On behalf of all our sponsors I must welcome you Which I do -- there's a catch
August 17, 2011 - 5:23am — Mr.Sanguine
I don't care if you're a champion
No one messes with me
I am ruthless in upholding
What I know is right
Black or white -- as you'll see
I'm on the case
Can't be fooled
Any objection
Is overruled
Yes I'm the Arbiter and I know best
[CHORUS]
He's impartial, don't push him, he's unimpressed
[ARBITER]
You got your tricks
Good for you
But there's no gambit I don't see through
Oh I'm the Arbiter I know the score
[CHORUS]
From square one he'll be watching all 64
[MERCHANDISERS]
Whether you are pro or anti
Or could not care less
We are here to tell you
We are here to sell you chess
Not a chance of you escaping from our wiles
We've locked the doors, we've blocked the aisles
We've a franchise worth exploiting
And we will -- yes we will!
When it comes to merchandising
We could kill
When you get up --
When you get up in the morning
Till you crash at night
You will have to live your life
With bishop, rook and knight
Clean your teeth with chequered toothpaste
Wear our vests
Our kings and queens on bouncing breasts
You could even buy a set
And learn to play
We don't mind we'll sell you something
Anyway
[ARBITER]
I'm on the case, can't be fooled
Any objection is overruled
Don't try to tempt me -- you've no hope
I don't like women, I don't take dope
I'm the Arbiter I know the score
[CHORUS]
From square one he'll be watching all 64
[ARBITER]
You got your tricks -- good for you
But there is no gambit I don't see through
I'm the Arbiter and I know best
[CHORUS]
He's impartial don't push him he's unimpressed
[ARBITER]
I'm the Arbiter my word is law
[CHORUS]
From square one he'll be watching you...
[EVERYONE]
Don't you find it rather touching to behold
The game that came in from the cold
Seen for what it is -- religion plus finesse
Countries, classes, creeds, as one in
Love of chess
- -'Opening Ceremony' from the musical 'Chess'
