i hear the sound of my alarm in my dream and i wake just in time for it to go off 5:30 am its still dark my joints click as i move and crane my neck and think to myself please god just put me back to bed as i dream for a snow day that will never happen and for something amazing
something amazing...
what is it.. what is it...
my thoughts are rapid i type into this furiously trying to grasp every thought please god just -
i am porcelain white under the dim glow of bathroom light my lips blend, lines indistinct except for the rings around my eyes
embedded

i think nothing of myself, to myself as i brush my teeth trying to cage the flood
before i fucking overflow before i fucking explode i see visions of myself screaming as you talk to me my mind is somewhere far, take me somewhere far beyond this

but none of this actually happens because im sitting there, but im not actually there, not actually here

not really listening to you talk