Slept heavily, albeit upright all damn day. Joined by both Ross and Thais at some point. inside he screem
Later in the evening, woke to AN ASSORTMENT OF FAWN FRIENDS. Chrome, Jude, Doriankitten, A FAWN WHO DISAPPEARED THE MOMENT I TRIED TO WRITE THIS UPDATE AND MY MEMORY IS SO BAD THAT I CAN'T RECALL WHO THEY WERE, and a nameless fawn, 'bytheseaside' (i see u gurl.)
Waved a MeAty hand and invited her over. And again when she didn't move very far. Then she dID.
Feeling happy, in part thanks to the rune Sweetkoi had given him.
until the fire nation- jk
Was left with only Jude and, WHO WE'LL CALL Sea Glass. But STEINI appeared and put herself by Jude.
Instantly felt demonized and worse, antagonized by the little girl. Stood and, in his garbled speech told her to 'go away'. When given no response but a BRAVE bIRB, raised his paw threateningly and yelled, gO aWAY. except he said ' go'ay '
Also called her 'nean', which meant mEAN. bUT Jude stood between them to avoid anything coming to blows. Didn't want to hurt Jude in the crossfire so, after a while, spat a 'Vide' (fine sigh) and walked away to stand on a hill by the ruins.
Surprised to be followed by Sea Glass, hugged her tearfully and rested his cheek on her head.
12.5.2017
Headed to the pond to try and catch some fish. SO INTO IT that he TOTALLY MISSED CHROME calling him and trying to get his attention. Absorbed in the the horror that he couldn't.. actually catch the fish because his CLAWS WERE GONE. Plapped at his mask and wept for a while but got 'over' it and gorged on some blueberries that made his stomach hurt. AND THEN.
Found Chrome. But they were in a tree.
Couldn't figure out if they were angry scream or silLLYSCREAM but found himself having to hold back laughs while 'Ome slipped out of the tree, then went back in, then screEM then shake his head and just. Easily entertained sigh..
But maybe the poor thing was screaming because the FLOCK OF DEATH BIRDS.
YELLed back and just for fun tried to slap some birds out of the air but eventually they came out and gave him some love. 10/10
(CARACALBBY) Dorian joined them, but some time after Chrome left, Jude joined as well.
also 10/10
Dorian slipped off. Was left with Jude until Steini showed up and pushed herself against him.
Ran off as he usually did until something clicked. Suddenly very tired with being pushed around by the hatchling walked back and tried to shove her away every time she got in his face. Catching the attention of Jude, things only went downhill. Tried to hide behind the boy a few times and refused to give up the spot he was at first (asidefromchromeokchromefoundit) but ultimately, after some screaming and angry tears, walked away.
10.5.2017
Fully recovered from the sedative in his system, has made many an attempt to remove the mask to no avail. Curled up in a heap near the Twins for a while before being found by Reykat. Snuggled up to the beast, aAAND later SWEETKOI WHY DID I TYPE CRESCENT.
But, hours after than skittered away to find the Monochrome fawn who.. has yet to see him at his 'worst'. So Goeorogege feels really comfortable around him. Because he's a 'hide from guilt' sorta kid. PLUS THEY.. seem smarter and braver than him, to Gerge so, safe. S a f e ..
Wrapped his mangled 'hand' around the fawn's shoulders and snugged him real good.
Only moved closer to the nearby Vrath and Elliot when he did, and got some .. some sweet fruit tarts from the stag. Stuffed that in his mouth and murmured what could possibly be discerned as a 'thanks'.
Keeping his paw on Chrome's back near constantly for a sense of security.
eXCEPT when he went closer to the babyvrath.
Didn't trust himself to be that close to them so lingered a bit away.
Wound up settled with Chrome, Lifa and Jude in the end. The last of which seemed afraid of him. Put together that he must have seen his (Bhae's) snap the other night. Remained apologetic and hunched until the other seemed to understand he wouldn't hurt them.
Comfortable, but not without a knot of guilt in his stomach until the other child left.
then all the childs left
9.5.2017
Slipped in and out of a paranoid doze last night, in an unfamiliar place.
This evening, fed a sedative disguised in a wad of meat and quickly fell into a heavy sleep.
Taken back to the forest and placed beneath the playground rock.
Remained unconscious while Rhea left and returned with Ichor, and as the hyena departed a second time, his maker remaining.
Fitted with a mask that served as a muzzle which would only allow him to open his mouth wide enough for small, small prey or strips of meat. Soon after had his claws cut low and his dewclaws severed.
then ichor the asshole left
8.5.2017
Gerge has yet to learn he is not a cement truck
geoeogre needs a vet
Laid sick and pained through the day, into the night. Snapped during the night after having not fed on anything 'living' for so long, launched at the nearest, smallest creature, Rasui.
Chased and attempted to grab the slippery little thing but often lost grip in his panic and wound up tearing at them while Liathe and Fletcher came to their rescue. uNTIL he finally managed to rip a leg off the poor thing and stuff it into his mouth.
Ran away wailing and screaming, both sick with guilt and absolute terror at the others' responses. Briefly fought with Steini in a panic and then just made a break for it.
Chased across the forest by Liathe and Rhea, continuing to shriek and bawl and eventually threw himself into the depths of the pond to escape. Usually a pretty damn adept swimmer but in fear and with a stomach still full of nUtRItIOuS rOcks, felt himself bob below the surface while kicking sore legs out.
Eventually pulled onto shore by Liathe but continued to scream through her conversation with the Hyena who left and returned. Was grabbed by his scruff shortly after- tried to rip at Rhea's face in self defense but was dragged off and through a portal.
Qanat - Today at 10:04 PM
prE WARNING I'M NOT 100% SURE WHAT THE RESULT OF HIM BEING PULLED OUT OF THE FOREST BY NON ARVIS MAGIC IS
Qanat - Today at 10:04 PM
he might just explode like a punched bag of spaghetti
Didn't explode!
But the transition to another world was painful to say the least. Screamed, thrashed and tried to bite at the now-woman in sheer terror which had no time to mellow out since he'd jumped on Rasui. Was ultimately, PRETTY MUCH CHOKED OUT LAKSNDLA while he bit Rhea.
Blacked out and was placed in a.. a pitch black dank basement with a bed in it..
y..
y friends..
ilu gomen
7.5.2017
who likes to play with 6 viewers at once..
qanat do..
Meanwhile Geoeorge has eaten more dirt and rocks.
Self.. cONTROL.
LOVE. nOT fOOD. dIRT IS GOOD FOOD. it'S fINE
5.5.2017
Growing rapidly with each meal, though their mind remains the same.
And today gEOrGE learns that people like you more when you DON'T.. try to eat them.
jk goerGRe learned nothing and will forget this information by tomorrow but he enjoys it for now
and then everyone loved geroge and then two people didn't love goerge and then one person didn't love george
and george became overwhelmed and georeoge took a little distance and almost bit many people but did not
georeoge only clipclapped his claws like a craff
good gereogere
i think this is the only way i can update for him so i'm sorry to everyone who tracked
4.5.2017
Today GeORgE learns that people who you tried to eat before won't want to be your friend just because you're full now. And sometimes people who you didn't try to eat still don't wanna be your friend ok
- healing but still owwy which makes him grumpy
- yesterday had a painful conversation with steini which was only painful because he doesn't like talking about himself and kids scare him a lot
- but it went well
- today feeling hissy about the hill above his parents' grave being a hangout point simply because he feels he can't mourn there alone
- but tbh he's only mad because he's going through puberty
- help him
4.6.2017
HARD TO UPDATE ON OUTDATED BIO SO I GIVE A SHITTY ONE BUT
- taking some distance lately, continuing to deal with his numb and 'outside' feelings. easily overwhelmed some days, able to choke it down others
- being obviously interested in preggo ismay. she's a kind'n
- aTTACKED BY KYRIAN. being sickly, mmMASSIVELY UNMOVING MOST DAYS and three legged, tripped more than once and was forced to surround himself with a shield of blood while shooting shards at Kyrian when he could. worked well enough to keep him from critical damage but came out of it mildly burned, kicked around by both the horse and the cross fire, and exhausted. Gotta.. Gotta work out lmao
- JUDE STEINI LIATHE FLETCHER (who had followed after him the whole time WHICH MADE HIM SORT OF NERVOUS IN A WAY BUT THEN HE ALSO KNEW IT WAS ALL HELP so it's ok dw i'm just a fucken nervous loser) RHEA CHECK ON HIM SO SWEET OWOUWUOWU
- also KEIDASI FROM A DISTANCE... come 2 me.. he don't. tysm tho
- grew overwhelmed with the crowd and tried to move off a bit
- daire asked if he needed anything. ADMITTED ANYTHING TO HELP BURNS WOULD BE GR8 WOW these hurt
- daire got him stuffs then said go drown yourself loser- jk he said go soak in water it good
- ok
- he do
- it's by kei and seaglass
- hello!
- hello kei!
26.5.2017
Joined Liathe, Ismay and Chiyoko (later Rhea and Fletcher as well) beneath the oak. Possibly drawn to company due to the rain, but.. either way! Felt oddly social. Interested with the pregnant doe, who brings memories of the sibling he never met. Had spent months doting on his mother who'd been ready to welcome his brother or sister to the world, only to give birth to a lifeless child. Distinctly remembered the mourning he, his father and mother had gone through and the tiny, frail face he'd seen for only minutes before they were taken away.
Silent and thoughtful, eyes often drifting to Ismay's round form though he tries not to stare.
16.5.2017
Has had his silent ups and downs during the past few days.
Spoke to Liathe on many a matter, from his dislike of certain things within her circle of friends, his growing distrust of their ways, to his own faults and fears. Found it all went rather nicely but came away from it all realizing she was the only one he found anything genuine in, when it came to him. Which was another subject crossed.
Also had an eye delivered to him, along with some blood from Keidasi. Thanked the boy silently, though remained in the company of 'Wendy' while the other child left. Bordered on terrified of the new face but merely read his books in silence.
Felt a drop in morale today, after some hours of sitting upon his favored hill and watching Liathe, Fletcher, Chiyoko, Dahval.. rHEA? tALLA? mORE? in the distance. Very aware that he, through their recent efforts, feels he isn't anywhere near being part of their 'family'. Accepting and fine with it, as he'd never looked to be a part of their family at all, though pained all the same as he thinks of how much he misses his own.
Thoughts, at times, drift to the Shepherd who is seen as long gone by now.
Secluded himself in the dark of the old oak, shifting away from a relative stranger fawn's (Kanan's) sudden affection. Has never been a fan of unsolicited contact- the nuzzles handed out by adults were difficult enough to bear. Culturally, understands things here are different. Where he's from, adults don't lay a kind or unkind hand on children who aren't theirs. And neither do other kids, to siblings who aren't of their blood.
BUT!
Couldn't be rude about it. Simply moved and watched the other mope for a moment before curling into himself. Remained with his face tucked against the roots when Rhea joined him, thoughts still fresh in his mind. Nearly spoke up of the treatment she'd given Bhaelum but couldn't find the strength and in the end, wound up alone once more.
11.5.2017
Found by Keidasi in the morning, much to his surprise.
Sat in silence for just a bit before the other spoke up and asked how his situation with Bhaelum went.
Admitted it had gone, in his opinion, terribly, and confessed to muzzling the creature and slicing its claws short. Went on to spew a bit of bitterness about his certainty that everyone was just much happier to kill him instead of any of the alternatives he'd offered- like moving Bhaelum out of the forest or secluding him in a specific place within it. Wondered if their refusal for alternatives was just an attempt to get him to give them the 'okay' for an execution.
Felt he was left with no choice but to practically mangle his creation if they were going to be allowed to live at all- when push came to shove didn't remotely trust that the group that seemed concerned with him wouldn't just kill the child if they deemed it necessary.
Cracked a little when Kei told him what he'd done was a good idea because he.. HADN'T.. heard it from anyone and personally felt he'd done a terrible thing, especially with being- whaT HE VIEWS AS- avoided since it all happened. But when shown a measure of approval, spilled a load of his feelings on the matter.
Nobody's spoken to me since then. They seem avoidant. I don't know why." Couldn't figure out if it was them seeing him as cruel, or having their own guilt.
"I don't understand why moving him wouldn't have been a good idea. Animals kill animals. They eat animals. These people eat animals. If we'd put him out in the woods somewhere, he could have hunted rabbits- if he got large.. Deer. The.. dim kind." The kind that didn't speak.
"Now he's made friends. And they've chased him around while he screamed and sobbed and drugged him and dragged him in and out and made him bloody and I can't throw him out of here now. Now it's cruel. They're always talking about 'mercy'- Liathe is, at least but they're all cruel. In their own ways."
Though quickly admitted that he did truly appreciate everything they'd done for him. Even so, had begun to feel a long time ago that what they've done for him and what they'd done that merely happened to benefit him in the end were two different things and one highly outweighed the other. The more time went on the more he wondered if they did these 'just' things for their own convenience, comfort, and moral codes.
Bitter as he seemed, maybe was, didn't actually hold anything against them. People were people and they were who they were and they were entitled to that. Wouldn't wish a bad thing on them and knows they've got good in their hearts. Just.. a different way of doing things.
Hit with a different perspective when Keidasi responded and spoke of his own experiences with the 'group'. Left with something to ponder on but knew no matter the case it wouldn't change anything. Not that he wanted to- the fact that they were trying to keep things safe, selfishly or not, was irrelevant if they actually were helping. So good on them for that.
As a last confession before dropping his emotional spill, hinted at some discomfort, perhaps hurt, with the fact that he felt as though he was more a moral obligation than someone they truly cared for. Because for all the times they've told him to hide, or offered him food, or protected him, or apologized, they'd never once spoken to him about the loss of his family which some of them had witnessed. Stated that that was what he thought of as true care. Not killing others for you.
His parents were long gone, but he still knew the feeling of true love and care- or so he thought- and it wasn't anything he'd felt in this forest since they'd died.
Was thanked for 'backing' Kei up with the Llyr situation too which WAS ALSO SURPRISING. Glad to hear it was perceived as a kind gesture, which he'd meant it to be. Even let a small smile form as they spoke on.
Had to deal with a little guilt for having 'spoken badly' on the group that had stayed by him for a long while, however. Not sure if he should, but.. sigh
10.5.2017
"I did it for you, anyway."
Removed his own eye in the early morning. 0 to 100 rq- except not really. Had done it for the purposes of his spell- hadn't wanted to hurt anyone else and besides, could only be certain he himself wouldn't die. Needs whoever he's taken the eye from to remain alive, so..
To avoid those issues, did what he needed to do.
Replaced the organ instantly with a ball of blood and seil- in the end it's likely nobody will be able to tell his eye is gone anyway. If anything they'd assume it turned red. for.. some.. reason.
dw just
a burst blood vessel...
Stole Nepenthe away from Wollunka later on, now knowing the male wasn't stable and apparently liked beating on fawns. Admittedly, waited for a while for someone else to do it but when that didn't happen, went over, led the SNEEZY FAWN SCREAM away and back to the.. children next door to him (Eden and Izumi) who he like never interacts with because he's loser but they're cute. SNEEZED ON TWICE by the little girl. HORRIFIED. ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIED.
But only balked and walked stiffly a few feet away. Sat down when Pence started to play with Eden and breathed a sigh of relief.
Yes.
Sneeze on him not me.
Left with a mix and match of fawn company until he was alone. Curled up at the logs, very poignantly noting Liathe's absence- at least, from his own presence. Can't help but think it's pointed, but doesn't have the heart to put any more thought into it.
Noted Saturn near the corpse of someone he knew Keidasi had often sat with- speak of the devil, the fawn approached before he could. Moved in to 'back' the boy up in the event that Saturn turned against him but things came to a slow.
Distance himself as a conversation ensued with the arrival of Farren, HALLA, NAAAD..?
When it ended, with no regard for apparent threats which he didn't construe as such towards himself or Keidasi, moved away, feeling out of place among the grieving group that settled around the corpse. Shut his eyes to keep them from rolling back in his head while Farren and Peach spoke of possibilities surrounding the dead doe's return, their fondness of her, desecration of the dead. Didn't doubt she would return but had a number of feelings about that- not that he didn't want her to. More than anything shut the thoughts out and drifted from the group some time later, finding it wasn't his place to be near and having no desire for it either.
9.5.2017
Very suddenly gave out under the weight of his myriad of mistakes, the loss of his parents and the failure of what he'd brought back. All compounded with never having once spilled any feelings with anyone related to his losses, failures and loneliness, found his foundation, rickety and useless as it was, crumbled.
In many ways feels much 'better' than he has since arriving in this place.
That said, felt nothing was stopping him from his endeavors anymore, perhaps, other than the possible scorn from others but, imagined in silence or not, that would always be with him.
now u can have the minideer spell because ur innocence is dead
JK ALKSDNDL TRYING IT OUT tho
Sat alone, then with distant Jude?!?!? then with Acobol, then was approached by Rhea who told him she'd brought Bhaelum back, fast asleep with a herb Liathe had given her. Led to the spot, thanked her for her help and once she left, got to work.
Did what he thought was the best he could do side from killing the beast and left them just after.
TRIED TO RETURN TO ACOBOL BUT FRIEND WAS gONE.
Sat lone again.
adding a buncha info now that i'm not a lazy bastard
9.5.2017
Both guilt ridden and heartbroken to find Bhaelum had hurt a child horribly, especially considering what North had told him to do- which was.. take care of the kid. Feels he's entirely to blame, from bringing the child into the world, to fearfully avoiding them.
All the worse to be told this news by Rhea in front of Keidasi who'd already expressed his distrust for Ichor's magic. Silently ashamed, took some time after the hyena's departure to decide what to do after initially telling her they could do anything but kill the creature.
Watched Keidasi walk away after an offer to come along- had expected no less and in fact, expects a lot worse to come. Sought Fletcher and Lia and told them he had a plan before leaving off with the request to bring Bhae back 'whenever'.
Curled up far enough away from his parents' grave tearfully.
5.5.2017
Talking about how to manage your cannibal creation and then watching it pet and smooch new friends and wondering how it has more friends than you but it tries to eat people maybe we'll just put george to sleep- JK JK LAKSNDLKNASD
Filled with some guilt for bringing the beast to life but also a little proud to see him socialize.
3.5.2017
Began the day alone, curled in a pile of logs and watching the rain. Uncomfortable, sitting on the soggy ground but SOON..
Tiny Fletcher with feathers arrived. Instantly smiled and somehow was driven into some play with the stag. Hopped and played, slipped around in the mud and eventually wound up at a sizeable pile of Liathe, Talla, 'Sweetkoi' and later Rhea. + Fletchandhimselfofc..
Sat comfortably but then slipped off towards Keidasi's scent. Invited him to sit with the others, but when he refused the offer politely, offered to sit with him alone.
Dropped his small smile when the other said, "You scare me," followed by the statement that he didn't mind if Ichor left or stayed. Ignored that latter bit to ask a quiet 'Why?'.
"I watched you lose your leg. Make that thing. You're a killer. And you didn't do it because he was hurting someone, right? Was just because you were mad. Not like you even need or like me, so I don't get why you keep bothering with me."
Felt his heart drop, but struggled to explain that he hadn't meant to kill Ioten- he'd never wanted to kill anyone. And he was learning from his mistakes. Lastly ensured he did like the fawn.
Looked at the ground in silence while the other pointed out that he still wanted to hurt people even if he didn't want to kill them, but offered that it was 'cool' he was learning.
Could only say that he wanted to hurt Ioten in the past but didn't anymore and cut himself off when he went to point out that the creature had killed his parents- knew Keidasi knew it, and if he didn't think it warranted the anger he felt, couldn't try to convince him otherwise. Because maybe it hadn't.
When asked why he liked Kei, said he didn't know. Just did.
In the end got a simple 'Whatever, sit down then,' from the Bloodwood but at that point really just wanted to crawl away and weep. Chose to stay for some.. unfathomable reason despite it, but stood and faced away from the other for the most part, letting the rain conceal the fact that his heart was just a LIL BROKEN.
Found himself questioning why he was bothering the other at all, after a while. All for- at this point- giving people chances but it was massively clear at this point that the Elysian held no fondness for him and was likely just letting him stay around out of pity. In the end, he was dangerous and likely undesirable company- had selfishly pushed his company on the other assuming he was lonely and he (ichor) could do him (kei) a favor in being his friend when.. cOME TO FIND OUT, it wasn't the case.
Rapidly spiraled into a number of thoughts that only got darker until finally concluding that he'd put an end to his project, knowing his parents would be ashamed of him now.
In the end lasted a full twenty minutes by the child's side and slipped away for solitude.
29.4.2017
Briefly halting his project to make
p R E S E N T S
Finished in the evening and delivered first, the ones meant for 'gratitude'.
Found Fletcher and Liathe in the plaats and delivered most to them. Gave them oneeach and asked them to deliver the rest to Acobol,Rhea, and Talla. Stifled a smile at their thanks and praise and skittered off just as the expression made its way through.
Went and delivered one to Daire as well. Smarted a little at hearing his birth name for the first time in a while (as he'd given it to the beast yesterday PLAYER FORGOT TO MENTION DAIRE FILLED HIM IN ON ALL THE 'dANGERS' OF THE FOREST) so told him gently that he could call him 'kid' as he had before if he wanted. But Daire said he'd think up something better. bELIEVED IT.
Then found Keidasi and offered him one of a different shape.
Announced it was for him and apologized once more for not teaching him what he'd said he would. Remains more or less guiltless for the mistake but sorry at the same time that it seemed to bother the other.
Internally sighed when Kei only asked 'why' in return but asked what 'why' meant.. And the other glossed over it with a thanks. Told the Bloodwood that he could go if he wanted but was told to pretty much do w/e hE wanted. And sighed inside again but settled down.
WHAT DO YOU WANT kEIDASI GoD AdAMN TINAINLAWKN!1
28.4.2017
Still working.
Scribbled in his book through the morning and greeted Fletcher, Liathe and Daire before skittering off to gather some more ingredients.
Made his way to the pond and found Wollunka in it. dOESN'T KNOW SHIT ABOUT HIM SO JUST. Hello kind stranger. Had seen him fighting someone once but has seen everyone murdering someone at some point so it's sort of a pointless moment you know what i mean
Approached him and asked if he could help him get a fish without killing it. After a pause and lingering silence, watched the beast sink under the water to gently grab a koi. By that time, Fletcher arrived. Stumbled back irritated when the stag pushed himself between the pond's dropoff, the beast within it and himself. But chose to walk under his legs and meet an emerged Woll who handed him the wriggling fish. Took it carefully and thanked him, wishing him a good day before moving to settle near a log and very 'gently' (if it's even possible) pop some scales off of the fish.
While there, and seeing both Liathe and Daire in the distance, quietly asked Fletcher what was wrong, because clearly sometHING WAS.
Felt a swell of negativity to be told Wollunka was a massive danger, followed by the stag apologizing for not telling him earlier. Responded with assuring it was fine while internally fUCkING nERDSing because he'd heard that 'sorry you weren't told' just the other day and both situations seemed like a simple iF yOU tOLD mE tHINGS cOULD bE aVOIDED
But just. The Lord is Testing Me. So stayed calm and forgiving and just.. said it was okay and he'd be careful.
Let the fish back into the stream as Fletcher left, then took his leave shortly after to return to his parents. Dried off in the sun for a while then crossed another item off the list.
27.4.2017
Woke early and looked through a few of his books, a new idea in mind that doesn't involve such dangerous means as bringing his parents' bodies back from ash and bone. Or at least he.. assumes it's less dangerous sigh.
In the midst of scribbling a list of what he'll need to do what he needs to do, when Fletcher approached. Had a short talk that involved the stag's apology which was taken easily and in earnest. Welcomed him to sit with him but announced through Ith'fy that he might be leaving for a walk around to gather some supplies eventually. When offered some help, said he may need it.
Started with the 'easiest' list item and dug into his parents' grave. Took some time but eventually reached a skull and uncovered it enough to knock out a tooth with a few taps. Took it after regarding the bones silently then covered everything back up.
Gathered flowers with Fletcher's help and spread them over the grave then attempted cast a spell of flowers overtop but only sprouted a few little weeds. MMM well.. i fokken tried..
Scratched that off the list.
After some time, left Fletcher's side to seek out Keidasi. While remaining a little doubtful that the other youth wants much more than the information he's able to give him on magics or the like, assumes, at least, they can benefit each other. Besides, likes him well enough.
Approached and asked about the planTBOY's access to plants, if he had any water holding plants and any poisonous ones. Was flat out asked what he needed the poison for and told him it was part of a spell but assured that if he didn't know where to get some, he could find the plant himself.
Taken slightly aback when Kei pointed out that he'd said he was going to teach him magic. Responded that he did say that, but when offering, Kei had just taken his book, read it for a while then left, got his own and never spoke about it again so he didn't.. get the impression he needed him.
Still, said that he could teach him now that he knew he still wanted it. And they could start learning with his current project or they could start with something else.
fEeLiNGs when the other responded with a 'Whatever' and told him he didn't need him anymore, but got up to go get what he'd asked for.
Quickly but gently said that in that case, he didn't need to get him anything as he'd thought they were helping each other before then. Didn't like the feeling that he'd actually done nothing for his 'friend' (if two socially inept dwarfs like them can form actual friendships) and they seemed irritated by it but still felt the need to get him whatever he'd asked for. Said instead that they should practice together some time and he could still try to teach him. eVEN PLAYING FIELD and mutual.. growth.
Got no response other than a flick of Kei's tail as he left, which was easily taken as a repeat of 'i don't need you i said u foken loser'.
Feeling increasingly disliked by the boy but doesn't have the ability to be any friendlier than he's tried to be. Aside from that, pretty sure the silence to his question of studying together was a clear rejection of an attempt at active as opposed to passive and questionable friendship. Likely too numb to be shaken deeply but feels a miserable pang here and there.
Took to the pond to look at himself for a moment and get a drink, then returned to his parents' grave where Kei had dropped the items off.
26.4.2017
Today Ichor talked to Liathe, got some moxie back, found a new purpose and became the forest's tiniest priest.
24.4.2017
Approached last night by a stranger, S'vea who, in some seemingly lukewarm but genuine way, attempted to dote on him and offer him milk, warmth, and trinkets all of which he denied until the last. Accepted purely because he began to feel guilty saying- or shaking his head- no to everything she offered him. Got shard of moonstone from her, which she claimed was 'like him'. Thanked her only with a grateful look before she settled nearby.
Continues to be at a loss, worse yet with growing paranoia.
Bruised and with shallow puncture wounds around a haunch after an incident with the creature that he created during the attempt to bring his parents back to life. Bitter and fearful of it, not to mention lethargic and hurting, made no effort to chase it when it ran from the den he kept it in.
A bit of nervousness sparked at the arrival of Naamah who he knows to be close to Liathe. Jittery but keeping still and refusing to give off anything but his commonly unaffected air.
Continued on with it even when the child invited him closer by raising a wing. Obliged and shuffled in silently after a moment of confusion.
Shifted away from the hug to sit between Naa and Keidasi when the later appeared. And then lowered his head and rested dimly when Kei silently turned away from Naa's suggestion they all snuggle.
Muddled when Kei left hours later and Naamah snuggled him once more. Remained alone when the other left too but broke into something of a panic later on.
Took a brisk walk to the person he was the least panicked around at the time being AGAIN KEIDASI. Sat beside the fawn and, after a moment broke into a weeping fit. Comforted for a time by Kei who snugged and pulled a blanket over him, but it was short lived when the Bloodwood asked if he wanted to speak about his 'woes.'
Somewhat desperately 'spoke' through his 'puppet' about the goings on between the All-Taker, Liathe, Fletcher, Rhea and others. Expressed a sense of betrayal and confusion for having known nothing about it until he killed the Grinner.
Brought further down by the feeling he was mostly brushed off aside from the pink fawn telling him he understood the irritation with not being told. WHICH MEANT SOMETHING, without a doubt.
Receded into himself when it was suggested (thought not so simply as written) he should be happy they made a deal because it was beneficial, he was lucky that they said anything at all after he killed the male, and if he didn't agree with any of it, he should 'lose them', the other claiming it's 'not like he needs them'. No doubt Kei was simply speaking his mind without malice or judgement- logic if nothing else, but could only feel belittled and ungrateful for his inability to forgive. Coupled with the other's flat affect that bordered on annoyed near constantly, as well as an earlier comment saying he often kept the company of those he didn't like, had felt he wasn't entirely.. lIKED HIMSELF, for a few reasons. ironically talked himself out of the fear days before because 'i mean he comes to sit with me so obv he likes me' but then oh no
Quieted for a moment, stood up after a while and thanked the fawn for the comfort, simply saying he was right, but excused himself to sleep.
Got the advice to speak with them 'first' to get their explanations as he was going. Only nodded to that, but saw no point in talking now and more than that, couldn't imagine he'd have the will to bother searching into 'why's anymore.
Slipped off, embarrassed and feeling starkly alone, to his parents' grave but left shortly after he found himself unable to stomach the area.
Found another tree to curl up against for the night.
22.4.2017
Lost and unsure of just what he should do now and who he should be angry at, if anyone.
Glad to see Keidasi whose absence hasn't gone unnoticed but otherwise keeps still and silent while watching distant figures.
19.4.2017 *AS A WARNING ichor can't do any of the shite he does in the following update to anyone he doesn't have a 'blood' tie to, or anyone who isn't massively weak to his particular magic. the bub is no OP baby sigh. u can still kill him by sneezing on him p much
tl;dr qanat's characters continue to ruin each others lives
Kept company for much of the night by Daire, surprisingly, which kept him from initial plans. Unsure of just how comforted he was in lieu of recent realizations and thoughts but remained curled up and snoozing until early morning.
Noted the beast gone but was joined by Izumi and Joriah. On top of that, Liathe had found her way back and Romulus and Hammel relaxed feet away.
Waited for some time then rose to his hooves and limped himself off to the pond.
Found the All-Taker. Met with grins and a few curious words- neither of which he responded to while he counted the claws. Set his sights on Liathe and Rhea who'd followed in the distance and finding himself somewhat 'satisfied' with the onlookers doing just that, set forth a bloody barrage of blades and shards. Hoped that it would result in the male's rage which would lead to a number of things but found the outcome different.
Sprayed, soaked and briefly blinded with red while the Grinner's throat all but exploded. Flinched away from the heat while the beast fell wordlessly with sputters and kicks- grabbed in the Taker's claws and squeezed for a moment- felt a rib snap before, thankfully, the grip went limp.
Tumbled back then, wide eyed with a final glance to the distance dragon and hyena and bounded off.
Retreated to his parents' grave where Rhea found him shortly after.
Could only avert his gaze and distort his expression into something foul- paranoid and under the belief that those he felt safe with had allied with the murderer of his parents.
Sickened and angered by the Hyena's praise (though unaware she was among the least willing to work with Ioten at all) when she said he'd done well- half enraged that she'd stepped over his parents' grave to sit closer to him and nearly desperate for someone to understand the point he was trying to make even if he couldn't speak it.
Only relaxed somewhat when the female left his side.
Even more frustrated with Liathe's approach and apology- turned his head away and took a shaky breath. And when the dragon doe went on to explain her intentions, turned to scream a single, foreign word at her only to instantly recoil and curl into a ball as if saying the word physically hurt. Tucked his limbs and head and wept silently.
Qanat - Today at 1:31 PM
the equivalent of a kid fuckin gettin mad and throwing something but then it bounces back and hits him in the balls and he falls on the floor
Remained curled and tearful while the doe left for a nearby hill.
18.4.2017
Made aware of specific associations today.
Hollowed out (if it's even pOSSIBLE tO bE mORE hollow at this point) and closed off but subtly so.
Unconsciously refusing to look at anyone for now, and keeping his writing utensils tucked away.
Waiting for the right time.
16.4.2017
ACTUALLY HUNG OUT WITH A BUNCH OF KIDS
15.4.2017
Returned silently.
Made a quick dash to the pond where he desperately gulped down mouthfuls of water until he felt sick. Went on to feel a little more sick when he realized a doe who'd kept his company at times (Jhorla) was lying in the pond, smelling rather ill. Whether he was made to feel unwell because of empathy for her condition or the mere fact that she was lying in the water he just drank... IS uNKNOWN.
Noted Fletch watching him in the not-so-distant distance and felt EVEN MORE SICK- JK SIGH JKJK
Without a move, switched his gaze to the pond once more as his guardian approached to ask him if he was alright- could only nod. And when kindly offered some tea, refused gently. Was left soon after, but not before being told he was missed. Gave no visible show of what he may have thought, but did think plenty.
Opted to sit by Jhorla and read.
At least, until he noticed Foxtrot's skinned corpse floating in the pond. Stared for a good long while before wading closer and, using sharpened blades of blood, cut off the rat-like tail and took the caps of one of the boy's hooves.
Stuffed both in his satchel, the tail lengthy enough to stick halfway out of his bag haphazardly, and returned to Jhorla's side. Glad that the doe managed to drag herself out of the pond somewhat but wonders where her family and friends are. Considering calling on someone for help and yet also not really considering anything at all.
Stayed by her side for a long while before others of her friends and family scooped her up. Followed after a while to watch from the sidelines but left them to their time to sit alone elsewhere.
12.4.2017
Disappeared, leaving only his scent behind.
11.4.2017
Lacking the heart to move, eat or generally react to presences. At the least, not particularly unhealthy aside from minimal loss of weight.
it's like rping a wet towel
7.4.2017
Listless.
20.3.2017
Growing morbidly unmoved with violence and pain. Unknown if it's a defense mechanism for his own 'softness' or just desensitization.
In either case, rose briefly to stand over a sleeping Kei when those all over the forest started hunting and brawling. Sent his skulled 'friend' to hover over Acobol as well, when the fawn joined them. Watched both Fletcher and Liathe panic and stand guard over them, initially worried as well until something in him just 'turned off'.
Flopped to the ground and pulled out a book. Read in silence while the beasts warred around him.
17.3.2017
On the upside, created a being formed of blood and bone to speak through, as planned. Had hinted that to North weeks ago, hoping he won't be angry about this as he was about his attempts to resurrect his parents.
Still caring for the strange, grotesque blob that was 'born' as a result of that disaster. Confused about its rapid growth, much larger than him now.
ON THE DOWNSIDE, surrounded by horror and bleeding people.
Quickly ran from that scene, red in the face and hot eared. Angry for some reason, as much as he's horrified. Did learn that flower petals aren't as pretty coming up as they are going down.
13.3.2017
[4:35:52 PM] §?lv?rfish: now you gotta save me ok
[4:36:12 PM] ?å.nalan: :^( my leg is gone.
Essentially that's all.
Doing a terrible job at interacting with other children, and a .. not too great job at doing the same with adults. Quieted and introverted in the wake of his 'accident'- more than usual. Worse yet, pretty damn grumpy, but effectively keeps that to himself. Dealing with a loss of direction now that all he'd worked up to is for naught, and in pain to boot.
12.3.2017
Taken to North's home and given further treatment for his injuries. Also treated to some painkillers, food and comforts when he was able to eat- as well as special containers to store blood in so he wouldn't have to use his any longer- which North's barred him from if only because it, at his size and health, isn't good for him. Spent the next day on a couch while North offered everything he needed and got some much needed rest.
Finds that he's able to recover from the initial fear of losing everyone he'd gained quickly, as the Shepherd's logic was pretty sound- none of them had shown signs of disliking him for what he'd done, even if he felt he deserved it.
hOWEVER, fearful of one thing in particular that he hopes to bring up eventually with someone.
Brought back into the forest today, briefly stopping by Liathe and Fletcher. Tiptoed off when he saw them snuggling among fireflies and returned to North and Rojan- well, mostly.
Walked around the area, with the intention of rAPIDLY getting used to his missing limb. Finds it's not quite working because for the moment, it feels like it's still there.
After a bit, settled beneath a mushroom comfortably.
10.3.2017
Gave in to offers for help during the night when he realized each time he'd doze off, the blood would begin to ooze again. Wrapped and treated by Laithe, slept fitfully along with her, Fletcher and Keidasi.
Woke late into the noon and bid Kei a goodbye when his father came to pick him up. Gently refused the invitation home as and immediately caught North's (very disappointed) eye.
Slunk/hobbled up to him silently and was asked if he was in pain. Admitted, very much so. Grew nervous when the Shepherd excused them both from Fletcher's company and carried him to a quiet place.
Was scolded from there out, called out on his obviously reckless thinking, for hurting someone else's child and making himself lame, being foolish and betraying North's trust. OF COURSE, fell to bits and broke into tears- most distraught that he'd (however unintentionally) 'tricked' the man into buying him gifts that only ended up hurting everyone. Desperate enough to explain himself that he forced words out- albeit barely more than cracked whispers that, at times, were only ghosts of the mouthed words.
Between numerous apologies, admitted he just missed his parents and wanted them back. Heartbroken to be told that not everyone could be brought back, no matter what. Realized just as the canine spoke the words- he could have avoided this all if he'd just asked.
In fewer words, tried to explain that he was afraid- and now more than ever, with the idea that others may not want to be around him anymore after finding out what he'd done. Questioned if he was alone now, and was corrected- told that it was clear he wasn't.
Humbled beneath the pain, attempted to return the books North gave him but was allowed to keep them- not without a warning not to break the Shepherd's trust again. Swore up and down with a vigorous shake of his head that he wouldn't. And with his apology accepted, attention turned to his leg. When asked what he wanted to do about it, mouthed a request.
Brought back to his parents' grave, where he was questioned about the little. blob of life there.
Was told to make a decision, kill it or care for it. Couldn't fathom killing the thing, 'nodded' that he'd find.. some way to care for it BUTHELPMEIHAVENOIDEAWTFTODO. North was nice enough to put it by his tree cubby.
Returned to the grave to dig- North did all the work, Ichor scooped a few bits of dirt. Then watched the Shep' push his leg into the dip and cover it with dirt.
Considered it a final goodbye to them, burying a part of himself with his family and accepting he'd never see them again. Scooped up and brought to a flower patch to watch fireflies with the canine, spoke a little
but player needs to savebefore losing this shit
9.3.2017
Decided that, with yesterday's danger, fear and ultimately his flare of bravery, he had to set his plans in motion tonight.
Thin and worn, but with a bright glint of determination and pride in his eyes, set off to finally try his hand at what he'd been studying for.
Perhaps prematurely proud about it, planned on gathering the closest youngling that he knew. Too shy to show other adults (but didn't mind Liathe's proximity), but would be quick to show them when he succeeded.
SO, grabbed Keidasi and brought him to his parents' grave. i killed ur parents kei- JJKJKJKJK
his own parents
Settled in the sunlight and took a breath, pulling his book out and placing down a number of objects, organic and otherwise that he collected. Placed them closely together, drew a messy symbol in the ground with his hoof while the other boy watched on. Nervous once he reached the final step, paused to take a breath and flash Kei a determined smile to offset those feelings of anxiety. After that, quickly gathered courage and beamed with excitement.
Finally, reared back and in the last step, stamped both of his hooves on the symbol.
Instantly felt what appeared to be a sudden gust of wind, followed by a forceful 'bang' and spray while the ground flew out from underneath him.
Hit the ground hard.
Too surprised, mainly felt his heart pounding in his chest when he looked toward the grave weakly, seeing nothing more than a writhing mass of.. something slightly reminiscent of a fetal quadruped. Both hollowly disappointed and afraid of what he'd brought up because it definitely wasn't his parents.
After a realization, turned toward Keidasi fearfully. Horrified to see the other bloodied and slashed- moreso afraid when he went from looking annoyed, to surprised, to bolting away. Could only think he was angry at him- couldn't blame the child, because wow that was nnnot.. a good experience.
Looking back at the scene, noted a familiar, white limb. Mistakenly thought it was coming from the ground and assumed his mother was pulling herself from the grave. Balked for a moment, realizing it was actually his own.
[2017-03-09 11:58:06 PM] ?å.nalan: omg but i created a leg. it's beautiful. slick. white. like my mother's. my mother's leg- wait a minute lmfao
Turned when he heard hoof steps approaching- Keidasi had brought Liathe and Fletcher. Immensely soured by his catastrophic failure and having injured a potential friend to boot, took care to avoid any chance of being babied or pitied.
Struggled to his feet and pulled the gushing blood back into his body through the wound. Made some effort to drag the limb closer as well but.. he manipulates blood, not babyleg
Shifted as Fletcher moved closer, not entirely listening to the adults speaking. Mouthed an apology to Keidasi who didn't notice it.
And then dimly reached a few bloody tendrils out to grab his leg, attempting to 'place it back on' in vain. Unsurprisingly, it didn't work.
Let the leg drop and gave in, dimly noting both Fletcher and Liathe's comments on the matter.
Refused offers for help- knew it was taking energy to keep the blood from falling but feeling about 10 different kinds of guilty and discouraged.
player's so tired though SO THESE UPDATES ARE LACKING-
p much made a few more attempts to mouth apologies to kei, refused help from fletch and lia and then curled up to sleep
________
8.3.2017
Finished his preparations. Just nervous about actually putting his plans into motion.
Nervousness wound up as flat out terror when Fletcher appeared by him and told him to hide before he took off after a threat. WHICH, unsurprisingly threw him into unpleasant memories. Bolted into the den his mother and father had hidden him in out of instinct and curled up, only to, moments later burst out of it.
Ran full throttle for Keidasi's scent, terrified that the other fawn would be torn to shreds. Actually managed to jump the stream somehow and land in a heap beside the Bloodwood. Mouthed 'danger' and shook him awake, pulling him towards the 'den'. Relieved when he followed but felt his eyes sting the entire time they ran back to their hiding spot.
Tucked into it tightly and waited for Fletcher to return- which, much to his relief, he did. Leaked a few tears and considered pushing the stag away from the tree- somehow the sight of him near it brought back a few visions. Decided not to, though- or rather just couldn't move or articulate what he wanted.
PLAYER HAS TO EAT LUNCH THO MORE AT 11:00
Hanging with Keidasi has been eventful
25.2.2017
Fluctuating emotionally between his commonly numb silence and moments of near desperation. Feels horribly alone despite his constant, silence presences. Has some sensation of being 'alien', in a way, new to this place and its inhabitants. More-so the silence that hangs in the air even when surrounded by scores of company is strange and unsettling.
Continuing to work.
Remained alone and snoozing for most of the day, a little fitful.
Much later found by North who placed him into his back. Was taken on a walk around the forest as he clung to the beast, overseeing everything. Once they stopped by Rhea, slipped off and rested against the shepherd's side. Was asked about his magic and if he'd made friends. Magic progress was good, but admitted he hadn't been able to do the later, feeling he wasn't good at it. Felt a little better to know North had the same troubles. Also admitted things had become 'quiet' but didn't go into it deeply, not wanting to sound selfish. After some speaking/writing about his progress in magic, was invited out to buy more books and have a meal afterwards. Accepted after being sure it wouldn't be a huge trouble but had little chance of saying no anyway, being starved for interaction and a change of pace as he was.
Briefly left with Rhea when the beast said he'd needed to do something before they left. Spent the time sketching the hyena while she slept. s e c r e t
Left with Shep' shortly after.
22.2.2017
Feeling ill, as is the cost for rapid progress in other facets, but left proud in his own way.
Seems to have made a new 'friend', in the form of a half decomposed bird perched on his shoulder. Tiny flowers woven through its ribcage and stuffed delicately into an exposed eyesocket to keep it 'pretty'. Proud of that, too. (As well as chuffed with its lack of scent, which was a problem at a time.)
Not exactly proud of its lack of any sort of response to stimulus but.. well enough.
Otherwise weak and a little wobbly.
20.2.2017
Tired.
Woke where he'd fallen asleep, at the pond. Rubbed his eyes with a knee and stood just in time to find Hammel approaching him. Exchanged sniffs and nearly ran as the stag began to circle him, but didn't take his actions as predatory. Figuring they wouldn't bother to sniff him first, and bow to boot, if they wanted to kill him.
Fletcher intervened, Hammel slipped off. Remained with the dragon for the rest of the day.
19.2.2017
Finds his discomfort growing as he views the newborns and their parents so close to the site of his own parents' death.
Not only that, but fatigued with the ramifications of his experimenting. Today, decided to walk away from the sight of the aforementioned and sought out someone.. slightly familiar.
Found Dupin in what appeared to be a standoff with another fawn, 'Fogkissed'. Bowed to 'Pin, then watched the other fawn appear to toss a few bONKS at her. Didn't know how to view it despite it likely being all in play- didn't think Dupin liked it and so dropped his bag book and threw his thin frame at the other. Bonked his head plenty and spent most of his time running and kicking out his back legs when the playful fawn turned on him.
Attempted to doubleteam with Dupin, assuming they would both take the new one on, but in the end found himself alone when both walked away. Stared after both blankly with a dim ache in his chest and a burning in his ears before both flowed down into some... dank emotional pit or something.. Quick to snap out of it and throw the loop of his satchel back over his neck. Leaned against a tree for some time before dragging himself and his books over to the pond's dropoff. Curled up and pulled out something to read.
15.2.2017
Feeling lonely the past few days. Working vehemently on his magic.
Progressing rapidly at a cost.
8.2.2017
first he felt like
but then he was like
7.2.2017
'Mastering' some low level blood manipulation. Can't quite make it a solid- remains drippy and messy but at least he can suck it back up so it's not too terrible..
Hasn't grasped the idea of using anyone else's blood for his purposes, so winds up sickly and weak while using it. Still, progress is progress and.. WE LEARNIN
Today, sitting with Rhea, Fletcher and North.
Comfortable.
5.2.2017
Today Ichor attempts to make friends by using their heads as book stands.
1.2.2017
Appears to be ... tryingtomakefriends
Mainly doing this by finding other small beings (Dupin and Cathal in particular) and reading beside them. Which is.. not a good method but EY.
Horrified, silently, when Foxtrot shook water from the pond off of his pelt and oNTO PRECIOUS NOTEBOOK yesterday. Balked and had some vietnam flashbacks but didn't make a fuss. Simply closed the book and sat on top of it, avoiding eye contact for the rest of the night to avoid eluding to his internalcrying.
Today found Dupin again (Cathal joining soon after) and watched Liathe drip water onto the fawn, much to the babe's dismay. the pond is a dangerous place
28.1.2017
i'm still so fucking sick idk if i can even write anything but i'ok i'm gonna try why does my IV site burn am i dying bye i guess bye see you in hell
Disappeared for a few days, returning today pink tinted from a subpar attempt to clean matted blood from his vanilla pelt.
No thinner than he was before, and.. apparently no bigger, though he should be growing like a weed at his age.
- Found Liathe.
- Acobol found them and gave him a SNAKE SHED. Super interested. Thanked him with a nuzzle and stored that away for future use.
21.1.2016
Woke up, looked over at Fletcher and saw a crow (liathe who he doesn't know is liathe) sitting on his antlers. For whatever reason, enraptured with the sight and rapidly got to writing about it while staring dreamily.
At one point prompted the bird to whistle at him when he offered a little whistle. Felt some tiny flare of excitement but backed off after flashing a piece of paper that said 'thank you'.
[11:44:44 AM] Bethany: What Have I Done.
[11:45:05 AM] ?å.nalan: nothing I literally just like birds
Noted Acobol's arrival, but had no idea how to approach the other child.
Watched quietly as his tiny guardian (Hikari) arrived, scribbling about their interactions.
Shortly after, found Fletcher rose and the bird exploded into the form of Liathe which.. Immediately had him assuming Liathe was a shapeshifter. And thus Liathe gained her first fanboy.
Sidestepped closer to the female when she stood beside Fletcher, staring ahead and pointedly avoiding eye contact while his face turned red.
Shifted close to Acobol when Hikari disappeared, putting his three layers of blankets over the both of them to keep the other warm, and returning to his reading.
It took a while but actually noticed the actual snakes on Acobol's actual head at some point. Actually. Hadn't gotten close enough to see them with his blurry eyes but once he did had a moment of 'EEEEEEEEEEEEA' and then wondered if they could read.
Went on to imagine the snakes learning fire spells and blasting down the forest. But then also thought that would be really cool, because they could protect Acobol..
And suddenly wished he had headsnakes..
Slipped away for a short time, leaving Acobol his pelts and closed books to seek out North after writing something on a piece of paper. Slipped the paper (which had a simple 'hello' on it) between the half-sleeping shepherd's hand. Received an appreciated 'hair' ruffle from the canine and turned to leave- jumping when he noticed Umay behind him. Offered her a soft nod too then returned to his spot, noting Aco had moved. Curled up back under his pelts and later on welcomed Liathe to read when she asked.
eVEN LATER, given an egg by Acobol. Confused at first but took it and nestled it to his chest to keep it warm, assuming he could hatch it. BUT.. Acobol got another egg from Hikari and cracked it open then lapped it up. At which point Ichor realized it was the 'food' type of egg.
Thought he'd put his learning to use and gathered rocks from the area, put them in a circle and ripped a page from his notebook. Blew some spark-laced breaths at it in hopes of it catching fire but hadn't.. actually made enough progress for that. Somewhat defeated, just cracked the egg on both ends then sucked the contents out and swallowed them, leaving the shell mostly intact.
Couldn't say he liked the taste- didn't taste like much at all but .. s'a fun way to eat an egg if you can't cook it up. If you're a maGICAL fAILURE.
Caught Acobol looking impressed and promptly turned red in the face once more.
20.1.2017
With the cold making him sleepy, kept curled up most of the day and snoozing.
aka player was out... so... sigh
19.1.2017
Turns out North bought him like 4 books, and a book to write in.
Mostly magic based, spells and the basics- a continuation of his learning before the forest.
Today woke to a light snow and Liathe, Fletcher and Ross on the nearby hill. Chilly, wrapped himself in.. all three blankets he'd been directly given- North's mink blanket, covered by Sophie's wolf pelt, covered by Fletcher's knit quilt. Quickly warmed up and toasty which brought a little comfort, but quickly felt a little colder at the thought of the warmth his parents used to bring. Receded into his little 'cave' to weep for all of a few minutes before popping back out and pulling a book from his bag.
Met Jonah shortly after- a little apprehensive about their appearance but a bow from them dissuaded any reservations, before they left off for the hill.
Watched Liathe absently for a while and after some consideration, got up, dragged his blankets and his bag up the hill to settle close to the female.
Was later on asked if she could read his book with him- obliged silently, enjoying the company in his activity.
18.1.2017
As promised, was taken out by North the night prior.
After a meal and some 'television' that consisted of the child choosing to watch the news while North finished up a thing or two, was brought to a book store.
Went to a specific isle after some searching and got two books, selfish as he felt for getting even one. MORE DETAILS LATER BUT
Was returned to the forest today, quickly finding Fletcher and Liathe, making sure both were alive. Relieved when both were indeed intact- at least mostly. Settled by them and pulled a book from his bag, getting sucked in quickly. Read.. so much. At some point attempted to shift a foreleg into an arm, which wound up looking gruesome. Quickly dropped that and tried for an easier 'paw' but wound up causing himself a cramp in the limb so promptly stopped, deciding that he could read without having hands to turn the pages. No.. big deal.
Took a break when his eyes grew strained and packed his books into the satchel, looped the 'handle' around his neck and dragged it off with him.
Headed towards Acobol and stopped short, sitting and taking his book out again. Studied the little fawn as well as the family (Zafeiri, Devani, Sunil, Sitara, Marbas) that stood not far off from the battered fawn, dancing gleefully.
Quickly took a 'pencil' he made from coals between his teeth and messily scribbled something down. Moments after stuffing his books away again and taking another step towards the snake fawn, Liathe showed.
Glad as it'd been his intention in part to get someone to note the child. Then cue many stages of confusion.
Asked by Liathe, after she'd gotten the fawn onto her back, if he wanted to help her bring Acobol back to the others. Looked at her with something close to a tired confusion, having no idea how he could lend aid if she'd already picked the fawn up. He couldn't carry them, or help them get onto her back and so wasn't sure how he would be helping.
Round one of questions a child should be able to answer, fAILED.
Then asked, after his look, if he'd like to lend a hand by helping lead the way back to the others. Narrow his eyes further with even more confusion because surely she'd been here longer than him and just came from the direction the others would at..
Round two also failed.
Grabbed his satchel and did as he was asked, leading the way back and settling in the sun patch over his parents' grave and returning to his reading.
Met the bzou and Hiru.
Spent most of his time reading silently but did stand when Hiru got excitable.
Didn't outright refuse he attempts to get him to dance and play, merely.. didn't.
Watched Fletcher appease the girl and dance a bit before everyone sat back down.
Thoughtful.
17.1.2017
Barely able to sleep the night before- plagued by nightmares, missing his family.
Eventually gave up well into noon and found some jars of milk, and gigantic flower petals. (from liathe.. wtf did you do to the sylvari lia... what did you do)
Lapped at the milk and chomped on a petal.
Eyes sunken and reddened, ears drooping.
Aimless, lost and lonely even with distant faces that show concern when he can manage to drag his eyes towards them. Kind strangers.
Settled in a flower patch, still close to his distant saviors and carers.
Felt his eyes well up when North joined him and shifted close enough to barely touch the shepherd's foot.
Remained staring vacantly at swaying grass when Rojan appeared and spoke to his father- snapped into 'reality' when the canine rose and handed him a bag of cinnamon bread, cheese and dried meat. Was told to go to Liathe or Fletcher if anything went south, and that he'd be listening out, too.
Watched him go with no.. rEAL WAY or strength to show gratitude and promptly went on to simulate home life by putting the cheese and some flower petals from Liathe between two slices of the cinnamon bread. Made a.. well... s'a sandwich. Sloppy, but still. Made another and packed it back into the bag then ate the first.
just like momma MADE OH GOD- k well we see my record for serious updates is like.. 24 hours.
Some time later, met Umay in a quiet way. Received a look and a smile from her to which he responded with little more than glossy eyes- welcoming and open to everyone kind to him but sssso massively unable to show it- at the least gives off an air of gentle curiosity.
Noted another fawn (Dupin) brought over but too sucked into his mind to be able to acknowledge them properly. A week ago, would have been overjoyed to see the child- had little chance to socialize with those his age in the past despite his absolute love for fun and games. Now, absorbs them as being 'around' but not something to play with- though that seems to go with every.. livingthingrly..
Not that he'd thought about it.
Locked onto Liathe's disappearance, one he later investigated. Found her curled up with hurt child, Acobol, and was offered a small smile by the bloodied female. Set with a number of feelings and thoughts but only turned to walk back- jumping when he noticed Fletcher had followed him. Somewhat nervous with the stag on his heels, primarily because he hadn't expected him. Made to wonder if danger was around or if something was wrong, and that aside felt a keen confusion about why he was being followed but felt it was.. something was bad ok. Likely just because he'd met all of these people in the wake of a terrible thing.
Rushed back to his parents' grave for a time, only to slip off once more.
Strolled to the pond to get some water, then followed his nose to the bluebowl.
Bounded away from it when a nameless thundered by and spooked him out of his blueberry binge.
Then wandered around aimlessly, over time slipping into a state of belated grief. Rapidly cracked and silently 'wailed', making his way to Fletcher but somehow finding the idea of crying in front of Talla and Dupin as well as the dragon, very rude.
Slunk off and followed North's scent instead (i'm sorry bort i'm so sorry), standing beside him and letting tears fall. Made no closer moves, just wanted to be 'with' someone while hurting but was pulled into an embrace by the shepherd himself. Curled up in his fur and wept silently.
Fell asleep after a bit of that, waking minutes before Fletcher appeared to deliver both he and the shepherd blankets. Showed gratitude best he could, 'clammed back up' after the break, but quickly, selfishly after some consideration attempted to make a request.
Without words didn't get far. Was able to ask of Liathe's condition by gesturing in her direction and showing his concern- shut it out entirely while looking at it head on but once away and feeling 'safe', could allow himself to be worried for her. Somewhat relieved by the answer.
Attempted to ask about her necklace next but lost steam quickly and decided he didn't want to know the answer. Moved on to make a request that didn't get far- wound up being snugged between North and Fletcher while they tried to figure out if that's what he wanted. Opted into silence, accepting the doting as much more than they owed him and briefly feeling selfish for what he was really trying to ask for.
Bid Fletcher a silent look of goodbye when he left for the night to care for Liathe.
A good while later, surprised when North suddenly got an idea of what he might have been asking for earlier. Too caught up in a weird sense of 'hope' to remember his fear of being selfish.
Through trial and error, the canine hit the nail on the head- both books to write and and books to read were wanted.
Surprised even more when North suggested he follow him on a little mission outside and stop by a book shop, as both Liathe and Fletcher had left for the night. Honestly hadn't thought about their absence and what that would mean for him which lead to a small realization. Lonely as he'd felt curled up on the graves since his parents were slain, he really hadn't been alone since then at all.
Which brought the question 'why', which was a constant in his mind. And not a suspicious 'why', or a sad 'why', just a why. Wanted answers for actions- why people cared or why they killed. Curious about the differences in minds and why people do what they do- just as curious about why he hasn't been able to open his mouth since the death of his parents without feeling a stab of terror.
Somewhere deep down, wonders why the 'why's matter so much now- but not so curious about that. Thinks little of his own mind more about others.
AND.. the why's where why books were needed- not directly, but in part.
Nodded after a moment's consideration.
Told that as long as he had nothing to do, they could leave then.
insert joke about his only hobbies are crying about his dead parents
Left shortly after Anja's arrival- though he managed a small look of hello and goodbye before North scooped him up and whisked him away.
RIP fuckin north i know you're dying inside you regret it immediately
16.1.2017
Woke with a start, scattering the ashes he'd curled up in. Took a moment for the previous day to sink in when he'd spent years in a different reality- promptly panicked once it did, scrabbling the ashes back into the pit and packing them in.
Sore in a few spots from his weight resting on charred bones, rose stiffly and gently shook out his pelt. Not that it really.. helped considering the blood on his pelt soaked up the ashes he laid in and matted his fur.
Crawled out of the pit and set to nosing dirt into it. Afraid of the wind blowing his 'parents' away or someone digging around in there- not only that but has some awareness of a need to 'move on' and keeping the need to be strong and continue living for his parents even if the thought is unfathomable at the moment.
Though determined to get the job done and without any thought to ask anyone for help, did receive it from Liathe while North remained ever vigilant, allowing space and time. Gave no responses when the female suggested he get cleaned off, and didn't take his eyes off of the grave long enough to see her turn and try to lead him away. Hesitated even when she managed to get his attention and turned to North questioningly. Took his nod for what it was and followed Lia off.
Shuffled into the pond once it was within view, scrubbing at his fur no matter how little he wanted to actually do that, getting help from the other. Older than he may appear but still maintains a large respect for authority. Thinks that those older know better and doesn't expect to be steered wrong so 'no' isn't exactly an answer..
Even that aside, without his parents has on way of knowing how to live, other than instinct which might not really.. get him far tbh. Taught well, but as they hadn't planned on leaving him, hadn't actually been taught to live on his own.
Shed a few more tears when she spoke of his parents' bravery and his own but couldn't get any words out to thank her. Bumped his head against her shoulder before they returned to North, Yumi and Fletcher. Not used to the care of absolute strangers, but not opposed to it in any 'UR NOT MY PARENTS' ways as of now. Confused, but grateful for the help as hard as it is to show it.
Felt his stomach gurgle and growl but felt no actual hunger once settled in his spot.
Had a wolf pelt placed over him by Sophie, given some pureed peach by Anja. Took little notice of either, but did notice the hunger pains that set on him.
Rose eventually to wander off and begin to pick at dandelions.
Noticed Liathe was following him only when she approached with poppies, thinking he was gathering flowers for the grave.
Told of a place she knew that had plenty of flowers. Blinked once before catching the sight of the claws around her neck- ones he was familiar enough with, ones he hadn't stopped seeing for the last day or so. Shifted his eyes from the necklace to her eyes, showing nnnnnot much more than some form of fear. Compared his necklace, ones worn in memory of his parents to hers, one of their killer's claws- weirdly enough hadn't thought the beast dead before that but wondered of the significance if his adornments were those of love. Though she took it off moments later and brushed dirt over it.
NONETHELESS.. in a near automatic fashion, slipped around and found another dandelion to munch on despite the color draining from his pink tinted face and his stomach clenched. Nauseated still when Liathe brought him sun warmed dandelions to eat but swallowed those down too out of some... idk... respectful act even though his feels were all muddled.
Stood in place when she walked away and opened his mouth when North walked by distantly- not that he could make any sound come out, but some wordless plea to coax him over. Of course nobody can hear a sound that isn't made, so the shepherd continued on his way.
15.1.2017
Countdown.
Spent a calm morning with his parents- a little saddened to see their home had been taken over. Tough luck kid.. but.. things could be worse. Technically.
Found another spot- well, parents did. Carefree and taking it in stride.
Lives with the belief that everything you have and lose in life is easily replaced, so there's no point in sweating the small things.
Ushered into a dug out den by his mother when both her and pa became tense. Nothing came of it for a while- nearly dozed before thundering steps sounded and pa charged forward to meet a beast (Ioten) head on. Instinctively shrunk back in the den and shut his eyes to the scene, peeking once or twice when Liathe (maybe literally u kno) flew in to lend aid. Held in screams when bodies collided against the tree that suddenly felt brittle in comparison. Thought of bolting out in panic but logic outweighed instinct at that point- just.. stayed against the roots until things went quiet.
Slunk out to assess the damage but didn't want to look past the spatters of blood on the ground.
Either entirely unaware or blocking out the more severe injuries of his mother and ragged state of his father.
Blood lost, with some time can be regained. Knows that too.
A second attack had his faith wavering only slightly- more blood lost, more wounds to heal. At most, knows his parents will only need more time.
Unnerved by his mother moving to block him into the entrance. Took in the thick scent of blood but rested his face against her fur.
Anja's arrival brought some faith back. Listened to her help his parents, calm in the warmth of the den. But soon felt his grip on his mother loosen as she stood. Peeked his head out only to see Ioten barreling towards them.
Heard a sickening crunch, a splatter and a gurgle before her body slumped back down and blocked the entrance. Sat in the pitch black, chocking back sounds of terror while desperately prodding the body that blocked him in. Managed to whisper a call or two to her, but got no response. Old enough to know what it meant but young enough to have hope.
Grew uncomfortable, hot and sick as the den began to fill with blood. Yelped back at his father when he spoke final words to him, thinking he'd run off to fight again when he didn't answer. After a lengthy brawl and what seemed like longer silence, saw light again. Wrongly assumed his mother had moved to unblock him but looked up to find Fletcher nosing her body away to free him.
Crawled out over red stained fur, leaving a trail of sanguine and turned to see both parents shattered and without a doubt, gone.
Silent for all of a few seconds before exploding into a single, drawn out wail. Spent his tiny lungs and fell silent, blind to any presence around him while adults spoke.
Felt his heart thunder in his chest in a panic while adults (Arcturus, Lavinia, Gambit) arrived- not so much by their presence but the shrill woman's accusations and the words thrown about. Glad enough when they went off but didn't relax for long before Fletcher spoke softly about the need for action. Knew what death resulted in, knew his parents weren't 'there' anymore. Dimly dragged himself behind Fletcher while North orchestrated something. Said nothing to anything the stag said, did nothing in response to Sophie's offering of flowers and warmth.
Merely followed the two around and stared at grave stones when Fletcher suggested a resting place. Heard the crackle of fire and smelled burning fur- whipped around to see his parents bundled and lit up in flames.
Initially panicked and ran towards them but quickly stumbled to a stop and near silently wailed once again- more an airy, whispered keen- the realization of never seeing them again setting in rapidly as fur and flesh turned black.
Glossy eyed, watched the fire and felt the warmth even from a distance- the last he'd feel from them even if that warmth wasn't theirs to give.
When the fires died down and ashes and bones remained, watched North scoop a handful up and pour some into two trinkets he'd carved from bones from his mother and a tine from his father. Had them slipped over his neck, strung with leather straps and received words- with a similar push of his need to hold on for his parents and be strong, that Fletcher had given him- before the male brushed a palm over his head and slipped away.
Looked back at the pyre with misty eyes and stared into it for some time longer before slinking closer to the living.
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you thought you were going to have a nice new life
do you think i'm nice to my characters
14.1.2017
Entered the forest with his parents, joyful at the prospect of brand new things and a brand new home.
Played with both his parents and then was dragged on a mission to meet like 80% of the forest. Met some who seemed sleepy and some who were awake, and playful. (AND SO MANY OF SILV'S BECAUSE SOMEONE IS FUCKING CRUEL LAKSNLSAKNA!) Fletcher, Vid, Sloane.
Met North who was not happy to see the family it seemed, but offered him a bow anyway because just because ur a fuckface doesn't mean i am ok my parents raised me right.
A mini with beluga pelt.. that was rly sweet but player couldn't catch the picto. 3;
Liathe, who was VERY PLAYFUL. Tried not to become a tumbleweed and blow away because those wings. Enthralled with everyone he saw- bowed to them all even if they didn't bow back.
Met Liam and Sloane and Jack too. Bowed to all of them and almost exploded with excitement in getting close to Liam. Just jittered on the spot and BWAHA'd and tried to be friendly but the energy built up and he rocketed into the distance with parents.
Was given the responsibility to pick their new home and literally walked like 5 seconds away and was like 'THIS LMAO'. Satisfied with the spot on a hill- moreso when father said he'd see even more than he could see from their spot, tomorrow.
YOU DON'T KNOW THE HALF OF IT HAHA
(An experimental babe..! May or may not click but there's a specific thing i have in mind. tysm friends u kno why.. )
i'm sorry i have to spam the
sry sry i'm
sry
i'm sorry
AAAAAAA
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OH
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IIIIIIIIIIII
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
VOWELS
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sSAHHGHH
IIIIIIIuhaoh