I guess I should explain why some of my commissions are taking so long. For the most part between the Holiday's and... personal issues I've been fairly busy. I do have a lot of sketches to finish, to get done and the like and several have very rough outlines done but I've just... I've been feeling under the weather lately.

As everyone knows, I am suffering due to not having a job. I lost my old job back at Wal-Mart on August 4th 2010... and have been without it ever since. When I was first terminated I did try to get on Unemployment but was denied due to "I knew the rules of my job when I accepted it..." and therefore was denied. Applying to every job within a some odd mile radius of my home has gone poorly as well. I have received calls from Pizza Hut to answer questions, the people stating that they will 'call back' to set up an interview but it's been 2 or 3 months since then. Therefore, I doubt I'm getting that interview anytime soon. I have exhausted myself filling out applications, I have exhausted myself going out and TALKING to people asking if they were hiring and I have exhausted myself in everything else.

My mom has bitched at me to look into schools for Graphic arts and the like, when I have done that she bitched at me about things and that's when I ended up suffering a depression breakdown where I cried for most of the day and just felt lethargic and well in general I felt like just giving up. This has been a common thing that has been happening since August since we've gotten our gas turned off. And the situation has steadily gotten worse since then.

I thank everyone who HAS commissioned me, you all mean a lot to me you really do. The money I have earned from my commissions has gone towards getting some extra heat into the house but the issue lies in that now we are getting hounded for costing too much in Electricity. I know my grandmother is trying her best, but I also know for a fact that she should have more than enough money to cover at least for the Electricity and Water. But, apparently not...

Today, I suffered from another depression breakdown. This time, a big one... a very big one... one in which I have considered things I never should consider. This breakdown was brought up by my mothers constant hammering over the past week, where she has been demanding I go down to my grandmothers and get the gas turned back on (Despite knowing that it likely won't do anything for us), because apparently I am required to do this now. Given the fact that I have a credit card dept in my name, dealing with this would just worsen things for me. And then she has gone into bitching me out once again calling me a lazy good for nothing stating that I would rather have someone else do it for me. And then she has now threatened to have our water turned off... which means we won't be able to wash dishes, etc. I WILL be going down to my grandmothers to do things about the gas but I'm certain if we cannot pay, we won't get it back on.

So yes, in short I am working on commissions... but at this point I do not know when they will be done... I am hoping to get all of them done by December before Christmas though. If I can get back up from this breakdown and all of this shit in my life right now...