[=#9966cc]I haven't seen Bastilion in a while. I really wish he was around more often.
My feelings still confuse me. I have friends I've known longer, and some that I haven't seen in an even longer length of time... But I think about him the most.

When I woke up today, Steele was beside me. I greeted him. I haven't seen him in a while, either. But when I sensed Bastilion, I nearly forgot about Steele. I ran to greet Bastilion. He was by the ruins, with Darkweaver. Seeing Bastilion, I felt really happy. I wanted jump, to leap. But why? Why do I feel differently around him than I do with my other friends?

I was shocked when Darkweaver suddenly turned into a fawn. He seemed frightened. So I stood by him. But, Rev was there, too, and I still felt like I wanted to watch over him. I did, a little bit, but I was glad when Saosin arrived to be with him, allowing me to go back to Bast and Darkweaver without feeling guilty.

The crowd near the ruins got to be a bit too much. It seemed to bother Dark, even myself a little bit. I guess I'm still not quite over the melancholy I had been feeling before, as normally I enjoy being with large groups. So, I asked the others to follow me, deciding to go somewhere less crowded. I headed to the birch forest, as there usually aren't a lot of deer there.

We sat for a while. I felt compelled to move closer to Bastilion. I leaned against him. He felt so soft, and warm, and there was something...almost soothing...about the feeling of his side rising and falling with his breath.

Then, Darkweaver returned to his usual size and left. I was confused, but soon Bast lay down again and I went back to laying against him. I...I felt like I could stay there forever... There is just something...reassuring...about his presence. And...safe. And more than that... I just feel...happier. It was if everything that had happened recently simply dissolved away.

[=#9966cc]There have been so many deaths lately, it seems...
Tyerk...When? How? Why didn't I hear about it sooner? Why did no one tell me? Though I feel sad about every death I hear of, this is the first time it's been someone I actually knew.

I didn't know him very well, but I always liked him, and I hoped we could be friends. I'm certain we could have, with a little more time.

I remember that time in the playground... Thinking about it now brings tears... We were having fun. We played at "deer stacking". It didn't last long, but I enjoyed myself.

And now I can't believe he's gone... And, it's been a while, it seems. And I never knew about it. I had noticed I hadn't seen him around. But I didn't realize...

Then there's the stag that was called, I think, Wesker... I never met him. I may have seen him, but I'm not sure. They say...Darkweaver is...responsible... I didn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. But now...I know... And it has me very confused. I have seen Darkweaver fight others...in fact, now that I think of it, I think I have seen him fight Wesker... But I never thought... I understand why, but I think there could have been another way. Or, maybe that's just a desperate wish... Even the Priest said sometimes there is no other way. I'm just so confused... I can't be mad at Darkweaver, or disappointed, but I am saddened. I don't know what to think of all this.

Why these things have to happen, why anyone has to die, I will never understand. I used to think this place was a paradise...death isn't supposed to happen here. But, now I know better. In a paradise, there would be no fighting, no death, everyone would be happy. I only wish everyone could be happy. I wish I could help everyone, that I could make everyone happy. Once I thought I could, but now I realize it is impossible.

Or is it? Maybe there is still a way. I can't lose hope...

I've been wanting to post these and didn't get a chance to get around to it! So I've accumulated a lot of screenshots in the meantime. X3;

I can't remember which ones I've already posted, so there may be some repeats. ^^;

[=#993333]I find myself with a mother and a father. A family... A familiar feeling. I know I once had a family, before. Something...happened to them...I believe... It feels good to have one again.

Master Scape... Or, I should say, Father... I want to thank you for being there for me when I was new to this world, for teaching me, protecting me, while I struggled to make sense of everything around me. If not for you, I would still be afraid... Well, I admit my fears are not yet gone, but they are diminished. I even enjoy things now that I once feared. Also, I thank you for your patience, knowing it must not be easy for one with so much energy to wait for a fawn with a bad leg. You also showed me how to have fun.

And, of course, I cannot forget the one I now call Mother. Even yesterday, you comforted me. You helped me forget my worries.
Though I was not born in this forest, I could not have asked for better parents.

Although...some of this feels familiar... Clearly I have been influenced by those that taught me, but I think that there is more to it... It might have something to do with the feeling I have always had that I once lived elsewhere, even to adulthood, which would mean that I have essentially grown up twice, in which case I must have learned things the first time around as well. It is a strange thing to think of... I have heard of others having had past lives. Maybe it is the same for me.

Yusss, I've taken a lot of screenshots recently. |3
Obviously, this is going to be image heavy. Beware.

edit: Oops, I forgot a bunch. x.x *adds*

(there's some mention of violence here, but it's not really described)

[=#9966cc]I can't stand fighting...especially when my friends get involved... But when my friends fight each other...

I...don't know what to think anymore...

It had been a good day. The snow was beautiful, and those giant mushrooms...I've never seen anything like them before. I felt better than I had in a few days. I even played a little bit with Riptail and a couple other deer. But I had to rest. Being injured makes it hard for me to keep up that kind of activity for long. At some point, I ended up falling asleep.

When I woke up later on, I noticed two of my friends were in the forest. The Priest, who I hadn't seen in a long time and don't get to see very often, and Aegle. They were together. I was excited. I ran up to them, though I shouldn't have with my wounds, but I just couldn't help myself.

When they came into sight, I stopped dead in my tracks. I was shocked at what I saw. Antlers being lowered and hooves being raised. They were fighting...my friends... And it wasn't just a spar, like the one I witnessed between Virgil and Baal. This was the real thing...

The pain I felt inside was awful. Much worse than the physical wounds on my flanks and chest. I felt like my heart was going to break. I called out to them.

"Priest, Aegle, please, why are you fighting? Please stop!" I called, but they either didn't hear me or would not listen. I moved closer. "Please stop this!" Another deer, I think he is called Masque, stepped in front of me and tried to stop me from getting any closer. But I ignored him. I could not just stand by and watch as my friends hurt each other. I care too much for them to not at least try to do something.

I walked right past Masque, still calling out to my friends to stop. The Priest looked at me sadly and shook his head, and the fight continued.

Adding a new character.
-------------
So, I decided to just go ahead and start a new roleplay blog. Anyone can join in any time (although I would prefer if you ask first anyway). I don't have anything in particular in mind, and plots aren't really my thing. If you're cool with that, feel free to join!

My characters:

Amary -bio-
(For Amary: Anyone would be good, really, although in her current state, someone who isn't going to be bouncing around all over the place and won't be aggressive would be ideal.)

Melinoe -bio-
(For Melinoe: The best kinds of characters to interact with Melinoe are any spirits/ghosts, undead/zombies, demons, or characters with some kind of connection with spirits/the afterlife/etc. If you want someone who will clash with her, almost any other type of character would do, especially deer that are friendly, cheerful, or persistent)

Maera -bio-
(fantasy/humanoid bio)
-also, you may want to check out her reference, since the picture on her bio is no longer completely accurate
(For Maera: any fawn characters would be good, or someone who would fight or spar with her. Any demon-like or vampire character would automatically become an enemy.)

Oisín -bio-
(I decided to open Oisín up to everyone, though I'm not sure what to do with him, or what kinds of characters would be best to interact with him...just about anyone, I suppose, save those with skull masks/faces.)

It's that time again!
Some of these I may have already posted. I can't remember.
Also, these may not all be in order..

I have seen that stag before, but only now was I able to meet him properly. He is an interesting one. His appearance is quite unusual, but there is more. I could sense darkness in him, more than I have ever sensed in any one being before. But there was something underneath it. I could also sense that he, too, had some kind of connection with the spirits. Especially to one in particular. I think he must have sensed something of me, as well, as he seemed to know of my own connection.

He pointed out a particular grave to me. It was one that I have liked to lay on sometimes, as its size and shape are perfect for such. Now I know where the poppies I have sometimes seen there come from.

He explained to me the grave is that of his lost love. Normally I would scoff at such a thing. Love... What's the point? But his respect for the buried was not something I could scoff at.

A short time later, the very spirit of that same grave appeared before me. I have to admit I was surprised. Although I am able to sense and communicate with the spirits, I have never been able to actually see them. I did not think they could be seen. To be honest, I wasn't quite sure what to do. I did not want to simply linger around her or follow her around.

In any case, it was quite an interesting experience.

--------

So, Melinoe got to meet Darkweaver and Laghodessa.
She doesn't mention their names here, but I'm sure she knows them by now.

(sorry for the bump, had to fix a typo x.x)

I noticed that after seeing...um, a certain friend...the other day...the next day I felt kind of disappointed, in a way, that he wasn't around.

And, when I did see him, I felt...well, maybe "excited" isn't the right word... I'm always excited to see my friends. Especially ones I haven't seen in a while. But this was...different...somehow... I mean, it's true, I hadn't seen him in a little while, but...well, he wasn't the only one that I saw that day that I hadn't seen in a while. But... Oh, I don't know, I really don't know how to describe it, or... I just don't know how to put my thoughts, or feelings, or whatever, into words...

I have other friends I've known longer...

Speaking of which, I've been missing Skeevah. I haven't seen him in a long time. I have met his sister, though, and she's fun, though I still don't know her very well.

Well, anyway...
I guess I'm just kinda confused. I mean, I'm not sure...why anything should be different... And...well...I guess, really, there isn't really anything different. It's just... Oh, I don't know, I don't think I'm even making any sense.
It's nothing, really...
Except...
That wasn't the first time...
I don't know what else to say, I guess I was writing this to try to get my thoughts together, but I just...don't...know...

I guess I'm just thinking too much. All I'm doing is confusing myself. I'll just have to forget it, I guess.

~Amary~

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Okay, I should not be up still...But I wanted to get this written, because if I had waited I would have probably forgotten.
Anyway, just a little drabble, nothing special.
Hmmm..... What do you suppose is going on here? ;3