Amor ordinem nescit [Furfur Diary 4]

Alecsander's picture
"Amor ordinem nescit...love certainly does not know order.."

Furfur sighed and laid down within the old oak tree. He had spent another day wandering with friends and helping an old companion gain suitable attire for the forest. He was such a vibrant individual before but now only sat beside him in silence. Furfur paced nervously and hung his grinning mask up to dry on a splintered section of the interior. He was far more troubled than previous nights and this was turning out to be no exception. There were so many uncertainties and worries lately that he could not logically consider. He remained restless and distant from those whose companionship he never once left.

"A Penny for your thoughts?”

"I.."Furfur faltered. How could he summarize his worries in a few mere sentences? He continued to pace circles around Rhys deep in thought. This persistent habit continued until Rhys laboriously climbed to his feet and gave his companion a weary smile.

"Well how about let’s start with basics: What is her name? ”

"Well her name i-wait! What?! Who said anything about a her. You’re wrong. I don’t know what you’re talking about I was just trying to think of what mask to wear Tomo-"He reared up and danced in place in agitation. How did he know!? The cheeky little gold masked weirdo always seemed to know things about him he held secret.

"Do not start with me child. You wear the same mask every day. Do you know how much effort it took to even stand and put up with your silly charade? You’re worrying about a girl. A doe. A woman. A female. Now get to the point. What, think you’re not good enough?”

”I..I don’t want to name names. You know how the forest is. One conversation gets overheard and BAM! Rumors everywhere. Just..generals. Yes, it’s a doe and I don’t know about this whole mate..thing."

”What is not to know? You get with a cow, shack up, run around the forest together and maybe pop out a few fawns. It’s not overly complicated.”

Rhys flopped back down in the dust and rolled on his side. This conversation was most definitely not worth getting up for and it sounded like it was going to be a long one.

Furfur sighed and laid back down against the larger bull, resting his head on his back and gently nuzzling him. ”I..it’s all of it. I mean first of all, I’m dead. What female in her right mind would want to be with a male she can never really touch? It just seems..odd. How could I know the affection is genuine? What if she were to take my lack of touch as cold rejection? It is tiresome.
Then there is the whole fawn issue. I have one from another female and I do not know how she would feel about such a thing. Would she adopt him, or want her own one day? I cannot provide such a thing and the thought of depriving her of the joy of motherhood seems a horrible punishment for the one I adore.

And then..the whole idea of it. I have seen those couples around the forest. They’re in their own little world and refuse to leave it. They sit together, play together, eat, sleep, drink, everything together! Where is the room for friends in such a partnership? How could I so selfishly take my doe from her friends without a care in the world? How could I deprive the rest of the community the pleasure of playing with the sweetest most beautiful doe to ever grace the forest with her presence?

I-I suppose they’re selfish small worries but the thought of making that leap is always on my mind. What if another male also wishes for my female and attacks? How could I properly defend her with no antlers? What if it were a close stage and our relationship is the breaking point? How can I bear the responsibility of my own selfish desires? How can any stag for that matter? A bolder more rash bull than I could only go through with such actions without properly weighing all of the cons..I need to think more on this.
Could you offer any words of advice to ease my suffering Rhys…?
.
.
...
Rhys?”

He raised his head and gently nudged his speckled pillow, only being met with an annoyed grunt followed by rhythmic snoring.

Typical. The oaf bothers him to spill his heart out and then gets bored to death of the conversation.

He laid back down his head and sighed. He could not deny that he was relieved to empty his mind of the troubles, but he could not shake the feeling that he needed direction and advice. This was not a decision to be made lightly and would take some time. He nestles closer for warmth and closed his eyes, banishing the worrisome thoughts for another day.

_____________________________________________________________________

Amor ordinem nescit means Love knows no order.

Featuring:
Dewydd Rhys being his lazy self.

Also a doe who Furfur has fallen for.
Feel free to speculate if you wish.
ocean's picture

"Hey, Furfur, cheer up. Don't

"Hey, Furfur, cheer up. Don't worry too much, you hear? Things will happen as they will, my friend." Ama smiles.

Also, awww. <3
Kita?
Alecsander's picture

"I suppose. It is so easy to

"I suppose. It is so easy to so frivolously say from an outsider's standpoint but now that I find myself ensnared..it is not a pleasant situation to say the least. I find myself lacking the patience that I am so well known for. " He gave a weak smile back and kept his head tucked deeply into the sleeping Rhys' back. He was not expecting visitors and his mask was still far across the room. He was so shy of his real appearance.
ocean's picture

"Ah, Furfur. That's true,

"Ah, Furfur. That's true, true. I can't say I know. I just don't want you to worry too much; you'll wear yourself down. Love's a funny thing, isn't it?" Ama picks up the mask, noting his discomfort, and brings it over.
"Sorry about just, you know, bursting in on you. And..."spying" on you. I just...felt bad. You want me to leave?" She looks towards the Old Oak's opening.
Alecsander's picture

He slipped on the mask and

He slipped on the mask and lazily put his front legs through Rhys' body. "mmm, no it's fine. I just was not expecting any visitors. A bit foolish considering where I live. I can't say I understand it too much myself, but I need her to help keep myself sane and break up the monotony of the after-life."
He shook his head and gave a hollow chuckle.
"I apologize for being a bit depressing lately, I can't help it. Huge waves of emotion get to me like this sometimes. You are free to stay as long as you wish, just be aware that Rhys rolls around quite often in his sleep and he could crush you to death with his bulk if you are not careful."
ocean's picture

A wry smile crosses Ama's

A wry smile crosses Ama's face. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't depressing lately as well." She examines the legs going through Rhys's body with a mixture of curiosity and humor. Strange that she wasn't afraid of him; perhaps it was simply that he was so nice to her.
"Must be interesting being able to do that. Different, at least. Waves of emotion...indeed."
She laughs lightly, turning to glance at Rhys. "I'll stay aware of that."
Alecsander's picture

"Do what now?" He followed

"Do what now?" He followed her gaze to his front legs and blinked a few times under the mask. "Oh..er..quite." he concentrated and held his legs above so they appeared to be resting on the back of his companion. It took much effort to pretend to be normal at times and it was not normally so comfortable. "It really is no different. It's just like you walking through a clear field. I don't feel anything special at all unless I bump my mask or antlers on something."
ocean's picture

Ama watches his legs. "No,

Ama watches his legs. "No, you can leave them like that. That's actually kinda cool...The whole "goes through solid objects" things. At least to me." She smiles. "So...you can feel rain, wind, everything?" She looks curious, but her face suddenly falls. "...Sorry about the stupid questions. Curiosity getting the best of me. I suppose I've just always had an interest in..." She blushes slightly and turns away.
Zeekii's picture

Poor Furfur, I hope that he

Poor Furfur, I hope that he feels better soon~
(You write well, I enjoyed reading this ^^)
KittyCatKita's picture

A white doe bounces past,

A white doe bounces past, freezes and backs up looking toward the large tree, "Party in the old oak?" Kita bounds over, chuckling "Hey Furfur! Hey sleepy Rhys....oh he actually is sleeping" She laughs and looks toward the other doe "Hi I'm Kita" she turns her gaze back toward the two stags "So what's going on...someone's birthday?" She looks between them confused, tail flicking happily.

-totally came in after all those posts so I'm saying she missed the above conversationg xD-

~~~~

This is beautifully written!!! I feel bad for Furfur! *hugs*
More!! -pokes- ^-^
Alecsander's picture

He sat up hearing the

He sat up hearing the approaching hooves of another and stood protectively ontop of his doughy companion. "It is fine. I suppose I am one of the only friendly sources of information about the ah..afterlife. No, I cannot feel wind, rain, or anything else other than pressure change and temperature of my forest magic antlers and mask. Sometimes it is a blessing but usually more annoying. "

He glanced up as kita approached and blushed deeply under the mask. He always seemed to be quite popular with the does of the forest. He probably should try harder to make friends with stags in the future least he be accused of having a harem.

"Not really Kita. I am sure we could celebrate Rhys' birthday if we wanted, but he is not awake and would probably not even get up for it. I was just conversing with him before he started the snorefest and the sound probably drew Ama over to find out why there was a lion in the forest. It's rather warm in here comparatively so I was taking the change to peel my mask off my face before it froze on. "
KittyCatKita's picture

"Hmmmmmm" She tilts her head

"Hmmmmmm" She tilts her head to the side watching him before laughing "Well yes I suppose that would be a good thing now wouldn't it? If it did freeze there we would have to wait till the spring thaw." She moves into the old oak also, nodding pleased at the warmth inside. "What were you guys talking about?" she asks as she began turning in circles, softening the ground before laying down near the two stags
ocean's picture

Ama tilts her head. "It seems

Ama tilts her head. "It seems like it would be..." She looks up at the arrival and greets her with a nod, too lazy to stand at the moment. "Nice to meet you, Kita. I'm Ama. I've heard-" Her eyes go wide in a flash of alarm and she cuts herself off. She chuckles.
"Er...Never mind. So, Furfur...what were we talking about again?" Her eyes flash with mischief.

[The rest of that sentence was "I've heard so much about you". It's not from a deer source, don't worry! xD]
Alecsander's picture

Furfur gave Ama a 'don't you

Furfur gave Ama a 'don't you dare' look and glowered underneath the mask. "You mean other than the loud beast we're sharing a room with and how cold it is? I can't seem to recall. I have such a poor memory lately.." It was clearly a lie, but Ama would take too much glee in embarrassing him in front of Kita. He tried to steer the conversation away from his relationship woes and nestled up against Kita's side to help protect her in case Rhys decided to roll over.
ocean's picture

Ama grins. "Should I remind

Ama grins. "Should I remind you, Furfur?" She laughs, then winks. "Alright, Furfur, I won't. You really do take things too seriously!" She glances over at him, wondering if he'd feel cold like other ghosts.
Not that she knew any others.
KittyCatKita's picture

Kita looked between them

Kita looked between them confused, smiling softly "Um well alright, it is cold out, I wonder if the snow will stay this time or if it will just fall." She glanced over at Furfur and chuckled, nuzzling his side softly "It's better than rain I suppose"
Serenai's picture

I love your writing. This

I love your writing. This actually made me laugh, how cute he's being. xD Atvana watched the whole time~ xD
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