Today was eventful, if you want to call it that.
Earlier in the day, I found my Rev in the forest. He insisted on dancing, so we called for more deer(only one or two came) and wiggled around a little. He grew tired.. and I began to worry about that foot of his- I hope he can hold out..
While he rested, I guarded him from anyone and everyone, waving my rack even at one of the deer we danced with. I don't know what's come over me lately.. I'm not normally this aggressive. No, I'm never aggressive..
Maybe it's all for him? Maybe it's hormones.. ? I don't.. know..
When he stood, I tried to lead him to the pond, but he tired rather quickly. It was a long struggle and we barely made it half way.. I know he's in pain, but I have to get him to the cleansing waters of the pond. He vanished for the evening. I hope he's at least at ease..
I don't quite remember when, but I know I visited the pond to greet Saosin. Aside from Rev and Balkis, he's the only other deer I feel tied to emotionally in the forest. When I arrived, a doe he was with made a threat, and even he stood to taunt. I quickly retreated..
I found them again, later, and hoped to make truce, but after being unnoticed, bowed and left once more. The rest of my evening was spent wandering, looking for somewhere to rest my anxiety.. but loneliness kept drawing me back to the couple and each time, something pushed me away.
The doe left and I sought Saosin one more time, really not wanting to be a bother to the pair, but once I found him, he vanished..
I don't think I've ever felt so drained and alone. Maybe tomorrow will be better..
Until then, I think I'll bed down on my moss patch..
Tyerk.