Days had passed since the nightmare yet it still hung on Cloud’s mind like a weight. He wondered what the dream had meant; he hadn’t ever had a dream like it before or since. Maybe it’d just been another nightmare, nothing more and nothing less? Maybe he was just overreacting?
Cloud shook his head and tried to concentrate on where he was going, not that he ever paid much attention anymore. Nowadays, he always felt like he was going in circles. His direction in life was lost...and he could not find it. It was as if he was trapped with no way out.
There are ways, His inner voice muttered, there are many ways.
It was then that he realized he was standing on cold, hard stone.
He stood at the edge of the precipice again, looking out across the forest from the top of the tallest boulder of the playground. Cloud backed away from the edge as before. He wanted to run, to get away from this place, but he stayed rooted to the spot. His heart beat furiously in his ears, drowning out all other noise.
Jump, His inner voice whispered poisonously, it will all be over and you will be free.
Cloud laid his ears back. “No…”
What do you have to lose? What do you have to live for?
Cloud took a breath. “Nothing,” He replied, his voice sounded dead and cold, “Nothing at all.” He stepped back and raised his head, “But I won’t jump.”
There is no stopping the inevitable. You want to jump.
“I. Will not. Jump,” Cloud repeated, biting off each word with defiance.
You cannot change fate.
Suddenly, a flurry of birds rose from the forest floor right in front of the buck and took flight with a great commotion. Startled by the sudden movement and noise, Cloud reared up with a frightened bellow. As he came back down, a large portion of rock came loose beneath his hoof and threw him off balance. Next thing he knew, he was falling.
He came crashing down sideways onto a large rock and several ribs cracked upon impact, sending hot stabs of pain through Cloud’s side. The momentum of the fall and the impact sent him rolling over and over down the hill. Suddenly, stars exploded before Cloud’s eyes as his head came into contact with another rock. A tine from one of his antlers snapped clean off and fell gracelessly to the forest floor a little ways away.
The gray buck, realizing he had stopped moving, stumbled to his hooves. Adrenaline fueled terror screamed at him to run and run he tried. He took one step but only one. His right front leg crumpled uselessly beneath him, burning with pain, and he collapsed.
You cannot change fate.
The world went dark.
~~~
Cloud was surrounded by light and warmth. He got to his feet cautiously but found that there was no pain anymore. He looked all around but saw nothing but a flat, white expanse that seemed to go on for miles. There was not a soul around, he was alone.
“Am I dead?” He wondered out loud.
“Not quite,” A voice said behind him, “You’re still barely alive.”
Cloud recognized the voice. He turned around slowly and came face to face with a familiar whitetail buck. “Sky,” Cloud breathed.
His younger brother had not changed since he had last seen him, which seemed like years ago. His smile was still the same, warm and mischievous, and his eyes were still the same light blue that they always had been. The only difference was that he was partly transparent, a ghost.
“Hello, big brother,” Sky replied warmly.
All at once, a million and one emotions flooded through Cloud. Sadness, elation, love…guilt. “Are you here to welcome me?” He finally managed to choke out.
“Wrong again,” Sky said, “I was sent to offer you a choice.”
“I can imagine what it is,” Cloud muttered with an edge of bitterness.
The ghostly whitetail nodded, “You can choose to go back and live or,” He paused, “You can choose death and leave everything behind.”
“I choose death,” Cloud said with no hesitation.
Sky looked shocked and saddened. “You would give up life so easily?”
“Yes.”
“You would leave everything behind? Your friends? Your home?”
Cloud hesitated. He thought of all his friends, many he had not seen in a long time. He wondered how long it would take them to find his body. Wondered how long they would mourn, how long before they went back to their usual routines, how long before they forgot.
“They’ll just forget,” Cloud said bitterly.
“Are you so sure?”
~~~
Deer of the forest, hear my plea.
Help my brother. Show him you care. Your words will not go unheard; your actions will not go unnoticed. Give him a reason to live. Save him.
Please.