Name: "The Masquerade"

Alias/Nickname: Masq (pronounced 'mask')

Gender: male ♂

Age: ageless, exiled in mid 30s, has been trapped in the Forest for roughly 13 years

Species: previously human, now in the form of a mythical deer

Set: fan pelt - flowers - monarch, venetian or real deer mask

Body: emaciated, dull and dusty coat peppered with white hairs, overgrown and dreaded mane and tail, decrepit dead poppies amongst antlers, an intricate jester mask of black and gold

Mind: devoid of heart or soul

“I live — but I'm mutilated."
— Simone de Beauvoir



Witcher
"Go with the one who loves you biblically.
The one whose love lifts its head to you
despite its broken neck. Whose body bursts
sixteen arms electric to carry you, gentle
the way old grief is gentle.

Know that your first love will only be the first.
And the second and third and even fourth
will unprepare you for the most important:

The Blessed. The Beast. The Last Love,

which is, of course, the most terrifying kind.
Because which of us wants to go with what can murder us?
Can reveal to us our true heart’s end and its thirty years
spent in poverty?

And you will hear yourself say:

Last Love, I wish to die so I may come back to you
new and never tasted by any other mouth but yours.

Or you will say:

Last Love, I am old, and have spent myself on the courageless,
have wasted too many clocks on less-deserving men,
so I hurl myself at the throne of you and lie humbly at your feet.

Last Love, I once vowed my heart to another. Forgive me.
Last Love, I have let my blind and anxious hands wander into a room
and come out empty. Forgive me.

Last Love, I have cursed the ones you loved before me. Forgive me.
Last Love, I am all that is left. Forgive me.
Last Love, I did not see you coming. Forgive me.

Last Love, every day without you was a life I crawled out of. Amen.
Last Love, you are my Last Love. Amen.
Last Love, I am all that is left. Amen.

I am all that is left.
Amen."

— Rachel McKibbens



“His mind, suddenly impossibly old, floated out of his body and hovered high above him in the air, from where it jabbered it's useless warnings.
It looked down and watched a young man's body walk through the darkness and the driving rain. More than anything else that body wanted to sleep. Sleep and wake up in a different world.”
— Arundhati Roy




Rene
His closest memory upon awakening. Too damaged to realize the extent of his affections for him now or at the time, though very much still loves him deeply. Met him through Veil as one of her adopted sons when he was young. Having always had a fondness for his muted demeanor and mystery, his feelings only grew as he did, and eventually became his sole friend and companion in the Forest. He always had an ability to raise his spirits no matter how atrocious and never turned him away, though he also never experienced the depravity he was capable of. While Sthenelus was the first to awaken his heart, Rene was the only one to know softness and innocence. There was a childlike vulnerability and presence he could draw from him, when no one else was there to see. If not for the evil and suffering that broke his mind, the boy could've been realized at the time as his deepest and truest love.
Ten years later, the only true emotion, true heaviness he can feel is this void left in his heart. Space that Rene once occupied.


Veil
The closest to a mother he has or will ever have had. Her and her sons were his constant companions before and throughout his strife with Sthenelus, though their relationship was by no means left unstrained due to their mutual friendship. She remained a neutral party, and to be in her presence he had to be reminded every time the knowledge that his enemies were no enemies of hers. With time they grew gradually distant as his madness, and her fear, did as well, though he always yearned for her approval and warmth. In the end he could not sweep away the knowledge she had born painful witness to his wickedness, and that it opposed all the goodness that she was. He was unforgivable, and finally fixed to absolve her of the burden he brought.




“No one wants a half-remembered tragedy. You must know the width of the knife and how it ruined you, name the organs it kissed.”
— Olivia Gatwood




Schism/Sthenelus
His first flame and the one who changed him eternally. The first in either life to have earned his connection and stir emotion. Began as a juvenile and playful relationship, instilling a paternal and eventually romantic bond within him, the latter never fully coming to fruition despite his passion. Showed him a genuine kindness and trust in his own way that none before could have earned and himself had believed was unattainable. His devotion proved unrequited, however, though the details are foggy and obscured by a deep and violent hatred today. Sthenelus developed a relationship with another; Allison, to whom his true affection appeared to lie. Over time and observation this birthed an intense despair and jealousy inside, feelings again unfelt in life before, and an uncontrollable obsession that would lead to the disastrous ruin of their bond. His sole desire in life became to impart the same suffering he felt inside upon the other, through violence, blood, and threats of horrors upon those he loved. Ones that were not empty. He became the ever watchful eye, monstrous and unrecognizable. Reduced to little more than a deranged maniac, far worse than anything he could have been before.
With time the damage was irreversible, his always present loneliness became his one permanent companion. He could not do near enough hurt to Sthenelus' kin to match that which was inside. The other would go on to find unconditional love and father scores of children while he himself decayed and was forgotten by the world.


Allison
The icon of Sthenelus' affection. A victim of his delusions and outrage. Harbors an unrelenting hatred, and at the same time, apathy for her. The latter is all that remains these long years later. Once felt a resounding envy for her and a yearning for her torment, now nothing more than emptiness.


Black Knight/Daenerys
Known only under her alias to him (and as the opposite sex), and furthermore as a nuisance and impediment to his revenge. Possibly the worst victim second to Sthenelus of his rage. Has spilled her blood on more than one occasion when she was helpless to defend herself in an attempt to get back at him, and as a punishment for her meddling. Is unaware of her true identity and ultimate relationship with Sthenelus, nor that she is the mother of his children. The information surely would have broken him further had he been awake to see it those years ago.

past.
mad / thief / trickster / jester
cruel / sybarite / sadistic / fiendish
silver-tongue / flirtatious / persuasive / verbose
manipulative / scheming / dishonest / antisocial

once present.
sensitive / emotional / explosive / unstable
possessive / jealous / overbearing / neurotic
meticulous / protective / lively / fun-loving
confused / chaotic / violent / brutal
rancorous / venomous / antagonistic / merciless

now.
broken / fragmented / lethargic / comatose
humiliated / lonely / callous / forgotten
silent / lazy / indifferent / apathetic