The rain fell down heavily onto the earth. It was a cold, fall rain; each droplet felt as if it were ice as it landed upon his soaked body. Paavo quickened his pace as the sight of the Old Oak came into view over the horizon. [=#EDC393]Almost there...[/center] he encouraged himself as he approached his destination. Skidding to a halt, his hooves dug into the soft dirt, covering his front legs with mud. He panted as he slowly entered the nook in the tree and sat down in the soft grass. He gazed out into the gloomy world but for him, it seemed a bit gloomier.

"The rain is fitting for today. Isn't it Usko?" Paavo said out loud even though no one was there.

He watched as the rain continued to trickle down from the heavens. Off in the distance, he watched other deer run and gallop with each other. Their laughter muffed by the soft sound of the rain but their smiles had not faded. He let out a heavy sigh as he watched other deer walk close to each other or nuzzle.

"Must be nice..." he said to himself. "Don't you think so, Usko?"

His heart felt heavy in his chest as he lowered his head, snuggling closely to himself for warmth. His courtships had been failures; the only one who even slightly noticed him was now taken. I'm so foolish... he thought as flash backs of his attempts to impress those around him came to him. The waltz...The poses...Pointless...

Out of the misty air, a figure approached the tree. Kumiko came into view as she drew closer; the rain running off of her long, black beaked mask and her fur was matted down from the rain. "Oh, Paavo..." she said in a soft, nurturing voice, "I just heard the news. The Forest whispers about it. Are you...ok?"

Paavo lifted his head, "Yeah...I suppose..."

Kumiko stepped under the tree and laid by his side. "Want to talk about it?"

He shrugged, "I don't know...I mean...Yeah, I did care for her but I don't think it was really true, but this is still hard to swallow..."

She nodded, "I tried telling you that you were rushing into things."

"I know but..."

"Paavo, there is such as thing has loving someone without loving them."

He cocked his head to the side, "What do you mean?"

Kumiko grew quiet as she looked out into the rain, "Sometime ago, I was in a situation similar to yours. There was stag whom I cared greatly for. I longed to see him and to be with him; he brought me much happiness. We were close but it wasn't exactly love. It was very hard for me to watch him go, but...Time heals all wounds."

Paavo let out a sigh as her words dwelled in him, "So, you're saying that my situation could be like yours? Where I can care for her but not really be in love with her?"

"Yes, and maybe that's why it's hard for you," she nodded, "It's hard for you to accept this because she was special to you, but not special enough. So now you're feeling empty because you have no one while she and her chosen have each other; you feel like an outcast."

His eyes were wide. He smirked a bit as he glanced away, "Lady Kumiko, you read me well." His smirked disappeared, "But I'm scared that I might cause tension now. I guess I feel...guilty for feeling this way about her."

Kumiko shook her head, "You shouldn't feel guilty for believing that something could happen, but I would advise you to not dwell on what could have been. That's the mistake I made...I didn't accept that I couldn't change things."

"I don't think I want to change things," Paavo stood up and stretched. "He was there for her when I wasn't, why...I wasn't even here to welcome her when she blossomed into the doe she is now. He, however, grew with her. I made the mistake of not being here...And now they have a bond that I do not want to be broken and they're my friends. I want them to be happy and if they're happy together, then I don't want to change that. I just hope he knows how lucky he is and I hope...I hope he treats her well. I hope for the best for them both."

Kumiko stood up with him, "I'm sure he will and I'm sure they both won't be hard on you for feeling this way." She smiled at him, "You're quite mature for such a young stag. Most stags your age would be furious, but you seem...Alright with their decision in life."

"Why wouldn't I be alright with it?" He walked around a bit. "I'm sore...but I think it's because I have no one while they have each other. The least I can do is be happy for them and be glad that my friends aren't in the trouble my heart is."

Kumiko gently nuzzled him, "I'm sure you'll find someone."

A faint smile braced his lips as he watched Kumiko step out into the rain. She shot him an encouraging smile as she disappeared into the approaching darkness. He sighed one last time as he laid down again and drifted into a dreamless sleep.






The air was cool and thin as Paavo's slowly stood up, shaking the early morning frost from his fur. The tiny icicles clung tightly to each strain making each majestic movement glitter in the setting moonlight that illuminated the still Forest. The sun had not yet risen leaving many of the inhabitants in their silent slumbers. The cold October air cut through him as he stepped out from the cover of the Old Oak. It's thick bark provided decent cover from night's icy grip, but he became vulnerable.

He quickened his pace in hopes of raising his body temperature. Each breath was a white, transparent wisp that escaped from his mouth as he took heavy steps. Tottering as quickly as he could, Paavo hurried to the edge of the pond. He carefully stepped into the water; the icy liquid wrapped around his legs. He lowered his head and began to sip the water. Its chill ran down his throat sending shivers down his back. Once his thirst was satisfied, he pulled his head up. A few droplets ran down his chin and dripped from this drenched goatee. The tiny plop from each droplet echoed. The cold air had sent the frogs and crickets into their burrows for the night, leaving the pond free from their nightly songs. The ripples on the surface cut through the mirrored reflections.

With a might leap, he jumped out from the pond and onto the cool ground. He took a few heavy stomps to shake off the water from his feet before gazing up at the heavens. High above him, millions of tiny white stars twinkled on the black canvas sky. The night was crystal clear, making each star shine more brightly. Unexpectedly, a fast white strip wiped across the sky.

"Did you see that, Usko?" He said in a fairly deep voice with a Finnish accent. His ears were pointed up as he gazed up at the sky and nodded to a reply from no one. "Yes, I remember what Lady Kumiko had said. Do you remember that wish we had made that night?" He paused again, "Yes, I suppose it did come true. Lady Kumiko does smile now but...It happened in a way I did not wish for it to happen. Like many things here..."

He bowed his head as he fell into thought. His stays in the Forest have been short, but now his stay is permanent. His fawn friends had grown up without him. He was worried that he would be outplace and that they would shun him out since he had been gone for so long, but much to his surprise, Shyla warmly welcomed him back the day before.

A smirk came to his face as he chuckled lightly, "I think I surprised Shyla yesterday, Usko...Though I was surprised myself by her."

A few memories from yesterday came to him. He thought about how nice it was to see her once again and how wonderful it was to run and leap like they use to before his brief disappearance. Another deer came to mind, an unknown deer that terrified poor Shyla and even chased her a bit. Paavo had done what he could to try to protect her but he questioned if his message got through to either her or the other deer.

He shook his head as the memories faded away. Rolling his neck, he returned to the Old Oak. He returned to the patted down grass and curled back up, trying to stay warm as he drifted back off to sleep.




Meander: To follow a winding and turning course; To move aimlessly and idly without fixed direction

The title is suppose to be a metaphor of the twist and turns in life.