Amadahy

Jealousy creeps into my heart like a snake. It wraps around it and constricts. I watch everyone.
I watch who I used to consider my friends.
I watch them find each other, fall in love, and leave me behind.
Even if I was falling for them, I don’t have a chance any longer.
I secretly curse the ones who took them from me, secretly send glares and venom in their direction. They won’t know, because I’m a coward, right? Maybe someday they will. Ha.
Yesterday…
Well…
Where to begin…?

I suppose the first thing I remember is seeing a strange deer with the set of Kaoori’s mate, yet a different picto.
He was staring at me, straight into me. He didn’t really react too much…Just stared. I started to get a little nervous then.
Then Kaoori came. She seemed confused too, so we both went to check him out. He was so strange…After staring at him for a bit, he left, and we followed him.
He turned around and came to sniff me.
He unnerved me too much, so I took off. He was still in the area though and I have to admit that I was a bit…interested. I watched him a bit longer, but nothing else happened.
…Hm.

Maybe it was then that I first saw Furfur’s picto or…something so close to it. I…don’t really know. I followed it only to find some sort of doe with a crying mask.
…I don’t know if I’ve been hallucinating or what. I didn’t eat too many mushrooms or anything…haha…

Throughout the whole day, I kept seeing pictos like Furfur’s. Each time, I’d be so hopeful that it was him, that maybe he was back…Each time I’d look for him, and find some other deer in his place.
It was then that I realized…that he’s gone. He’s gone forever, he’s not coming back. So I gave up, closed my eyes, and tried to let him go.
I couldn’t. Somehow, I still hope he’ll be back some day.

I had been yelling at this one spot and hoping that deer would come back, still thinking it was Furfur, when a tiny little stag came up to me. He wondered what I was doing, but I didn’t want to talk to anyone or see anyone right then.
So I ran. Typical for me, isn’t it?
The little stag followed. I studied him from afar. He was a tiny blue thing, with poppies in his antlers and that beautiful mask that whistles. He was very polite in coming up to me, probably thinking I was some timid little thing.
Then again, I can’t deny that I am at times.
At first, when he came closer and started hopping around me, I felt like giving him the cold shoulder. Couldn’t he see I wasn’t interested in playing?
However…After awhile, it was just too much to resist. I joined him, running out all the anger, the jealousy, every emotion.

After awhile, I was exhausted. I think he was too, so he motioned for me to sit by a tree with him. He told me his name was Iskalo, and he was a bit new here.
“Amadahy is my name, but call me Ama. It’s…thanks for sitting with me,” I said. I fell asleep by him and woke up some time later. The forest was a bit louder. So many deer that I knew happened to be around!

First I ran around with Nine. I swear, that kid never tires. Even after I was done chasing him, he was still up and snuggling Dhudwa. Heh. I was really glad for him, though; he cheered me up so much. Somehow, I think he has that effect on most deer.

After chasing another not-Furfur pictogram, little Tally found me. We ran around for a little while too. I don’t know why everybody was so happy yesterday. It was a nice diversion, though.
After Tally came Jester. He is quite the dancer…or spazz. Actually, he’s a bit of both, but jumping and dancing with him, Amazon, Tally, and Burrow sure was fun. He ran us all over the place—I suppose he just can’t sit still! I look forward to meeting the flamboyant performer again.

After that, I fell asleep right on the rocks of the playground. While I slept, I dreamed…I dreamed of Basil, and of Furfur. Instead of Furfur saving me from Basil, Basil was saving me from Furfur. In the middle of the fight, Furfur suddenly looked at me and then disappeared.
Then Basil followed him, and I was alone in the darkness.

I half woke up, suddenly realizing that I was warm. Iskalo was curled around me. I snuggled closer to him, vaguely hearing hoofbeats.
Something heavy and large was coming up the playground rocks. I turned my head and blearily opened my eyes to see a giant creature looming over Iskalo and me. I jolted awake instantly when he showed his antlers at us.
“Don’t you dare hurt him, you beast!” I tried hitting and headbutting him away from my friend, standing over Iskalo to protect him. It almost looked as though Ren was trying to eat him. He just laughed when I tried to fight him off, obviously very amused at such a small creature trying to get him away. I caught sight of his picto then.

Ren.
It was Ren, the werewolf.
And I had just chosen to pick a fight with him.

Iskalo woke up, and I told him to run. Together, we fled the werewolf…who followed me.
How can I describe the blind panic? My heart was racing, my vision narrowed to just a tunnel. I knew the only thing I could do was run from him.
After a while, he was still following. I turned around to face him.

“Go away!” I yelled at him, but again he just laughed, especially when I tried to hit him with my hooves.

Run, run, run. The forest was blurring out under me as I ran through it, just trying to get away from that monster, and get Iskalo away too.
Trees, grass, everything looks the same after awhile. I tried different ways of escaping, even thought of diving into the pond. In the end, I went to the Idols for help.
But they didn’t come. I pressed against them for safety as the werewolf approached and laughed…then left.

Iskalo was still there, and I collapsed against him, shivering. He was warm…and then he was gone.
And Ren was back, staring at me.
He laughed when I cowered away from him, and then ran off.
I unsteadily walked to the Ruins, where I collapsed by some friends. The darkness this time was welcoming.

I’m not sure who I can trust anymore…Perhaps nobody? Maybe, then, it's time for me to start getting up on my own feet...if I don't fall down further first.

[Ama's going to be rather antisocial and skittish for a bit. Also, as a note, I'm fine with Ren doing this. ^^]
[Featured: Iskalo, deer with picto close to Furfur's, Nine, Tally, Ren, Basil, Furfur.]