Letter to an old friend...

It’s been 82 years since I last saw you...
I don’t even know if you’re okay or not but I still think about you. Not every day, but every so often I’ll think of you and my heart will hurt.

I found our old stuff in my box archive last night and I was talking to my husband about you (yeah I’m married now...Jonathan) and I cried a lot and talking about you to someone who wouldn’t judge me for it was really therapeutic.

I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for all that I put you through near the end of our friendship. I was jealous and acted out because of it. Distanced myself from you because I couldn’t stand the feeling of “losing you”.

I want you to know that was never your fault but mine. I’ve gone through some shit since we last talked and I’ve grown a lot...I think you’d approve of the me that I am now.

I wonder how you’ve turned out? How the Air Force was? My husband was in the Army and he’s told me about stories and stuff and I just hope you stayed safe all these years.

Would you be embarrassed if I posted on Facebook trying to find you? I’ve thought about doing that a lot...trying to find you. I always remembered you were a very private person..or maybe you don’t want to talk to me?

I don’t want to cause you issues but I guess I won’t know unless I try. I don’t really frequent these websites anymore so you can find me on Facebook. So I am gonna post this message on all of our “spot” websites and hope you see it before I do it so I don’t cause you problems but...I want to find you.

Creepy right? Well I was going for more endearing but...oh well...

I’m Caitlin Desharnais and you knew me as so many names...Lust, Phale, Mrs. Fall/Halloween, Zombitch...and hopefully one of those names was friend because as I remember it we were best friends. At least you were to me.

Talk to you soon...I hope.



Some people just don't want

Some people just don't want to be found/contacted.. they have moved on, for their own reasons judged it was the right thing to do -- and you should, too. Work on Your healing process.

Good luck & stay safe in these trying times Mrs. H..