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Verycrazygirl's picture
Christmas Gifts Blog



Takeharu Ishimoto - Fufilled Desire (Crisis Core Soundtrack)


Forecast


Weather: Sunny
Time: Day
Forest Magic: None

3/1/11



Vee Blog


Feral Hearts is finally, but unofficially out.
However their servers are very dodgy, you might have to keep coming back and trying to get in until it works.
I'll post the link when it's ready.






-

Final Fantasy 7 Gaming Phase.
Crisis Core - Completed (Sniff ;_;)
Last Order Anime - Completed
Original Game - Playing
Advent Children - Watch After Game
Final Fantasy Dirge of Cerberus - Trying to obtain

3/1/11
Connection: Good
Pictos: Good
Framerate: 15fps



Bios & Links

Veegamer@hotmail.co.uk
Verycrazygirl's picture

Didn't understand that.

Didn't understand that. <D Sorry...
It's merely a rant in disguise caused by insecurity a former friend caused me. ^^'

Hraeth's picture

It's alright.

It's alright. <3 It's just something that I can really relate to somehow.
It's like you put into words what I've wanted to tell myself on many occasions.

Hmm... I think I somehow know

Hmm... I think I somehow know how you feel. I mean I do feel quite insecure in this community. I made some friends, but it's somehow hard for me to keep in touch with them. When I see them in these little groups, with friends, I don't wish to interfere them. Even on the interaction blogs. I feel like I'm pretty annoying actually and my every act or word bothers others. Even when I write this I feel like everybody thinks I'm a damn crybaby and an attention whore. And I blame myself for this as I'm none of them. At least I think so.
I have indeed noticed that Virgil isn't protecting anyone as he used to... I remember the first time I saw his bio and thought that having him as a guardian must be a real honor. And I wanted my deer to become a great guardian too, but instead my main character "became" a doe and everyone knows does should be protected rather than be the ones who protect, blah blah blah.
I think Virgil is needed. There are many deer who need him even if he's not their protector officially. For example, hm, Kiyoko? I may not know this thread very well, but from what I see they're very close to each other. And so... Virgil is some kind of a protector to her, isn't he?
Ahh, hope I didn't bore you with my little monologue. I hardly ever have an occasion to express my opinions and feelings so I just snatched the opportunity. But I do know the feeling of insecurity.
Hope you'll feel better soon :)
Verycrazygirl's picture

Hraep: I'm glad! Thought for

Hraep:

I'm glad! Thought for the moment I accidently offended you. ^^;

estme:

I never imagined you could be insecure! Shocked You've always seemed like a calm and friendly member!

Mmm, we've moved a long way since then, he's supposed to be a guardian to anyone instead of officially listed... He'll /try/ to help anyone, if ever allowed. Though, once recently he protected a fawn from someone and I got snapped at oocly for taunting just once at the person who seemed to be taunting the fawn. Sticking out tongue
Kiyo. <3 Yeah, I think they're close, we're really happy to be a protector for her, and that she allows us to protect her. It makes us feel needed.
But she can't be here that often, just a couple of times a month, so the rest of the time... mmf.
I'm glad you felt free to express yourself here. <3

ShadowsofLight's picture

In times gone by, Dancing

In times gone by,
Dancing and prancing
Whispers turned to shouts
And protection was down to them
The Noble Guardians of
Our Hallowed Home

Between the trees
They appeared on our beck and call
Ready to fight and save us
Sometimes whether we wanted saving or not
But times are passing forward
And the Noble Guardians are sent away

But look through the dark times
See through the erected walls
And look at the Guardians
Still, ever present
If quiet,
Defending the hallowed halls of our home
As they always have


I figured you could use some...I don't even know. Whatever that thing is.

Mick Kreiger: You Know You Love Me XOXO
Kaoori's picture

Hang in there, Miss Vee.

Hang in there, Miss Vee. <3

"Because as independant as

"Because as independant as you may be, you still need them."

And they still need you. Maybe not all of them, but there are still some.

It's not fair for you to get yelled at for "interfering" with something when you didn't even know about it.
Well, no need to worry about them, because you and Virgil are still loved. ♥
arrowdoe's picture

Vee, you're an incredible

Vee, you're an incredible person and I'll be damned to see you change your deer to suit the opinions of others. I'm sorry I'm not much for words- but I hope it will work out somehow... <3
Hraeth's picture

-least offend-able person on

-least offend-able person on earth- ilu. <3

Don't change to make everyone happy. Besides, it's impossible to please everyone. Trust me, I've tried. :U Giggle in their face and carry on.
Amazon's picture

I know how you feel.

I know how you feel. <3;

Doe's picture

Grumble grumble grumble.

Grumble grumble grumble.
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OokamiAzura's picture

Ilu...&hearts

Ilu...&hearts

Oh mai. THAT'S A NICE COLOR

Oh mai.

THAT'S A NICE COLOR FOR YOU VIRGIL-/brick'd
Doe's picture

PINK IS REALLY IN RIGHT

PINK IS REALLY IN RIGHT NOW.
IT'S SO FIERCE!

Grrrr! ;D
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xD Virvir is so FIERCE!

xD Virvir is so FIERCE! (Damnit Doe you took mah word but I'll use it anyway! xC)
ShadowsofLight's picture

666...devil comment

666...devil comment bby.

Virgil looks absolutely FABULOUS in pink.

Mick Kreiger: You Know You Love Me XOXO
Kiraki's picture

Oh darling, that pink is just

Oh darling, that pink is just fabulous XD
Verycrazygirl's picture

Omai babe, tatally kickass in

Omai babe, tatally kickass in pink. You should go pink too.
:3

:v -happy roll-

:v -happy roll-

track

track
I am but mad north-north-west: when the wind is southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw. ~William Shakespeare
Kaoori's picture

Yuna: Sir..? Thank you.. for

Yuna: Sir..? Thank you.. for your help. The little doe offered a bow, then trotted off.

Hello there. Just a few

Hello there.
Just a few things I'd love to say. Things that alot of the community has been blind to with the exception of the select few you've abused and treated like shit for the last, I dunno. Year and a half, now? Where to start. Oh, right.
First of all.


I think I'd like to show the things you said to me on Friday. Things you said to me that broke my heart, because I had believed we were friends. Good friends. And the moment I decided to say my opinion- just as everyone else had- you stabbed me in the back, and then blocked me, without giving me the chance to respond.

Vee says: Hi I'm just posting this to say goodbye

Failingartist says: O.o

Vee says: You were a good friend a few months ago. Now you've become too engulfed in the popularity you've recieved. I HATE people who think they're better than everyone else. So bye

Failingartist says: Popularity? You aren't up and leaving without telling me the whole deal, here, hun. You don't get off that easy. Where is this coming from?

Vee says: I'll round it off with this
I feel you only ever used me
And I can't stand your attitude anymore


~At this point, you signed off, leaving me feeling horrible because I had done nothing that I could think of that could have brought this on from you. I was confused, hurt, and felt utterly betrayed. So much so that I kept posting because I had nothing else to do.

Failingartist said (3:48 PM): Used you? You were a friend to me, and I you Vee. You've pissed me off more times than I can count, and you were forgiven more than you deserved.

Failingartist said (3:49 PM): I feel belittled and apalled that you would bother doing this; it's immature, to say these things to my face and then leave me with no word. I'm hurt that you think I ever /used/ anyone. Who do you think I am? YOU?
I can tell you this much: I am glad I have what friends I have, popularity has nothing to do with it. That these opinions are my own and I am speaking them may offend some, and I am sorry to think you would drop the ball this far because of that.

Failingartist said (3:50 PM): I am sorry I ever knew you, VCG, and you can ask around. There is a good many who agree. I have nothing more to say to you.



~Some of this was just anger of the moment. Most of it was the truth.



We have spoken our private argument, but I fear this cannot be over until you fall from that pedestal of yours, hun. A friend of mine- someone you know very well- even said this:
"If you do not do this, who's to say she will not do it again, and again? If it is not brought to light, do you think she'll stop? I don't think so..."

And going by that wise statement, this will end.


To think that all I had done was finally voice my opinion after keeping silent. All I did was speak my mind- as had everyone else.
But I have another inhibition.

That it was not about that fruitless argument, or at least not entirely.

I think you got jealous. Jealous that after two years I had finally made a name for myself, finally become friends with the people I admired, finally became... My own person. That I didn't have to rely on you in order to stand. I was finally able to stand on my own, and be free of your power and popularity for once. And, by the way, your hypocrisy drives me to tears.

You think I am the one engulfed by power and popularity? I do not think I am popular at all. I hardly think popularity exists for the people who do not want it.
There is a difference between sitting on your throne, waving a hand and having people kiss it, and sitting on a chair of equal height to others, and having many friends. That is the difference between you and I. And it cut my heart when I realized that that is how you think of me. Power-hungry. Out to get your prized popularity.
Well, take it. I don't want anything to do with your he said, she said crap. You, and a certain lot of you, have bothered the site from day 1, and you know what? You wouldn't believe just how many agree. But I'm not here to threaten or harass you.

I'm not like you in that way.

I'll give you a chance to speak your mind.
All I wanted to do was say that what you had done.. Really hurt, Vee. You know this all too well. We were best friends. We played together. We spoke, we fought, we made up, we laughed, we enjoyed TEF for what it was meant to be. Not a popularity fest. People like that? They're honestly just too shallow to see real beauty, real fun, real friends when they're standing in front of them. I don't think badly of you, VCG.

You were one of my friends, Vee. You were someone I had trusted, someone I had been stupid enough to let watch my back when the weather got bad.

Someone who took the opportunity to stab me in the back when no one could see.
A blindside, with no witnesses.
It feels like a history class, doesn't it? You were cruel, no compassion, no mercy, no feelings, and incredibly immature, to hit me out of nowhere and then leave me without my final word.


And y'know what? I always get my say. It isn't my intention to bother you, because quite frankly, it's hardly worth my time.

But I do need to speak out. If not for myself, than for the people you've hurt/bothered/used/affected in the long run.

You've called me things like high and mighty; that I'm powerhungry and don't care about others, that I use them. When have I ever used anyone? If I have used anyone, anyone on here, please, step forward and tell me. I will apologise. But I honestly do not believe I ever have.

I rarely do anything other than make new friends, talk eye to eye with everyone I meet, and enjoy the community for what it is. And when people threaten the calm, then I get irritated. Nothing new came about because of anyone's ridiculous whining, and all I did was put forth an opinion that- believe it or not, a very many people agreed with. Oh, and god forbid I do speak my mind, no? You must've gotten used to me being subdued and bowing to your every will as the popular queen of the site, so the moment I broke free and did what I wanted, you cracked that whip of yours.
Don't worry. I know I'm not the only one you've done it to.

Raz and I talk quite alot. Though I don't approve of everything she's done, and I get irritated when old old posts of hers are bumped pointlessly, she and I get along quite well. And she's shown me things you've said to her.
They're really amusing.
You're funny.

I also thought I might mention hypocrisy, while we're on the notion of what's amusing. You, a vast many of us have decided, are the definition of a hypocrit (: You go along taking control of every person you can, and you greedily cling to that precious popularity of yours, and you join bloody plots. God forbid others get to do it. Yet you wander about and cut people down who do the same, you jeer at those who have more friends than you do. You spread lies and rumours behind people's backs out of spite and jealousy, because maybe they're just a bit more loved than you. Probably because you're so epic at being a bitch.
I'm good at it too.
Only when I've been wronged, or accused, or what have you. You on the other hand fire at will. Triggerhappy.



You also misinterpret the meaning behind my words. It's not just me, Vee. You do realize this, don't you?

This isn't some fight that happened just Friday which, by the way, you're right: the way you handled it was wrong, immature, and cruel. I can think of better ways it could have gone.
This is a feud that has been boiling up for... Well. Since the moment you became popular.
You're famous, Lottie.

Very famous.

So famous, that there's a bunch of us who have a few things we would love to share with the community about you, because a bunch of them are blind to it. There's alot of us hun. Alot of us who've been wronged, hurt, hunted and scared away. Chased out. All because you deemed them unworthy to walk your bitter palace in TEF. There's those that you lied about, tarnished their kind reputations because you wanted more, because you can't control that horrible greed of yours.

There's far too many of us behind this for me to turn back. And besides, what good would come of not posting it? You would simply go back to your old ways. It's what happens. It's happened many times before. You rage at people when there are no witnesses, you cut them up, and the moment others come running, you act like the victim and suck up to them, earning yourself a nice wall of defense from people you lie to. They're lucky they don't have to see the side of you we've all seen. I unfortunately have had to see it more than twice for myself.

I'm not doing this for satisfaction or anything of the sort.

I am quite afraid. I will get flamed. Maybe even chased away...


But to anyone who has the balls to try it, you can back off right now. You aren't part of this, but if you do get involved, I can't say this will go well.



... In the end, Vee, it's better for the people. You've hurt us one too many for it to be forgiven just like it always has been, so you can go back to your dirty work and snap more of us down. It has to stop. You've had countless chances, opportunities, to quit while you were ahead. Obviously you don't seem to understand.


Ultimately...
I am sad that it had to end this way, Vee.


Sad, but not sorry.





Verycrazygirl's picture

There is one huge flaw in

There is one huge flaw in your words.

It was not popularity I did it for. It never was.
It is not I who treats this as a popularity contest,
I am merely a very clingy person who is afraid of loosing those dear to her
and when they drift away, I react in the only way I know how to.
And it is always the wrong way. I push them away, I even hurt them.
I gain no pleasure in it at all. If anything, sadness.
I am very insecure, and easy to be scared.

Otherwise,
yes, I have wronged people.
Yes, I have been cruel.
Yes, I have made mistakes, it is only human to do so.
Many of your words are true, but at the same time, what you see is from a different perspective that I don't see. As I've already said, none of this was done out of popularity. The fact that my playing the game and being there day in day out for the last year or so that has allowed me to be in such things like "bloody" plots, as you've mentioned, or what have you is not my own purposeful doing. I don't play the game to relentlessly look for things I can stick my foot in if that was what you were implying. I have a dependancy on this game, I'll admit that, and that is the one reason why I seem to be so involved. I'm sorry for that, but it is and has never been forced.
And this:
Hypocrisy, we all do it, including you and everyone else.

-----

I would like to ask that nobody backs me up in this.
I do not want to be defended. And I do not want a large fight to erupt between and with members who are not involved with these spits.
It's okay. I made mistakes, and to learn, I must pay for them.
So I am learning, I will move on, and try my darned best to be a better person.

ocean's picture

- Hurr durr, just ignore this

-
Hurr durr, just ignore this post please. <3
Doe's picture

Crim. . . There was no need

Crim. . . There was no need to bring that onto here. Please take it back into IMs if you find it necessary to continue. This is not the place for that.

I'm not defending either one of you, but either way there's no need for this to be on here. <3
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Seenya's picture

Hypocrisy ? You speak of

Hypocrisy ?
You speak of it?
Vee , honestly.I remember you since the times of I.T.I remember exactly who you were , how you used to be.A bright person in my eyes.I do not understand why it changed so rapidly.If it wasn't popularity , then what?Could you clear my eyes then?There's more than only a bunch of people who can swear at anything you have changed like never.A lot in this case.
You have wronged people.Indeed.
You have been cruel.Indeed.
You have made mistakes.Indeed.
It is a human thing to do.Indeed.
"What you see, is not what I see." Yes , however...you didn't put any effort to try to understand how can the said person feel because of our words.You never tried to.I heard from many.Many people how it burns.The scars you etched into them.Like never ending torture.
Many dare not come back , and won't , simply because of their 'fear' to you.
I do not care if I will get flamed or not.Honestly , I wanted to show my own point of view.Since we have once crossed our paths as well , and what happens slightly brings me into a mixture of unknown , odd feelings.
"Immaturity is a perfect example in this case. <3"
And you my dear friend.Have proved in your case it is no diffrent as well.
I stated my honest opinion , and I feel good about it.

--------------------------
.:| Updates || Deers || Art |:.
Doe's picture

On a happier note, Doe has

On a happier note, Doe has decided that the reason Virgil's butt is a lighter colour, is because he sits on it so much, that he wore the paint off. :B
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I think Crimsongale clearly

I think Crimsongale clearly said, why she brought it onto here. She had her reasons.

I read both Crim's and VCG's posts. And just wanted to say I have never felt so... neutral. I mean nothing has surprised me really. My attitude hasn't changed at all.

However... It's already on the site.
Now you need to end it here.

First of all, Doe? Piss off.

First of all, Doe? Piss off. You aren't a part of this. Yet. And you have little knowledge about what's going on, and your nose doesn't belong here. And the reason I posted this was so people blinded by VCG's fake front would see who she really is.

As for you, Vee?
You're not too bright if you think apologising now will save you.

If you are so sorry for everything you've done- and hun, you've done alot- why didn't you stop? You've been forgiven many more times than you deserve, yet you kept crawling back and hurting more people. it's like you don't understand what it means to 'learn'.
Ask around. Alot of us are sick of it.

You've hurt many people. And the notion is, yes, people make msitakes. Yes, people hurt others.
The difference between you and others?
People learn, and people stop.

You just kept digging your own grave.


And thank you, estme, for paying attention when others clearly did not.
Doe's picture

Estme "However... It's

Estme "However... It's already on the site.
Now you need to end it here."

Yes please.
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Doe's picture

Whatever happened to that

Whatever happened to that post. . . Where everyone's IM names were listed?

I've either gone mad, or it's missing.

Although it's possibly both.
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kaitlyn's picture

IT WENT UP YOUR BUTT AND

IT WENT UP YOUR BUTT AND AROUND THE CORNER.
Doe's picture

I bet you put it there you

I bet you put it there you dirty girl. )<
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Oh dear god LOL

Oh dear god LOL
Doe's picture

It is going to be extremely

It is going to be extremely difficult. . . And possibly painful . . . For me to access that thread now. ):
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Seriously, this is getting

Seriously, this is getting more and more...
...interesting.

Good luck, Doe ._.
Doe's picture

THANK YOU ESTME . . . But.

THANK YOU ESTME . . .

But. . . Where I'm going, I won't need luck.

I may need some gloves. ._.
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OokamiAzura's picture

L asked me to take over that

L asked me to take over that blog.

It's right here.
Doe's picture

You couldn't have told me

You couldn't have told me that -before- I looked in my butt? ):
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kaitlyn's picture

You better look in your butt.

You better look in your butt.
Doe's picture

(No subject)

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kaitlyn's picture

Fuck kittens.

Fuck kittens.

Every time you f*ck a

Every time you f*ck a kitty,
a kitty is f*cked.

Please. Think of kittens.
Seenya's picture

This is a serious

This is a serious discussion.Please , stop making it light and let it be done.I guess everyone wants it to come to a conclusion.

--------------------------
.:| Updates || Deers || Art |:.
Custard's picture

Serious business is boring.

Serious business is boring.
I liked what it was turning into, I just worry we are spamming VCG's blog. At least we spam it with epicness and not silly arguments.

I SAY CONTINUE LOOKING UP YOUR BUTTS AND WHAT-NOT PLEASE Cool
Doe's picture

You're sick, Custard. You

You're sick, Custard. You need help. ):

Telling people to look up their butts is not normal. )<
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It's not much of a silly

It's not much of a silly argument if it involves people getting hurt by the actions of someone who has failed to understand the meaning of 'stop.'

I agree with Custard. Because

I agree with Custard. Because custard is yummy.

Seenya: We are curious about the discussion, but we stayed neutral. We're not involved in it really so why not having some fun while waiting for the conclusion?
But sorry if we were disturbing you. We really didn't mean to ;)
Custard's picture

I am so totally proud of my

I am so totally proud of my sickyness. If you want to have a petty argument, use the blog that was posted and email or something!
This is Vee's blog which was made for awesomeness. Like looking up Doe's butt. Wait, I don't think she will appreciate that much, Doe. My butt would have been less of an eye-sore.

I amma yummy yummy.
Doe's picture

No no. Vee would want it this

No no. Vee would want it this way. She always loved it when I'd look up my butt. );
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