Seed's Poetry Corner: Nuzzletag

Seed's picture
I've been working on this for a while, but I'm still not completely satisfied with it. It pales before its muse, so I'm a little relieved that I need to return to the subject of Nevilly's favorite game more at some point.


You twist your body and dart away
just as I'm returning your nuzzle.
You leave behind your scent of golden grain,
and a bright swirl of leaves surrounds you.

Just to return your nuzzle,
I chase you across the old woods,
bright swirls of leaves surrounding us,
still green as they drift through the air.

I chase you across the old woods,
laughing as I catch you at last.
We're still green as we drift through the woods,
but between us there's something beautiful starting to bloom.

Laughing, I catch you at last,
breathing in your scent of golden grain.
Between us, something beautiful starts to bloom --
and then you twist your body and dart away.

((This was a rather sappy visit to Seed's poetry corner Head to the index for some of his less sappy stuff, and the rest of it, too.))

Rouda's picture

This is beautiful, I like how

This is beautiful, I like how the next chapter starts with the second sentence of the previous chapter. Besides, this is all true, she does that quite a lot.
I really, really loved this one, Seed. Well done<3
Seed's picture

It's part of the form,

It's part of the form, actually: pantoums basically only actually have half the lines they have, in terms of writing things. Thanks ^^

I'm also bumping this up to see if anyone else has an opinion XD
arrowdoe's picture

This is awesome, Seed

This is awesome, Seed <3
You're such an amazing poet! 8D