Mister High and Mighty Part 4
August 10, 2010 - 2:53pm — Seele
Where did we end…
Where did we end in this story.
Perhaps.. Yes. I explained to you how I met her. The other doe.
And how I betrayed my beloved.
As twisted as it may have sounded.
I believe this story is twisted on purpose.
So your ears would understand. Since they would not understand if I would explain to you.
May I try, anyway?
I will tell you that, I love Taliene, and still do.
We shared a powerfull bond that’s not easy to break. Opposites.
She, a sweet, calm, motherly doe.
I, a selfish, rude, powerfull stag.
Perhaps such things aren’t meant to last.
A beautifull blue doe once told me, you cannot love two the same way.
Not even two lovers, for that matter.
Everyone is different. How could you even think you can love two the same way.
I believe you can love two at the same time. Though, this world does not allow you to stay with two, and that I perfectly understand. So one of them, one of them will not end up by my side as my lover.
Now, this all doesn’t make sense to you. You will think of me, as you did before, as selfish and rude. Someone who’s out to hurt. Who’s only out for his own benefits.
I won’t change that view.
I will simply continue to tell my story.
She and I. I was almost hypnotized by her.
When I could be with her, I would be..
“Sometimes, I get the feeling, I am the only doe you ever truly loved.”
Silence.
I didn’t reply.
Was that so?
And in confusion, the next day, I would tell her I loved her.
“No, you idiot! What we feel is not love, what we feel is lust. You don’t love me.”
“Why can’t I?”
“We both have mates, we both have our own lives. This simply a game to us.”
After that day, we split.
We went back to our past lives.
Perhaps thinking we could turn back time.
I could not. Every muscle in my body missed her. And as I saw her, I found she missed me, as well.
She told me she was pregnant.
And I was the father.
In the beginning, she allowed me to protect her. Keep her close.
But soon, she would leave.
She couldn’t give birth here. We both believed none of the residents would accept such a child.
I couldn’t be there at the birth.
I wouldn’t be able to see my child for a long time..
She resided not far from the forest, but certainly not close either. A pack of wolves was close, and because of that, I could not come near.
They accepted her, but not me.
I remember that being one of the most fearful times in my life.
She perhaps didn’t know, I was worried the wolves wouldn’t accept our child either.
And I wouldn’t be there to protect it.
I wasn’t able to do anything in that time. Just waiting.
I would try to pick up the pieces, see if I could go on as she raised our child, me unknowing. I prayed she’d return one day, and I could see the kid.
She did.
And I learned that, the 8th of January, she had given birth to our son.
Yes… Now you know.
The doe is Trees.
And has been, for a long time.
He carries her colours, my markings.
Since it was a boy, I was allowed to name him.
I didn’t know anything for a while.
But I believe he deserves it.
The boy was named Sonne. It means sun.
But, perhaps, you recognize this name as well.
As my former son’s name was Sonneillon.
And with that, I honour him.
A strong fawn. Large, active.
You may think even worse of me now. And I do not care. For I do not regret his birth. He is my son, and he will stay so in every way.
Perhaps you can imagine how much it pained me to see Trees take him away again.
“He can’t stay here. They can’t know.”
“Then where are you taking him.”
“To my family. I will go back to my family with him, raise him there.”
Trees her mate wasn’t allowed to know. He would leave her.
And so she left. And I would stay behind.
She returned, though. And sometimes I would see the boy. He grew fast, and I didn’t need to worry much about him. He had the kindest older brother that took care of him, as she would visit me.
Or visit her mate.
I was jealous. I wished I could fight for her...
I never believed he took good care of her. I would, damn I would.
But I do not have a saying in such. I can love her all I like, if she doesn't want to leave him, she won't.
Taliene noticed my behavior.
“What is wrong Gehirn?”
“What should be wrong.”
“You’re distant.”
And perhaps I knew I would hurt her. And perhaps I didn’t want to.
But I couldn’t keep lying..
I was proud of the boy. I didn’t want to keep him a secret. Still, I couldn’t break her heart that way. I figured, I would confess to my affair, not the boy. Not yet.
It was raining that day. Taliene had been sheltering in the old oak, I had been circling it.
I knew this day would come, but couldn’t we just suspend it a little bit more? Continue where we’re at? Leave it be?
Perhaps lying was what pained me most. And that had to stop.
Eventually, we approached. And I told her the truth.
She screamed. Charged at me. Her head hitting me in the chest, before she ran off.
We didn’t speak for the longest time.
Later that day, her brother came to attack me. I didn’t mind. I’d rather have him sharp his antlers on my sides as to get away unpunished. Though, my son. Taliene’s son. Came in to defend me.
He didn’t know, ofcourse.
When he learned, I wasn’t less of his father to him. He had been in the same situation.
Perhaps I am not sick after all.
I told Trees, as well, what had happened.
“Why did you tell her? Was it that hard to shut up?”
“I had to.”
“You didn’t. But guys always have to brag huh.”
She pushed me away. Almost pushed me over, and I believe that is not easy to do.
There, I decided to stay alone for a while. For as long as necessary. Until one would talk to me again.
My daughter learned. She forgave me as well.
Many deer questioned my actions. I was waiting, patiently. Perhaps Taliene would forgive me.
But we would never be capable of returning to how it was. I realized this.
I learned Trees told her about our son. I felt weak.
Why was I so afraid to do so myself? I guess Taliene didn’t really appreciate me not having such guts either.
Trees asked her to become Sonne’s godmother.
When I learned that, it confused me. But she was persistent in her choice. Though, I believe even now, we don’t know Taliene’s answer to it.
I think I smiled.
Trees tried to somehow, glue the relationship me and Taliene had. She felt guilty.
She shouldn’t have…
“I am an old stag compaired to you, aren’t I?”
“I am sure you are older as I am, but you shouldn’t worry about that. With age there comes strength, experience, and strong genes since you survived that long. Besides that, your health and personality matters more as simple years.”
“Good. That is one problem less then. You know.. I.. Haven’t been this happy in a long while..”
“I am glad to hear. But what other problems are there to go?”
“No, no, it’s all perfectly fine…”
You explained a story your father told you. The way your kind views love..
Favorites.
You have a favorite.
And I guess, that is what striked me most.
Even if you would leave him for me, I would not be alone.
She realized my doubt. She asked me to share my worries, but I did not.
I told her I needed time.
Time I took.
Time I took to explain where I am now.
But time does not sit still.
I need to decide.
And why, you ask, why is this choice not obvious to me?
Taliene does not want me back. And I wouldn’t want me back either, honestly. I have hurt her tremendously.
But I respect her. I respect her, I love her, and I hate to see her hurt. She has always loved me, never, ever brought pain upon me.
Perhaps that head butt maybe.
She carried my daughter, and together we raised a couple of adopted fawns as well.
And Trees. As I may have explained, I love her. She has carried my son, my pride. He’ll grow larger as his father I fear, heh.
We have a lot in common. Both free, both capable of taking care of ourselves. To defend ourselves.
She is also the first and only I believe, that ever controlled me. We are balanced.
She’s addicting.
But she will hurt me.
As much of a hypocrite I am, yes.
I am honestly terrified.
What do I need to do now…?
Sorry, it's long I see! I
Second picture is made by Nishi <3.. She helped me out a lot.
Now, for something completely different:
*Points at Sonnefawn* LOOK AT THE CUTE. JUST LOOK AT IT. Doesn't it make you want to forgive Gehirn? *Tomato'd* AAH!!
-SHOCKED BY THE TWIST- But
But really, beautiful writings <3
Poor guy, such a hole he dug
Hope things get better soon... <3
sdfjhsdfhj my heart's beating
Woah... poor guy ;__; *Sends
*Sends hugs* Ouchies, what a tough spot.
Good luck D8
wow.. that.. was awesome.
Wow, I love that story, and I
Ravey: Glad I suprised you
Glad I suprised you >8D XDD
Thank you dear <3
Vee:
Rofl, don't act like you feel pity *Slaps*
>8DDD
Dannii:
Aah I don't want to kill you D8
<3 *Snuggles back* Hi~
...
..ALRIGHT. I mean. K. Thanks for caring about my emo torn heart.
...8(
Ammy:
A guys life is so tough. *Shakes head*
XD
Kaoori:
Why thank you!<3
SnowSauria:
I'm glad you do, thanks! <3
Hosnap, Trees? I never
At least Gehirn finally got it off his chest &hearts
Aw, I knew that it was Trees
I like all, really. The pictures, the text... raaawr <3
Avatar by Awentia, signature by Wildflowerdeer
Trees was the "dark doe"?
So then that is who Sonne is. Huh...This must have been going on for quite a while.
It's a good story. I just wish I knew more about the characters involved..
I was almost crying.
I have realy no...comment for this.. ;;.. And the drawings are awesome ♥
..I hope Gehirn feels better soon, I'll comment more on msn LOOL
"Father..;____; *huggles*"