven't seen him since the end of the school year, before the summer. And I miss him so much. I guess I like him.
I was thinking about him the other day, and I realised I couldn't remember his face clearly anymore.

We have email, but he often doesn't reply.

He's not at all like the boys his age usually are (at my school anyway). He does very well in school, he's kind of short like me, he isn't loud/rowdy/the type to push people against lockers. He's half Japanese like me. He's very funny. He's so so nice. But I think he lies to choose the safe path, to be nice. You might ask him which one he wants from two types of food and he'll say he doesn't mind, whichever. This isn't good... And he likes attention. He dyes part of his hair. Oh geez. He might've changed now but I don't know.

We're only in grade 9. I shouldn't really be thinking about stuff like this... I really don't know anymore. Argh...

Feel free to ignore this, I don't even know what I'm expecting from you all. Support? I really don't know...

I really don't know what he thinks of me... We were always just friends to each other. But Twin Gods, I miss him.

And I'm a bit afraid for him, too. He goes to a highschool that has... a tiny bit of a bad reputation about... drugs and stuff. It's not terrible, but still. I'm afraid of who his friends might be. I really hope... I really hope he can stand up for himself if he's tempted to smoke...